Wednesday, October 03, 2012

Abismo de pasión #142 10/2/12: An Aging Sexpot Becomes Important To the 'Plot' and Gael Finds That He Is Going to be a Daddy

Introduction

Seven monkeys are in a nice office at Televisa HQ, with seven aged desktop computers. (Ed. We do not need more monkeys that seven to demonstrate 'Infinite Monkey Theorem for Abismo—seven will do.)  After a moment of observing them, It is clear that these fine simians are the writers for Abismo De Pasion. This is the dialogue that followed, as I was able to understand it. Monkeys speak fast and heavily accented Spanish...

"Let's add another meaningless character to the story of Abismo de Pasion. Why don't we do it now (instant gratification) while we are already in Ultimas Semanas? Oh, YES! The delighted monkeys clap their hands in glee. I know, says the alpha male, a huge brute named Fluffy. I learned a new concept in Behavioral Science today—'Aging Sexpot'.
'Aging sexpot?' cry the other monkeys, as they try the phrase on for size. "Aging sexpot? I like it", says the sycophant monkey standing behind Fluffy. "I really like it. This could be worked in with the other random elements we have strung together in place of a plot." 

"Don't think of this show as having a PLOT!" shrieks the Alfa Fluffy as he capers around the room, taking control of the group firmly. "Think of this as... as...a soup, stone soup in which we can throw in any ingredient, bring it to a boil and then watch as it evaporates away, meaningless." In the sudden shift of mood that characterizes monkeys and is best exemplified by Gael in 'Abismo', the writing, typing, and story-running monkeys screech, scream and insult one another, pelting one another with the rotten fruit that covers the floor of their large office. "You people are losing your meta-physical edge," Fluffy snarls. "Think Sopa de Albondigas and start typing.The first one done gets a rotten banana!

And, with this fine incentive, our writers type madly away on their ancient word processors.

Thus, our episode—Abismo de Pasion 132, Ultimas Semanas

Refrito

Aging Sexpot Carito starts out the episode by promising to help Elisa with her 'plot' to buy la quinta from Carmina.
Paloma says goodbye to Doc Tovar and tells him he has been like a father to her. She also finds out that her mother, Remedios, sacrificed her life for Paloma when she was born. How sad.

Everybody Is At Elisa's Procesadora Today
Outside the new and prosperous procesadora Yucateca Begonia begins insulting Paloma to her son Enrique. "That girl is a low-down, base born tramp. She could be pregnant by anybody..."( a loose translation, I'll admit, but it captures the idea). Begoña sure knows how to endear herself to her children. Right then, Elisa walks by and overhears the conversation. "Is Paloma pregnant?", she asks. QuiQue tries to equivocate but Elisa asks, "Is she pregnant of not?" Enrique now throws his Mom under the bus, this is just another case of her gossip and lies, but Elisa isn't buying it. Enrique suggests that it would be better for Elisa to speak about this directly with Paloma. When Begoña insults Paloma again, comparing her to 'sluts' like Elisa and Carmina, Elisa takes the luscious, ripe habanero out of her hand, shoves it in Begone's face and rubs it all over her mouth. That will give Begoña a taste of her own medicine! Begone grabs her burning face as Elisa walks away. Go Spunky Elisa! Enrique shakes his head at his mom and walks back into work.

Cemetery
Don Lucio and Lolita are at the cemetery with two workers. In his dramatic and expansive way, Lucio tells the workers that he wants this new headstone to be the most beautiful in the La Ermita graveyard. Well, it is about TIME! opines your recapper! Stef is going to finally get a decent grave marker. How about a mausoleum, with angels and cherubs like Rosendo's? Well, I guess Viewerville will have to wait and see what these guys come up with. There are some great stone workers in the Yucatan. Lolita chimes in..."the most beautiful...etc" as Lucio exhorts the workers that the memorial must be ready as soon as possible. It doesn't matter what it costs! Lucio hands over a cheque to sel the deal. Lolita thinks this is a great gift for Elisa. Lucio says that he and Blanca thought of Estefania as a daughter and that it's a crying rotten shame that Augusto never got his act together to give Stef a proper memorial. Lucio and Delores look at each other, seeming very pleased with themselves. "Things are changing around here," pronounces Lucio. He wants the workers to get cracking so that the project is done in time to be a surprise for Elisa! Delores has an idea—perhaps the workers could work round the clock!
(Ominous Horacio music plays. We know who is living the the cemetery, don't we?) Lolita wants to know how to contact the caretaker—el velador—to get permission for the workers to work into the night. The workers tell her that el velador lives in the little shack, right over there. If you go there you will surely find him. The music hots up as Lolita heads toward her ex-husband's hideout.

Braulio Starts Over
Braulio visits with an estate agent and rents a sweet little house. "Para mi solo." he sighs. FF>.

Back at the Cemetery
Horacio is eating something. Why does he always look like his mouth is too full? Is he supposed to be a vulgar guy with no manners? Is he supposed to be in a hurry or hungry? I can't figure it out. Anyway, Lolita comes to the door, looking for the caretaker. Horacio hides from her in plain site apparently afraid to even chew his food or swallow for the noise it will make. Delores knocks a couple of times, then gives up. She'll come back later. Horacio is muy impactado.

Hacienda Arango
Lately, the subtitles on the screen have given lie to the house really having the name 'Haciendo Arango'. Seems the owners want a little more credit for their lovely home. Can't say I blame them. That would be a fun house to rent for a Caray houseparty. Oh, yes, the recap. Focus, Elna June, focus. Gabino walks down the entry walk of Hacienda Arango to find his bastard son Vicente (emphasis on the 'bastard') sitting at the fountain. Chente greets Daddy Gabino with a proper show of filial affection, hanging on Gabino like a hungry leach. In a now familiar move, Gabino shoves 'Chente away from himself, the very center foldout for 'Bad Parenting" magazine. Of course, if he was dressed in just his towel, I would have to read the article, just to see how not to parent. Naturally, I would be reading the article, not gaping at the foldout of Gab's rippling abs++. The things I do for my children....Oh yeah, Gabino wants to know just what Chente is made of. Does he really want to be the son of Gabino Mendoza? Then let's see what Chente is capable of, shall we? For you I will be anything, smarms the little worm to his Father. I am Vicente, Vicente Mendoza. Suspenseful music plays, but there is no real suspense. We already know Chente is a snot, an ass, and is not worthy of Braulio as his step-dad. Nothing the little dirtbag does will surprise me. Gabino lets Chente know that if he is pleased with Vicente's behavior, maybe they can spend some time together—as a family! Gabino grimaces as he says the word, 'family'. To place this scene in really high contrast, we now go int eh house to see that Braulio has been waiting for Vicente in order to give him a gift, out of his first bonus from the procesadora. It is a beautiful watch.

Doc Tovar's Home for Fallen Heroines (Medical office)
Paloma comes to the office, once AGAIN, to say goodbye to her girl, Florencia. They are sooo close, you see, just like that (recapper crosses her fingers). They have been friends for what, a week? Paloma already misses Doc Tovar—and Enrique in a different way, of course. Mostly she is grateful for Florencia's FRIENDSHIP, blah, blah, blah. (Recapper wails. this is gross, man. Do I really have to recap it? Just do your best, Elna June, says my overwrought inner voice.) Paloma thanks Flo for her care and support. (More sappy music tinkles in the background. I am not moved). Paloma begs Flo to take care of Doc Tovar and Enrique—Flo promises. They stare, teary-eyed at one another, while each describes the surprise she has at the character of the other. Flo thanks Ramona, as well. Paloma and Ramona were the only people to give Florencia a chance, to lend her a hand. Everyone is very teary. Paloma can't think of any other excuse for staying and after more tears and hugs, she leaves the office and patients to Florencia's tender mercies.

Ramona's Casita
Elisa goes to visit Doña Ramona. Paloma is not there, but Ramona tells her that she and her nieta are leaving L'Ermita tonight. It is true that the house looks all packed up and cleaned out. Elisa's sluggish brain makes a few chemical connections.  "Is it true," Elisa asks Paloma's grandmother. "Paloma is pregnant with Gael's child?" In her usual maddening way Ramona answers a question with a question. "Who told you?" queries Donna Ramona? "It doesn't matter," says Elisa. "Is it true?" Ramona sighs and says, "You are not wrong Elisa." (Geez, Ramona, out with it, would you?) "Paloma is pregnant and is expecting a child of Gael." Elis ais muy impactada. " ¡Dios mio!" she mutters. "How long have you known? Why didn't she tell me?", begs Elisa. "Because you and gael were going to to be married, Elisa. Paloma did not want to mess things up for you." Ramona also confirms that Enrique is really in love with Paloma."  Little E. continues, "So...Gael thinks that the baby is Enriques." Ramona states the now-obvious, "This is why they fought earlier." Elisa wants Paloma to tell Gael the truth, but Ramona reminds her that Paloma is not just interested in finding a father for her bebe—she is in love with Gael. Ramona changes tack. "Did you know that Paloma once tried to kill herself" Elisa is shocked and asks how. Paloma took an overdose of one of Ramona's herbal concoctions, but, God be thanked, Doc Tovar saved her. Elisa feels terrible for her poor friend.

Merida Hospital
Damian and Alfonsina discuss her poor brother, Guadalupe. He has gone back to the pueblo to turn over the church to the new priest. Look on the good side, Damian exhorts his mother. Lupe will get to stay in L'Emita and will even come to live with them in la hacienda. "You love him very much," states Dam. "He is my brother", responds Alfie. "That's the way of siblings," says Damian. "You are very lucky you got to experience the care and love of your brother growing up." But Alfie is having nothing to do with Damian's heavy handed attempt at drawing an analogy. "Ay, por Dios, hijo..." Alfie doesn't want to hear Damian's reproaches right now. Damian lets the subject go and leaves his mom for a hotel in Merida.

Carito
Carito, Carito, whence came thou Carito? So Carito, our monkey-given aging sexpot is plopped into the show, as though she is the very plot element that can bring everything together and end the show with a bang. Well, simians, it isn't working. I do not care about Carito, and I do not want to get to know her. She is a fine looking woman with a world-class figure but just give her a date with Doc Tovar and get her out of my face. Finally, I hate her hair. Why are 40 something women like Lourdes Mungia and Lucero going for this more used bed-head hair? Her hair looks like a shorter version of Paloma's. Lucio tells Carito that he doesn't know how to repay her for her help in furthering the plot to buy the quinta from Carmina. No problem, she admires Elisa's strength, she has a daughter about her age in Mexico City. We find out that her husband is living but for her he might as well be dead. Then Carito has another one of her fainting spells. The monkeys are worried about the aging sexpot. So is Don Lucio. I am not because she had to meet Doc Tovar somehow. Lucio revives her with some piece of cotton under her nose—I do not know with what smelling salt it was soaked. He insists that she see a doctor. She won't go but Lucio walks her home, again. Maru sees this interchange and looks upset.

Damian Is Sighted Wearing Only A Towel
Damian is seen in his hotel room in just a towel. He is wet. He does a full three-minute ride down memory lane, remembering his special interval on the beach with Elisa. He says, "Mi Elisa," and holds on to his AMULET for all its worth. Yes, I mean amulet. I re-watch the scene several times. It is possible that I missed some dialogue when he was wet and just out of the shower. Nope. Guess not. But at least I am sure. It's diligence like this that nets us recappers the big bucks.

Elisa and Delores at Don Lucio's House
Elisa blows in and tosses her keys on the table. Everything is really horrible. Paloma is pregnant with Gael's child. Lolita laments Paloma's mistakes, but Elisa corrects her—the only mistake made by Paloma was to love the wrong man. Sort of like her (Elisa) and Damian. Anvil makers in TN heaven get really busy on the 'Elisa is preggers" special edition, to be used in the near future. Elisa cries, "I have no tears." Liar. She starts crying. All she has is fury at both Gael and Damian. (Now, your talking, Elisa!) Elisa remembers the good times but Lolita states the obvious—what if you are in the same situation as Paloma? DUH DUN DUN, the music moves the scene forward with three strong chords...What if you are pregnant? Elisa is in denial. Lolita points out that pregnancy can happen to any woman who is not careful. Little E. stamps her foot. It doesn't matter. She has decided to completely forget about Damian Arango. Lolita isn't buying the program. And what about Gael? Elisa is going to do the only thing she can, she says, and she storms out the door.

Enrique Visits His Dad
Doc Tovar says that Begoña is changing. QuiQue says she hasn't changed one bit. Edmundo tells Enrique that he and Begone love Enrique. But Enrique tells his dad how Begoña behaved at the procesadora today, and that Elisa (his BOSS, no less!) now knows ALL. Doc will talk to Begone. He tells Enrique that Paloma is leaving L'Ermita tonight, for good. Later Edmundo berates Begoña for her stupidity.

Carmina and Lupe In Front of the Church
Carmina accosts 'Lupe as he is about to enter his former church. Words are exchanged. Throughout the dialogue, Carmina is hissing and mush mouthing, but her message is clear. She is threatening Lupe. He tells her he is absolutely sure that she killed Augusto in addition to all her other crimes. He calls her a 'BAD woman'. Well that is an understatement, Lupe. Guadalupe says he will tell Elisa all, when the time is right. (I think these two should just get horizontal and be done with it. What great chemistry the actors have together! I love their scenes—they are a much hotter couple than Elisa and Damian). Carmina leaves with a hiss and he comes into the rectory and meets the new priest.  By this time tomorrow, all this will be Padre Miguel's!—the rectory and the church, as well. Sigh.

Gael and Elisa Look For One Another
Gael comes a-looking for Elisa at Don Lucio's while Elisa is looking for him around town. Delores tells Gael that Elisa is not home. Elisa runs into Guadalupe on her way to find Gael. He tells her to call him Guadalupe (not Padre, because he is no linger a Father. and tells her of his new mission—he is responsible for the love and happiness of the four children who were Elisa, Gael, Damian and Paloma. THIS is his new mission. Wow. From the sublime to the ridiculous, Guadalupe. What a fate! Elisa tells Lupe that she knows Gael is the father of Paloma's child. Finally Elisa finds Gael at his home. WE have to talk, elisa says flatly. Gael starts in on a rant-and-rave stating the Paloma is expecting a baby by Enrique—so much for her grand love for Gael. But Elisa has the last word. This bebe, "es tuyo, Gael."

Ramona's Casita
Enrique goes to Ramona's to try and stop Ramona and Paloma from leaving town. While Enrique berates Paloma for leaving without saying goodbye, Ramona comes running in with a story—she has to see a man about a horse. A sick horse. A horse with a cough. She cannot leave tonight! It works for me, Ramona, to keep Paloma from leaving town, but Paloma looks skeptical and accuses her grandmother of using a ruse to keep them from leaving tonight.

EJ

I missed the avances, Please fill in as you like.

Labels:


Comments:
What we learned tonight:

Carito's hair is too dark & her dress is too small.

Begona is a weed that needs to be plucked.

Carmina is desperate, broke & paranoid, and desperate/broke/paranoid people are dangerous.

Tona's boobs were disappointed that Braulio didn't stay to dinner.

I think Gael was saying in the avances that he wasn't marrying Paloma baby or not.
 

Great comments Anon207. 'Begone' is a weed that needs to be plucked.' Great line, Anon. Are you a gardener? Thanks for writing the avances. I took a call and missed them entirely.

Take care Anon 207 and thanks for your comments.

EJ
 

EJ, your intro (and in fact the entire recap) is positively brilliant. I am amazed, impressed and only slightly frightened by how your mind works.

OMG Elisa really did rub the habanero in Begone's face! I hope the monkey who wrote that got a bananabonus.

I loved "this is gross, man. Do I really have to recap it?" Amiga, we feel your pain.

"It's diligence like this that nets us recappers the big bucks." Manager, double her salary right now!! Your Dam Towel paragraph is dam hilarious. Thanks for taking one for the team, heh. And who was that chick in the bar? Please telenovela gods, no more new characters! Or maybe that was to show that Dam doesn't ALWAYS drop trou whenever Elisa rejects him? I'm not convinced.

EJ, thank you for your recap that made this episode so very enjoyable for me. It was fun to read along and laugh at your unique perspective as I watched.

That Chente is such a loser. I get nervous when Gab keeps blathering on about how Chente can "prove" he is Gab's son. Bah.

 


"Don't think of this show as having a PLOT!"

EJ - you summed it up brilliantly. Your seven monkeys theory absolutely nails how this TN is rolling out. I think it went past my theory of gel-pen teeny boppers long ago. And now we are getting the "let's drag this out really slow" stage.

How many times does Pal have to say goodbye to certain people? Do we really have to listen to Begona endlessly trashing any woman in town under the age of 25? And Chente should have never made it out of that kidney transplant ( and the point of that was?????)

I agree, the whole aging sexpot plot is so lame. Random woman who everyone knows but had never surfaced before is suddenly the center of the last major plot development ( and I agree the term Plot is relative here.) Maybe the moneys figured we needed to see somone new to keep us tuning in since we really don't care much about the front and center characters we've had so far.

And for the love of all....why is Lucio the one buying the head stone? Why did it not cross that blubbering little sexpot's mind to buy this for her mother herself?? Some heroine.

I would like to applaud the seven monkeys for their wonderful consistent PSA message in this TN that to eventually win your man, just have unprotected sex and get preggers. Whether he likes it or not, he'll eventually do the right thing, marry you and everyone will be all smiles ( at least until the Finale is over and we won't see the ugly reality afterwards.) Welcome to the La Ermita alternate universe of common sense.

Personally, I say to keep viewers and recappers happy ( and they need to TRIPLE the recappers reward for dealing with this one) we should not see new characters, but a designated 2-3 shirtless scenes of at least 5 minutes each with the hunky guys of this TN each day. THAT would hold my interest until the pitiful end.
 

Ah Elna June, I love your recaps...especially when you're in a cranky mood over the insanity of our telenovela.

"centerfoldout for 'Bad Parenting' magazine." (Wonderful image. Not as great an image as an actual photo of our wicked Gabino, but close!)

"She is a fine looking woman with a world-class figure but just give her a date with Doc Tovar and get her out of my face. Finally, I hate her hair." (Yeah, it's really hard to like this actress. She's so darn gorgeous and did we look like that at 40 or so? no! more's the pity. And I agree, I like her hair more when it's straightened but I think that's her natural curl)

"A full three-minute ride down Memory Lane" (for some reason, that line just cracked me up. Have to admit, I gasped a little at that shot of Damian, low-riding towel, leaning into the mirror. What a fine fellow he is when he's not saying or actually doing anything!)

"throughout the dialogue Carmina is hissing and mush mouthing" (I'd sure like this actress better if she would just e.nun.ci.ate. but el Padre is so easy to understand. Now if he'd just get rid of that unfortunate ascot!)

Since the only mission left for him is to save the four bedraggled principals of the story, I think Guadalupe's days are definitely numbered. Another beloved person in the Ermite cemetery.

Finally, I hope they give the Horacio actor a more glamorous role next time. I hate seeing this sexy actor looking so crusty.

Pure pleasure reading this though, Elna June. Thanks so much.
 

Good stuff, Elna June.

I actually cheered when Elisa rubbed the cut habanero on BeGoneYa's poisonous mouth. That's the Elisa we were hoping for from the early episodes. Let's be rid of BeGoneYa and put the doc out of his misery so he can find a decent woman.

And I'd love for there to be a good woman for the former Padre.
 

"I think Guadalupe's days are definitely numbered."

I hate to think it, but you're probably right Judy. I've been suspecting that his pushing Carmina is just going to cause her to snap again. And we know what happens when she snaps. In fact, I've been trying to figure out what in the blazes will make Gael finally hook with Pal and the Padre's demise may do that. dying wish or something.

I should add on my gripe on the PSA messaging, that it's just as bad a message to the dudes out there. Yeah, just go with the moment with no thought of oh, just maybe, there could be repercussions? What century were these seven monkeys born in?
 

What a deliciously perfect punishment for a nasty trash-talking town gossip - have your lips rubbed with a habanero. Her lips deserved a good burning after all the horrible baseless things she's said over the years. And what a foolish woman for trash talking Quique's boss right in front of both of them! She's incorrigible!

Thanks much EJ. Sorry you had to deal with so much monkey trash, but your made it fun for the rest of us!
 

Well if Elisa bought Estefania the headstone, she wouldn't be a victim.

Having the pitiful grave looking all forlorn in the cemetary allows Elisa to cry, sob and be a victim.
 

It may take 7 monkeys jumping on typewriters to come up with the nutty script for this show, but it takes one brilliant EJ to decipher it for us. Thank you for this great recap.

Was that a collective GAG I heard when Chente announced in his big-boy voice "Yo soy Chente Mendoza"? Just sickening.

Loved the brief Horacio sighting. I still think he will go out in a blaze of heroic glory. I was thinking he'd be saving Lolita from something, but now I am wondering if Elisa's threats to Orange have put an anvil over Elisa, thus giving Horacio a chance to save Lolita's nina, for which she'll always love him.

Looks like we have to wait until Thursday to see what Gael's reaction to the baby news will be.

Rosemary la Otra
 

I'm routinely compelled to express my admiration for the recappers on this blog. Another work of art! Its funny that the writing here so outclasses that of the novellas themselves.
 

Elna June,

Your recap was amazing, better than the actual episode itself.
 

Does anyone else sing the words to We are the Champions with that identical music? I can't even follow the dialogue as all I hear in my head is
I've paid my dues
Time after time
I've done my sentence
But committed no crime
Then by the time the next scene comes, I am singing WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS at full throttle. Very distracting.
 

Anon207 has got it right. The PSA for this ridiculous TN is: "Be a Victim and you will WIN!!"

Somewhere along the line, this TN took a turn for the worse. Now, it's just one gran circo. Mejia...are you there? This looks right up your alley.
 

Thanks EJ for this great recap. You not only take one for the team but create work far better than the original.

Little E forcing Begonya to "eat her words" was fun. And she is still trying to stay with the whole, both brothers can visit Hades as far as she is concerned. Though we know once she sees Dam, she'll forget her promise.

ITA w/Judy that Lupe's days are numbered :(
 

EJ- Another snarky masterpiece. Many thanks.

Fovorite moment was the habanero pepper and Be-gone.

Why hasn't Lupe started spilling his secrets already? What's the delay? He's no longer a priest. He should be telling Elisa, Damian, Alfie, Lolita, whoever will listen, that Carmina was Rosie's lover who he was running away with, the Orange one is a ho, and he thinks she killed her husband when he found out the truth. I don't care that he has no proof of that last one. Broadcast it! Then, if he winds up dead, everyone will know who to blame.

Isn't there a PA system in that town somewhere? The church or the town square? Do it ex-Padre Loopy!
 

No kidding. Paloma takes all day to say goodbye and ex-Padre keeps threatening Carmina with the truth. Come on people. Say goodbye. Tell the truth. Five minutes later we can move on.

ITA that Elisa is a complete loser for not improving Stef's grave before now. I think Anon207 got it right. Again. No pathetic grave no llorathon.
 

A fabulous recap--loved the monkey writing team and all the other recapper asides. The monkeys should at least send you a nice fruit basket for deciphering their work.
La Paloma
 

Mi querida Elna June:

Reading this is just a joy. I am so delighted with the visual image that arises from your application of the "Infinite Monkey Theorem" -- and in particular, the third paragraph -- that I had to read it several times, savoring it a bit more with each reading:

"In the sudden shift of mood that characterizes monkeys and is best exemplified by Gael in 'Abismo', the writing, typing, and story-running monkeys screech, scream and insult one another, pelting one another with the rotten fruit that covers the floor of their large office."

Wow!

I wonder though. The Infinite Monkey Theorem deals with randomness; I would suggest that this novela is anything BUT random. It is a perfect marriage of art and commerce and cultural stereotypes. Even if a viewer sees only pirated videos, in any corner of the globe he or she will be inundated with promos for the Yucatán, La Anita, El Yucateco, Tostachos and lately CHICKEN SOUP!

As for the art part, we have been given a universe in which almost all misfortune stems from deliberate EVIL; and the remedy will be intervention of the GOOD (perhaps on behalf of the divinity, but still...). None of that "When bad things happen to good people" in La Ermita. Here, EVIL People happen to Good People.

We need new blood because so many characters have been bumped off. Now if this were a tragedy, we could end with a stage littered with corpses and listen to, say, Florencia, deliver one of Fluffy's soliloquies.

But this is a combo of a Classic Tragedy and a Harlequin Romance. And the stage must be littered with flowers and rug rats at the end with at least a few fatuously beaming couples, though not necessarily the obvious ones.

P.S. Where is the Recappers' Department of Human Resources? Apparently my check has been lost in the mail.
 

Love your post, Novela Maven....especially that last paragraph! Classic Tragedy, Harlequin Romance, rug rats and fatuously beaming couples. What a picture!
 

Great job EJ. Loved the monkey writers. How did you know? Did you stop in?

He says, "Mi Elisa," and holds on to his AMULET for all its worth. Yes, I mean amulet.
Do you mean this is not a metaphor?

I really hate it when a character continues to love someone who has mistreated them continuously, like Paloma and Gael. The writers always play up this love at first sight/destiny thing and I can't stand it. What a doormat that she will continue to love him, no matter what he ever says or does to her.
 

Thanks so much, Elna June. Your recap made my day.

Getting away from La Ermita has done wonders for Dam. He was looking good in his city hospital-visit duds...white shirt instead of plaid, stylish jeans instead of cowboy jeans. He even looked more relaxed, even while talking with his horrible mother. Of course, he also looked fine without the clothes, as was so diligently observed and reported.

Just go, Paloma. I hate it when people drag out their goodbyes. Do they even have a plan for where they're going?
 

Hello!

Thank you for all the lovely comments. I am especially gratified that you kind readers overlook my typos and editing errors.

Capn Sylvia- Ah, praise from the praise worthy is the sweetest gift of all. I am grateful, amiga, that my mind only slightly frightens you. Imagine how I feel, living with it! Hahahaha.

Like you, Sylvia, and other dear readers have mentioned having Elisa rub a burning hot habanero in Begoña's foul mouth was a treat not to be missed. I have waited a long time for that moment of comeuppance for Mrs. BeGone!

Also, I want to thank you in advance for the raise. '0 x 0 = MORE' sounds like an equation with logic straight out of an overripe Telenovela.

I ignored the woman at the bar because I could. Also, I hated her headband. If she expects to get picked up at a bar by David Zepeda she has got to try harder than that.

Daisynjay: Thank for your great comment. ITA with all of it! The PSA message, "Have unprotected sex, get pregnant and make a little family that lives sadly ever after," makes me want to get a straw and blow bubbles in my coffee. Ay Caray!

EJ
 

Oh, JudyB:

You caught me and correctly named my mood as cranky. And petty, like a mean girl. Sigh.

The sad thing is I LIKE Lourdes M. when she doesn't appear at the last minute in my telenovela. She is drop dead gorgeous and I love that an "older" (and I use that word under advisement) actress would be shown as desirable and sexy. After I wrote this I realized that, as mentioned by Anon 207 in her first post, Lourdes hair is too uniformly black and that is part of the problem. I have stubbornly wavy/curly hair, I cut her a break for that. It's just the bed-head too-much-product style that I think does her no favors.

I like Sabine so much as a villain, I just wish she would use-her-words instead of growling and hissing with such menace. Growling and hissing are very effective in person, but most difficult for this recapper, with her limited grasp of Spanish to translate. I have been without subtitles in any language for nine months now; so I depend on the actors enunciating just a little.

Oh say it isn't so in your prognostication that 'Lupe is not long for this world. I adore my boyfriend Rene, I do not want him to die! I am sure, however, that you have read those tea leaves correctly. 'No one can escape their destiny,' as Ramona has told us so many times before.

Thanks Urban Anthropologist, for your comment. Teasing you...did you say you would like to be the good woman for the former Padre? If so, you and me both!

Audrey—Can you believe what an IDIOT Begoña was? Elisa IS Enrique's boss. I would want to disown MY momma if she was that dumb in public!

EJ
 

Awww, JudyB

I'm such a fan of yours that any word of praise from you is sweet indeed. Thank you.

Have you noticed that Dam never looks like he needs a shave? Doesn't he seem like the kind of guy who has 5 o'clock shadow by noon and has to shave twice a day? And yet 3 days on the beach -- nada. Overnight at Mami's bedside in the hospital -- nada.

I wonder if Fluffy and company held focus groups and found that Dam with facial hair elicited aggressive displays while clean-shaven Dam elicited ... um ... another sort of display.

I also wonder if any bonobos were on the monkey team. If not, this would be a good time to bring them on board.
 

The Peppering of Begoña was reminiscent of an earlier scene where Gabino Self-Peppered with evident enjoyment. What a guy. No wonder Chente admires him so much and was willing to go along with a plot to destroy Elisa's ProCe and in the bargain, everything that Braulio owns.
 

R la O! So good to see you, m'dear. I like your idea that Horacio saves Lolita + Elisa. then he can go out with a little redemption. I love teh symbolism that he is living in a graveyard—that's one dead man walking.

1001 Chloe Nights: On behalf of all of our Abismo recappers, I thank you for your complement. Really, we recappers are paid only in the coin of appreciation, which makes comments such as yours really valuable. Keep commenting, por favor. Smile.

Claudia: Thank you for your kind words. We do our best with what we are given—hahahaha. Do comment often! Big grin.

Oh, Karen, thanks for commenting but I do so want you and JudyB to be incorrect about Lupe. Can't he just live out his old age being a surrogate grandfather and dating a hot Ramona?

Cara Vivi: You are so welcome. I am glad you enjoyed the recap. I love your novel idea—get a PA system, et it up in the Plaza and hand the mike to Lupe, and, I'll add Ramona before she leaves town. Great concept—Will you contact the monkeys with this idea?

La Paloma: I would love a nice fruit basket from the monkeys, as long as it wasn't overripe. Heehee. Thanks so much for your comment.

EJ
 

Amiga Novela Maven:

Your perspective has great merit when viewed from the frame of randomness. I cannot disagree with you.

Imagine, instead, that I wrote from the other interpretation of the 'Infinite Monkeys Theorem'——probability. I pose that it would only take seven monkeys with seven machines a finite time period to come up with this LIMITED story. In my universe, the endless cliches you mention belong to the world of the telenovela and are a given and the product placements pay for the show's extension. Pity the poor monkeys who have to write with those stock elements in place.

As to the travel bureau promotion for the Yucatan, you may have me on that one.

I must admit that my hypothesis— although admittedly not given the careful scrutiny required by the scientific method, was sure fun to write about.

I love the idea of Flo delivering one of Fluffy's soliloquies. I LOL at the thought. Of course, a soliloquy written for Fluffy would have to be dumbed-down in order for Flo to deliver it.

I loved your comments, dear Maven.

EJ
 

Julia:

So glad you got a kick out of the recap. ITA about Paloma, JUST GO. We know that gives us a few more weeks where Ramona, who knows the key secrets, is unavailable to help our dear Guadalupe spread the news, by PA or by Begoña, whichever is more efficient.

Smiles.

EJ
 

NM:

You naughty girl! 'Gabino self-peppered'—this killer comment made me LOL.

EJ
 

I think DZ looks better with facial hair. It hides his little mouth.

It was so funny seeing how Chente now towers over Gabino. The kid really has had a growth spurt.
 

Valgame Dios! It's an Abismo de Tontería!

elna june - what can I say that has not already been posted here? Excellent reCRAP, great snark, and I'm relieved that I'm not the only person who had the same reaction to this episode. Your comments on Carito are spot-on.

"... the writing, typing, and story-running monkeys screech, scream and insult one another, pelting one another with the rotten fruit that covers the floor of their large office."
Errrr.... we know what else (besides food) monkeys like to fling, so now we know how this story has been inspired. 'nuff said.

I couldn't hear all of Paloma & Flor's conversation due to microwave & tea kettle, so I dubbed in my own ---
Paloma: Flor, you're my new BFF. You never dated, slept with, or got engaged to the only man I love who is also the father of my child, tho he doesn't know it.
Flor: Paloma, Ditto.
 

I have to say it again, the posts here are just hilarious. You all are the funniest people in the world. Thanks for brightening up another gloomy day in Ohio.
 

Julia - "Just go, Paloma." Lol That's funny.

Unfortunately, if everyone who irritated us in this tn left, we'd have a skit with Lucio and Lolita. Oh wait, we've seen that already.
 

I felt so bad for Tonia when Braulio and Chente wouldn't stay for dinner. After she stocked up on 47 bags of chips!
 

Thanks, Elna June, very impressive and very clever. Seven monkeys, who knew?

I thought of you when I saw the girl with the headband. I, on the other hand, am a sucker for girls and ladies in headbands.

Padre Lupe and Carmina are so great together and everyone else is so boring that I've taken the liberty to reserve a temporary table for the fans of this uniquely entertaining couple. Forbidden Love Cocktails will be served. Pistols or shotguns optional but recommended.

Carlos
 

Carlos:

Friends though we are, we will never agree on the headband question. I am completely predictable in my reaction to this fashion accessory. It may be a reaction to my hippie years where headbands did abound.

Amigo, I am THERE at your table for Carmina and 'Lupe, Glock in handbag. Please pour me a tall Forbidden Love Cocktail.

I propose a toast to actors who share great chemistry.

Slainte!

EJ
 

Yes, it was our Carlos, and only Carlos, who appreciated Matilde's headband.
 

I wore a headband just like Matilde's for my (private, just me) Cuando Me Enamoro finale viewing party, and it was SO UNCOMFORTABLE. Grettell Valdez is a heck of a trooper to wear one for so many months.

As a hater of hair in my face, I can appreciate a good headband, but there are good ones and bad ones. I kinda like the hippie look.
 

Lol! We did have great CME themed costume parties, didn't we. I'm afraid I can't fit into any La Ermita clothes. Maybe Ramona's hat.
 

EJ, we now have answers....""Don't think of this show as having a PLOT!" shrieks the Alfa Fluffy as he capers around the room, taking control of the group firmly. "Think of this as... as...a soup, stone soup in which we can throw in any ingredient, bring it to a boil and then watch as it evaporates away, meaningless." Leave it to you to boil the entire duration of our beloved, "Abismo de Pasion" down to one adjective....."meaningless!" Thanks, now I can relax and enjoy the Ulitmas Semanas" acting vignettes without any expectations!!!! EJ, your creativity is LIMITLESS!

Daisy, your posts about young women and the circumstances of the Pal/Gall relationship have been so ON TARGET. Thanks, thanks, thanks amiga, I so agree!

Now I know why Dr. T, a mujeriego, , ironically, gets to dress down Begoñia, the novela writing was influenced by an alpha male monkey, Fluffy!

Great recap, great comments all day! Welcome new posters.
 

What a lovely recap! Loved it!

So is it the finale yet? Because it's just getting too crazy in La Ermita.

The best scene was Begoña's habañero face AND DZ's wet bare chest. Regarding that girl hitting on Dam in the bar...don't waste your time, girl! He's taken!
--TF
 

Thank you so much for the funny recap.

And, speaking of funny . . .

. . . What was that crazy little dance (on those skinny chicken legs) Begonya was doing, as she snuck up to Enrique?

. . . Delores asking Elisa if she used protection on the beach. HAH! Where was Elisa going to get protection? It's not like she could stop at a pharmacy . . . oh, wait. Nevermind.

. . . Ramona was a hoot in the last scene, pretending that her horse has the flu. After 131 episodes of being the cranky assed voice of doom, Ramona finally gets to yuk it up.
 

You are so right about those comedic outputs. Begonia's almost flirty walk behind her son was bizarre. She is such a good actress. Probably my favorite character to watch in The Pit.
 

Maybe Begonia is going bonkers with the extension of this telenovela, and is trying to hang on to her sanity by the silly dance.

Same with Ramona and her horse with the flu.

What else can the cast & Viewerville do at this point, with this tontería, but laugh? :-D
 

Thanks, EJ, for the usual delicious dish-up. Favorite lines not already dwelt upon by your other fans:

- Gabino walks down the entry walk of Hacienda Arango to find his bastard son Vicente (emphasis on the 'bastard') sitting at the fountain.

- So Carito, our monkey-given aging sexpot is plopped into the show, as though she is the very plot element that can bring everything together and end the show with a bang. Well, simians, it isn't working.

- Ramona comes running in with a story—she has to see a man about a horse. A sick horse. A horse with a cough. She cannot leave tonight! It works for me, Ramona…

BTW, the actress who plays Carito is FIFTY-FREAKIN-TWO. I have arranged for her stylist to come by the patio later and give us all some tips. Three a.m. okay? Under the Forbidden Love Table?

 

R la O, we will of course *have* to dress up for the Abismo finale. I think I have some crocheted potholders I can stitch together...or maybe I'll just festoon myself with unraveling yarn, since that seems to be the way it's all going.
 

EJ, I hope you are still reading comments! I tried writing yesterday but got interrupted and it was left on the screen.

OMG, I can't tell you what an idiot I looked like at my daughter's piano lesson, reading your LOL funny recap and trying not to guffaw out loud and grinning like an IDIOT at all your funny lines! The parts about reading the centerfold article on parenting and re-watching the Dam in a towel scene. You are just wicked funny!!!

I also loved your rant and perfect insight onto the Carita character. QTH?! She's going to wrap up the entire show by being Doc's girlfriend, the catalyst to getting Maru and Lucio back together and the one character to finally dupe Carmina? Wow.

When I started reading your recap, I thought NovelaMaven had written it which, I think, is the highest praise there is! :)

You rock, EJ!

Katy
 

I now have this hilarious mental image of the horse lolling back limply, with the back of its front hoof on its forehead and wadded up used tissues discarded all over the floor, coughingly pitifully. "Neeeigh, can't travel...*cough*...too...sick...*cough*"
 

Hi, Sandy:

I am so glad you enjoyed the recap. We are in Ultimas Semanas so its time to ramp up the energy, isn't it? If the show doesn't provide proper excitement then I guess we will have to amp it up ourselves.

Thanks again for your lovely comment. This completes how many shows you and I have watched together—I cannot remember!

Hugs,

EJ
 

All:

R la O and Julia have both mentioned the themed goodbye parties we had (individually) for CME. Perhaps we can concoct something similar for Abismo.

Going with the sartorial themes presented in AdeP—Plaid, linen mom-khakis, Alfie's stylish outfits with one thousand different belts, Lupe's ascot, deep cleavage floor length dresses as worn by Antonia, knock-off Herve Leger bandage dresses as worn by Florencia, Paolo's Etro-knock-off custom fitted shirts, Gabino's hand bandana or head bandage, or, last but certainly not least, Elisa's short=shorts, abundant wrist jewelry, cat blanket vests and cowboy boots. Really, the possibilities abound.

After putting together our 'fits, we can get ourselves photographed for our new Fall Season 2012 avatars.

When the show lags in the next few weeks, we can just turn to our pads and paper and doodle costume possibilities.

What do you think?

EJ
 

TF and Anon:
Thanks for your kind comments. It sure is fun to write these recaps and I am glad that others enjoy my twisted sense of humor. Big grins.

Blue and Katy:
You are too kind (recapper blushes) with your words. Thank you very much.

Julia: The picture you paint of the horse with the catarrh made me LOL. Where does that horse live, by the way?

EJ
 

I definitely have the mom khakis and the mom derriere to go with it. My final party outfit is good to go!
 

EJ, right now I will commit to wearing a plaid shirt, khaki shorts instead of short shorts, flip-flops instead of cowboy boots, and a bandana of some sort, tied around head or hand TBD. No doilies, sorry*. (*lie)

Let's see...to drink I could do a tequila or mezcal, or wine right out of the bottle a la Carmina. In fact, I'm getting rid of some old wine glasses so I could even do a glass and smash with a hiss and a curse. I'm starting to get into the spirit now!
 

Katy:

To be taken for my friend Novela Maven is a distinct pleasure. Now THAT is a compliment for any recapper. NM is as good as it gets!

EJ
 

I'll get to work on my Gran Final outfit right away, but I don't think I'll be able to top the off-the-shoulder red number and false moustache I wore for CME.
 

Oh, goody, Silvia and JudyB:

I am thinking of painting a svelte body in short=shorts on top of the floor length cover up I wear when I get out of the pool. Think I'll fool anybody?

Heeheehee...

EJ
 

Blue:

You have a ways to go to outdo yourself on that one. The mustache must have been particularly attractive.

Get cracking, girl!

EJ
 

Oh, and of course I will cry. I will feel sorry for myself too. And I will insist I am alone in the world. Now if only there was a cenote nearby.

I need a belt buckle!!

Blue Lass, I know it doesn't seem possible that you could outdo yourself, but I think you owe it to yourself and to us to try.

EJ, I do believe I have a shirt very much like what you describe. It it particularly effective in photographs, you know those picture thingies that always seem to surprise us when we look at them?
 

Katy:

I am enormously flattered that you thought I might have written this brilliant recap. As if ...

What to wear, what to wear ... well I have asked my modista to fashion a toasty, golden velour full-body habanero suit. I will wear it with green leggings and cap, of course. [On Halloween, I will fill out the baggy dimensions of the habanero with an armature of chicken wire and go trick or treating as a nice, round pumpkin.]
 

Novela Maven, dear amiga, I have but one word for you...TOPPER!! Leave it to you dress up like a habanero, bwahahahaaa.
 

Snort!!!
 

I am away for about three days with lots and lots of work and see all the fun i missed!!!
EJ, you are a master at your craft .. just look at all the great stuff you pulled out of this MISERY of an episode!!

(I think these two should just get horizontal and be done with it. What great chemistry the actors have together! I love their scenes—they are a much hotter couple than Elisa and Damian). ITA!! Also loved ‘from the sublime to the ridiculous’… indeed!.

Btw, Braulio is not renting, he gave the old owner the ‘down payment’ from his bonus/dividends check so he is buying to ‘own a home’ for first time in his life.

Daisynjay… And Chente should have never made it out of that kidney transplant ( and the point of that was?????) <>

JudyB, Damian, low-riding towel, leaning into the mirror. What a fine fellow he is when he's not saying or actually doing anything!) … LOL! I hear ya!

I too share the bad feeling about Padre Loopy not getting to his next birthday… daisynjay, Padre Loopy keeps telling Gael about Paloma, I agree that these monkeys are setting up for Loopy’s death to set up Gael to ‘fulfill his last request’ and marry Paloma.

What did Lucio write for Stefie’s epitaph? ‘I had to stop them’… or ‘you all are clueless’.?

he'll eventually do the right thing, marry you and everyone will be all smiles ( at least until the Finale is over and we won't see the ugly reality afterwards.) … I totally agree, Daisynjay… they should put a warning on screen ‘don’t try this at home.. it doesn’t work’

EJ, totally agree that Elisa stuffing that habanero into BeGoneYa’s foul mouth was a long overdue and enjoyed treat. I would LOVE to see BeGoneYa’s lips the next morning.

I can just imagine after the 'FIN' shows up we get a credit skid like the one at the credits of Evan Almighty, where everyone goes crazy 'EVERYBODY DANCE NOW!!!' and we see some crazy stuff like Carmina and Loopy popping up on the bed together, Augie popping up from his grave a la Thriller and everyone dancing in line after BeGoneYa's chicken legs... with Loopy wearing a paid shirt and jeans, Elisa wearing Nina's dresses, Lucio bumping rear ends with Carito, etc etc...

Could you all imagine someone coming to visit and the epitaphs they would read in the 'camposanto'?
i wonder what Rosie would have done with the young foursome if he lived...
 

Post a Comment



<< Home

Newer›  ‹Older

© Caray, Caray! 2006-2022. Duplication of this material for use on any other site is strictly prohibited.

Protected by Copyscape Online Plagiarism Finder