Saturday, March 24, 2012
La Que No Podía Amar #63 Friday 3/23/12 Much Ado About Mgrito, or Don’t Cry For Me, Margarito!
Cap 63
Lo del Pasado:
Ulises is walking on thin ice with Macaria over his literally small town mentality when it comes to keeping Maripaz on a short leash and refusing to let her study for a career in psychology in Mexico City. Also, Rogelio nearly blows his stack when he and Ana Paula get the bad news from Ernesto that Margarito may never walk again. A pall has fallen over Paula and her posse.
Lo del Nuevo:
At Hacienda del Fuerte, a distraught Ana Paula informs the very worried Gustavo that Margarito may never walk again. It hurts Gus as much as her. He offers his shoulder to cry on and she tearfully takes it. Sinthia blows a gasket when she catches the two of them in mid hug’n hold. The two innocents, so pure of heart, trying gallantly to stay on the up and up for all the right reasons, can’t help but look guilty as sin to Sin.
Sinthia doesn’t accept Guscakes (admittedly) piss-poor excuse and carps to Ana Paula about not keeping her distance from El Gusto who’s all “mío”. Pau’s got her own man’s shoulder to cry on; and if she needs “to look for consolation” then to do it with Rogelio, her husband, and not with El Gusto! Sin begins draping herself, then, all over poor frazzled Guscakes and plants a possessive lip-lock on him for emphasis. He plays along, though perhaps (methinks) not as willingly as before. Embarrassed, and with her heart somewhat in pieces still, AP walks away rather disgusted at the outburst, to leave the two “lovers” to themselves.
Sin franticly apologizes to Guscakes for her jealous attitude, saying essentially that she doesn’t trust AP any further than she can throw her. Why, Paula turned Bro-Hell’s head in nothin’ flat, she exclaims, and she wouldn’t put it past her to do the same thing with him! Gus tells her to calm down and understand it was just like he said it was. Sinthia is still in panic mode. Any man Sinthia loves, smothering him in suffocating, territorial smooches, has got to be hers and hers only!! As Gus lets himself be pulled in by Sinthia’s ….uhm… rather excessive angst, it’s apparent that he has gotten to see in stark fashion the difference between his Cupcake Princess, Paula the Pink, and the brazen Boonies B!tch-witch of Rich raised in the wilds of Chiapas that he’s now chained himself to for spite. (I’ll drink to that! Bottoms up, Babycakes!)
Macaria stomps away from useless Uli’s homespun sputtering through the darkened streets of downtown San Gabriel all in a snit. A few blocks down the street she is accosted by none other than her one-night stand, aka, Efrain. Effer’s all hot to trot and suggests they try for another steamy bit of sheet time in a no-tell motel somewhere close by. Effer teases her about being the oh-so-desirable forbidden fruit, and says that he’s just the medicine she needs to salve that sore-spot of a hubby she’s got. They share a few stolen spit swaps in the darkened alley as Viewerville whittles Macaria a notch a few inches lower on the proverbial post.
Back in Rog’s office, Ernie’s explaining to him that he’s got to remain calm for Mgrito because a negative attitude from the two of them could do the boy harm emotionally and thus physically. Rog says that’s easy for him to say. He’s obviously got the speech down pat after giving it to so many patients. Ernie says that may be, but he’s come to understand the plight of those of his patients stuck in a wheelchair. Life goes on. It’s simply a matter of acceptance [aceptación].
Macaria refuses Effer’s invitation. Supposedly he was just testing her to see if there were still some sparks in the ashes left from their bedded bonfire the night before. Talk turns to Uli’s keeping her on such a tight leash that Macaria still hasn’t seen the letter he’s kept from her all these years. Macaria finally pulls herself away and tells him to find her later on. She’s got to git. Effer tells himself once she’s gone that if he can get his hands on that letter then he might be able to take advantage of it somehow. (Blackmail, anyone?)
In the kitchen, Maria is explaining to Rosaura that the reason Ro-Hell is feeling so depressed over Margarito is that he was just as bad off when they found him as Margarito is now. Rosie blows it off like it’s just the flu or something. “—Ehh! Doesn’t necessarily mean the same thing’s going to happen to the kid.” Paula walks in on them at that point and Maria is anxious to know the doc’s prognosis. Pau says they’ll just have to wait till the inflammation dies down before they’ll have any idea whether he will ever walk again. Rosie adds her two centavos’ worth to say they all hope it doesn’t come to that. (Yeah, what would she do with 2 invalids in Pau’s nuclear family then, poor dearie! The expense! Less for Rosie to get her hands on and to enjoy!!) Pau and Maria are devastated.
Macaria returns to the plop ‘n shop. The curiosity bug Effer’s dropped in her ear has gotten the best of her. She continues the same argument from before with Uli, even gripes about his hiding things from her. Maripaz walks in on them. Uli leaves with Maripaz for a chat. Macaria asks herself how many things Uli really is hiding from her and starts trying to pry open his locked metal file cabinets.
Meanwhile, Rog has gone back to the unconscious Margarito’s room and reminisces over the boy’s innocent mischief. If only they could return to that. Pau walks up at that point and, from the doorway, hears Rog telling the boy that he won’t let the two of them be separated; and that he doesn’t want him to suffer the same fate as his. The Cupcake is muy but muy impactada.
Back in town, Effer has followed Macaria back to her convenience store apparently under pretext of being unable to leave her alone. She pulls the screwdriver she’s using on him and warns him to keep his distance or better still, go to the bar. And, yeah, her curiosity has gotten the best of her. He takes the screwdriver and tries to open the drawer himself.
Pau walks into Mgrito’s room now also. Rog apologizes for his earlier outburst. It’s not easy being paralyzed and stuck in a wheelchair. (No duh!) Pau says he’s gotten on with his life and manages very well. The difference is, Rog points out, that he’d already sewn his wild oats before he became paralyzed. He’d seen the world and lived to enjoy it. Mgrito is still a little boy with his whole life ahead of him. The two decide they’ll both stay in the bedroom that night to watch over him.
Maripaz walks in on Macaria and Effer and asks what’s up. Macaria lies that there’s another rat roaming around the room that Effer’s trying to find.
Back at Hell-Fuerte, Maria walks in on the group of guests and Sin eating din-din in the dining room. She explains that Rog and Pau won’t be joining them for dinner tonight due to their wanting to stay by Margarito’s bedside. (Viewerville somehow doesn’t see AP putting herself out there to be Mersnotty’s and Sin’s target tonight or any night. If she’s smart she’ll eat with Rog up in her bedroom till Miss Merciless decides to head back to Tuxtla. Of course, this begs the question: doesn’t Miss Mercy have a job waiting for her? Just how many vacation days does the woman get, anywho?) MentiRosa shows up about then expecting to eat with her familiars till she notices all the obnoxious guests in the dining room without her. Sin has news for Rosie. Nada doin’ since Bro-Hell and Paula aren’t coming down tonight. She’s not welcome! We’ll see about that, is Rosie’s reply. Maria shows up and tells Rosie to be a bit more prudent, i.e., discreet, and to stay away!! Rosie thinks to herself afterwards that there’s no way she’d be eating at the same table with Gustavo and his snooty sis! As if!!
After dinner’s done, Sin grabs Gus and heads off in order to leave Ernie and Mercedes alone to discuss their situation. We hear more of the same: Merciless rejects Ernie’s advances once again because his spoiled teenaged daughter refuses to accept her as a stepmother. (Take a hint, Ernie. It takes one to know one and Mercedes knows what she’s talking about! You can do better! Like Nurse Daniela for instance? Hmmmm! Now that would be a winning combination!)
At the same time in the living room, Gus gets after Sin for leaving his sis with the tempting Ernesto. At times, he explains, it’s best not to let one’s self get carried away with a few days of momentary passion. Anyway, it’s cost her a great deal of effort to maintain her distance from Dr. Ernie. Can’t she see that? (What? This spoiled, impetuous, rich-b!tch wildcat? Gus, you are so screwed up!) Sin says he is talking as if it had happened to him. (Oh yeah! Just wait, you screwball b!tch. You have no idea!!!) Gus admits he did live through something like it. Of course, Sin doesn’t know the half of it. (If Karma plays any part in this at all, she is going to wish she hadn’t gotten anywhere near ol’ Babycakes! Again, must see t.v.!!) However, Gus says, looking into her eyes, he found his way and there she was in it—er…he found her on the way. Sin smiles innocently at him and says they must have been destined to meet and to fall in love. He answers her with more smoochie-koochie (but whether it’s to prove it to her or to himself, we don’t really know).
In San Gabriel again, Maripaz tells Macaria she wants her freedom, not to be tied down like her parents did to her. Uli races back in and it’s the argument in redux deluxe. Finally Macaria threatens that if Maripaz leaves she’s going with her and divorcing Uli!!
In another part of Hell-Fuerte, meantime, Oh-Hell is feeling really down. He rolls his way into the abandoned family chapel and lights a candle for Mgrito. He tells the diosito that the boy needs a chance. He’s lost out with Rog cuz Ro-Hell hasn’t enough faith left in him anymore. Pau does, though, he adds. “--Do it for Paula’s sake. She has plenty and maybe that will be enough.” Rog then blows out the candle and rolls back out the way he came.
Later that night Rog wakes Paula by yelling in his sleep during another panic-filled nightmare. Paula tells him to have faith that Mgrito will get well. He reminds her that he lost it a while ago. No problem. She has enough and she’ll pray for the both of them. Rog watches her at the little corner altar in her bedroom and stays respectfully quiet.
The next morning, Ernie is on the balcony of the hacienda with Mersnotty and reminds her again how much he loves her. He kisses her and walks away. She secretly smiles. FF>>
Maria, meanwhile, races into Margarito’s room to get Paula so she can show her the surprise Rogelio has for her.
Across the balcony in Michael’s room, Rosie mentions that Rog was thinking of buying the neighboring ranch, La Negra, for Paula but that somebody had already bought it and Rog wants to buy it for her from them. They’ll need to find out who it was then. Mikey tells her that Bruno’s probably already doing exactly that. After a moment he asks her if she really thinks Bruno can be trusted. She says why not when he’s the one who’s helped them out the most these past few months? She changes the subject to him convincing his sister that she should accept the ranch from Rog. Mikey fights the idea because it’s only one more thing that’s tying them down to Ro-Hell. They’re drowning in his “good will” and gift-giving. Ro-Hell may love Pau and all, but he’s got a strange way of showing it, he says. Mikey suddenly refuses to go along with anymore. From now on they will manage to get by on their own and through their own effort. Riiiiiiight, says Rosie. He can’t even take care of himself! “--Look at you! You’re nervous and obsessed, a slob! Accept it Michael! We need Rogelio Montero’s help whether we like it or not!”
Pau walks onto the balcony and Rog opens the door to the chapel which is now spotless and shining, fully lighted with candles, and filled with fragrant white roses. (Darn! I wonder how many little elves he had to have to get the place spruced up so fast.)
Bruno stops by David’s office later that morning for a quick meeting. Big Dave’s taking a trip in order to buy the poison he plans to put into the cattle’s feed. Bruno reminds him to keep his lips zipped around both Vanessa and Sinthia. Vainie walks in and greets them both at that point. Bruno tells her that he has the documents ready for the notary to sign. Yep, the sooner the better, she says all bidnez-like. He explains that she needs to get to it since Rog has mentioned he wants to buy La Negra to give to Paula. Nessa sniffs. “—As if she deserved it!” “—He wants me to find out who bought it and is willing to make another offer, to the new owner. Just think of how upset he’ll be to find out you’re the new owner.” “--Yeah, and think of how upset he’ll be when he isn’t getting water from it either. It will be hard for me to keep my big mouth shut quiet but I'll have to do it."
Once Bruno’s gone, Big Dave informs Nessa that he’s leaving town to get the poison for the feed. She’s upset that he’ll be away at the same time they’ll be turning off the water to Rogelio’s property. Can’t be helped, he says. She reminds him news travels fast around there in that small town, so to be extremely discreet. He’s going to Tuxtla, he says, and will delay a while not to call attention to himself; the people he knows there are being paid plenty for their silence. “--Good, because nothing will stop me from getting my way about this!”
Paula takes Rog’s hand in hers and prays in the chapel as he looks on. FF>>
Outside, a shirtless Hugo is laying sod or something. Dani shows up and asks if he needs her to get him something to drink. Mikey runs up and tells her he’s been set free to wander the grounds by himself whenever he wants now. She says, rather disinterestedly, that she doesn’t know whether that’s a good thing or not. He may be free of the police but not from the desire to drink. He gets upset and says he’s stopped for sure. Yeah, that’s what they all say, she replies flatly. He stops her in mid-topic and so she immediately blows him and his dorky attitude off. Sure she’s happy that he’s in good spirits and such, but it really doesn’t matter to her anymore. (Translation: Have a nice day, you mucked-up jackass! I am tired of you and bored with it already. Now get the F outta my way!!) As if that put down wasn’t enough, Hugo starts in on him, too, now.
Meanwhile, in a three hankie scene, Mgrito wakes up and wants to know if he’ll be able to walk again or to climb trees and run through the grounds-- or will he end up crippled in a wheelchair and cranky like Ro-Hell. Rog has rolled past and heard this last comment of Mgrito’s. (Viewerville notes that Rog wasn’t exactly pleased to hear Mgrito’s spot on description of El Boss.) Paula promises Mgrito that no matter what happens she will never desert him. Rog rolls in at that point and forgives the boy for not listening to him when he warned him to stay off the trellises. He then assures Mgrito that neither he nor Paula will leave his side or ever abandon him. He’ll always be well-cared for. Margarito is chipper and full of smiles once he hears this. (Insulin Alert! Too much happy, happy, joy, joy for one person to swallow! My blood sugar runneth over. Blechhhh!!!)
Outdoors again, Hugo asks Mikey if he really loves Dani. Sure, replies Mike, for years before I ever told her. So pretty! We were in love but things changed when I ended up in jail. Then the drinking and things won’t change till I’m better. Well, says Hugo, your drinking has driven her off the rails. She’s better off looking to find happiness with somebody else. “--Like who for instance? Like You?” Damn straight, says Hugo! “--I’d give my life to make her happy if she’d say yes to me!” (Oh, Hugo! You do seem sincere, but, this segment of Viewerville considers you akin to The Green Giant and your supposed celluloid sex appeal is, well, non-existent.)
Ernie walks in to examine Margarito. Rog tells him he’d like to have him stay for a few days till the boy shows some improvement. Ernie says he can’t because he’s still got patients in Tuxtla. Rog offers to fly him in and back daily by helicopter if need be. Ernie’s says he’ll consider it. (Hey, I’d take him up on it, Ernie, if you’re that stuck on Ms. Mercy. She’s wavering as well as quavering. No time like the present to be present!)
Outside again, Hugo tells Mikey he has no intention of getting better. If he did, he’d throw himself into his work and forget all about drinking! Mike has no idea how to treat a woman, Hugo says, and if he really loved Dani he’d never be the gross jerk and Grinch around there that he’s been to her and everyone else there that’s done all they could to help Mikey out! As it is, everyone is sick and tired of his one-man pity party!! He ought to be making a man of himself instead of wandering about the place waiting for somebody else to solve his problems for him—and not for Dani’s sake, but for his own! (Ok, Hugo!! You’ve earned points, but Green Giants still aren’t my cuppa cuppa.) Mikey tells Hugo to just keep his mouth shut and leave well enough alone since he doesn’t know as much as he thinks he does about what’s been going on there.
Back in town, Uli tells his troubles to Effer. He’s always been faithful to Macaria and has taken his promise to make a life for her to heart, yada, yada, yada. Effer pretends to empathize with him and tells him to run after Macaria, to explain things and to convince her not to leave. He promises to look after the office while Uli takes a break. Of course, as soon as Uli’s gone he takes the keys Uli has just used to lock the drawer in question and reopens it. (Duhn-duhn-duhn!!!)
At Hell-Fuerte, Merciless tells Gus that she’s becoming dream-eyed again about Ernesto, having spent time alone here away from the rest of the world. Gus agrees that one cannot stop loving simply by decree [por decreto]. He realized that when he hugged Ana Paula the other day. Everything came rushing back [remover = to dig up, stir up, revive]. Mersnotty gets frustrated with him and asks why he did it! Didn’t he think about Sinthia or about Ro-Hell? Sure, he says, but he still couldn’t avoid it. Mercedes tells him it’s better that they just leave the hacienda. Gus says it way too late for that. He’s already committed to working on Rog’s projects and besides, there’s Sinthia to consider. They’re going together and he doesn’t want her to get hurt. Well then, advises Big Sis, watch it when you’re around that female! “--Look, tell me the truth. Are you sticking around here in the hacienda because of your work or in order to be near Rogelio Montero’s wife??!!” (At least Jose Ron does do puzzled rather convincingly.)
Meanwhile, it only takes a couple of minutes before Effer discovers the letter from Mgrito’s mama that he was looking for.
Alone with Rog again, Pau tells Rog that she wants Margarito protected and safe. He says they’ll adopt him. Margarito will have his name and will be provided for economically. She reminds him they already discussed that and nixed it because their marriage isn’t a real one, and once the contract is up, she’s gone for good. He says no, it’s a legal marriage and so they’ll adopt him; and when the contract is up, well, they’ll get divorced and she’ll get to take the boy with her.
Labels: no-podia
El Mundo de Telemundo - Discuss among yourselves: Week of March 26
!Bienvenida a la primavera! Although here in New Jersey it's been more like summer for the last few days. As this week ends, it appears that two of our protagonistos are "entre la vida y la muerte": Mau is hit by a car in Relaciónes Pelegrosas and Ángela is shot in Corazón Valiente. So over to you.
Labels: relaciones, telemundo, valiente
Abismo de pasión #10 3/23/12: Before you marry, make sure you know whom you are going to divorce.*
*From “Yiddish Proverbs” edited by Hanan J. Ayalti.
Nasty and Old
We get to see Lucio punch out Gabino’s lights. And we hear the old man tell him that sooner or later someone younger will come along and take HIS place at the procesadora, someone with more rights to that place than he has (Sons of Rosendo, wherever you are! Game on!)
We get to see rotten Carwatermelon go splat in the empty pool.
Nasty and New
Elisa wails Lolita’s name. Lolita comes to the rescue, climbing into the pool with surprising agility. Then somehow she manages to get help.
We are spared the details of the scooping up and removal of the ugli fruit.
Suddenly it and we are transported to the Health Center. Lolita and Blanca are huddled with Elisa, trying to comfort her. (“ I know she’ll blame me and my father will believe her!”) Disgusto joins them.
Now Dr. Tovar comes out looking, if not happy, at least relieved. Augusto is the father of a healthy son. While Carmina is in serious condition, she’ll recover. The problem is, because of complications in the emergency surgery, she will never be able to have another child.
Elisa wants to see her little brother but Disgusto dismisses her coldly, sending her home with Lolita.
Nightfall
In the Health Center, Augusto smiles fondly at the new baby.
Back at Casa Castañon, no one is smiling. Lolita tries to console Elisa.
Disgusto finally gets around to visiting his juiced orange. The fact that she’s unconscious doesn’t stop her from running her mouth:
It’s Elisa’s fault... Estefanía was terrible ... It’s my son – don’t take him from me, Rosendo ... Don’t do anything to him, Rosendo ... he’s yours, Rosendo ... he’s your son.
Say what? Disgusto leans over the raving ramera and shakes her angrily. What is she talking about? Why is she saying Rosie’s name? (How stupid ARE you, Augie?)
The nurse pulls him off her and ousts him from the room: Can’t he see that she’s sick? (Um. No, not quite yet.)
Braulio pays a surprise visit to Lolita at Casa Castañon. Will she marry him? They’ve been novios for a year. And he’s thinking of leaving the procesadora (“No aguanto a Gabino Mendoza” I can’t abide GM). They can go to a new town where he can find work and they can start a life together.
Lolita adores him but his proposal has taken her by surprise. She’s not so sure about the leaving part ...
Hubris? I’ll give you hubris! (or think twice about naming your kid after an emperor)
Padre Lupe warns Augusto he has become estranged from God. This crisis is a chance to get closer to Him. Augusto retorts that it is God who has moved away from him. (Lightning bolt, anyone?)
Doc Tovar has heard about Augie’s angry bedside outburst and now tells him that when people are delirious they say crazy sh*t. He has cared for Carmina all the way through her pregnancy – from that day she fainted in the street and ...
... Fainting in the street? News to Augie. But what really worries him is the PREMATURE birth of his son. They only got married eight months ago.
Doc is taken aback. (Why? He lives with the biggest gossip in town. Can he really be the only person in La Ermita who doesn’t remember two funerals and a wedding eight months ago?)
The nurse rescues him by letting Disgusto know that Carmina is awake and asking to see him.
Carmina is more gray than orange today. Still her crazy eyes gleam madly as she prattles on – they’ll name their son Augusto, after his father ... Now all they need is a daughter ... Elisa? She’s not HER daughter ... She wants a daughter with her blood and his ...
When she’s a bit better, they need to talk, Augie tells her.
The Wicked Black Widow is Whack
Doc’s been blabbing again. Now Begoña shares the latest with her BFF, Alfie: Carmina can’t have any more kids! The Black Widow’s reaction:
Me alegra. Seguramente es un castigo divino para que el apellido Bouvier no se prolifere más. (I’m glad. It’s surely a divine punishment to keep the Bouvier name from spreading any further).
Whoa. Even Begoña looks a little freaked. There we have it – Alfie’s theme for the night – It’s a punishment from God. Instead of repeating it, we’ll just say The Widow is Whack (thus blithely stealing the idea, if not the actual words, from Sylvia. Meh. So sue me.)
Enjoy it while you can, Carmina
Disgusto isn’t buying Carmina’s “Es igualito a ti” (He looks just like you!). Why didn’t she tell him about her fainting spell?
Blanca and Elisa’s entrance spares the sour citrus the effort of lying. Elisa wants to meet her little brother but tía Naranja warns her to stay away – she might hurt him! Meanwhile, Disgusto slinks out.
The Boss Lady wants to know
Gabino reports to Alfie that Disgusto’s invernadero isn’t doing well. His whole life is kind of going downhill since he was widowed while Alfie’s fortunes are soaring. The Widow is Whack. Okay, it’s divine justice this time. What isn’t just, slimes Gabino, is for a woman as beautiful as Alfie to be alone. She’s still in mourning, she sniffs.
He’s not breathing!
Back at the Health Center, Blanca helps Carmina get out of bed and step out of the room for a moment. This gives Elisa a few seconds to take a close look at her little brother. She speaks to him so sweetly – “I’m your sister and I’m going to help take care of you and we’ll play together ...”
The nurse comes in to bathe the baby. Elisa tells her the child is asleep. But when the nurse leans down to pick up the infant, she gasps: “He isn’t breathing....”
And Carmina and Blanca return just in time to hear the nurse say: “¡El niño está muerto!” (The child is dead!)
[Um. Excuse me. The baby stops breathing for several seconds and no one tries to resuscitate him? Are you kidding me?]
Carmina goes ape and aims for her favorite scapegoat, Elisa. Blanca is able to keep Carmina from hurting the little girl physically but she can’t stem the tide of venom that pours from her mouth : “What did you do to the baby, Elisa? You’re a murderer!”
Blanca takes the girl outside the room and tries to comfort her while Carmina holds the dead baby in her arms and sobs.
Elisa murmurs tearfully to Blanca: “Yo no hice nada, te lo juro, madrina, yo no hice nada.” (I didn’t do anything, I swear, godmother, I didn’t do. anything).
Now Augie comes back and Blanca tells him what has happened. The doctor calls it crib death (muerte de cuna). His place is with Carmina, she reminds him. Now is when she really needs him.
He finds her in bed, a terrifying zombie stare replacing the manic elation of a few moments ago. And she repeats ad nauseum: Elisa killed my son! When Augusto tells her that’s crazy talk, she doubles her bets: She didn’t trip and fall – Elisa pushed her so she’d lose her baby. “Es un demonio, es una maldita, es un peligro!”
Not everyone is in the Health Center.
Braulio and Lolita are courting. So sweet. And so doomed. They love each other. It’s also no secret that Antonia, Alfie’s maid, has a thing for Braulio. She’ll be there to catch him if (when?) Lolita decides she can’t leave Elisa unprotected.
Disgusto has swallowed Carmina’s lies whole and now vomits them back at Elisa. But Blanca comes to Elisa’s defense: How can he believe those atrocities?
Elisa tells her father she was just trying to escape Orangina’s beating. Disgusto refuses to talk to his daughter.
“Papito...” she begins pleadingly.
“Vete a la casa” he barks.
Outside, Gabino hits on Antonia. She flicks him off like a cootie. Which he is.
In the Health Center, Doctor Blabbermouth advises Augie to hold off on telling Carmina she can’t have another baby. He needs to wait for the right moment. (Like maybe when she's in four-point restraints?) He admits that crib death is something they don’t really understand.
At the cemetery, Elisa places a white rose on her mother’s austere (or should we say "neglected") grave.
Doc Blabbermouth goes home and blabbers to Begoña that Carmina’s baby is dead. Begoña is so OMG impactada that she stops painting her toenails and picks up the Alfie Hotline to spread the word.
The gravedigger prepares the earth to receive another body. Elisa stands apart and watches. Augusto places a cross at the gravesite.
Tal para Cual
Alfie slips quietly into Carmina’s room. “I heard what happened to your son” she says icily. The Widow is Whack.
“Well guess what, Miss Churchypants, I don’t believe in that crap so your words don’t hurt me” retorts the blighted grapefruit.
“Then let me put it in terms you can understand” says the widow Arango: La naturaleza se está encargando de que les Bouvier desaparezcan para siempre. (Nature is seeing to it that the Bouviers disappear forever).
When her father leaves the gravesite, Elisa walks over and places a flower on the newly piled earth. Then she traces in the dirt with her finger: H E R M A N I T O.
Carmina boasts that the Bouviers will keep on keeping on:
“El que haya perdido a un hijo no quiere decir que no puedo tener más.” (Just because I lost a child doesn’t mean I can’t have more.)
“Oh, didn’t they tell you?” asks Alfie with the casual cruelty that only a born sadist can affect. “You can’t get pregnant again.”
"Estás vacía, seca; nunca vas a saber lo que es ser madre." (You are empty, barren; you’ll never know what it is to be a mother.)
Mission accomplished. Alfie leaves.
Carmina crumples. She may feel she has hit bottom. But she hasn’t.
Gabino is trying to help her along though. He rides up to Augusto and after a cursory offer of condolences he says coolly: “The baby you buried wasn’t your son.”
“How the hell do you know?”
“Just ask your wife ... the father was someone very close to you – but you’ll never be able to accuse him of anything. And one more thing – if you say we talked, I’ll deny it.”
Night falls in La Ermita
Antonia douses herself with perfume and ambushes Braulio on his way home, inviting him for coffee. He turns her down politely – it would get him in trouble now that Lolita has agreed to marry him!
Antonia is left alone. Her eyes brim with tears
Augusto returns to the Health Center and finds Carmina’s bed empty. No one knows where she is. She certainly hasn’t been discharged.
Elisa comes home to Lolita – at this point, Lolita IS Elisa’s home -- and brings her up to date on the latest tragedy (the baby is dead), atrocity (Tía Meana says she murdered the baby and pushed her into the pool) and petty cruelty (the baby’s grave is far removed from her mother’s. Why? Her mother could have taken care of him.)
Crazy, stricken Carmina staggers down the street, holding onto buildings to keep her balance.
Disgusto rides on horseback searching those same streets for crazy Car.
Paloma walks along with her basket of pan dulce. Gabino bumps into her, stares at her creepily, and tells her she looks just like her mother, Remedios. Only Remedios wasn’t as cute. Paloma is surprised that he knew her mother. Did he know her father? No, says Gabino. He left town. “You mean he’s not dead?” “He might be around” smirks Gabino. “You never know. He might be watching you.”
Then Gabino spots Antonia sitting alone and heads over to her.
BFFs Alfie and Begoña stroll and Alfie brags about drawing blood from an orange. She won’t tolerate any deviance from her idea of morality. Begoña’s kind of worried that Doc Blabbermouth will find out she was Alfie’s source. If that happens, says the pillar of virtue, just deny it. Asunto arreglado.
Now Begoña catches sight of Alfie’s servant, Antonia, sitting in public. At night. With a man. What a scandal! Alfie denies it. Hah! The woman may look like Antonia, but she’s clearly someone else. Asunto arreglado.
Gabino is working pretty hard to capture non-Antonia’s interest. Why is she stuck on Braulio? She should aim higher. He, Gabino, is the boss at the procesadora. And yes, he IS the marrying kind!
Disgusto gives up the search and comes home only to find Carmina in bed. She left the hospital to forget what happened, she says.
Does she mean forget what happened with the baby? Or what happened before when she got involved with him so he’d marry her? Because Gabino Mendoza told him the baby wasn’t his.
Avances: Augusto tells Carmina he knows Rosendo fathered the baby. Carmina points a rifle at Gabino
Labels: abismo
Friday, March 23, 2012
La Que No Podía Amar #62 Thursday 3/22/12 The Woman Who Couldn't Stop Whining
Unfortunately, there are several tonight.
Ulises is so happy to see Macaria back…cause he doesn't know she slept with his "amigo" Efrain. Maripaz doesn't seem too concerned when she finds out that no, Ulises, didn't ask her to come back.
Ana Paula goes to whine to Rogelio about wanting to tell off Cinthia. "Please don't leave me alone out on the terrace without you!" Rog says he won't do it again, and asks her to sit down. He wants to talk about how she's getting along with Gustavo, since he's going to be a part of the family soon. He wants to show her something, but she whines about not wanting any more presents. Shut. Up. If you don't want them, I'll take them! It's Miguel's pardon from David. She asks how Rog got him to sign it, but Rog won't tell. "I want you to know I'd do anything to make you smile."
Dany goes running to show Rosaura the pardon. She's the one who made copies for Rogelio to give one to Ana Paula. Rosaura whines about how AP is making her life so complicated, not falling for her sugar daddy. Dany goes off to show the papers to Miguel while Rosaura ponders how she can keep Bruno from doing stuff behind her back. Yeah, good luck with that one.
AP acknowledges that Rogelio does know what makes her happy. He says it can be like that for the rest of their life. She wants to go show the papers to Miguel, but he tells her that he already sent Dany to do it. Maria interrupts their moment to tell him that the feed supplier is there. AP leaves and Rogelio whines to Maria about how he just can't get AP to love him. Don't worry Rog…you've got lots of love for the Rogelianas. If you can't be with the one you love, honey….
Dany goes to Miguel's room and sees him putting the comb he made for Consuelo in Consuelo's hair. Which is, admittedly, a fairly intimate thing to be doing. She ends up going back out into the hallway to cry over him for the umpteenth time. Hugo sees her and she whines to him about how much it hurts, while he tells her she needs a guy who knows how to appreciate her. Yes, damnit, Dany, listen to the man! Hugo kisses her and Dany's brilliant response is to ask "What are you doing?" To which I replied, verbally, and a high volume, "What the hell do you think he's doing?!" It's ok. I'm fine now. Moving on. Hugo says he just couldn't help himself. She's all hot and sad and Miguel won't give her the time of day. He knows he's just a peon and Miguel's the boss' brother, but at least he doesn't drink (sad when that's a selling point) and he's a hard worker. Sounds good to me. I say go for it!
Mercedes arrives at the hacienda. Oh. Goody. And Ana Paula is the first person to run into her. Mercedes thinks AP is there looking for Gustavo. She tells her to go away and leave Gustavo alone. Maria overhears, applies the quadratic equation, and finds out that where AP, Cinthia, and Mercedes are A, B, and C…Gustavo is X.
Consuelo, now with her hair down, asks Miguel which side the comb looks better on, but just like a guy he says she looks good either way. And he won't charge her for the comb, either.
Out in the hallway, Hugo continues plighting his troth. He sees Dany like a queen…he's interrupted mid-troth (or is it mid-plight?) by Consuelo carrying out the tray. She shows off her new 'do to Dany, who snidely tells her she sees that Miguel finished her comb. "Enjoy it." Whoa, now! You don't have to be that way about it!
Mercedes continues her screeching. Jacinto comes up to ask "Mrs. Montero" if she needs anything. Maria keeps listening in as AP tells Jacinto she's fine, puts up with more verbal lashings from Mercedes, and explains that it's Gustavo who's going to end up getting hurt if Mercedes decides to run her mouth.
Consuelo is shocked at Dany's attitude. "I just wanted to show you what Miguel made. He did a good job, right? I told him he should make more of them to sell. Talk him into it, won't you?" Hugo, meanwhile, has run off. Dany has to stop and contemplate their illicit liplock. Come on, girl, it was hot, you know it!
AP tells Mercedes she can't explain it now, but she begs Mercedes not to say anything. Mercedes' continued ranting can be summed up as, "You're a whore, you never loved my brother, you're a whore, the sooner everyone finds out you're a whore, the better…and oh, yeah, you're a whore!" AP just tells her not to say anything until she's had a chance to talk to her brother. She reminds her that Gustavo is with Cinthia now, so what's the point of blabbing? Maria interrupts them to greet Mercedes and AP takes the opportunity to slip away. Cinthia then comes running in, leaving Maria to go after AP.
AP tries to talk dinner plans with Maria, but she wants to talk about Gustavo. Maria tells her she heard the whole conversation. AP swears she's only been trying to avoid problems. "You're worried about Gustavo and not Rogelio! How do you think he's going to feel when he finds out? Are you still in love with Gustavo?" AP says she's not sure about anything anymore.
Cinthia is burbling about how great she feels. Mercedes asks where Gustavo is. "Um, he went down the river to measure something? I don't know." Mercedes claims to be tired from the trip and Cinthia takes her to her room.
Maria really needs to know Qué The Hell is going on! AP gives her the CliffsNotes version. Mr. 5ft pauses in the act of serving me some salt and lime flavor tortilla chips to remark, "Moan and whine, moan and whine," which I'm afraid, when all is said and done, is going to be all that happens this episode. She gets to the important stuff…"Did you do the nasty with him?" AP admits she did. What she actually says is, "ya fui su mujer," "I was his woman." How very 19th century of you, AP.
Oh, look, the opening credits. 20 minutes in. Pfft!
Ulises wants to spoil Macaria. Maripaz whines that she wants some spoiling too. Really, though, all she wants is to go to school. Ulises demands she review the accounting first. Efrain walks into the fonda and takes a table. He insists on trying to make a date with Macaria, but she doesn't want to see him again. "Hey, we had a good time, didn't we?" She makes that "I don't want to say yes, but I don't want to lie, either face." Come on, seriously? If she woke up in bed with him and didn't remember why he was there, he couldn't have been that good.
AP tells Maria that Federico supported her relationship with Gustavo. So freaking what? AP cries and whines that she's so confused, she has so many doubts, she realizes Rogelio loves her. "I don't want to lie to him, but I can't tell him I love Gustavo!" Maria reads her the riot act for sleeping with Gustavo while she's married to Rogelio. "And then there's the fainting thing…are you pregnant?" Dun, dun, dun!
Rosaura tells Miguel about the pardon. He hugs her and says he doesn't have to hide from the cops anymore. Well, there are still other charges. Rosaura offers him some advice, "I think you should break it off with Dany, but for realz this time." Miguel is apparently no better at breaking up with someone than he is at dating. Rosaura wants him to keep Dany out of his room. She's distracted in her advice-giving by the arrival of Vanessa, in peep toe heels and a silver tank dress. Very appropriate for a hacienda. Rosaura tries to physically block her from entering the building, much to Vanessa's amusement. Rosaura tries to thrown her out, but Cintha comes up with …dun, dun, dun…Mercedes.
Maria hopes AP isn't pregnant. A baby would be a tragedy! AP says she doesn't know how, but she'll make sure Rogelio doesn't ever find out. "Are you sure you can handle seeing Cinthia with that guy?" AP says she can't ruin everyone's lives. Maria says she's such a good girl, it's unfair for her to be going through this. AP doesn't want to hurt Rogelio, but she can't love him either. She's living a nightmare! Maria hopes nothing terrible happens. Greeeeeat. I'm pretty sure something terrible's going to happen.
Cinthia insists that Vanessa is allowed in the hacienda whenever she wants. She notices Rosaura staring at Mercedes, so she introduces them, saying Rosaura's Paula's moocher aunt. Vanessa takes the liberty of introducing Miguel, the delinquent brother. The mean girls go off to braid each other's hair while posting nasty shit about Ana Paula on Facebook. Rosaura hisses to Miguel that they have to warn Ana Paula that Mercedes is there.
Ana Paula sobs to herself. Margarito comes up and joins the pity party. He thinks they're not going to keep looking for his parents, and what about Gustavo, etc., etc., etc. I think AP's been a bad influence on this kid. Now Rosaura comes running up to announce that Mercedes is at the hacienda. "Oh, that's so five minutes ago!" Rosaura is pissed that no one's keeping her informed! AP apologizes, saying she's having a rather crappy day herself. She walks off while Rosaura stews.
Cinthia announces Vanessa's arrival to Rogelio. He says he'll see her in a minute. Cinthia leaves and Rogelio calls Hugo. "Tell my wife to come here and to come in through the main door."
Consuelo tells Miguel to tell her a joke so he'll quit thinking about drinking. Efrain comes up and tries to flirt with her. Miguel asks if he's coming back to work there. "Of course. As soon as the boss realizes he can't run the place without me." Efrain tries to get Consuelo to go with him, but she says no, she's staying with Miguel.
Vanessa's been busy filling Mercedes' head with even more crap about Ana Paula.
Rogelio tries calling Abel, but has to leave a message. AP comes in and Rogelio notices she's been crying. He tells her that Vanessa is there, and he wants to make sure that he gives Ana Paula her place, so he'd like her to be there for the meeting as well.
Rosaura, that godawful tacky BITCH, hauls Margarito around by the ear and verbally pounds it into his head that he's nobody, just an orphan, and when Ana Paula leaves she's not taking Margarito with her and he's going to be alone…got it! Bitch made the kid cry. I can't even call that tacky…it's just plain cruel.
Vanessa is unpleasantly surprised when Ana Paula comes into Rog's office.
Margarito, Rosaura's words echoing in his ears, climbs the trellis, but loses his grip at the top and falls from at least 1 story…with his back half on and half off the concrete patio below.
Efrain, having failed with Consuelo, tries to get under Cinthia's skin. He tries to blackmail her into convincing Rogelio to give him his job back.
Margarito cries for Paula to come help him.
Cinthia says if he rats her out to Rogelio, Rogelio will kill him! Efrain tries to say he came back for her, but Cinthia won't hear it. She says it was fun while it lasted, but now it's over. Efrain is willing to go to Rogelio with "proof"…he knows the location of certain birthmarks that Cinthia has. And he doesn't care if Rogelio kills him, because then he'd be rid of his obsession for Cinthia.
AP tries to take notes on the meeting, but Vanessa says "everyone" already knows how the whole process works, so she might as well stop taking notes. AP insists she wants to learn, so Rogelio tells her that he'll explain it later. Vanessa leaves and runs into Cinthia, on her way in to plead for Efrain's job back. But neither her pleading, nor AP's can get Rogelio to change his mind. He won't talk to Efrain and that's his final word on the subject. Cinthia storms out and AP tries to ask Rogelio why he won't at least talk to Efrain. Rogelio explains that she really needs to quit cutting his balls off in front of the help.
Consuelo and Maria find Margarito. He's hurting all over and won't let them move him.
AP says if she has to be a "yes" woman, they're not going to be able to make this work. Maria comes running in, screaming that Margarito fell of the trellis and he can't get up.
Cinthia comes storming into the living room, bitching about Rogelio not wanting to do a favor for her. She tries to give Vanessa the "clean" version of the story about Efrain's firing. Vanessa comes back bitching about how AP was in on their business meeting, taking notes. Cinthia says AP thinks she'll get her hands on everything, but she'd rather see the hacienda fail before letting AP get her hands on it. And that, right there, is why Rogelio really shouldn't be handing over her half of the hacienda. She doesn't seem to realize that if the hacienda's reputation is hurt, her "half" won't be worth anything either. Dumbass!
Rogelio tells them not to move Margarito. He tells AP to go on ahead while he calls for a helicopter and a portable x-ray machine.
Efrain is in the kitchen, stewing. Cinthia says Rogelio won't talk to him. He bitches about how things could be different if she'd fight for what's hers. He'll keep quiet for now, but he's not going to let things rest indefinitely.
Ernesto calls Mercedes to whine. She says there's been an accident and she needs him.
AP tries to calm Margarito down. It's hurting everywhere and he's having trouble moving his fingers without pain.
Later, the EMTs are leaving and AP tells them she'll show the x-rays to the doctor and not to worry, there are two nurses in the house to take care of Margarito. They leave and Mercedes takes this opportunity to needle AP some more. "Oh, right, you're a nurse. Let's see, if I remember correctly, you didn't actually work as a nurse very long before you married your sugar daddy." You wanna do this now, right now? You smug, self-righteous bitch! Don’t even get me started on how much of this mess is your fault! AP says she doesn't need to discuss it with her. She claims it's her love for Margarito that will make her the best nurse for him. Is that the best argument you can come up with? Mercedes doesn't think AP is capable of loving anyone. AP says, whatever, thanks for getting the specialist here, even if you don't like me. Mercedes says it was Rogelio who got the helicopter. Well, she'd better go down and wait for Ernesto to arrive. Margarito's lying in bed with a cervical collar.
Mercedes finally sees Gustavo, who's happy to see her. "Why didn't you tell me Ana was here?" He didn't want to argue about it anymore. Mercedes asks if he really likes Cinthia…"Please don't get in the middle of this! And don't tell anyone about me and Ana. I'm here for Cinthia." Mercedes doesn't think Cinthia is going to take it well when she finds out. Cinthia comes up, whining to Gustavo about how the whole house is turned upside down because of some stupid orphan kid. "Margarito?!" She tones it down when she realizes Gustavo likes the kid. Ernesto comes up and Mercedes is happy to see him. "Well, how could I not come when you'd asked me?" I roll my eyes at you. All of you. No one escapes my eye rolling!
Rogelio doesn't like seeing Margarito like this. He'd rather he be running around. Ernesto comes in and is introduced to Rogelio. AP hands over the x-rays and he takes a look. He sighs heavily and asks to be left alone with the patient.
AP paces in Rogelio's office. "There's no doubt that your life can change in a moment." Rogelio snorts, "You're telling me." AP tells him to wait and see what the doctor says. Ernesto comes in and says they need to let the swelling go down before they'll know, but yes, it's possible that Margarito could be paralyzed. Rogelio flips his wig.
Tomorrow: Cinthia tries to eat Gustavo's face; Mercedes whines; AP and Gustavo get busted hugging in the hallway by Cinthia.
Labels: no-podia
Abismo de pasión #9 3/23/12: Hell is the truth learned too late*
*Agatha Christie
Redux: At Casa Castañon we get to see Ughusto wimphandle Fina out the door.
Ughusto agonizes over his missing daughter. Lolita has the idea that maybe Elisa’s friend Paloma might know Elisa’s whereabouts. Carmeany wants to slip into something orange and go with Ughusto to the yerberia but he rebuffs her, “This is between me and my daughter.”
Over at Hell House Antonia is already in orange and listening to Padre Loopy who isn’t happy with the way Fina is mistreating her son. Just then the Hot Nasty (Gabino) precedes the Cold Nasty (Fina) into the room; Fina runs to Loopy and weeps, “That girl stole my son just like Stef stole Rosendo”. (Geez lady, give the broken record a rest, willya? Let’s do a short-cut code so I don’t have to write this out every time. Whenever Fina cries this old saw I’ll write “Alf makes me ralph”.) Loopy gives the over-the-shoulder “She be carayzee!” look. Gabino, settling into his role as head suck-up, volunteers to call the police and look for the kids himself. He has the word “Jackal” embroidered on the back of his shirt. Hey, wasn’t Blue Lass calling for jackals to consume Carmeany?
Over at the yerberia Ramona suspects that Paloma is nervous about something because she breaks a plate. Ramona accuses her of having manos de hilacha (hands of lint). What’s Paloma hiding? Just then Augusto literally bursts through the door and asks Paloma if she knows where Elisa is. (I love how Ramona rushes to protect Paloma.) Paloma says she knows Elisa and Damian but she doesn’t know where they are. Amazingly, Augusto behaves himself and leaves. Ramona, however doesn’t believe her granddaughter.
Augusto stands outside Ramona’s house and hollers for Elisa. Too little too late a$$ hat. Gabino lurks nearby and hides in the bushes.
The kiddies are in the cave and Elisa is afraid. Damian hugs and comforts her, awwww.
Next morning a lovely green reptile suns itself on a rock. (Ooooh, I just love reptiles and amphibians! More please, just don’t kill them.) When Paloma sleepily heads to the river for water The Jackal leaps out and captures her. He is momentarily stunned by her eyes , “they look like hers” (squeeeee [™Sara], call of the blood?) but he shakes it off and demands she tell him where the runaways are.
Well, they are likely enjoying their last happy morning for a long time. They prepare to leave the cave and GAH!!! The Hot Nasty sneers “Good morning...niños.” Busted by Gabino the Jackal.
Gael, the most sensible and mature person in this mess, prays to the Virgin to protect his little friends.
Alf makes me ralph. (It’s short-cut code, remember?)
Just as Fina wonders if she will ever see her son again Gabino arrives at Hell House with the boy booty. Fina slobbers all over him. Ruh roh, in walks Elisa, Fina lunges and SLAPP!!!! (™Marta) she sends the child reeling. Luckily Padre Loopy runs over and pulls Fina off poor Elisa and yells at her to control herself! Damian is yelling too and I notice Gabino smirking in the background.
Alf makes me ralph.
Alf makes me ralph. (really, one right after the other)
Then, crazed and wild-eyed, Fina announces they are leaving La Ermita right away. She orders Gabino to remove Elisa but Loopy jumps in to save her. Damian and Elisa sadly gaze at each other. “I hate you!! I hate you!!” Damian yells at his mother as Antonia drags him off to pack his bags.
Ramona notices that Paloma’s arms are bruised. When Paloma admits it was Gabino forcing the truth from her Ramona freaks and tells Paloma that hiding the truth is as bad or worse than lying. Paloma promises to never lie to her again.
The padre has delivered Elisa to Casa Castañon. Lucio and Blanca say they hope Augusto will go easy on the girl because he and Carmina are to blame for her running away. Hooray Lucio! Anita, roll out the I Heart Lucio shirts. Carmeany looks all huffy and Lady of the Manorish. She tries to take Elisa’s hand but Elisa rejects her and asks Lolita to take her to her room. Padre wants to talk to Ughusto alone. The Cheddar Cheese stands alone.
Padre also pleads Elisa’s case to Ughusto. She’s only a child, she lost her mother and can’t understand why Bad Hair Dad married the harridan, nor for that matter can the Padre. Augusto pleads insanity and Padre gives him the 411, Elisa doesn’t really like her Tia, doesn’t trust her. Augusto, in a rare (and all too brief) moment of lucidity, asks Padre Loopy if he knows something that Augusto does not. Padre assures him that Stef and Rosendo were NOT lovers. Ughie surmises Padre must have heard something in confession and P Loopy reminds Ughie he cannot divulge what is confessed. Oops, stupid Ughie is back and says Stef was a hypocrite who fooled the Padre and everyone else. Disgusted, Padre says Ughusto has committed a grave error by marrying Carmina.
Oh this is gonna be good. Gabino is rudely shouting orders to the peones and Ramona strides up looking like the tree hugger’s poster child. But she’s got the habanero fire in her eyes, calls him out and demands he never bother or touch her grandchild again. He attempts bravado and tells her to back off before she has a heart attack, but she scoffs and says she won’t let him harm her grandchild like he did her daughter. She doesn’t have the reputation as a witch for nuthin’ and she can damage him! Then she gives him the single-raised-eyebrow stinkeye. Yay Ramona! (And did y’all see those big bags of habaneros? Eat your heart out Ughusto.)
Padre Loopy gently tells Gael that his friends were found but bad news, Damian’s mom plans to take him far away and he doesn’t know when he will come back. The poor little guy cries hard.
Fina shows up at the hot sauce factory and barks orders at Gabino to get things ready for her trip to the Merida airport. He hems and haws and asks if she arranged what she promised? She tells him to wait in the office.
Lucio also shows up at the office and wonders what smug Gabino is doing sitting in the boss’s chair acting like he’s the in charge of the world. Fina arrives and fires Lucio and makes Gabino the boss. Well, not fires, she says, she’s just expediting his retirement. After all his years of service he’s old and needs a rest. Gabino, his nose a dark shade of brown, smirks in the background. Gabino tries some post-promotion sucking up but Fina takes the wind out of his sails by reminding him he is just an employee and nothing more.
Carmeany finds Lolita packing up Stef’s clothes to take to another room. Lolita says there is something weird, nothing of Stef’s is missing and everything is in its place. If Stef was running away wouldn’t she have taken something? Car thinks fast and says Rosendo was rolling in the dough and probably planned to buy Stef new clothes. Lolita says she smells a rat. Carmeany suggests Lolita check the jewelry box and we are assaulted by Fur Elise. Stef wasn’t stupid and took her jewelry with her, she says. (Unfound at the crash site I might add.) “Satisfied?” hisses Carmina. Lolita looks anything but.
The two sweet boys are saying their goodbyes in Damien’s room, best friends forever, secret handshake, and Damian asks Gael to give the amulet to Elisa, Damian will wear its twin. The kids barely get their goodbye hug in before mom-from-hell says enough of the stupid goodbyes, get this brat outta here, we’re leaving.
Lolita is stashing Stef’s clothes in Carmeany’s old room when she runs across Stef’s jewelry. Carmeany walks in and laughs, Ha ha ha those are actually CARMEANY’S jewels, not Stef’s. Their father always bought them identical jewelry. Lolita doesn’t buy it, she saw Stef wearing them many times. Meany snatches them away and says she doesn’t have to give excuses to a mere servant. Lolita starts working things out in her head, first Carmeany said Stef took the jewels, and now they end up in Carmeany’s room, also the police never returned any jewelry from the crash. Lolita says she’s wanted to leave many times but she sticks around for her Elisa. Car hisses if Lolita wants to stay then she’d better watch what she does and says and quit rummaging around with things that don’t belong to her. Car goes all psycho bug eyes, gathers up all the other jewelry she’s got stashed around the room and locks it in a drawer.
As Paloma and Elisa walk along the road Gael runs to join them. He has the special amulet from Damian that Elisa is to wear always. Gael tells them that Gabino and Hell Mom are taking Damian away as they speak, so the three pals form a human barricade across the road which, knowing Vampira, is a pretty stupid thing to do. Gabino stops, “The brats are in the road”, he says. “Run them down!” commands the Dark One, hoping to traumatize her child forever. Luckily the children fling themselves off to the side. Damian yells out the window, “Elisa, I’ll be your friend forever!” “Me too!”, yells Elisa.
Ughusto comes home to his pathetically obsessive wife. She slurps his face and gushes she is so glad their lives have returned to normal. “Normal???” he says, “nothing that’s happened is normal. I think our marriage was a mistake.” Carmeany ignores his concerns and plays octopussy as she wraps her eight arms around him. She gushes about THEIR baby and he just looks shell-shocked. He is such a tool.
Months Later:
Carmelon shows off her big impregnated belly to her mirror reflection, but guess what? Ughusto is still not terribly interested. Car, I admire your tenacity but your taste in men absolutely sucks. You ruined your sister’s reputation and committed all sorts of hell-guaranteeing subterfuge for this waste product? Car gushes about the baby wanting to be born any minute. Augusto, who has a head for math at least up to the number 10, observes the baby won’t be born for at least a few more weeks and she should see the doctor. He wants to go with her because he ALWAYS went with Estefania. “Well stop comparing me to Estefania, I want to go solo” she says. Fine, he says, he'll go play with his habaneros while she gets all hormonal.
The Only Gossip in town tells the Biggest Beeyatch in town that she suspects Carmeany’s spawn was conceived before her marriage. And...Alf makes me ralph.
Over at Casa Castañon Lolita stands by the beautiful pool and tells Braulio to clean the water and make sure everything is perfect for Elisa’s pool-party. Carmelon walks up and asks since when does Dolores (i.e. Lolita) give orders? Carmelon has a marvelous idea, she orders Braulio to empty the pool immediately, empty it right now so as to ruin Elisa’s party. Wheee, it’s so much fun being bat-s**t crazy!
As Carmelon stalks away from the pool she is intercepted by Gabino, who has apparently not changed his shirt despues meses. Uh oh, he has a ponytail. Didn’t someone warn us about a ponytail? Guess what? He wants to blackmail her. She threatens to kill him. He licks his lips like wants to jackalize her. I think they should both do what they want immediately.
Now we are in Blanca’s store; she’s happy having earned lots of money for a custom dress. Lucio is feeling habanero-withered (™Novela Maven) because he’s helping and has a tape-measure around his neck, pobrecito. His world is the earth, fertilizer and habaneros, not the whims of women!
Ughusto is tying one on at the local cantina when Lucio walks in. Luc says at least he’s “retired”, what’s Ugh’s excuse for drinking? More about Elisa being a kid who needs her father. Ugh talks about his expected son, slams down a shot of tequila, says at least the baby will make all this worthwhile, and leaves. Lucio raises his bodacious eyebrows and snarks “Cheers Augusto.”
The only doc in town has examined Carmelon, says it’s a matter of days, and is clearly enchanted by what he saw (Ick, or I don’t know, or whatever) because he is totally hitting on her. She wants to make sure he never told anyone she was preggers before she was married, right? Because she’s so completely happy now. He gazes at her like he’ll do whatever she wants as long as it involves future boinkage.
Oh give me a break, Gabino is in the cantina trying to ruin Lucio’s night again. He announces that this cantina is for MACHOS, not [bleep] like Lucio who like to make dresses. (I wonder what got censored?) UPDATE: Gabino called Lucio a mariquita, i.e. poofter. He starts bragging about being Uno Macho just because he brown-nosed Lucio out of a job. I think they should just whip out their manhoods and compare, I’ll bet Lucio’s is much more impressive than the steroid-swilling Gabino’s. Lucio stands up and literally punches the snot out of Gabino, pretty much proving my theory.
Evil Stepmother finds Elisa happily burbling with her dolls and her future little brother’s things. She shrieks and grabs Elisa, telling her to stay away from Her Son’s clothes! Elisa wails he’s also her little brother. Carmeany starts strangling Elisa and insulting Stef, but the child rebels, screams and runs out of the house near the EMPTIED pool. Carmelon runs after her, yelling she’ll teach the demon child a lesson and demanding her baby’s things back. Carmelon momentarily teeters at the pool’s edge before taking a header right into the emptied-as-ordered pool and falling flat on her cantaloupe. Sorry bingo players, she missed the steps entirely.
Avances: Carweenie wails to Rosendo in her delerium. Disgusto hears and has doubts (serves you right dumba**). No little brother for Elisa.
Labels: abismo
Una Familia Con Suerte #175-176 Thu 3/22/12 Marriage is a wonderful institution, and all our married couples belong in an institution.
Except maybe the latest newlyweds!
*Fernanda’s boudoir*
Chela: Here, Fernie dear, let me jury-rig some tacky straps onto this dress for your wedding.
Ana: Chicken Little and I are gettin’ hitched!
Chela and Fernanda: The sky is falling!
Ana: Chicken Little and I are gettin’ hitched!
Chela and Fernanda: The sky is falling!
*Da hood*
Frida: Champi is one smokin’ hot hunk o’ metal.
Freddy, via phone: Pepe! Let’s go shopping!
Frida: I know lots about cars. Take me for a ride!
Pepe: Vroom.
Frida: Champi is one smokin’ hot hunk o’ metal.
Freddy, via phone: Pepe! Let’s go shopping!
Frida: I know lots about cars. Take me for a ride!
Pepe: Vroom.
*Highway*
Frida: Is this as fast as Champi can go? Show me what she’s got, and please note that I equate her velocity with your manliness. Impress me.
Pepe: Vroom vroom.
Frida: Is this as fast as Champi can go? Show me what she’s got, and please note that I equate her velocity with your manliness. Impress me.
Pepe: Vroom vroom.
*Avon*
Vice: Nice shirt, cheesy chump.
Pancho: I’m made of rubber and you’re made of glue.
Vice: So I talked to that loser Lamberto…
Rebers: You leave him alone!
Vice: Lamby and Rebers, sittin’ in a tree. I’m calling an emergency meeting to over throw you all!
Pancho: You do that. Gotta go.
Pina: Vice, your tacky childish insults make me swoon!
Vice: Let’s do it in the elevator!
Vice: Nice shirt, cheesy chump.
Pancho: I’m made of rubber and you’re made of glue.
Vice: So I talked to that loser Lamberto…
Rebers: You leave him alone!
Vice: Lamby and Rebers, sittin’ in a tree. I’m calling an emergency meeting to over throw you all!
Pancho: You do that. Gotta go.
Pina: Vice, your tacky childish insults make me swoon!
Vice: Let’s do it in the elevator!
*Church*
Ana: Frida, let’s be friends!
Kari: Clever of me to wait until everyone expected the bride and make a grand entrance down the aisle to sit with the family!
Fernanda: I am so blindingly happy, I don’t even care that my son is an annoying nutcase.
Enzo: Who cares if I look like a Mafioso? I look guapisimo in all black.
Ana: Frida, let’s be friends!
Kari: Clever of me to wait until everyone expected the bride and make a grand entrance down the aisle to sit with the family!
Fernanda: I am so blindingly happy, I don’t even care that my son is an annoying nutcase.
Enzo: Who cares if I look like a Mafioso? I look guapisimo in all black.
*Casa Irabién*
Ado: Bye, Mamación! I will miss you so much!
Ado: Bye, Mamación! I will miss you so much!
*Church*
Priest: Wuv, twoo wuv…
All the happy couples: Sigh!
Freddy: Let me formally propose and proffer an engagement ring right in the middle of someone else’s wedding.
Ana: Swoon!
Pina: OMG!
Vice: NOOOOOO!!!!!!
Everyone: Huh?
Big kerfuffle; Pina faints.
Priest: Wuv, twoo wuv…
All the happy couples: Sigh!
Freddy: Let me formally propose and proffer an engagement ring right in the middle of someone else’s wedding.
Ana: Swoon!
Pina: OMG!
Vice: NOOOOOO!!!!!!
Everyone: Huh?
Big kerfuffle; Pina faints.
*Casa Irabién*
Pina: What happened?
Freddy, Vice, Arnold Flowerz, Kari, Ado: You made a big embarrassing scene in the church.
Pina: Say it ain’t so! You aren’t marrying that piojosa!
Pina: What happened?
Freddy, Vice, Arnold Flowerz, Kari, Ado: You made a big embarrassing scene in the church.
Pina: Say it ain’t so! You aren’t marrying that piojosa!
*Church, sans the troublemakers*
Priest: Okey-doke, you’re now hitched.
SMOOCH.
Priest: Okey-doke, you’re now hitched.
SMOOCH.
*Casa Lopez*
Ana: Wheee! Pollis proposed and I accepted!
Pancho: HAHAHAHAHA!!! You’re kidding, right?!
Ana: Wheee! Pollis proposed and I accepted!
Pancho: HAHAHAHAHA!!! You’re kidding, right?!
*Casa Irabién*
Freddy: No, I’m not kidding.
Vice: The thought of becoming related to that chica makes me wanna barf!
Freddy: You’re already related to her, remember?
Pina: What are you thinking? Can I upsell you on this blue-eyed model conveniently in stock RIGHT HERE because she never leaves?
Freddy: No, I’m not kidding.
Vice: The thought of becoming related to that chica makes me wanna barf!
Freddy: You’re already related to her, remember?
Pina: What are you thinking? Can I upsell you on this blue-eyed model conveniently in stock RIGHT HERE because she never leaves?
*Casa Lopez*
Enzo: Vice and Pincenez will probably cut off Freddy’s allowance.
Elena: Bwahahahaha!!!
Pancho: You don’t need their money. You’re too young, but what the heck, you have my blessing. Since you’re going to do it anyway.
Enzo: Vice and Pincenez will probably cut off Freddy’s allowance.
Elena: Bwahahahaha!!!
Pancho: You don’t need their money. You’re too young, but what the heck, you have my blessing. Since you’re going to do it anyway.
*Casa Irabién*
Pina: I am a raging racist classist! You marry that naca, and we will cut you off!
Pina: I am a raging racist classist! You marry that naca, and we will cut you off!
*Avon*
Rebers: Stop being so tacky and put on proper business clothes for the meeting.
Pancho: Tacky is just who I am, babe.
Rebers: Stop being so tacky and put on proper business clothes for the meeting.
Pancho: Tacky is just who I am, babe.
*Conference room*
Lamberto: Raymundo is now going to referee the meetings.
Raymundo: Arnoldo! Slobber!
Enter Enzo.
Raymundo: Even better! Slobber!
Lamberto: Raymundo is now going to referee the meetings.
Raymundo: Arnoldo! Slobber!
Enter Enzo.
Raymundo: Even better! Slobber!
*Casa Lopez*
Ana: Frida is so cool…yet so hot for you!
Pepe: Sheesh. We just work together.
Frida, via phone: I need your expert studly help to fix this car!
Pepe: Later. I have to go to school.
Frida: Le sigh, le heave.
Ana: Frida is so cool…yet so hot for you!
Pepe: Sheesh. We just work together.
Frida, via phone: I need your expert studly help to fix this car!
Pepe: Later. I have to go to school.
Frida: Le sigh, le heave.
*Avon conference room*
All the execs: much shouting over personal issues.
Raymundo: This is not on the agenda.
All the execs: much shouting over personal issues.
Raymundo: This is not on the agenda.
*Fantasy scene, lucha libre ring*
Lamberto is the announcer. Vice is “El demonio.” Arnold Flowers goes by his own name, in a yellow cape and ruffly bellbottoms. Pina is dressed as Wonder Woman and is “Cruella de Ville.” Enzo is “Descuartizador” and hot. Rebe is “La diva.” Pancho is “El preciso.” Much cartoonish fighting. This must have been a hoot to film.
Lamberto is the announcer. Vice is “El demonio.” Arnold Flowers goes by his own name, in a yellow cape and ruffly bellbottoms. Pina is dressed as Wonder Woman and is “Cruella de Ville.” Enzo is “Descuartizador” and hot. Rebe is “La diva.” Pancho is “El preciso.” Much cartoonish fighting. This must have been a hoot to film.
*Back to conference room*
Me: Why do they always have cake? Is it the same cake? Why does no one bring me fancy cake?
Pancho: We need to expand internationally.
Vice: I object!
Pancho and Vice: Let’s do all the bickering we should have gotten out of our systems as children.
Pina: I have a wonderful, awful idea.
Me: Why do they always have cake? Is it the same cake? Why does no one bring me fancy cake?
Pancho: We need to expand internationally.
Vice: I object!
Pancho and Vice: Let’s do all the bickering we should have gotten out of our systems as children.
Pina: I have a wonderful, awful idea.
*Casa Lopez*
Ana: I sorta want to keep trying for a music career. But on the other hand…babies! With Pollis!
Chela: What’s the rush? Make sure you have an education and a solid relationship first.
Ana: I sorta want to keep trying for a music career. But on the other hand…babies! With Pollis!
Chela: What’s the rush? Make sure you have an education and a solid relationship first.
*Mobster Mansion*
Nappy: I know everything about your family. But what do you think?
Candy: I think Pancho will get a grip and accept his baby getting married. They’ll be fine.
Deb: Candy, get lost. Private business.
Deb, while Candy hides around the corner: It’s done. Sánchez is dead.
Candy: Gasp!
Napo: If the info on this USB gets out, we’re dead meat. You deserve a prize.
Deb: With six zeros.
Nappy: I know everything about your family. But what do you think?
Candy: I think Pancho will get a grip and accept his baby getting married. They’ll be fine.
Deb: Candy, get lost. Private business.
Deb, while Candy hides around the corner: It’s done. Sánchez is dead.
Candy: Gasp!
Napo: If the info on this USB gets out, we’re dead meat. You deserve a prize.
Deb: With six zeros.
*Avon*
Pancho: You’re totally one of the family again!
Rebers: I object!
Pancho: Let me ram the idea, and my tongue, down your throat.
Rebe: Oh, okay. No! Wait! I’m not that easy, mister!
Pancho: You’re totally one of the family again!
Rebers: I object!
Pancho: Let me ram the idea, and my tongue, down your throat.
Rebe: Oh, okay. No! Wait! I’m not that easy, mister!
Freddy: What my parents do is not my fault.
Pancho: How do you plan to support my daughter? Keep in mind that this is the 1950s, and her job is to have babies and yours is to bring in money, no exceptions.
Freddy: Um, I guess I will work.
Pancho: Well, of course Ana will ask me for money. If I don’t give it to her, she’ll think I oppose your marriage like your parents do! What should I do?
Rebe: Maybe Ana should be part of this conversation.
Pancho: Correct. Come to the house tonight and we’ll discuss the dowry. Ana’s probably only a seven-cow wife.
Pancho: How do you plan to support my daughter? Keep in mind that this is the 1950s, and her job is to have babies and yours is to bring in money, no exceptions.
Freddy: Um, I guess I will work.
Pancho: Well, of course Ana will ask me for money. If I don’t give it to her, she’ll think I oppose your marriage like your parents do! What should I do?
Rebe: Maybe Ana should be part of this conversation.
Pancho: Correct. Come to the house tonight and we’ll discuss the dowry. Ana’s probably only a seven-cow wife.
*Casa Lopez*
Ana: I’m so happy!
Lupita: Yeah, isn’t it great to be in love?
Ana: So how about you?
Lupita: Well, Tomás hasn’t proposed yet.
Ana: All our problems will be over once we’re married!
Lupita: Eh, I doubt it.
Ana: I’m so happy!
Lupita: Yeah, isn’t it great to be in love?
Ana: So how about you?
Lupita: Well, Tomás hasn’t proposed yet.
Ana: All our problems will be over once we’re married!
Lupita: Eh, I doubt it.
*Police academy*
Tomás is busy exercising and practicing subduing criminals.
Tomás is busy exercising and practicing subduing criminals.
*Casa Chela*
Candy: What a beautiful nursery! Have fun dusting it for seven months until your baby is born! Hey, guess what, the mobsters are doing mobster things. There’s a USB I could steal and put them in jail.
Chela: Don’t even think of it! They’ll kill you!
Candy: What a beautiful nursery! Have fun dusting it for seven months until your baby is born! Hey, guess what, the mobsters are doing mobster things. There’s a USB I could steal and put them in jail.
Chela: Don’t even think of it! They’ll kill you!
*La Válvula*
Frida: I am totally cool and competent. Are you in love with me yet?
Pepe, on phone: Moni! Mi amor!
Frida: Rats.
Moni: I need you!
Frida: I am totally cool and competent. Are you in love with me yet?
Pepe, on phone: Moni! Mi amor!
Frida: Rats.
Moni: I need you!
*Avon*
Pina: Here’s my diabolical plan: We invest a little money to revive la piojosa’s vulgar naca musical career and send her on tour. Ha ha!
Pina: Here’s my diabolical plan: We invest a little money to revive la piojosa’s vulgar naca musical career and send her on tour. Ha ha!
*La Válvula*
Frida: Sooo…who’s this Sirenita?
Pepe: The love of my life! She took her nutso mama to France for treatment.
Frida: Wow. They must be rich. Actually, your whole clan seems rich.
Pepe: Well, pops is the president of Avon. But it isn’t my money. I’m working hard to give Moni the lifestyle she insists upon.
Frida: It’ll never be enough. Let’s race our cars!
Frida: Sooo…who’s this Sirenita?
Pepe: The love of my life! She took her nutso mama to France for treatment.
Frida: Wow. They must be rich. Actually, your whole clan seems rich.
Pepe: Well, pops is the president of Avon. But it isn’t my money. I’m working hard to give Moni the lifestyle she insists upon.
Frida: It’ll never be enough. Let’s race our cars!
*Mobster boudoir*
Candy: Look, I’m dressed all seductively. Why don’t I take off your overcoat and hat and sunglasses and you can act like you’re indoors for once?
Nappy: Ohhhh, yeah.
later…Candy: Ha! The fool’s asleep! USB switched, check!
Nappy: Hey! What’s up, and why are you?
Candy: Uhhh…just looking for my phone.
Candy: Look, I’m dressed all seductively. Why don’t I take off your overcoat and hat and sunglasses and you can act like you’re indoors for once?
Nappy: Ohhhh, yeah.
later…Candy: Ha! The fool’s asleep! USB switched, check!
Nappy: Hey! What’s up, and why are you?
Candy: Uhhh…just looking for my phone.
*Casa Froot Loopeez*
Pancho: So the question is, should I give up some cows for a dowry, or not?
Ana: Huh?
Pancho: You haven’t thought this through. How will you support yourselves?
Rebe: There’s no hurry to get married, right? Or is there?
Freddy and Ana: Well…yes, there’s a hurry.
Ana hilariously pats Freddy’s tummy, making Pancho flip out.
Rebe: You should sort things out with your mother before you get married.
Pancho: So the question is, should I give up some cows for a dowry, or not?
Ana: Huh?
Pancho: You haven’t thought this through. How will you support yourselves?
Rebe: There’s no hurry to get married, right? Or is there?
Freddy and Ana: Well…yes, there’s a hurry.
Ana hilariously pats Freddy’s tummy, making Pancho flip out.
Rebe: You should sort things out with your mother before you get married.
*Avon*
Pina and Vins: Wow! Listen to this CD, Mr. Record Exec! Isn’t she awesome! Meet with our beloved niece and surprise her with a deal! But not a word that we were involved!
Pina and Vins: Wow! Listen to this CD, Mr. Record Exec! Isn’t she awesome! Meet with our beloved niece and surprise her with a deal! But not a word that we were involved!
*La Válvula*
Frida: Isn’t it romantic, just the two of us working together late into the evening? Here, have some aphrodisiacal churros y chocolate.
Pepe: Yay, food. Let me catch you up on the whole plot.
Frida: Isn’t it romantic, just the two of us working together late into the evening? Here, have some aphrodisiacal churros y chocolate.
Pepe: Yay, food. Let me catch you up on the whole plot.
*Avon*
Pina: You looked so hot dancing, Vins!
Vins: Let’s do it on the desk!
Pina: You looked so hot dancing, Vins!
Vins: Let’s do it on the desk!
*Chela’s nursery*
Enzo: Let me seduce you with a romantic picnic and lots of flattery and smoldering looks. A toast!
Chela: Yeah, yeah. So what happened with Lidia? Does sex mean nothing to you?
Enzo: It does when I’m in LURVE. What happened with you and Pancho?
Chela: Nada. Really! Are you jealous?
Enzo: Let me seduce you with a romantic picnic and lots of flattery and smoldering looks. A toast!
Chela: Yeah, yeah. So what happened with Lidia? Does sex mean nothing to you?
Enzo: It does when I’m in LURVE. What happened with you and Pancho?
Chela: Nada. Really! Are you jealous?
*La Válvula*
Pepe: I insist on taking you home. It’s too far and too dangerous for you to go alone!
Frida: Swoon! Mi válvula de escape!
Pepe: I insist on taking you home. It’s too far and too dangerous for you to go alone!
Frida: Swoon! Mi válvula de escape!
*Run-down tenement that survived the earthquake that flattened the Casa Popular just fine*
Pepe: So where’s your car?
Frida: I almost never get it out of the garage.
Pepe: Have you thought of selling it so you could live someplace better?
Frida: Never! It’s the only memento I have of my abuelito! Nighty night! A kiss on the cheek is probably the most I can get away with!
Pepe: Egad!
Pepe: So where’s your car?
Frida: I almost never get it out of the garage.
Pepe: Have you thought of selling it so you could live someplace better?
Frida: Never! It’s the only memento I have of my abuelito! Nighty night! A kiss on the cheek is probably the most I can get away with!
Pepe: Egad!
*Casa Iramal, breakfast*
Meli: You two act like children.
Vins: Maybe you’ll understand when you’re in love.
Pina: Speaking of which, I hope you’re staying away from that Lopez brat.
Meli: No way. I’m not like my lily-livered cousin Freddy. I’m not going to ditch my novio just because you said to.
Freddy: Gulp.
Vice: Your mother and I are now totally cool with your relationship with Ana.
Meli: You two act like children.
Vins: Maybe you’ll understand when you’re in love.
Pina: Speaking of which, I hope you’re staying away from that Lopez brat.
Meli: No way. I’m not like my lily-livered cousin Freddy. I’m not going to ditch my novio just because you said to.
Freddy: Gulp.
Vice: Your mother and I are now totally cool with your relationship with Ana.
*Casa Lopez*
Record exec Frank: Ana! I love your record and I want to represent you!
Record exec Frank: Ana! I love your record and I want to represent you!
*Mobster Mansion*
Napo: I’ll be home by noon for a repeat of last night!
Candy: Great! (let’s hope you’re in jail by then.)
Napo: I’ll be home by noon for a repeat of last night!
Candy: Great! (let’s hope you’re in jail by then.)
*Avon*
Enzo: How much time do I waste sitting around rolling my eyes while people blather on? Oh, Pancho, how nice of you to make time for me. Here are the best houses I’ve found.
Candy: Hola!
Enzo: Nothing to see here! I’m outtie!
Candy: Here’s some data I stole! I’ll be free!
Enzo: How much time do I waste sitting around rolling my eyes while people blather on? Oh, Pancho, how nice of you to make time for me. Here are the best houses I’ve found.
Candy: Hola!
Enzo: Nothing to see here! I’m outtie!
Candy: Here’s some data I stole! I’ll be free!
Mañana: looks like Deb and the henchmen kidnap Rebe.
Labels: familia
© Caray, Caray! 2006-2022. Duplication of this material for use on any other site is strictly prohibited.
