Monday, April 13, 2020

Me Declaro Culpable #40, 4/13/20: Fish Or Cut Bait, Nati, We're Sick Of Your Whining

Ugh and double Ugh.  Lots of unpleasantness in this one, including Tiziano's "whistle while you work" demeanor as he and his henchie fix up poor strangled Rufino to look like he hung himself.  Still whistling, Tizzy shuffles through his various papers till he finds the suicide note he concocted and leaves that on the prison cot.  The script looked quite elegant actually, way too refined for the poor wastrel that Rufino seemed to be. And then our macabre pair gaily exit the cell, having cheerfully wrapped up [no pun intended] all their work.  Yikes.

Elsewhere, Ingrid is giving her usual over-the-top academy awards performance as a distraught auntie learning her nephew has the same dreaded disease that killed her brother.  Doc, who first wanted to talk to Gabe's mom, but then settles for Ingrid, says the lad must start chemo as soon as possible.  This is a very aggressive malady.  More histrionics.


 Franco's Office

The mood is sunnier elsewhere.  Franco calls Alba to tell her the Acapulco hotel, after having been cited by Franco for discrimination (never mess with a lawyer!) has decided to give them their best room this weekend--and for free!  So pack your bags again because it's going to be sheer perfection!

Cue the thunderstorm.  In the form of Tiziano who comes into the office to darken Franco's mood. "Just want you to know I have my own cases, outside of the ones I handle for this office--and so I'll be representing Ingrid, pro-bono, in her lawsuit against Alba for killing Javier."  Franco isn't fooled.  "First you tried to rob Alba from me, and now you're representing Ingrid!  I'm onto you." -" No matter," sniffs Tiz," you need to know that lawyers should have cool heads in a case.  But you are all too visceral." Whatever.

The Aqua House

Alba and Gabriel, all lovey-dovey and giggly after a fab day of mother-son bonding return home to a distraught Ingrid, pretending to be fine.  She maintains Gabe's medical studies showed no problem whatsoever, even though Phantom Javier keeps looking at her menacingly.  It's so obvious that even ditzy Alba notices, but to no avail.  So she says a gushy good-bye to Gabe who still wonders why he has such righteous nosebleeds.  No matter.  Mom is off to a romantic weekend in Acapulco and modern teen Gabriel is all for it.  Enjoy yourself Mom!

(Okay.  Granted I'm a dinosaur.  But no wise priest giving ethical advice! (whether followed or not) Happy threesomes in the bedroom with two of our "good characters". And teen or young adult children blessing their parents' extramarital affairs.  It's just all a little too modern for me. Time to retire from watching I guess.)

And Speaking of Threesomes....

Gael, grinning like the Cheshire Cat, is cozying up to Bianca again in the café.  He's basking in the glow that she's a liberal, liberated, risk-taking, fun-loving lady who jumped into his crowded bed last night because she couldn't resist the sight of his fabulous bod in a towel. Clearly she's the perfect woman for him--ready to grant his wildest fantasies.  Au contraire, she's just his friend, Bianca explains. A lot more interested in the other lady than in him.  This leads to the usual noble "I hope you find the lady of your dreams...I hope you do too" bit.  Moving on.  These swingers are way too fast for this granny.


Julián's Cuartucho (hovel of an "office")

Paolo rolls in for yet another endless conversation on who Juls is actually covering for in the accident investigation.  Pao doesn't believe it's Rufino. 'Cause Ruf sez he's innocent.  Juls' lines.  Paolo's lines.  Enter Roberta. Who suggests they go to jail and put Julián in front of Rufino.  If Ruf still maintains his innocence, hmmm...maybe something's up. Paolo exits to go talk to Franco while Juls gets testy with Bertie.  Till she assures him that the Rufino problem has all been taken care of.
  Julian:  YOU KILLED HIM?
Roberta:   NO, I HAVE PEOPLE WHO DO THAT FOR ME."

Okay.  Glad we have that straightened out.

  Bertie is annoyed that Juls isn't as grateful as she thinks  he should be--and suggests he start burnishing his image a bit, because right now he's looking like a wretch. After all he drugged her daughter, let her drive when she was in no condition, and then advised her to flee the scene.  When you think about it, all this is his fault.  So straighten up kid. I'm tired of having to clean up all your mistakes.

Franco's Office

Better visitor this time.  Sweet daughter Natalia.  Who gets to hear how Mom Roberta literally left Tiz at the altar (a nice switch on the woeful bride stories). But now Mr. Tiz is handling Bertie's divorce and hoping to put Alba back in jail as well.  "Has he told her?" queries Nat. "No, thought I'd wait for this weekend.  She's so happy now with her son." Nat wisely points out the news would also ruin their Acapulco romp.  So save it for later, Dad.

In rolls Paolo.  Wants Franco to go with him to jail to see Rufino.  Asks Nat her opinion.  She has none.  But thinks Ruf is innocent. (Hah! of course!) Gael barges in with the dreadful news that Rufino has committed suicide. Cue the soporific anguish from Nat. Another load on her sleepy conscience.

Paolo's Apartment

He's in a terrible mood after learning of Rufino's death and just wants Nat to leave--the sooner the better.  Okay.  But  before she goes, she promises that one day the true culprit will pay, and be behind bars. (Cheap talk Nati.  Cheap talk.  DO SOMETHING!) 

Urzúa Mansion

Bertie, topping off her fun day of homicides and trash-talking, is now swilling some booze.  Papi Mauro, dropping in, does not approve. Cue the umpteenth I wanted-a-perfect-family-but-Franco-is-leaving-me-Neni is lost-me-crazy lady-drowning-in-alcohol.  Mauro dismisses all this as temporary--she's going through a bad patch with the divorce, that's all.  But there's still a lot of good in her life--for instance, she has HIM...Dad!

This, for some reason, drives Bertie to take refuge behind a white flowering plant.  The rest of the conversation takes place with her peering out between the leaves.  And it's basically this: LARGATE! [Leave!]

Which he does.

There's a lot of crazy laughter going on as well.  I think the actress is having a ball with this role.  But it's getting tiresome.

And Speaking of Tiresome....

Another phone call from Soggy Paolo apologizing to Neni for his churlish behavior earlier.  He assures her before the wretched accident  ruined his life he was a chipper, cheerful fella.  Somehow this fails to make her feel better. So on he drones about  coming to the big city as a 17-year-old.  He with dreams of being a big-time soccer player.  Dante with dreams of becoming a great singer.  Well, Dante can still realize those dreams.  But not him.  The only time he "touches the sky" now is when he and Nat make love. (which was all of one time)

So Who Will be "Touching the Sky" this Weekend?

Well, it could be Franco and Alba if his particular fantasies come true.  They're both hanging around the hotel foyer, wearing matching necklaces and holding holiday cocktails, while an unctuous hotel manager assures them they'll have not only the honeymoon cottage with private pool, but it's all gratis!  Franco, doing a pretty good Cheshire Cat smirk himself, instructs Alba to go to the patio where they danced last weekend.  When she trips down the steps, there are white streamers hanging from the trees and a multitude of scarlet bouquets, including one special arrangement just for her.  As the theme music swells, Franco moves in for a kiss, and another, and another, and....well you get the idea.

Tune in tomorrow to see if this all  weekend canoodling ends well.

Labels:


Comments:
Thank you for your recrap, Judy. That is not a typo….this episode was just that. This telenovela has reached that point. It was a burdensome episode yet you soldiered on.

QTH is wrong with Gabriel? I’m not buying he has whatever killed Javier. Otherwise, why did the writers show us that Ingy has been drugging him?
And WHY DOES Alba believe Ingrid? (beanie hat moment!) She needs to talk to the doctor himself and get the diagnosis from him.

Wasn’t Tizzy’s assistant in crime a prison guard? Gee….remind me to never end up in a Mexican prison.

Well, at least we now have the 411 on Bianca’s preference. Poor Gael.

Julian: YOU KILLED HIM?
Roberta: NO, I HAVE PEOPLE WHO DO THAT FOR ME."

Ah, the joy of entitlement and deep pockets.

FFWD→ Natalia, Paolo, Juls & Roberta scenes

And still nobody bats an eyelash at Roberta's suddenly-twelve-inches-longer hair. Why does this bother me? Why do I care? #quarentinemadness


OT
I'm having more fun watching the Samurai Cat TV series on amazon prime video, and it's free.
 

Gracias, Judy.

Definitely not a great episode, but we all get those from time to time.

Tizzy, more blood follows blood money. [Did anyone see the note?]

Doctor, do every test in the world and call Alba now. You should know more about this very fractured family.

Franco, make Tizzy resign because of this conflict of interest and be sure to tell your suegro.

Alba, call the doctor immediately and don't lie to Gabriel.

Gael, there are many more fish in the sea. She isn't into you. [Writers, you really blew it here.]

Roberta, you are not as smart as you think you are. You also invade Franco's office too often.

Tizzy, you are a total idiot killing for this loca.

Natalia, you may become the next victim now.

Roberta, no tienes alma. What you are doing to Natalia is worse than any prison cell.

Mauro, look at your computer. There are things you need to know.

Franco, check the hotel room for cameras.

Alba, Gabriel is in danger.
 

Hmmm...I'll have to check out the Samurai Cat TV series DORIS. Particularly since it's free (like Franco and Alba's romantic weekend!)

And yes, why does no one say "Roberta you hair has grown a gazillion inches and changed color overnight." Did they re-shoot the opening scenes? But even so, why allow such lack of continuity? They must have been in a hurry to wrap this one up. Well we are too!

Well, we thought this story would be enthralling because it had a different subject--mercy killing. But basically it's just the same old same old thwarted romances with an eventual happy ending. I guess. Or maybe a threesome!
 

URBAN ANTHROPOLOGIST...Yikes. I never thought of hidden cameras in the honeymoon suite. What a horrible thought.

Anyway, I do enjoy your "Ask Urban" approach to the comments and your juicy advice to our characters. We'll see if any of them pays attention to your wise counsel. In the meantime, still bummed that the Gael/Bianca connection didn't pan out...although you tried to warn me.
 

I was up at 4 am this morning (don't ask) so I may not have any more to say tonight. But will check in with our lively patio tomorrow. Right now my medicated eye is burning and I'm ready to call it quits.
 

Judy, your recrap (I love that, Doris!) was so organized and thorough and understandable. Are you sure you don't want to give the show's writers and producers a little help?

Victoria, I'm sorry you were right there for the tornadoes. I hope your power is on and you are doing okay.

Wouldn't you be ticked if you woke up one morning and your hair had miraculously grown 6" overnight and nobody noticed? Writers, at least have ONE person touch it and say "Cute do". That's all they need to do.

Are Julieta and Pedro just out of the show now?

It is finally dawning on Natalia that as long as she does not come forward with the truth, her life is, indeed, a prison. Do the right thing, Girl!
 

Judy, I can't believe you managed to make something entertaining out of that poop sandwich of an episode. You're magic, girl.

My favorite lines:

"Cue the soporific anguish from Nat. Another load on her sleepy conscience." (Seriously, instead of Jiminy Cricket, this girl must have Jiminy Sloth.)

"Bertie, topping off her fun day of homicides and trash-talking, is now swilling some booze."

"This, for some reason, drives Bertie to take refuge behind a white flowering plant."

Also love "the righteous nosebleeds." Doesn't Dante's band need a name?
 

And I'm probably one of the most liberal folks on the patio -- I usually am, on any patio -- but ITA on the TMI. I don't care who you sleep with, but if it's not a plot propeller, I REALLY don't care. As in couldn't. possibly. care. less. Next!

As for Franco and Alba, sure, whatever. But wasn't he just waxing self-righteous about how they were NOT going to be intimate until the divorce was final? ALL of these characters seem to have disintegrating personalities, not just the visibly insane.
 

OT

SAMURAI CAT (TV series free on amazon Prime)

JudyB - I finished the first season last night and am really glad I learned about this show. Cat lovers especially would enjoy this. I'm a cat-liker (allergies) and am really taken by Tamanojo, the kitty protagonist, as are all humans in the show who meet this cat. 💗 There seems to be stories of redemption throughout.

Twelve 1/2-hr episodes in all for season 1, and hopefully I will begin season 2 today and be so sad when it ends. Each episode has two 1-minute black screen times for commercials we do not see, but they can be FFWDed in 10-second increments.
 

Good Morning Sweet Patio. Glad to see we're all our usual sassy selves.

ROSEMARY LA OTRA... I think Victoria has a generator, so her electricity at home is still on. One of our daughters in Charlotte does not have one, so she was without juice from 4 am till quite late, but I have a feeling their next big purchase might be a generator as well. After all, they can't travel to exotic places for vacation at this point.

And yes to this that you said:

It is finally dawning on Natalia that as long as she does not come forward with the truth, her life is, indeed, a prison. Do the right thing, Girl!

Indeed. Plus, how can she have any self-respect if random people are dying because she refuses to come forward. No wonder she's retreated into a permanent, half-life stupor.

BLUE LASS...You're killing me here. "Righteous Nosebleeds" as a name for the band! Yikes. Given how I feel about some of what passes for music these days, I think that's pure genius. Although Dante does seem to go in for melodic woe is me romantic songs, which fit right in with my weakness for the old torch songs of the 40's.

Also agree that Franco's self-righteousness is more annoying than the fact that he's clearly got plans for the weekend that don't involve fidelity-till-the-divorce-is-over number he's preaching. I imagine those amorous plans will come a-cropper anyway. This sumptuous, gratis weekend is just looking all too easy. And it never is in these stories. Maybe Gabe will have another "righteous nosebleed" and they'll have to dash back home.

DORIS...Your avatar always lifts my spirits. Wimped out of watching Samurai Cat last night because it required an additional subscription and I'm always wary of getting sucked into another payment after the "free" show ends. Sounded intriguing though.
 

OT

Judy -this "additional subscription" ... was that something called TOKU? No, that is not needed. Try copying and pasting this:
https://www.amazon.com/Samurai-Cat/dp/B07P5L2F2T
into your browser. I figured out ways to circumvent whatever that additional subscription thing is. I spend enough money on our Prime and won't give them a penny more. Ya basta.
 

Judy, you would have loved our unconventional Easter celebration. Our next-door neighbor, who is a musician -- Great American Songbook -- gave a mini-concert from his garage, and all the neighbors sat 6+ feet apart in lawn chairs on the 2-acre undeveloped lot behind our house with their dogs, wine, and ganas de cantar. Flyyyy Me to the Moooooon...
 

DORIS...Yes. It was TOKU. Clever you for figuring out a way to circumvent that. Admire your technical skills more than I can say. #stillpaperandpencilgal

BLUE LASS...Oh my, Great American Songbook is a superb way to celebrate Easter and the promise of Spring. And also, how nice to have a 2-acre undeveloped lot behind your house...may it ever be thus. Sounds like a perfect combination of music, neighborly friendship and vino. Very mellow indeed.
 

Blue Lass - your Easter celebration sounds wonderful. We had cold driving rain and gratitude for a warm dry house. :-D
 

Judyb..Thank you so much for your excellent replay of all the weirdness. Around and around we go.

OT...Today is our older daughter's birthday, so we have been videochatting , and I have been sending her photos and pages from her baby book. Born at 7.38a.m. ... 5 lbs 14 1\2... 19 1\2 inches. Such sweet memories of a very happy day for Hub and me and our two families.
OKAy, I am going out to walk before today's episode starts at 2.00.
 

SUSANLYNN...Sounds like your older daughter is a petite and pretty princess. Like her mom (judging from your tiny shoe size). I love the British term for that:

"a pocket Venus"

The Brits do have a way with words.

Nos to see if the writers of this mess can do any better today.
 

JudyB--Can't believe it took this long to get around to your recap and comments. As always, you deliver with pizzazz, no matter what the ingredients. Thank you for the sparkles in amongs the dull as dishwater episode. It's so frustrating to go from ok, to action packed, move the story along, and then to a perfect stall.

Still, Julian is suffering (good)
Nat is still whining (bad)
Paolo is still crying (spare me)
Gael gets the news (bad for us)
Bertie seems not to be worried about confessing any more (she has Tizzy in her corner)
Tizzy whistles while he works (good one JudyB)
Ingrid thinks she has the upper hand (bad)
Mauro seems fine without Ingrid (back to being the supposedly concerned Daddy)
Katie didn't put in an appearance (whew, what a relief)
Franco and Alba are having too much fun together(Gabe had better get a Righteous Nosebleed)
 

ANITA....Good to hear from you. Usually by the time you check in, I’ve already seen the next episode and am tempted to comment on that. In fact I’ll be interested to hear how our Take No Prisoners Blue Lass handles it.

OT
How was Governor Cuomo’s press conference today?. I was off dealing with mundane medical issues during his usual broadcast time, but must say he is eminently watchable. Loved his description of New York Tough the other day

Glad you are well and busy as usual. Is that last peony bush safely in the ground.?
 





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