Caray, Caray!

NM---WOWEE..Thanks for that excellent retelling. Are you sure that you are not writing romance novels under some catchy pseudonym ? That was quite a recap.

I only got to see the first half of this episode... Since we have only one small TV in ourB&B room, I interrupted the Phillies game to watch a smidgen. Then, I relinquished the TV to good sport Hub. While he was watching Mercedes and the local sex workers, Hub asked ..." Isn't she a little OLD to be a hooker?"..."Is that girl with the knife telling her...'This is my spot.' ?" Sorry I missed the Twin sighting, but the Phillies won.

As I look out at the sea, I am scanning the horizon for Captain Dam's fishing boat, but so far...just tourist boats looking for dolphins and whales....and bikined beach lasses. There is a retreat for nuns here named "Saint Mary by the Sea. I smiled when I saw it and thought of R-Laydee. Life imitating art.
 

Aw shucks, Susanlynn. I'm just following the lead of my fellow recappers and Patio peeps. Think of it as a Harlequin Romance built by a committee. (Or maybe Harlequin Romances ARE built by a committee?)
hehehe.

Oh and hey everyone, the Limerick Contest is open to all! [Careful, you folks in the back row. Let's keep it clean. :D]
 

Fantástico NovelaMaven
Neither Nora Roberts nor Jackie Collins could have equaled your recap. Dam didn't have time to rip Marina's bodice, ¡maldita sea!

I see Monica Miguel's hand in this, commandant Robles is way more astute than Mejia's usual cops.

Do you think Jazmin could really still be a virgin? oh right, this is a TN

 

Dear Novela Maven:

Although you have written many a recapping masterpiece, today's recap is surely in your top ten. From the perfect, serious tone of the romance novel in the first paragraphs, to the fabulous retelling of this capitulo with great headlines in the body of the work, this is a brilliant recap. No, that is not hyperbole; my vocabulary of words of praise is simply unequal to the task of adequately complimenting both the author of this retelling and her production itself.

Wonderful writing, dear Maven. Over the next couple of days I will surely pick out my favorite bits and pieces, but right now, I will savor the whole.

Thank you for doing all the work involved in writing such a delightful story. It is pitch perfect and letter perfect, a very difficult art to master when one only has a few hours to turn around a piece of writing. I'll bet JudyB., our former journalist, will LOVE and appreciate this work.

Gracias, NM. It is an honor to be working with you and the others on this writing team.

In admiration,

Elna June


 

Now that we've had a twin sighting, is there any chance that Dirty Maggie will get cleaned up and high jinx will ensue as FabDam mistakes her for Marina ?

As for Dumba$$ Dam marrying nasty Pester in the first place, I keep thinking of something someone in my real life said to me..., "He makes really bad decisions." An alternate title for this episode might be "I Don't Want to Tame This Shrew." Marry in haste, repent in leisure, Dam. Enjoy the screaming hissy fits, Matey. 198 uoomto
 

To echo Variopinta...Do you think Marina could still be a virgin ? Oh, right, this is a tn .
 

OK, now a comment on Cap 20 content. Your title is wonderful, NM, I love that you picked it out of the actual dialog of the show. And while I have worried about Tia Becky in the past, I now see her as a bit of a lush and a born romantic. She has an edge, though. Perhaps she should wear just one shark tooth around her neck. Hee hee.

But you have to love that she is no snob. Making friends with the HWAHOG (Hooker With A Heart Of Gold) Candy shows that she is no respecter of persons.

This instant friendship will surely advance the plot. Gossipy Tia Becky can get all the down and dirty on the town's inhabitants and blurt out the factoids at just the in-opportune moment. Always in the throes of drink, of course...They are going to have fun with this plot thread, I predict. And Nora is doing a great job as Tia Tiberon.

EJ
 

Thanks, Variopinta! And I'm glad to see that you appreciate Comandante Robles too. He IS smarter than the average novela bear!

I'm perfectly happy to believe that Jaz is still virgo intacta. Hey, Susanlynn, Marina too. Why not? As Vario points out, Marina's bodice never did get ripped. At least not last night.

My dear Elna June,
You have raised the bar with your brilliant work. I am just trotting along trying to keep up with you. I am thrilled that you enjoyed the recap. [This show is so much fun to watch -- and even more fun to write about.]
 

Susanlynn:

Your holiday sounds delightful and I am happy for you that the Phillies won.

You made me giggle with the alt. title, "I Don't Want To Tame This Shrew." Loved that.

NOTE: Following is just speculation. No spoilers frome me, ever.

This whole twins thing is a set up for Damian to have an affair with the wrong twin. Mistaken identity, romps in the hay with the dusty Magdalena, these devices seem perfectly in order in our beloved genre. Good Call, Susanlynn!

EJ


 

Elna June,

Tía Tiburón (or should that be "Tiburona"?) may wear a single shark's tooth if she likes. But only our star-crossed lovers get to wear caracoles. Y punto. :)

And oh yes, Nora is a wonderful Aunt Becky. Actually, I've never seen her turn in a bad performance.
 

This was so funny. Especially, the romance novel description of their make out. That was awesome.

Cynderella
 

NovelaMaven- I was blushing reading your first few paragraphs. *fanning myself*

Dam is as delusional as Estercita if he thinks he's going to rid himself of his barnacle of a wife easily. He knew what he was getting himself into. Now let's see how he tries to extract himself from Pestercita.

Meanwhile, Mayuya has decided to take Estercita's place in her parents' home. She better hope Fully isn't looking for a new punching bag. He was certainly having a lot of fun making his baby-mama's life hell. Laz and the Pest are hermanos. I guess it makes a certain amount of sense that she's on the boat in Laz's place right now.

Tia Becky and Candy...I see those two having lots of fun together.

I was very impressed with the Federales. I hope they contact JazLu's parents and get her back to them right away. Do they know where her sister is?
 

Dang it NovelaMaven, I haven't got past the first two paragraphs and I'm muttering to myself "This wicked lady is making gobs of money writing bodice rippers on the side". Hope you are, 'cause you got the chops, mujer.

As examples:

The captain's cabin seems too small to contain all the longing, all the barely suppressed desire.

the virile perfection that is his shoulder

a tremulous sylph, who who would happily be his captive

And just so we don't forget that this is our snarky NovelaMaven writing.....

his bride of fifteen minutes

Mercy, mercy, mercy, you're batting a thousand with this one.(When do you not?)Now I'm going to read the rest of the recap and then gush shamelessly some more. Can't help it, lady, you've got a lethal pen in that pocket.
 

Anyone notice that every bit of Magda was grimy, except her perfectly manicured shiny nails? The same manicure Marina has. LOL!

They may not use Magda as a stand-in lover for Dam. She may be used like MJ's twin in Sortilegio-- to create confusion and to make everyone think Marina has died, when it's really Magda who had died.

I'm glad she's homeless (and possibly mentally ill) instead of a prostitute. We already have enough of those in this tn.
 

NovelaMaven:

Fantastic recap! I'm with Susanlynn, do you write bodice rippers on the side under another name?

I just knew the Commandante had brains. So glad he took that beer bottle and will look up her prints. He is already sure though, having seen her pic. I hope he does all he can to free Jaz and the other poor girl.

Mercedes really lives close to the edge. Lucky for her those other girls stepped up and helped her out. She always meets the hookers with the heart of gold. And the call of the blood was singing to Mercedes, too bad she didn't see Maggie. I think Maggie is gonna be way different from Marina and personally I don't think that DamFab is gonna mix them up!

CE can menace so well. I love this actor! That voice is just so, mellow and menacing. No wonder he has the nickname "The Voice". He is rattling Rosario's cage, but then she rattled his right back!

Tia Becky is a hoot. Love how she struts into a room and takes it over. I think Candy and she will be good friends.

DamFab and Marina, sigh! Stuck with two people they really can't stand. I feel for DamFab, he can't get away from Pester on that boat, but Marina is lucky, once she gets off the speedboat she can leave Herny on the pier ; )
 

susanlynn said

Now that we've had a twin sighting, is there any chance that Dirty Maggie will get cleaned up and high jinx will ensue as FabDam mistakes her for Marina ?

Oh right, I think the last time Mejia used that one was La Usurpadora. He is reaching in the bottom of his cliche bag.

I hope The Shrew isn't tamed, she is fun to watch, although you might have to lower the volume.
 

I couldn't get beyond the first paragraph. "pulling her against his chiseled chest, engirdling her in his manly muscular arms" and "shrewish bride ...and indefatiguable suitor" had me already smiling in pure delight

"his tight white pants now dry and snug, his manly muscular arms akimbo" and "He holds her, a tremulous sylph, one who would happily die his captive"??? Beyond sensational. I vote with Elna June - in the top five of your finest for sure. ITA that our dear Judy will highly approve!

Dam's kisses looked so fabulous they are definitely worth mentioning. And sighing over. Again.

Seeing Magdalena, living in filth and abject poverty was very sad. Will she be found in time for a rags to riches story and a happy ending? I wonder...

Variopinta, Robles is a refreshing change from the usual less-than-top notch law enforcement officials in most TNs. I thought him finding out about Jaz's background would take months. I'm impressed. That said, I still wish he would stop focusing on Jaz - what about Rosario?? She's available and appears to need protection from Fully. Seems like an ideal match.

I like Ximena/Marina. When she stood in the boat looking back at Dam, you could see her pain. She is doing a great job and think she was perfectly cast. She isn't overly emotional and although a little cool and held back, think that is totally in keeping with the character.

When I grow up (ha), I want to be Becky. Self assured, confident, fearless. Love the way she entered the bar, made herself right at home and instantly made a new friend! And, amazingly, she is nice and seemingly without an outsize ego...

"¡Eres mío, sólo mío!" Ack. Nothing like vowing to take possession of someone who not only doesn't love you but appears can barely stand the sight of you and cringes at your touch. What a look of disdain DamFab gave Esthercita. I would have shriveled up completely. E still didn't get a clue...Susanlynn, your I Don't Want to Tame This Shrew" was on the money!!

Thanks again NovelaMaven. What a Saturday treat.

Diana
 

Too funny Vivi
"Anyone notice that every bit of Magda was grimy, except her perfectly manicured shiny nails? The same manicure Marina has. LOL!"



 

Gush Alert! I'm back.

Neptune's murky maws

(...SWAT team on speed dial)

Aggro-Prosti

a sore loser and an ungracious winner

protest of the pest

soupçon of prissy
soupçon of sulky

[Really, voice-over guy? Have you ever seen a telenovela?]

Savored every tidbit (can you tell it's time for lunch?) and also appreciated "el mismo que viste y calza" because that expression has always seemed rather mysterious to me.

Now can't wait to watch it. Should be fun. The recap sure was.
 

Vivi/Madelaine and Judy: We were writing/posting at the same time.

Vivi,I couldn't tell if Mag was never in the "life" or if she was and then left, descending into poverty. You say the former, so that is good enough for me.

Judy, we are on the same wavelength. I mentioned several of your favs and agree "his bride of 15 minutes" was great...

Madelaine, "I think Maggie is gonna be way different from Marina and personally I don't think that DamFab is gonna mix them up!" That would be my preference. Will be fun to see how this works out.

Diana
 

Sorry everyone, been busy all week. But thanks everyone for the recap. Elna June, glad to hear that your son is doing well. Great job on the recap Novela Maven! Very detailed as always.

Now that Magdalena is found to be alive, I hope that when Mercedes find her she doesn't turn out to be an evil twin sister. I am praying to the telenovela gods Magdalena doesn't turn evil. I can deal with her being angry at her mother and sister for the hard life she has led, but I hope the writers don't do a whole evil twin thing where Magdalena tries to kill her sister and steal Damian from her. Mayuya and Estercista is enough.


 

NM---WOWEE, just to echo Susanlynn. Did it just get hot in here or is that me? Or is that a device used to keep Damian shirtless. Vivi--may I borrow your fan? Wish UA was on this thread, she has a lot of fans.

Too funny. You did the Boddice-Sans Ripping scene justice. If this were straight reportage, we'd all be holding up TMI signs on the patio.

Glad to see these are thinking policemen in evidence without it being a trafficking of women-cop show. Oh! It IS! CapDamFab is just a diversion to keep us ladies watching.

From the way Marina has behaved so far, even at age, say, 25-27, she could conceivably still be a virtuous virgin. She was all business at the hotel. We didn't see her with any eligible men, but maybe that will still be revealed.

We know Pestercita isn't. The way she threw herself at Dam, drunk tho' she was, I suspect she'd done more than watch telenovelas for suitable techniques.

I never expected Fulgie to come right out and boast of his affair with Rosie and not denying Lazaro is his so soon. I thought it would have to be dragged out of him and require DNA testing, as poor Concho is facing in QBA half-way through the tn.

Here is *my* challenge: FULGENCIO IS WORSE THAN POND SCUM. Since I'm no poet, please, someone turn this into a meaningful (or not) limerick.

Not sure I like Magda showing up so soon. Don't like all the directions this could go in. Don't like anyone messing with Damian's feelings for Marina. Did not notice the fingernail polish. What a hoot.

So, 'Nan and Pester did not get to see The Goodbye Kiss. If we hadn't seen the firey avances, I would have thought that would keep them apart for several episodes.

Pestercita just can't get any better. Kudos to LC.

Wonder how Damian will avoid doing what he's supposed to do on his wedding night--and whether we get to see him succeed. Wonder if Pestercita will lie about it happening if it didn't.

So, here is Anita, breathily signing off for awhile. Got more figs to process--going to make chutney.

 

Oh, and where are they going to live? On the boat?
 

Maybe once Magda is found and polished up, she and Hernan can get together and he'll leave Marina alone. Although, I don't think I'd wish Hernan on anyone, not even if Magda turns out to be an evil twin. She didn't look evil though. Just down and out.

Diana- The pimp who threatened Mercedes when she had the Federales arrest him (Papi), said that Magda had escaped from the trafficking house, and he has sworn to get back at her for it. And now he's also sworn to get back at Mercedes. I think we haven't see the last of that guy. Just like our beanies allow for us to believe Jaz has been captive for a year, and still hasn't had to "service" any clients, I'm going to believe that Magda escaped before Papi could pimp her out.
 

The 1st 2 photos are our
hunkísimo dulce

http://www.peopleenespanol.com/gallery/fotos-famosos-en-twitter-3?xid=pespdaily08242013
 

P.S. Those Camera pens are also available as Recording pens--work up to 6' away.

The taxi driver who came for Mercedes is the one that in an early episode, promised to help Mercedes any way he could. I think he was the same one.

Sorry, no nail polish, just a manicure.


 

Variopinta- Thanks for the link to those pics. WL looked very cute with the kids, but did you notice pic #4-- Aaron Diaz (aka the Belt Buckle) with his adorable baby daughter in the pool.
 

OK:

I need a plot point correction. Just what is Jose's role in Bea's house? I somehow missed how he ends up driving Miss Mercy AND hanging out at Bea's. Please clear up, anyone.

Of course, I am hoping to hear from our Vivi, she of the eidetic memory.
Grin.

EJ
 

NM, a fabulous recap! Loved the purple prose farewell summary and the soupçon of prissy and soupçon of sulky, among other gems.

You're right about Tia Becky--Nora Salinas is always great.

 

Cyn,
I'm glad you got a few chuckles from this.

Vivi,
Maybe Urban can be persuaded to lend you one of her fans. Or better yet, maybe we can find ourselves a fan supplier for the Storm Cellar™ -- there are a lot of people on the Patio who seem to need a bit of cool air.

JudyB,
When a recap of mine gets your seal of approval, I am immensely honored. But it is worth repeating -- this is an example of Group Think at its best. Nevertheless, I thank you for your lovely words, my dear.

Mads,
Do I write bodice-rippers on the side? Ha! This was my first stumbling attempt. You think there's a future in it? [snort]

Diana,
Weekends on this page have certainly gotten livelier since you got plugged in at home. But do you seriously see a Rosario-Robles pairing? I'm sorry for Rosario but she seems like such a sourpuss. I'd rather see Robles with, say, Candy. :)

Caroline,
I'm also hoping we aren't headed for EvilTwinVille -- poor Mercedes has had enough tsuris for a lifetime. But let us trust in the writers. [Oh my. Did I just say that?]
 

EJ- Jose works for Mercedes, not Bea. His job is to keep an eye on Marina, take care of her and help her out with any problems she has, and to help her and her mother settle in. He's been making Marina's life easier by keeping her mother occupied and accompanying her about town, and he also many times drives Marina around. Not sure what job title that would have. I wish I had one of him though. :)
 

Oh, and Jose also packs heat! He pulled his gun on the town police chief when he held his gun to DamFab's head, and wouldn't back down till the POLICE chief put down his gun. What a man.

Now, I want to see Tia Becky loosen him up a bit and bring some fun into his life. Hanging out with Bea all day, and being at Mercedes' beck and call, has got to be a bit boring for a young, verile man like him.
 

Vivi:

Jose's work sounds a bit like a really good old-fashioned "wife" job description.

I want a wife like Jose too. Especially if I can have one with dark smouldering good looks.

Shall we put up and ad, "Old fashioned wives wanted," and look for one here in the San Francisco area and one in DC?

I bet there will be several others on Caray who might like such an employee.

Now for the final test, Does Jose do windows?

Vivi, thanks amiga mia.

EJ



 

NM, Of course you are correct, Tia Tiberona!

EJ

 

EJ- I don't know if he does windows, but we have seen him make tea for the ladies, and get wine for Tia Becky. That's enough for me! When shall we put out the ad? ;-)
 

Anita,
"FULGENCIO IS WORSE THAN POND SCUM."
So true. And yet I was happy to see him turn the switch from choleric to sardonic in this episode. I mean I know he's just acting but those rages must be quite a cardio workout and I want this actor to be around for a very long time.

Where will the newlyweds live? Maybe PesterDam will move in with Dam's madrina, Eusebia. She KNOWS things, including, perhaps, how to tame a shrew.

Elna June,
Concerning José, I mentioned once before that I believe he has the best hair on the show. BTW -- Wives packing heat? Really? I thought Carlos was the one who lived in Texas. Now I'm really confused.

La Paloma,
So glad you enjoyed the wallow in the very worst prose I could conjure up. It was a fun exercise.
 

For EJ (who should never take NM's pedantic musings seriously. That is to say, almost never.)

Tía Tiburona tía Tiburón
She sways with the music
And never drinks alone
 

Thank you so much for the recap. How did you make romantic cliches sound so marvelously, refreshingly cheesy when applied to His Hotness DamFab and PrissyMissy?

I am just going to safely assume that all the good girls and good boys are virgins (yes, it includes Commandante Robles, bless that unusually acute for his advanced age eyesight).

Pester is following every delusional bride's script, "He is a bad boy now but I will change him when we are married." Oh Pester, you will not learn.

Will Madge be dirty, hot, sexy, and deliciously unstable? Opposite of the Prissygoodness? Or just dirty and unstable?

Again, thank you for fabulous recap. Until Monday.
 

Welcome back, Vita!

"I am just going to safely assume that all the good girls and good boys are virgins"

Hmm. I detect a flaw in your logic. Isn't DamFab the best boy of all?

:)
 

Dearest NovelaMaven,

He is the virgin of the heart.
 

"He is the virgin of the heart."

You're not wrong, dude.

:)
 

Vivi: Thank you for the info!

"P.S. Those Camera pens are also available as Recording pens--work up to 6' away" - Anita, am placing my order immediately.

NovelaMaven, no - I honestly don't see the Commandante and Rosario at all. :) I would like to pair him with someone else because he seems nice but honestly? To get him off of Jaz's back...not that I'm a huge Laz fan. I don't think the problem is Jaz - it's Laz with his rather dull and uninspiring personality.

Elna June, I do windows so Jose wouldn't necessarily have to ;)

Diana
 

Juan in FELS went the 40 year old virgin 10 years better.
 

I must say José is looking good, he has definitely been working out since PESE, he was the father of Helena's son.
 

Vario--Except for lacking the fashionista rimless glasses, Jose is a dead ringer for Mauricio (LVO) and the two tns were done 7 years apart. He was my number one telenovio until I saw Juan Soler, then I dropped him for Jorge Salinas, then forgot all about Jorge when Cristian came along. Fernando? Who is Fernando????

Call me fickle, but I'm a sucker for a pretty face (and chiseled chest, manly muscular arms, soft, generous lips,and virile perfection). Sweet William has what it takes to make me forget all of them (except Cristian).
 

Juan Soler doesn't look Latin enough for me, same with Guy Ecker.

Is that Mauricio Islas? Noooo, he competed with my numero uno, Colunga in Amor Real.

Can't agree more on CdlF, !!! Add Marcelo Córdaba to my list.

Interesting how different looks appeal to people, gracias a Dios!

I decided that WL was too young for me, so I have designated him for my stepdaughter. She's happy with that.

LVO???
 

Hilarious, NovelaMaven. Your writing is always so fresh and full of nifty surprises. You captured the ambiance of this episode perfectly. My favorite line:

"...he offers Marina a glass of sissy white wine, not realizing she is a tequila girl."

Excellent!

And thanks for the reassurance:

"The perfectly respectable and not at all creepy Comandante Robles..."

I was getting worried.

Vivi, when Magdelena reached for that cigarette, I thought that those nails looked a bit too well-cared for given her circumstances, and she uses the same nail polish as Marina... what are the odds?

I was expecting and hoping for some creepiness out of Hernán on the trip back with Marina but he behaved rather well.

Carlos
 

Vario--Arturo Carmona played an architect named Mauricio in LVO (La Verdad Oculta). It was a nice long presence, even though it was Big Ed who was the lead. Now, 7 yrs later he's Jose and hasn't changed a bit. I missed PESE.
 

Scam of the pond
Fulgencio has been bad
For reals; Ho Ho Ho
 

Look at these & tell me FC isn't the hottest

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7UY1rb5kJTE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7UhSEdIcgI

I know he is getting older but look how long Sean Connery was hot.
 

Carlos,
Thank you so much for your kind words. Yes, I did feel the need to speak for the good comandante. I felt he was being unfairly maligned in this space.

Vita,
You stepped up to Anita's POND SCUM challenge! And what a splendid haiku you have given us! Thank you. Fulgencio has indeed been bad. For reals.

:D
 

Fabulous NM!

Loved your title, the highlights at the beginning and your oh so Harlequin worthy description of our young, star-crossed lovers! I think you just wrote the book version of our TN!

I so loved that creepy, sort of terrifying scene where Maggie's hand creeps out for the cigarette. Nice job, writers!

OK here goes:

There once was a girl named Marina,
And a brat born by tired old Delfina,
They both loved the same guy,
Who can blame them? Not I!
He's well worth this tight fitting bean-ah!

Thanks, NM!

Katy
 

Delighted we have so many folks willing to have a go at the limericks or the haiku. Katy, I'm quite smitten by the line:

"and a brat born by tired old Delfina"

Must say, I far prefer the actress' dignified nun role in Alborada to this one. Sucks to be you, Delfina.


 

Katy, I liked your limerick. We are a bunch of folks who are up for any challenge !!!
 

Right back at you, Katy. Fabulous limerick!

They both loved the same guy,
Who can blame them? Not I!

Nor I!

Wow!

Yes, JudyB, the poor dolphin lady. Maybe there will be hope for her by the end of the story. Rebeca should take her to La Guacamaya some evening. She may have some moves she hasn't used in years.
 

Marvelous Katy!!!
 

OK. Here's my attempt at poetry, inspired by the pants.

WET, clinging to your rippling strong thighs

WHITE, transparent and dazzling to my eyes

PANTS, and heaves you inspire, and sighs

Oh captain, my captain, never let those pants dry!

 

Oh my, Vivi. I think it's getting a little warm here again.

What a gem! Who knew a pair of pants could inspire so much creativity? (Though chafing is a bit of a concern, don't you think?)
 

NovelaMaven- A manly man like Damian isn't concerned with a little chafing.
 

Hahaha! Genius, Viv! I wanted so badly to use "tight white pants" or "chiseled chest". Way to pull it off!;)

Katy
 

I wont be joining the limericks until I find a word that rimes with orange.
 

So there I was, minding my own business, hanging out on the second story roof of a yacht club (long story don't ask), doing a favor for a friend, braced against the wind but hunkered down and reading your recap on my Droid phone. I was laughing so hard that the club manager climbed up the ladder from the second story balcony to ask if I was all right. Seems the folks on the patio below, trying to enjoy the beautiful view, were a little concerned by the yelps and snorts coming from the roof. I blame the author.

Novela Maven, this was an astoundingly entertaining recap. You have outdone yourself. AGAIN! You are like the bottomless pit of scathingly brilliant.

I read the recap hours ago, didn't have a chance to read the comments, so now I'm going to relax and re-read your hot romance and enjoy everybody's hilarious responses. I know that every darn comment is going to be a gem.
 

Variopinta- Sporange. It's a rare alternative form of sporangium, a botanical term for a part of a fern or similar plant.

I await your submission. :)
 

Novela Maven, you know what might have given me one of the biggest laughs earlier today? Put-put-put. No, really, that absolutely and royally cracked me up.

That Mayuya concerns me a lot. Now that she doesn't have Pestercita to sabotage I feel like she is setting her sights on Delfina. She's turning out to be a nasty piece of work. Kudos to the actress for doing a fine job of over-the-shoulder-smirking.

"¡Eres mío, sólo mío!" sure brought back memories. What is it with these telenovela characters? They just want to own everything and everyone.

NM, I am impressed with your confidence in El Comandante. I do believe the writers are playing with us, making him out to be a perv when all the while he MIGHT just have a fatherly interest in Jazlu. We'll see.

That scene with Fulgencio and Rosario was just wonderful. [Someone on the Patio holds up a sign: TMI] OMG I was laughing so hard at that crack!

Anyhoo, all the other fave lines have been mentioned so I'll just reiterate I absolutely enjoyed the snip-snappy pace of this recap in addition to the content. Gracias y Gracias!

Great poems y'all! What a clever lot you are. No wonder the patio is always full.
 

Sylvia,
You are much too kind, amiga. I am so glad you got a few laughs from what I wrote. And believe or not, I KNEW you would get a kick out of put-put-put!

Of course I can't always predict what will tickle the Patio funnybone. A while back, one of my personal faves as a subhead, Eros doesn't live here anymore, just sank without a trace. I actually had to go to Mr. Maven for reassurance. He said he thought it was pretty funny. [But then he has to live with me so he might say anything to keep the peace]

Party on, Sylvia!
 

NM, how funny. That was your George Carlin recap, verdad? I do remember that, and how odd that none of us commented. We (as in we commenters, not you dear recapper) aren't always on the ball. I remember that because back in the day I very much liked the film Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore. But now I've dated myself. Hey, I was just a "kid" when that movie came out.

From now on when we don't pick up on one of your favorites you can chalk it up to the fact that there are so many wonderful lines we are bound to miss one occasionally.
 

Oh dear. Is my neurosis showing? I hate it when that happens.

[It WAS the George Carlin one. I can't believe that you know that.]




 

Oh I remember it well because I thought "Hmmmph, her title quote was better than mine!" You see, you're not the only kook on the patio. Oh wait that doesn't sound too great...Mesero! Another round for the patio! (Did my diversion tactic work?)

Speaking of the patio, I think we need to start having open mic poet's night at least once a week.
 

YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY KOOK ON THE PATIO

A perfect slogan for bumper stickers, sweatshirts, coffee mugs, TempeTippeeTequila cups -- the merchandising opportunities are endless.

(yeah yeah, the tactic worked. but then I'm easily distracted.)
 

A slogan we can all be proud of. I definitely want that on my TempeTippeeTequila Cup, a match made in heaven.
 

Vita--Did you want your three-liner published as SCAM OR SCUM?Either or both fit the creep.
 

This is a little late and a little lame, but here goes:

There was a young Limerist - Mad-laine
Who gave us a start down this lane—
Susan...complied
And no one can say that she lied.

 

Lest we forget, this was Susanlynn's limerick:

There was a young girl named Marina,
I wonder if you've ever seen 'er
She's in love with FabDam
Who's as sweet as a lamb
Crazed Hernan plays his fiddle to please her.

 

Anita, Not-Fully-Comprehencio strikes me more as scam with his indecent ways, but scum fits too.

While POND SCUM is descriptive, SCAM of the pond implies the intend.

Which one should I use?
A**hole, batsh*t, or badass?
Can't wait to decide!
 

Vita..I say use all three...unlike those who think less is more..I think more...is more.

Note to poetry contestants : Please do not play fast and loose with adjectives when creating your limericks. Example : using "wet, white chest / chiseled pants " instead of the original "wet , white pants/ chiseled chest."

Anita...The sad part of my limerick is that I actually turned on the light to jot it down right after I got into bed the first night of vaca.

Well, this is our last day of vaca. Getting ready for the tasty B&B breakfast on the porch. Then, we have to pack up...boohoo...goodbye sand, sun, surf...hello reality. After we take a walk at the beach , and I scan the horizon one last time for La Tempestad, I might pick up a souvenir for DamFab...the popular "sun's out, guns out" muscle teeshirt.

cap'n Sylvia..."put-put-put" was one of my faves , too. Simplicity.
 

Vita...maybe you could use " batsh*t bada$$ " and then find a great adjective to use with "a$$hole"....your editor, Susanlynn.
 

NovelaMaven - A snark artist and a romance novelist too? You're sure chockful of skills! What great fun it's been getting caught up through your recap.

Enjoying all the comments and poetry. Add me to the group that doesn't want to see Estercita become too tame. Her dancing at the groomless reception was hilarious. Did DamFab really think he could marry her without her demanding rights to his goodies?
 

Sweet William's new ATT comm, saw it this morn on ABC, GMA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bavtNZzO_NY
 

OK Vivi, you caught me, really a word that rimes with orange, I thought I was safe

There was a ship named Tempestad
They say it belonged to his Dad
With Fab Dam at the helm
Rough seas could not overwhelm


 

Well done Variopinta! :)
 

I just posted this link on the QBA comments, but thought since we are so appreciative of the male form on this line, some of you might appreciate it. These are the hunk Kraft Zesty commercials currently on tv: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6muBkNTgHn8
 

Vario and Vivi, thanks for the links. Mmmmmm...I just love a little beefcake and salad in the morning. My oh my. That perked me right up. Zesty!
 

You want beefcake, I'll give you beefcake. For mature audiences only
Google even gave a warning

Willy modeling underwear

http://hotwilliamlevy.blogspot.com/?zx=fc4543499b9fc27b
 

NovelaMaven - tan increíble! your recap was simply enthralling, and riotous! you knocked me off my patio chair in laughter, wonderment, and incredulity. just awesome awesome awesome. I so love a good laugh, as it is indeed the best medicine (for me). Thank you thank you thank you!
 

This is great! The poets keep coming out of the shadows!

Bravo, Anita and Variopinta! Definitely keepers, both.

Niecie,
Thanks for your nice words.
"Did DamFab really think he could marry her without her demanding rights to his goodies?"

Uh. yeah. It's not his brain that we love him for (which brain may very well be made out of chocolate.) :)

Shallowgal,
Oh wow, thank you. I'm glad you decided to join the party. What can I say? This show is a recapper's dream.
 

Okay, I have some limericks for the contest:

1. Wet White Pants

There once was a man in white pants
Who made ladies swoon with a glance,
A swim with the fishes,
Made him look more delicious,
When the water his charms did enhance.

2. Tight Pants and Fiddle

I met a young man named Hernán whose
Tight pants and fiddle were just too
Effete to be cool,
But beware of this fool!
He's a cold-blooded nerd with a screw loose.

3. The Parrot Squawks in English

Have you been to the joint Guacamaya?
If not then you really should try 'er
One beer or more
A turn round the floor
You can rent love, don't think you can buy 'er.
 

This is such a fun group; I enjoy the snarky comments and poetry.

For Estercita:

Ester the wife
Whether you like it or not
You Shall Not Pass!

For DamFab

The force is strong with
This one; she'll eat you alive
My pretty boy
 

NM what a wonderful Sunday diversion your recap was. I must echo others in praise of your romance moment. It was excellent and had me giggling like a little girl. And then you moved so well to other zingers and paragraph descriptions.

Vivi - great writing! And ITA about Pester not being easy to get rid of. Poor Dam, as Susanlynn noted did not think that one through and will suffer because of it. Oh and from a few days ago, you are so spot on about Pablo from AB being the best young galan ever and never sinking to saying unspeakable things to his one true love.

Tia Becky continues to amuse. Like Diana said, I want to be her when I grow up with her playfulness and confidence. I love her new found friendship with Candy and hope she and Jose have a love connection.

Anita & Variopinta thanks for your submissions ;)
 

And Vita thanks for your submission too.
 

Will-I-am the man
On this TN I play the captain
It will soon turn to shit
But I don't care a bit
'cause I'm más hot
& Hernán certainly is not
 

Well, folks, Vivi pointed out to me that I posted this limerick in the wrong place. Now, the folks at CI know that we here at LT have gone off our rockers.

There once was a wild child named Ester
Whose hate for Marina will fester
Hissy fits we will see
She won't let DamFab be
As Ester continues to pester.
 

There once was a girl named Estercita
who used to be a senorita
she trapped Fab Dam
who was on the lamb
but now he is stuck, pobrecita
 

Variopinta- Now you're on a roll! :)
 

Love all the poetry and limericks. I just have a second but here is a quick limerick offering

An unlucky woman, Delfina;
Whose daughter could hardly be meaner
But Mayuya as trade-in?
It's Hell she was made in.
Fulgencio's soul may be cleaner!

I'll return to catch up with you all later,
Hugs,

EJ
 

LOL! EJ. i loved your insightful limerick.
 

Susanlynn
I don't think anyone that watches CI (of which I am one) could call us off our rockers. You have to be missing a few marbles to watch that one.
 

There is a boy named Laz
Who is in love with Jaz
His mother still thinks he is a kid
And has kept the name of his father well hid
The big reveal is sure to add pizzazz
 

Dear all, I wish I had just a smidge of ya'll's wit and snark. what an entertaining, creative, eloquent bunch!
 

DamFab has a crew
And a wife who is a shrew
His one true love has the name of the sea
But sadly their love cannot be
Oh Boo!!!

 

These are fab-ulous. Instant classics. They will immediately be added to the Collected Works of LaTemp Contributors.

Some of the prose is worthy of enshrinement, too.

For instance:

Madelaine contributed a shortened Haiku-Like Onomatopoeically Alliterative One-Liner:

Fully truly is a blow hard bully


Vita’s comment was quickly turned into Free Form Poetry:

I was hit by a storm called WL
Thanks to Dancing With The Stars.
And now I am watching
the very first telenovela.

My IQ is dropping, dropping, dropping,
but the visuals are stunning.
That's the trade-off.

 

Anita!

O-kay.

Loved it.
 

JLo tribute to the tight wet white pants at 2:36

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgLcQmlN2Xg
 

too much JLo & not enough WL.

I'd go to the beach more often if that came out of the water.
 

I thought the exact same thing, V. it is her video after all. lol!!!
 

Well. It's been an exciting weekend on the Patio. How thrilling that so many of you have been inspired by this remarkable novela to try your hand at verse.

Patio Poets (e.g. EJ) and Poetasters (e.g. NM) -- We salute you! Keep them coming and keep them clean!
:D

Karen,
Thanks very much for the nice words.

"Tia Becky continues to amuse. Like Diana said, I want to be her when I grow up with her playfulness and confidence."

Hah. It's too late for me but maybe I can pretend that I WAS her when I was young. (My kids might even buy into it.) :)

Shallowgal,
Sooner or later you'll give in, put a lampshade on your head and start dancing on tabletops like the rest of us (i.e., you'll write some verse too) The Patio is patient.

BTW, a calligrapher is working on a collection of wall hangings featuring individual verses. They, along with the handsome leather-bound volume Anita has already described, will shortly be available in the Storm Cellar.™
 

OMG!!! Loved Loved Loved this recap.....I am reading this at work this Monday morning and wow It got HOT in here!!!! That was some sexy describing.
 

Hay una mujer named Delfin
Su hija is just plain mean
Con esposo much worse
It is a great curse
Su vida is in the latrine
 

Anon 11:24,
We do aim to please. :)

Variopinta,
O.M.G. In Spanglish, yet! Whoa!
(Eat our dust, Telemundo!)
 

Follow-up to NM news item.

The Storm Cellar™ has contracted with a genuine Chinese calligrapher to work on the collection of wall hangings featuring individual verses. Executed in finest vellum or rice paper, depending on your geographic orientation.
 

off the grid for the weekend and way late to the party, but WOW! NM, the recap... there are no superlatives adequate enough. Comments... HILARIOUS!!
So.much.fun!! I will work on a limerick...knowing the patio is patient:-)
 

Thanks so much, Ana! And do take your time.

Be one with the poetry.

:D
 

There was a young lady named Ester
Whose Daddy she always did Pester
Along came Damian
She said, "Now it's on!"
And forever turned into a jester
 

Excellent contribution, Ana. It sounds as though it came to you quite easily, not like some of us who are tortured by trying to make things rhyme to a beat.
 

...or was that Ana. I see it was anonymous. Please step up and own it, whoever.
 

Sorry - forgot to sign. Haven't posted in a while.
Soyyo (Anon 4:36)
 

Okay, I agree with Susanlynn. These limericks are addicting. Here's a couple more and then I quit. Promise.

A beautiful man named Damian
Whose temper was like a volcan
One day met Marina
Who liked the cantina
So he then had to be her guardian


There was a creep nerd named Hernan
Pastel pants he always did don
He tried for the princess
But only got winces
And still he refused to move on

Soyyo

 

Oh, Soyyo, Soyyo. Muy gracioso. Thank you for your contributions. I hope folks will stop by and read these. If not, never fear, they will be enshrined in the Collected Poems of LaTemp (to be published later as an Extra--which I seem to be addicted to compiling).