Friday, November 27, 2009

ENDA November 27, 2009

Hi all--I've posted this for comments/discussion on the Friday episode.

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Thursday, November 26, 2009

Sortilegio, November 26, 2009 It's a Turkey of a Day When There is no Sortilegio.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I hope you all had a happy and safe holiday. You know it is that magical time of the year when the Plaza lights are turned on, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KjNVyQ3oGI, the snow will soon be gently falling, the streets are filled with shoppers, the horses and carriages are out, and it takes me an hour to get home from work because I'm stuck behind a horse and carriage who is stuck behind all the looky-loos gawking at the lights. (Big sigh.) Why they can't wait until after rush hour is beyond me.

As Viewerville slowly awakens from its turkey coma, which is similar to the Nyquil green coma, but tastes much better, and we are suffering from the seasonal disorder I like to call “donelops disease” (your gut has done lopped over your belt) we are once again ready for a dun, dun, dun--General Discussion. So here are some thoughts to get things rolling:

1. If you could invite any character from a TN to Thanksgiving dinner who would it be and what special dish would you prepare? (Cough, ahem, just so we are clear, “special dish” does not constitute you, with a bow on any part of your anatomy!) Feel free to post recipes.*

2. Which TN animal was/is your favorite? (i.e. Capricho, Mariachi, etc.)

3. Of all the industries that we've been exposed to (milk, tequila, etc.) which did you find to be the most interesting?

Have fun!

*IDEA: What do you all say to creating an annual Caray! Caray! Recipe Book? We could all submit recipes and then they could be compiled into a book or document or whatever format works best. I'm not sure exactly how we would set it up but somehow make it centrally located so we could access it and print it out.

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Un Gancho #111 Wed 11/25 - Coni's full of stuffing, there's a bun in the oven and boy, does she ever feel like a turkey!

Ahoy all, I am subbing for Kris tonight and I don't think there is an episode tomorrow night. I'm thankful for that. I also have a great group of telenovela buddies who are bright, erudite, and darn funny. I'm thankful for that. I just had a fun Thanksgiving pot luck with a group of friends and in less than 24 hours I get to have a full-on dinner at my house and celebrate my mother un-law's 80th birthday. I'm thankful for that. Finally, I think that tonight might be Salvador's last night of insane facial tics. I think we are ALL thankful for that! Let's get started...


OK, we remember that Beto is at work, hopped up on Lor's Loco Liquid and has locked himself into a room "with the woman" he loves. "It's Monita!" suggests Nieves. "No no no, it's Constanza," corrects the faithful Gabi. "It's both of them," offers the helpful Jacqui. Mau is once, twice, three times impacted. Sal is still ticking sporadically and advising Mau on Beto's nervous state. Lordy let this madness end soon, Sal is making us as crazy as he is!

The camera in the sequester room shows us that Beto has indeed entrapped his two ladies, Moni and Coni, and they both demand to be set free. He demands hugs and kisses and love...and slurping por favor.

Mau yells through the door and, notably, asks Moni first, is everything OK? Coni answers No she's not OK, she needs air, and Monita is very violent, wah!

Jero takes Jacqui aside and offers to show her his office. Sal approaches and winks, or should I say ticks, at her.

How to deal with this crisis? Pau is afraid that Monita will kill Mau's wife. Lorenza is worried she'll get busted for spiking Beto's coffee. Oski tells her to play it cool, he'll try to head them off at the pass.

In the privacy of his office Jero offers Jacqui a drink and tells her that her eyes fascinate him and since he met her last night her eyes haunt him (me embrujan). He tells her he's the owner of Grupo Sermeño and, when asked, admits that oh yeah, Mauricio is too, but he (Jero) has MUCH more money than Mauricio. She's amazed that a man like him is still single. It's only because he hasn't met the ideal woman, but now she's in front of his face. It doesn't take these two long to get into an enthusiastic clinch.

Meanwhile Rolu and Xime, she looking fantastically slim and beautiful in black leggings, boots and black and white houndstooth jacket cinched at the waist with a wide belt, are hiding out in the bathroom, although Rolu is not exactly sure why. Locarenza uses the phone right next to the bathroom and calls Oski, have the cops shown up yet? Xime eavesdrops as Lo tells Oski she's afraid someone will discover she has been poisonoing Sal for over six months and accidentally poisoned Beto. Don't you love how these characters feel the need to explain the entire story to someone who already knows it? Oski tells her he'll never abandon her so hang tough. Xime overhears all of this and is muy pero muy impactada. She crosses her wrists, wonder woman style.

Jacqui is getting a better workout than a day at the gym. She's got her hands full with Jero who is trying to hump her like a bucking bronco. "Wait wait wait wait" she insists, "this isn't how you make love." "Love? I've only had sex," he tells her, "I'm a love virgin." This won't do for our worldly Jacqui, she wants to teach him how to make luuuuv to a woman. "Teach me teach me teach me!" he shrieks, humping madly and slapping himself on the butt. Jacqui honey, I don't know if young flesh is going to be worth it with this guy. He's frenetic, frantic, and lacks finesse. But wait, Jero tells Jacqui a little secret, Coni tried to get him to help get rid of Jacqui. Hmmmm...our double agent agrees to give Jacqui the ammunition she needs to stay in the DF.

Speaking of frantic, this is Beto's current state and he is afraid and spinning in circles. He must have a hug and a kiss!! Coni faints, is she faking? Moni gives her a gentle kick but no response. Well well well, as Judy predicted Coni's nausea has been followed by a faint and I think we all know what this means.

Xime and Rolu walk and wheel into Mau's office to tell him and Sal their big news. It takes them forever because Rolu keeps getting in Xime's way of saying three things. Finally Gabi wheels him outside and shuts the door. Xime doesn't exactly get to the point, but she finally has three things to say (well four actually, counting the part that Gabi rocks): One, Robi (Beto) is all crazy because he accidentally took some medication. Two, Lor has been giving the medication to Sal for six months and it's making him crazy. Three, she's doing it so that Sal will end up in the nuthouse.

Mientras tanto, Nieves is having a meltdown and madly milking her moo-cow clutch. Pau comforts her by telling her Chris will be there to save the day. Chris stalks up, raps on the door, "Robert Beto Ochoa, open the door and come out with your hands up!"

Mau storms out of his office and pushes the hapless Rolu who happens to be, unhappily, in Mau's way. Rolu hits the wall and ends up in a heap on the floor, holding his head.

Mau, Sal, and Gabi, in a hailstorm of accusations, out Lorenza to Christian. Xime confirms that she and Rolu overheard her dastardly plot to drive Sal insane by poisoning his coffee and Beto accidentally drank some which is why he's behaving like a madman. Snow turns to Fire as Nieves lunges at Lorenza and tries to yank her curly locks out of her head. Chris intervenes and commands his men to arrest Lorenza. Poor Sal is fit to be tied and tongue-tied but manages to babble it's a shame because she makes such delicious coffee. Gabi retrieves the poison and offers it as evidence.

As the cops take Locarenza away she hisses to Gabi that next time she'll get Gabi too. Gabi calmly retorts that next time Loca sees her she will be Sal's wife. Gabi, I like your style.

Xime delightedly tellls Rolu this is the first crime they have solved together. Rolu? Rolu?

Meanwhile Monita is fanning Coni and still trying to get our brain-addled Beto out of the way so she can open the door. All he can think of is giving Coni mouth-to-mouth.

If, at this point, it seems like everything is happening it once, it is. While Mau, Xime and Sal pick a pained Rolu off of the floor Nieves runs up shrieking to Mauricio that Monita is going to kill her son. Run Mau Run!

Mau tries to talk Beto down and reassures him that nobody wants to attack him. Beto disagrees, Moni wants to attack him because he won't open the door. Gabi calmly suggests that if he opens the door then Moni won't attack him. Makes sense; he opens the door and runs toward Mau with open arms. Mau slaps him aside and runs to Moni. Beto hugs mami. Mau sees Coni conked out and looks at Moni accusingly. Nope, she fainted. He kneels and tenderly pats Coni's face as Monita watches.

Later Coni is awake and Beto tries to shake off his high. Jacqui announces she has a date and as long as Coni is OK she's off. However Coni looks anemic and ma wants to take her to see the doctor. Uh huh!

Coni must be feeling better because she verbally attacks Moni again. Gabi comes in and explains about what happened to Beto. Mau shouldn't blame Beto for what he did under the influence. In fact, given half a chance Beto would probably make a play for her too, right? Beto confirms her theory by kissing Gabi on the lips. Twice. He puts his head on her shoulder and she looks like she's trying hard to stifle a laugh.

Moni tells Mau to go to his wife and be her vanilla, she's leaving with the chocolate. She grabs Beto's hand and pulls him out.

The full moon rises and it is several days later...

Don Cesar is training Monita; the boys (Beto and Costeño) ask him about the new fighter. Is he good? Oh much better than you Beto, DC responds.

Coni and Jacqui are in the doctor's office discussing what in world could be wrong with Coni. Coni thinks it's just a virus or something. Ma notes that the "something", whatever it is, has a name. The doc comes in with Coni's results. What does Coni have, is she going to die? Big surprise, the doc congratulates Coni, "you're going to be a mother Mrs. Sermeño." Coni is appropriately impactada, however we are not.

Back at the gym Moni is jumping rope while the boys roughhouse. The new luchador strides into the gym and all eyes turn to him. His eyes are on Monita and she sexily cocks an eyebrow at him. She's interested.

Coni is impactada and not entirely happy. Is the doc sure? Absolutely. How could such a thing happen? Jacqui vounteers to explain. Above all she's excited that Mau and Coni will have their own child!

Don Cesar introduces Monita to his new best Luchador, Furia Enmascarada. She explains that DC also trains her as a boxer, she lost her last fight but she's going to have a rematch! Beto butts in, what about El Fantasma Vengador? DC scolds him, he lacks discipline. Beto is wearing the funniest shirt, it says "ay que saver ezcrivir" which is a misspelling of "hay que saber escribir" which means "must be able to write". Anyway, Beto challenges Furia to a fight, DC doesn't like the idea, but Furia whispers something in DC's ear and DC says Furia accepts the challenge.

Coni asks the doc again is he sure, could there be some mistake? Nope, no mistake. She's distraught and Jacqui tells her it's great news, what's the problem? When she was preggers she gained very little weight and Coni will be the same, right doc? Doc is unsure and Coni tells Ma to shut up.

El Fantasma Vengador has donned his costume and mask, but while he mouths off to Moni Furia attacks from behind. Both fighters get in some great moves and holds. Fantasma throws Furia over his shoulder and spins him around, Furia gets Fantasma in a foot hold. They flit, they fling, they fly, they flop.

Over at the Mau house Tere happily anounces that Coni and Jacqui are out so their dinner will be blissfully peaceful and quiet. The doorbell rings and Katia answers. It's Estrella and she wants to see Aldo. Katia tells Estrella to beat it, Estrella is not welcome to hang out with decent people like herself. (Oh Katia, you are such a hypocrite!) No go!

Back at the gym the fighters are still going at it with Furia doing a mighty back flip and finally getting the upper hand. He strikes the victor's pose while the gym applauds. But Fantasma's pride is hurt and Moni's not doing much to soothe his ego. He's mad because he thought he and Moni were a team and here she is congratulating this "cabeza de pepita", i.e. pumpkin seed head. She corrects him, they are not a team, they just work out in the same gym. DC tells Fantasma to accept it, he got his butt kicked fair and square. Fantasma must sense the attraction between Moni and Furia because he pulls her away and tells her to stay away from this cuate. "What about you and Coni?" she demands. She says she doesn't trust him.

DC tells Beto that Furia wants a rematch. Beto warns Furia to stay away from Moni and wrenches his shoulder when he tries to strike a threatening pose, effectively negating the impact of his threat. Moni and Furia continue staring at each other.

Jacqui and Coni are at the cafe, Coni wants an espresso but Jacqui changes the order, her pregnant daughter will have a lemonade. Coni is miffed that Jacqui blabbed to the whole world that she's pregnant. Jacqui knows why Coni is in a snit, it's because she doesn't really know who the kid belongs to, right? She doesn't know if it belongs to her husband or her lover, that's why Coni is worried. Then she scolds Coni for having unprotected sex with that naco. Coni clarifies things a little for Jacqui. Actually she knows it's Roberto's because she and Mauricio haven't had sex in a long time. Ay Dios mio, Jacqui puts her head in her hands. Coni insists she can't have this baby.

Mau continues to practice at the gym as Moni casually watches. After the others leave Furia approaches Moni and she happily chats at him, can he help her untie her gloves and she'll help him take off his mask? "You know, your eyes remind me of someone", she says wistfully.

Feliz Día de Pavo!!!!

Tomorrow: Estrella finds herself underneath Furia. Sal tells Gabi he wants to be alone. Coni wants to abort ASAP.

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Sortilegio - Wed Nov 25 - EP 36 - Sangre Is Expensive!

Capitulo 41

Victoria is talking to Fernando on the the phone when Katia comes down and listens. She hears Fernando say he is worried about her. Katia asks if he was talking to Victoria.

Maura comes to Useless to tell him about Katia and Bruno and Katia being a minor. They toast.

Roberto tells Rachel how MJ needs blood and it is only Bruno that can give it.

Victoria asks Felipe if she thinks the child is Ales. "Of course" Victoria goes of on one of her rants. Rachel interrupts and Rachel and Victoria argue. Rachel doesn't think Bruno should do anything for those low life people. Victoria is on Rachel about how she doesn't care about what Ale and MJ are going through, that how can she not care that MJ and the baby could die? Victoria doesn't want to fight.
Victoria has been talking to Felipe about Bruno being a monster, and Victoria tells Rachel she is a monster too!. Rachel replies "What did you excpect? Mama, we are the product of adultery." she leaves.

Victoria cries. "What do I do? Felipe, What do I do?" Felipe replies that Rachel is medio
chiflado. Half Crazy.

Rachel calls Bruno and tells him not to do it. Bruno in a taxi with Hernan, and he answers that he is going to do it.

Moon rising. Is this the first moonrise in this show?

Ale is at MJ's bedside crying, talking, saying that help is coming. He is with her and reminds her of their trip to Cenote where they made love in the caves. He would like to build a house for them on the ocean where their children can run on the beach. He is crying and saying "no me dejes" " Don't leave me please!" MJ heavily opens her eyes and closes them again.

Arturo is outside Useless's window where he must be waiting for Rachel. He checks the name on the mailbox and as he thinks about it he has a laugh to himself. Chuckle, Chuckle.

Inside Rachel is with Useless ranting about the blood again. Useless shuts her up with his mouth. Enough said!

Hernan and Bruno arrive at the hospital. Hernan goes off to talk to the Doctor.

Pedro thanks Bruno for coming to help. Bruno walks away.

Pedro tells Paula to tell get Ale. Ale asks Paula to stay stay with MJ. Pedro points out Bruno to Ale.
Ale thanks Bruno for coming. Bruno asks how she is and and Ale says bad. Bruno asks how does Ale know the baby isn't Brunos. Ale says all the more reason for Bruno to help. Bruno says he is not doing this for free. Ale asks Bruno what he wants. Bruno tells Ale he wants him to divorce MJ and give him the presidency. Ale says he can have the presidency but they, Ale and MJ don't want a divorce. Bruno says that that doesn't matter, those are his conditions. Ale tries to talk some humanity into Bruno, but the doctor comes for Bruno, and Ale accepts the conditions. Bruno swaggers after the doctor after reminding Ale not to talk about this to Victoria. Chucho asks Ale whats wrong but Ale says nothing. Chucho goes off a bit, but I didn't catch it.

Ale is talking on the phone with Victoria and she asks Ale if there were any problems with Bruno and Ale says no. They say good night.

Felipe says something about Bruno and Victoria goes off that Bruno is doing something good and people only want to see him as a monster.

Felipe gets Cucu and leaves.

Felipe is outside when Arturo brings Rachel home. Felipe asks Arturo where they were and Arturo doesn't want to answer because he is discrete for his patron. Arturo has a squeaky toy for Cucu.

The doctors have gotten the sangre from Bruno and are on there way to MJ and Ale tries to follow, but Hernan has him sit in the waiting room.

Ez and Felipe are eating something in the kitchen. Felipe is telling EZ how Arturo would not tell her where they had been. Cucu is liking shoestrings.

At the hospital Chucho is asking if Pedro wants a beer or if he and Paula want something to eat? They say no.

Back at Casa Lombardo, Fernando is pulling in the drive. He walks right up the door and lets himself in. I thought the gate guy always called EZ. Speaking of...

EZ has Arturo in the kitchen for interrogation where he squeezes out that Rachel visited Useless. The phone is ringing.. oh I guess Tomas is calling. EZ leaves and we see that Felipe has been listening to the conversation. Felipe goes into the kitchen to rib Arturo. Arturo is worried now, cause he needs the work, his mother is sick and needs medicines. Felipe tells him she is just joking with him.

The coctors are giving MJ the transfusion. Hernan is checking her pulse and eyes. The doctors look at the chart.

Back at Lombardo house Fernando and Victoria kiss. She is nervous. They talk about Ale, Bruno, Mario Aguirre, and, Victoria asks about Katia.

The doctors come out and tell Ale that they are done with the transfusion. They will see tomorrow how MJ responds. Ale says this night has been biggest of his life. Ale asks the doctor if he could go see MJ and the doctor says that it would be ok. Hernan and Ale talk but the noise is to loud I can't make out the words. Ale thanks Hernan. Hernan calls Victoria and tells her they have completed the transfusion. Hernan tells her everything is okay but he says somethings is going on that he doesn't like. Viewerville does not hear what Hernan tells Victoria but, watches as Victoria sucks in her stomach. Victoria thanks Hernan for his help and hangs up.

Music plays loudly, drowning out Fernando and Victoria's conversation.

Ale is at MJ's bedside. In come Paula, Pedro and Chucho. Paula tells Ale that MJ is stable and he could leave. Ale says no. Pedro whispers good night to MJ and gives her a blessing. They all say good night and leave. Ale sits back down and violins play. Ale sees MJ open her eyes and says "hey beautiful!" Ale tells MJ she is recuperating and the baby is okay too. MJ is grateful and wants to know who it was that gave her blood. MJ drifts back into sleep and Ale says nothing is going to separate them.

Next day, Fernando brings Katia to la officina to work. He introduces her to Mari, who says shes got papers to file and Katia is looking at her like "right". Fernando wishes Katia luck and leaves. Mari is trying to give Mari some work but Katia isn't even listening. Katia wants to know where Bruno's office is? Mari tells Katia that Bruno doesn't have an office here. Katia finally leaves and Mari looks like she gets this girl.

Lisette and Maura are talking about Bruno.

Ale is talking to Fernando on the phone. They are taking about the on ongoing investigation of all the events of the crash and the photo etc. Ale tells Fernando that the conditions for Bruno donating blood was for Ale to give up the presidencia and divorce MJ. Fernando asks if he is CRAZY. Ale says don't tell my Madre.

Victoria is having breakfast when Bruno gets home. She is giddy to tell him what a good deed he did.

Ale gets back to the hospital where Pedro tells him that MJ is much better.

Ale enters MJ's room and says "Good morning my love, how are you doing?" MJ says fine, she is much better. Ale says he is taking her back to Merida. MJ doesn't want to. Ale tells her it will only be till he can find another house for her. MJ wants to know who gave her blood, who gave her life? Ale is sick. "What's wrong?" MJ asks. MJ goes on to praise the donor, without which she says, she and his child would be dead.

"Ale, tell me was it my Sister my Father?" Ale tells her it was Bruno, and they both are sick and they share that sickness with a long gaze. Someone comes to take a statement from MJ about the assault.

Paula remembers that today is the day to show up in Merida for her probation. She jumps up and tells Papa. Papa says they can tell them they had an emergency and tries to calm her.

Roberto is looking out the window down to where he sees Useless and Rachel laughing. Rachel sees Roberto and asks him what he is doing here. Rachel says she is very hungry and she's going to see if they lived or died.
Roberto complains about her to Uselesss. Roberto says that if MJ died he has nothing to worry about. Useless tells Roberto about Bruno being with Katia, a minor. Roberto can't believe how stupid that was of Bruno.

Bruno is saying that Ale didn't even thank him for saving his woman. Victoria asks Bruno what he asked of Ale. Bruno gets all defensive, and asks if she has talked with Ale. Victoria says she is just asking him a question. Bruno doesn't like her questions and is mad that there is a dog at the table. (Felipe is holding Cucu.) Rachel comes in and says that their mother prefers mangy dogs over them. Felipe gets up and takes her companion with her. Victoria is upset that they treat her friend that way, and she leaves. Bruno tells Rachel that they will have something good come their way, just watch.

Ale is assuring Paula that she has nothing to worry about, after they tell the circumstanses. So she won't be locked up? Ale tells her no.

Ale asks Hernan about moving MJ? Hernan thinks he should wait till tomorrow. Hernan asks about all of them and Ale tells him they are the family of is wife and they all come until he finds another house.

Felipe is teaching Cucu tricks. She is also waiting for Rachel. When Rachel walks by Felipe asks to have a word with her. Felipe wants Rachel to be nice to Victoria and quit bring up Antonio etc. Other wise she will have to mention what is going on with Useless. Rachel says that Useless is only her friend and Cucu growls.

My dvr ends.

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Wednesday, November 25, 2009

ENDA, November 25, 2009

Paloma is thinking about jumping off the tower of the church. A handsome stranger spots her and runs to her rescue. She yells at him. What are you doing? He says saving you. You were going to jump! I was not replies Paloma and run off. He chases after her.

Inez just finishes confessing to Emiliano the plot that Diana planned against Orlando. Emiliano can't believe that his mother would do that. He knew that she was controlling and manipulative, but never imagined that she was cold and calculating. Inez tries to defend Diana to Emiliano, but he is not hearing any of it. He apologizes to Orlando for everything that happened. Orlando says don't worry. I'm just glad to be in your life now. They hug.

Paloma runs out of church with the handsome stranger following. He asks why she is so sad? I'm fine replies Paloma and tries to walk away. He pulls her back and asks her name. I don't talk to strangers replies Paloma. He introduces himself then as Gabriel Elizande(?) But Paloma walks away.

Inez asks that they do not tell Diana that she told them anything. But Diana is outside and hears Orlando asking Emiliano what he is going to do. Emiliano says that he doesn't want to talk to his mother. He can't believe she did what she did and put all the blame on Orlando. Orlando says your mother loves you, you need to talk to her. Emiliano wants to go and think about everything that's happened. Diana cries.

Liliana spots German at a restaurant and asks him if he has bought any clothes for his baby? German says the baby is Emiliano's. Liliana wants German to help her unmask Romina. He can't. Because if he does he can lose Romina forever. Ever since he has met her, he can't get her out of his mind. I have tried, but it has become an obsession. He thinks perhaps if he met someone else he could get Romina out of his mind. He asks Liliana to help him forget. But you cheated on me replies Liliana. German asks for another chance.

Diana rings Inez doorbell and when she answers Diana barges in and slaps Inez and calls her a traitor. She saw Emiliano and Orlando walking out of her apartment and figures that Inez spilled the beans. Diana tells her that if her son hates her it will be all her fault. Inez reminds her that she tried to talk her out of it and she didn't listen. Diana says you don't know what a mother would do to protect her son. Though you wouldn't know, you were never one. You are right replies Inez. I don't know what it's like to be a mother, but I do know what it's like to be a kind and honest person. (HA-HA. That's something Diana definitely has no clue about) You have no idea how much I regret being your accomplice in everything. I'm done. I no longer want to know anything about you again. Our friendship is over.

Carloca is staring at the roses she received and figures there from Samuel. She wonders what intentions he has. It's obvious that he was attracted to her from the first time they met. Perhaps if Cristobal sees someone is interested in her, it will spark his interest in her. (Not a chance in hell, lady)

Gabriel is at the church restoring a portrait and Cristobal comes in and introduces himself. Cristobal asks him how he is liking Real del Monte. Gabriel replies that it has started very intense. I have met a most beautiful woman. She hates me though. They sit down and start talking about his encounter.

Paloma tells Rufi about her encounter at the church with the stranger. He thought that she was going to kill herself. Rufi asks her if she was. Of course not replies Paloma. I may have thought about taking pills, but decided against it. Pretty soon I will be 18 and can leave Real del Monte, but promises to take Rufi with her. They talk about Rodolfo and Rufi wonders if he is still her best option in helping her leave. Yes replies Paloma. As they are talking, Carloca comes in quietly. Paloma says to bad she can't leave before the wedding though. Rufi asks if she knows when they are going to get married. No replies Paloma. That is why I am glad that I kissed Emiliano today for the last time. Carloca finally pipes up and says that she shouldn't have done it. How would you like to know that the man you were going to marry was kissing someone else? Paloma says it's not going to happen again. Carloca tells her to put distance between her and Emiliano. Moving away is not the answer. Then how do I do that? No one has told me how to take him out of my heart replies Paloma. But you also had to live your life without the man that you loved because he wasn't yours. Yes replies Carloca. But I never chased after him. (No, you just stalk and threw yourself at him in a hussie fashion) Quit playing with fire Carloca warns.

Gabiel and Cristobal are talking as Emiliano comes up to them. Emiliano says that Inez told him the truth. Cristobal introduces Gabriel to Emiliano and leaves to talk to Emiliano. Gabriel wonders who the mystery woman is.

Emiliano tells Cristobal that he has no idea how he feels about his mother anymore. Cristobal says that great pain can make you numb. But you have to confront those feelings and let it all out. I just can't believe that she lied to us all replies Emiliano. Who is my mother? He cries and Cristobal holds him.

Rufi answers the phone and it's for Carloca. It's a call from her admirer, but she refuses the call. He leaves a message saying that she is more beautiful then the roses he sent. Rufi relays the message and Carloca says if he calls again, I am not here. Carloca thinks to herself that he is more interested then she thought.

Camila and Monica are going over paperwork. Monica wonders when the wedding will take place. Saturday replies Camila. So soon asks Monica. She tells Camila that she should take a chance with Orlando and take him as her date to the wedding. Diana disguises her voice and calls Camila. She calls her a whore and hangs up. Camila wonders who it is. Monica says it must be Diana.

Romina tells Emiliano that she brought her wedding dress. And since they are not going to get married at the church then the wedding with be this Saturday at 2. Emiliano thinks it's to soon. Romina says there's no reason to wait. Where are we going to live asks Emiliano. If I can't find anything by Saturday we'll just stay with my mother replies Romina. Emiliano refuses to put out her mother and suggests they can rent an apartment. Romina thinks it's because he wants to be alone with her. He bursts her bubble and says he doesn't want to bother anyone. He hangs up with her and thinks about Paloma and there goodbye kiss. Paloma is thinking the same.

Diana comes back to visit Inez. Inez reminds her that there friendship is over. What does she want? Diana says she can't believe that she wants to end it. Even though you are a traitor, I want us to still be friends. What for replies Inez. Because it convinces us both responds Diana. And don't forget I know a lot of things about you. So say them to whomever replies Inez. I don't care anymore. I no longer want to be your friend. Diana gets on her knees and begs Inez to reconsider. She has no other friend then her.

Rufi gives Paloma Rodolfo's number. She calls him and tells him she has made a decision about going with him to Mexico City. Of course, Carloca overhears this. Anyway Rodolfo is happy to hear this. He asks to speak to Rufi and reminds her that the reunion is tonight. Carloca comes in and confronts the woman. She knows that Paloma wants to leave here, but has she never thought about what it would do to her. She starts crying. She can't imagine living without her and walks out. She goes to her library and says that Paloma is a dreamer. She will do whatever to keep Paloma at her side.

Emiliano tells Rafael that Romina has set the wedding date for this Saturday. Rafael feels sorry for how Emiliano's life has changed. He can't believe what Emiliano has just told him about Diana. He thinks that Diana has lost her mind. Now he doesn't know what to believe about everything that Diana has ever told him. Me too replies Emiliano. She needs help.

Orlando and Angelica talk about Diana over breakfast. Orlando asks her to help him with Emiliano.

Carloca warns Rufi from putting ideas into Paloma's head about leaving.

Cristobal tells Alonzo that he is glad that he is trying to repair his marriage. Alonzo says he can't believe that he is sitting across from the man that almost married his wife. It was a long time ago replies Cristobal. Blah-Blah-Blah. Alonzo asks about Carloca. Natalia comes in and calls Carloca a witch. She tried to make me doubt Cristobal, but thankfully we tell each other everything. Alonzo asks Cristobal why he hates Carloca. Well, it's a long story replies Cristobal. But it's clear that she will do whatever she can to get what she wants. The doorbell rings and Natalia leaves to answer it. Do you think even to kill asks Alonzo. Well replies Cristobal. She made someone think I was dead and made me believe she was dead. But do you think that she can do it asks Alonzo again. I would like to say no replies Cristobal. But I am not willing to put my hands in fire for her.

Camila thinks about what Monica told her last night about Diana possibly being the caller. Romina comes down and says she's going to call Diana over to talk about the wedding. Camila tells her not to. Why asks Romina. Because we should do the preparations ourselves replies Camila. Well she will be my mother-in-law and I think it's appropriate for her to help. I'm going to ask her to come tonight. That's fine replies Camila. Romina asks Camila if Orlando will be her date for the wedding. She doesn't know yet answers Camila. He'll be there anyway since he's Emiliano's father. No, replies Romina. Rafael is Emiliano's father even though Orlando gave him life. I think it will be very uncomfortable. Both fathers of the groom are her boyfriends. Camila thinks that her comment was inappropriate. Romina disagrees and says that her father will be at the wedding and she will have 3 men who love her. Camila finally realizes that all 3 men will be at the wedding along with Diana. This is going to be hell.

Inez has decided to be friends with Diana again. As long as Diana doesn't make her help in any crazy schemes. Diana is glad and asks Inez why things always go bad for her? Emiliano and Rafael are not answering her calls. And now she knows who is stealing Rafael away from her. She saw them kissing. Inez asks who, but Diana doesn't want to say yet. But she will make sure the whole town finds out and despises her.

At the meeting of the Carloca haters they are discussing the will. Alonzo asks why has Paloma not know what was in the will all this time. Because Carloca is her guardian replies Rufi. Rodolfo says he tried to get information from German but didn't want to seem to eager for the information. Blah, Blah, Blah.

Carloca gets a call from the bishop's assistant. The bishop wants to set up a meeting next week to talk.

Friday: Paloma tells Cristobal that Macarena was her real mother.

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ENDA Tuesday November 24. “I’ll NEVER love again!...Why, hello there, hottie.”

In the street, Carlota snottily snots to Alonso that she has way better manners than he has. Practically in the same breath she says she doesn’t understand why his wife forgave him for tomcatting around. Who said this wasn’t a comedy?! He apologizes for having accused her of murder and says obviously she is just looking out for her beloved niece. She accepts his apology in the most stuck-up way possible and leaves. Alonso thinks to himself that he will be watching her every move.

Carloca is doing some shopping and is accosted by Diana, who feels the need to do some good works with the church ladies because she wants to associate with good women, since it seems her former friends just want to steal her husband. Carloca is shocked and outraged that there are shameless hussies who will destroy relationships and thinks those women should be publicly denounced. I guess she didn’t read that bible story all the way to the end. Carloca agrees to help Diana, even though she really hates to meddle in other people’s lives (!), because she really must uphold the values of Immoral del Monte.

Samuel swings by Camila’s shop to accuse her of having been a terrible mother, as Romina’s pregnancy proves. He says she did as bad a job as her own mother did with her. Is he insinuating that they married because they were expecting Romina? Camila yells that he has no right to judge her parenting not having bothered to even do a poor job himself, and throws him out. He steals some tchotchke on his way. Monica assured Cami that she was the best mother possible.

Romina finds Carlota and tells her their plan has worked and Emiliano has agreed to marry her. However, she does not want to be a mother, and it’s too late to abort. Romi wants Cruel to help her get rid of the brat forever as soon as the wedding is over. Cruelota says it’s hard for her to help since this is against her principles. I’m guessing those principles would be the ones against helping people, not the Catholic principles against abortion or killing or anything. But she does have some ideas; for example she knew of a girl who had a miscarriage from “accidentally” falling down the stairs.

Dour Inés dooms and glooms her way into the Platería Ferrer and blames Angélica for Aaron’s exile and asks to see Orlando. She is escorted into his office along with a lot of tragic music. Orly glares at her.

Romina doesn’t like the idea of falling down the stairs; it’s too dangerous. Carlota is the voice of reason for once and suggests she just put the baby up for adoption. But no, she must trap Emiliano into marrying her. “Fine, be stuck with a baby your whole life. Be sure to invite us to the wedding. We’re dying to be there, especially Paloma.”

Paloma knocks on Emiliano’s apartment door. He answers. They both stand there looking all emotional foreeeeeeever. Finally they let their lips take over.

Inés agrees to confess everything to Orlando as long as he promises to never let Diana find out she told. He says fine, but Emiliano must know the truth.

Emiliano and Paloma agree that they don’t want to split up. However, they are both martyrs, so they must, and thus this is the last time they can smooch. Wait, isn’t the wedding not for a few weeks? More tears, more liplocking.

Orlando and Inés agree to terms, and Orlando asks Ange to send Emiliano in. However, Emo has not returned from his long lunch break. Ange dials the phone and leaves Emo an urgent summons message.

Paloma tells Emo she’s going to go to school in México City. He doesn’t want her to go. She says she can’t stand to be around if he’s married to Romina. More sobbing, more kissing. Paloma gets all melodramatic (even more than usual) and wants One Last Kiss, then says adios about a thousand times and finally leaves. She only makes it to the other side of the door before she must lean on the wall to wail pitifully. Inside, Emo collapses on the floor to do the same. These two are delightful. We are treated to a montage of happier times. Then back to the present. Looks like Emo has found an onion and dredged up some real tears.

Romina continues her tour of terror and drops into Camila’s shop. Camila still thinks the wedding is a bad bad bad idea and begs Romina not to make the same mistake Cami made. Also she tells Romi not to idolize her wretched father. Romememena pays the usual amount of attention to her mother’s wisdom.

A huge basket of flowers is delivered to Carlota. She thinks they are from Cris; I’m guessing Sam. The note is romantic but unsigned. Carloca looks a little hot and bothered.

Diana rant scene. Honestly, I have a little trouble following her lunatic diatribes, but I think she wants to stone Camila and keep the apron strings strangling Emiliano, to loosely paraphrase.

Paloma has gone to the office to cry on Ange’s shoulder. The perfect place to avoid Emiliano, obvi, since the owner’s son/partner needn’t bother showing up. Ange tells Paloma that, believe it or not, she isn’t the only one who has suffered, and Ange knows just what she’s going through. She’ll get over it with time. Paloma of course thinks everything is worse for her and she is never going to get attached to anyone again. Ange tells her if she doesn’t take risks she may not suffer as much but she won’t enjoy life, either.

Emiliano mopes on the sofa and listens to Angélica’s message. He calls Orlando and agrees to go meet with him and Inés. As he’s leaving, Romina appears at the door. She wants to talk wedding details. He is not interested but tells her they aren’t having a church wedding, only civil.

Cris carries Rufi’s bags for her and tells her Alonso is in a good mood and helping Team Good Guys. He says Cruel doesn’t want him anywhere near Paloma. Rufi begs him not to abandon her.

Romememena says they are having a showstopper of a wedding, civil, church, big reception, honeymoon in Europe, the works. Emo says just the civil wedding, which he is only doing for the baby, not because he wants to be married to her. A big church wedding would be a farce since she never even goes to mass and is pregnant. She isn’t going to manipulate and control him any further. Romina bats her eyelashes and makes a pouty face I’m sure she thinks is endearing but he holds his ground.

Germán calls someone about Carlota’s papers, then calls Carlota to say that the papers are on their way and he will deliver them personally as soon as they arrive. She reminds him to be utterly discreet. Oh, he’s definitely going to read them now. Carlota thinks to herself that this will keep Paloma from finding out about her money at least until she is 21, and by then Cruel will have thought of a new plan.

Diana sees Emiliano get out of his car and go into Inés’s house. She hopes it isn’t about what she thinks. Inside, Inés tells Emo that she beat up Diana, not Orlando, at Diana’s request. Emo is stunned.

Romina tries on wedding dresses and whines that she looks fat, as Camila comments that she’s bound to lose her waistline seeing as how she is pregnant and tries to talk her into a more accommodating empire-waist gown. Romi, however, wants to look as skinny as possible and says the wedding is this weekend. Then she unleashes escalating brattiness until Cami loses it and tells her to be more respectful or else.

Paloma goes to the church to continue her tearfest. She walks up to the choir loft and through a hatch and out into the bell tower. She starts climbing over the balcony rail. Sheesh, what melodrama. A man down in the street sees her and runs to save the day. He pulls her off the railing and naturally they tumble to the floor and Paloma lands on top of him. He turns out to be a rather handsome young dude, of course, and they stare at each other. Looks like that twisted little pest Cupid is running amok again.

Avances: Romina prepares for the wedding by dressing up like a princess. Emiliano prepares by bawling in Cristóbal’s lap.

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Sortilegio #35, Tuesday, November 24: Your recapper regrets to inform you...

...my DVR did not record Sortilegio tonight while I was out at rehearsal. I am so incredibly sorry that I have no recap for you. I throw myself on the mercy of the viewers to take pity on me and please fill me in on what happened tonight!

Courtesy of La Paloma, we have the following so far:
"Alex rushed to MJ's side in his trusty helicopter, only to learn that she may die because of no available blood to match her rare blood type. He called the silver-haired family doctor for help [ed: Hernan]. Meanwhile, the other family members dithered about. Bobo and Raquel had some kind of dramatic argument and maybe a threat of divorce. And Alex was so sweet with his warm brown eyes focused on MJ, referring to "nuestro hijo" and begging her not to die. Then the most drama of all: the doctor reveals that the ONLY POSSIBLE match for MJ's blood is (Tah-Dah!) BRUNO! Sorry, but that had me howling with laughter. I'm not sure that's medically accurate. Oh well, Alex was so sweet I could ignore the rest." [ed: well, considering on each show there's only one hospital with only one doctor and only one cop with a name, then I guess it would follow that there's only one person in the world who matches her blood type and that it would turn out to be Bruno...however, shouldn't that also mean that Raquel is a match?]

Anonymous adds:
"Bruno was also chastising Pimp Daddy E for giving Alex his cousin name. Maura and team Mexitrash were having a pow wow then who should crash it. The uninvited no attractive heifer Raquel. So that broke up quickly.

Ezeke was giving Alex Pimp Daddy's E's whereabouts when Alex had his accident. Then Alex ask where was Bruno Ezeke told Alex that Bruno was not at Merida also.

Ferdumbo was trying to make mother in denial think and see reason about Bruno good luck with that. Many have tried and well you guys know the rest. [ed: shoot! I thought he might have been getting through to her yesterday, oh well!]

Katia couldn't wait to tell about her new found skankism so she told Lissete who them told big sis Maura. Who then told Useless that they now have ammunition against Bruno to keep him in line. Good luck with that Maura. [ed: really? cause I thought she was almost 18, so what would it matter?]

Raquel and Roberto arguing again this woman is way too much work and drama. Even Useless gigolo supreme is tired of her act already. [ed: word!]

Did I not say Ferdumbo would tell Vicki that MJ is preggers. Vicki have the nerve to question if Alex is the father, or if it could be Mario Aguirre. Excuse me heifer did you not have a affair and got pregnant by a married man? What special water is this woman drinking? Bruno overhearing part of the conversation was then told by the other person who can't keep their mouth shut Vicki that MJ is pregnant. Well that did not sit well with Mad dog who's already jealous that Alex gets to ride in the helicopter. Bruno being his normal charming self to Ferdumbo to gets to stepping this is family business. Vicki temporarily deprive of her special water took umbrage that Bruno was being uncivilized to her boy toy. Told her precious Bruno the only person leaving the table right now was him. Bruno looking like he either swallow something that wasn't agreeing with him. I thinks it's called pride left in a state of shock, that his mother would address him in such a way in front of Ferdumbo.

Alex called Hernan for help for the blood transfusion. Hernan personally went to tell Vicki and Bruno that he was the only match for MJ. Vicki at first did not want Bruno to donate, I guess our girl finally found her water. Then she was convinced by Hernan that MJ needed the donation real quick. She and the baby would die. Ezeke went and got Bruno who was lamenting to his favorite Pimp about MJ getting pregnant by Alex. Bruno came back with Ezeke was informed by Hernan that they needed his blood for MJ to live. Bruno at first said to bad no way was he helping. Vicki pleaded with him to show some compassion and prove to everyone that he is not a monster. She knows he's a good person. I would say now Vicki has drunk a pitcher full of her special water." [ed: how Vicky doesn't end up with whiplash from her constant changing of opinions, I'll never know!]

CC and Cielo de Levy report that Alex now knows (a) about the baby, and (b) that it's his, and seems willing to take MJ's word for it...whew!

And in further news, direct from our comment section, Alex is hot. Like seriously hot. Like melt-your-tv hot. Like he-could-even-melt-M&M's-hot. Just, you know, in case you weren't aware of his hotness.

I shall dispense with any additional updates and hereby direct you to the comments where faithful viewers can provide you with any other information you need about this episode and/or the exact degree of Alex's hottitude. My eternal thanks!

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Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Gancho Tuesday Nov. 24, '09 Slap My A** And Call Me Sally, The Hot Sauce Hit The Fan Tonight!

Oh my yes, it was a dramatic episode tonight. Aldo under papa-drug surveillance, Connie driven to distraction by her cougar mama; and Beto and Sal, in full paranoid hysteria, barricaded in the xerox room. In the midst of all that, Mauricio, in his Furia Enmascarada outfit was purely an afterthought. But speaking of afterthoughts, is our Constanza with child? The nausea, pallor and need to vomit are all pointing towards pregnancy. If she faints, we'll know for sure.

We start, relatively calmly, with Salvador breaking up with Gabriela. Seems he can't get past the toupee incident, even though she's ready to forget that little contretemps. He's convinced it's one of many signs that they are not meant to be. After all, it's never come loose before.

And our beloved Connie is twisting the knife in Monita's tender flesh, taunting her with the fact that she has both Mauricio and Beto by the short hairs and intends to keep them both.

So much for old painful stuff. Let's move on to new discomfort. Xime, Jerry, Rolu and wheelchair arrive at Mauricio's for dinner. Terry is surprised and of course Mauricio is not there. But Jackie is, and it's lust at first sight for Jeronimo.

Mientras tanto, Estrella is worried about Monita handling her distress. For Estrella it's different. She's an actress. She can keep it all inside. Encapsulate it. But she's afraid Monita will explode.

Back to the big house. Jackie's moved into her second favorite topic (her first being, well...Jackie), the need for more servants. Rolu quips that he'd volunteer his wife but she can't cook. Jackie's charmed. You remind me of my third husband...or was it my fourth? Well, anyway, he was in a wheelchair. And poor Jean-Claude ...he survived three heart attacks only to die at sea. How many husbands in all? Well, five. Jerry's looking like he's ready to be number six, and Jackie's on board. There's some more chit-chat about the big scene over Aldo's drug use. The dismal state of the household. No drinking, no smoking. Jeez, let's get out of here and go eat someplace.

Off they go. Jackie, Jerry and Xime. But wait! Xime's forgotten something. What was it? Oh yes, her purse. Only after Rolu aggressively clears his throat, does she remember her "bulto", and who can blame her?

Over dinner, Jackie wants to know about the situation with Beto, Maurio and Connie. Xime starts to explain but gets hopelessly confused. Rolu suggests that she's most adorable when she spends half an hour in the bathroom so she obligingly runs off to the ladies' while Jackie remains
as mystified as ever.

Now to the dark side. Loriloca and Oscar are plotting in the coffee room, emptying a full flask of poison into Sal's coffee and cackling over his future "all expenses paid" vacation in a padded cell. The thought gets their hormones flaring and they decide consummation can't wait. Off they gambol to a secret trysting place. We'll serve the coffee later.

Enter Beto, under a barrage of complaints from Paula. Clean this place up and don't leave until you do. Of course he spots the coffee and the cookies and swills it all down while Oscar and Lori are romping elsewhere. Can paranoia be far behind?

Well, we have to wait to find out. We're now at the gym where Monita, Costeño and Cesar are trying to come up with names for the new luchador. Monita finally picks a winner with Furia Enmascarada and the scene switches to our sculpted Mau, trying on the swanky outfit and hood. Connie's knocking at the door but he puts her off. The secret is safe for now.

Our scummy lovers stagger back into the coffee room, clothes askew, to find to their horror that Beto has gulped down the poisoned brew. Yes, the hot sauce has hit the fan. (And for those of you who don't know...Slap My Ass And Call Me Sally is actually the name of a hot sauce, one that will burn you from one end to the other, evidently.) So Beto's roaming the office in full paranoid hysteria until finally barricading himself in the xerox room. Paula's pounding on the door, ordering him out, while Gaby tries the gentle approach. Neither one works. He wants his mommy and Monita. And he's scared! And poor Sal is about to join him. Lorenza has tracked him into his office, offering him more poisoned coffee to "calm his nerves" and he willingly slurps it down before peering furtively out the venetian blinds. Twitching and ticking to beat the band, of course. They're both scared.

And Mau is scared also. Scared that he can't trust Aldo anymore. So from now on, he's taking all three of them to school. And checking with the teachers and the principal. If there are any slipups, he'll find out immediately. As for Chubi, he's on his way to prison. Now, son, any more junk in the house? Aldo swears there isn't (and we're pretty sure cunning Jackie got it all) but the scene ends tenderly with Aldo saying "Papa, I love you." " I love you too, son."

Well, no love lost between Connie and Mom. Constanza is begging Mau to throw her maternal unit out and Mau, of course, is welcoming his suegra with all his heart. And what better time for Jackie to resurrect some old stories about daughter.? Her problems with whiskey. That time she caught her in her room with her piano teacher and way drunk. Mau's loving it. Connie not so much.

After our galan leaves, Jackie wants a heart to heart with Connie about Monita and this Fantasma Vengador, adding that "lucha libre no es nice". Connie doesn't want to chat so mom then suggests a perfect day of shopping, massages and whatnot. No way. Connie's feeling nauseous, like she wants to vomit (OH NO, PREGNANCY ALERT!) but Jackie thinks she's just bulimic. Leave me in peace, wails Connie. C'mon I'm your mom! is the retort.

And the staff won't leave Beto in peace either. The entire workforce has now gathered outside the door and Beto can feel their bad vibes. No way is he coming out. Sal, twitching and jerking, has an idea. Beto, I want to raise your salary. Interest. How about I make you director of planning and projects? More interest. Do I get status over Paula? Yes, and over Gabriela too. Way more interest. Can I come in? Yes, but just you. Tengo miedo, bleats Beto.

Alright. Great scene. Maybe it can't match Lalo and Xime's mating dance but it's pretty darn good. Sal and Beto have each found a soul mate. At last, someone else who worries about hidden microphones, cameras etc. And understands the need to whisper behind the hands, in case the enemy can read lips. It's a kind of infernal heaven. Or would be if only Mommy and Monita could be there. Because that's who Beto really wants to see. (Okay, I know it's "whom" but you don't really want me to write that, do you?)

Meanwhile Gaby and Lorenza are bickering outside the door over relative degrees of lunacy. In the midst of this, Lorenza uses the word "cordura" (sanity) and Gaby thinks she's sniping about her "gordura" (fatness) and sharp words are exchanged.

In the midst of all this chaos, who bounces out of the elevator but Xime , Rolu, and Jerry. The latter snarks that it's a typical day in the office, Beto and Sal, soul brothers to the core, barricaded in the xerox room. Riiiiight.

Time for a pow-wow with Oscar. Jerry thinks he has news but Oscar already knows about Aldo's drug problem. And he's sceptical about Jerry's new infatuation with Mau's mother-in-law. But just think, Oscar adds, relapses are common, and we can give Aldo a little "empujo" (push) back into drug use. Jerry, always the slower of the two, wonders why. Well, we need an "as bajo la manga" (an ace up our sleeve) in order to get Connie to divorce Mauricio. She'd never divorce him on her own. And we want our share of the spoils. So we'll have to move the chess pieces around so she has to bow out of the marriage.( Sounds good to me.)

While these two are hatching their plans, the elevator disgorges some more players....Jackie and Constanza. Mom is only moderately impressed with Mauricio's business office. Jean-Claude had a much bigger spread, with a golf course no less. Connie's getting all riled up but the last thing the office needs is another loca. And Paula's only too glad to tell Jackie all the other things her daughter is...like promiscuous, dishonest, underhanded, slutty, poisonous....I see you know her even better than I, smiles Jackie. Honestly, we thought about having an exorcism performed on her as a child. Too bad we didn't.

Another elevator eruption. This time the much longed for Nieves and Monita. Monita's banging on the door and yelling at Beto to open it, while Gabriela explains to Jackie that Moni is an "encanto de niña." A little discreet Jackie eye rolling ensues.

Beto and Sal are crazy on the inside. Connie's still going crazy on the outside. Mom is the problem. Jerry can't believe it. He's sure he'd have a great time with her. Yeah, try living just one week with her!, wails Connie. Done. I'll haunt her night and day, he promises.

Whoosh. Suddenly Sal evacuates from the room. Evidently Beto has let a big one. The stress of the situation, you understand. Although it cleared out Sal, Monita and Connie, undeterred by the aroma, are now hunkered down in the copy room with our paranoid paramour.

Mauricio...the last to arrive at this crazy party, is horrified.

But not Beto. I'm with the two women I love! he exults.

Previews: Jerry and Jackie are smooching.
Lorenza is talking on the phone about the poisoning of the coffee and Ximena overhears.
Beto is kissing Gabriela? Did I really see that? (recorder isn't working so I can't check.)
And Beto's in the copy room with Monita and Connie, ordering them to "love me" while performing his trademark lizard tongue move. Can't wait for Wednesday!

Vocabulary:
pasar bomba =have a great time, get along swell
acorralado = cornered
as bajo la manga= ace up one's sleeve
chuchuloco = crazy? Sal said it. All I could find in dictionary was "chuchumeca" which means hooker.
cordura = sanity, being on an even keel
gordura= plumpness, fatness
empujo = push

Dicho of the Day:

Dios los cria y ellos se juntan. Birds of a feather, flock together. Could apply to Beto and Sal now that they've both swallowed the same poisoned coffee. But I imagine their collusion is only temporary. Sure hope so. As for Oscar and Jeronimo. For sure. Oscar and Lorenza, yes. As for Jackie? We'll see who she fits with. (whom whom!)

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Amor Monday, November 23, 2009: A toast to the bride and doom

Friday: Alonso is trying to chase down the investigation that Inaki had done, but he’s doing it secretly, without telling Natalia. Carlota is looking at a travel brochure for Cabo, but Chris’s face appears before her in a magic circle and she gets a faraway lustful look. Camila is walking home with Orlando and tells him how Samuel is on the scene, but she can’t tell Romina how bad he really is because it would just piss her off more. Orlando doesn’t want Samuel to get the impression that Camila is alone, so, problem-solver that he is, he proposes to her, handily forgetting that she wanted to go out just as friends.

And that was just a few minutes of Friday’s show. Let’s see what tonight brings.

Orlando explains that since Em and Romina are getting married, and Samuel is in the wings, why, it’s just more logical than just living together. Camila says gosh thanks, but I was just saying the other day that I thought marriage of convenience isn’t a good idea. He says well, think about it and gives her a kiss. She backs away and says nice chatting with you and scurries in her giant iron door. I guess the city building code didn’t allow a moat.

Camila closes the door behind her and leans on it. The Rafa songs kicks in and she remembers kissing him.

Romina walks through and Camila asks about her dinner with Em. Romina says it was awful – Em doesn’t care about the baby. Camila says he will and wants to know if Romina gave up on the marriage idea. ¡Por supuesto que no! She’s going to marry him even if she has to bodily drag him to the altar.

At Natalia’s rented digs, her girlfriend Ivonne asks her what it’s like having Alonso around. Alonso, who was just approaching the kitchen where they are washing up, stops to eavesdrop. Natalia says it’s a little weird. The friend winkingly speculates about the bedroom and Natalia says it’s hard to relax when she remembers catching him with his secretary in that hotel room. Flashback of that. Natalia wonders who the woman was who tipped her off. We see a black and white flashback of Carlota calling Natalia to tell her.

Invonne speculates that it must’ve been someone who knew Natalia. No friend, says Natalia, but an enemy.

Paloma is tossing and turning and just can’t get to sleep. She looks at the message on her cell again, the one where Em tells her she’s the one he loves. Em is tossing and turning too. Why? he asks the telenovela gods, who look down on him, pick their teeth and grunt.

Em swears he’d marry Paloma in a heartbeat. And he wishes she was the one pregnant with his Emlette.

Natalia is asleep. Alonso contemplates her and strokes her hair and remembers her saying that she was tipped off about his affair. He gets up and flashes back on Carlota confronting him and his secretary in the hotel lobby and telling him he’s immoral and to stay away from her (Carlota).

Natalia wakes, and pats the bed. He cuddles up to her. This is a sweet little scene, but not steamy, as Alonso, being an older galan, is in a full set of men’s jammies, so there’s no bare-chested stuff.

Carlota, her room darkened with only a table candelabra burning, calls Chris who was asleep and so didn’t have the presence of mind to check caller ID. She breathily tells him that he’s become an obsession and she will do whatever he desires. Just ask! Chris says I’m asking you do remember I’m a man of the cloth, goodbye. He hangs up.

Carlota is thoughtful. She slowly licks her fingers and snuffs out one candle. You’re making me do it, she thoughtbubbles. She pinches another one out. You won’t give in. Snuff. You’re going to pay a big price.

The night of a thousand porqués has passed and finally it’s morning. Paloma, all dressed for school, is sad. She asks Rufi how she’s can live without Em. Rufi hugs her. Paloma says she wishes she could leave town today, but the thing with Natalia didn’t work out since Alonso is back, so maybe she’ll take Dr B up on his offer. Rufi says maybe she’ll get lucky and she won’t need a protector to help her realize her dreams. Paloma says what makes you say stuff like that? Rufi says life is full of surprises and miracles. Paloma says she doesn’t believe in those anymore. She’s going to go see Dr B.

Rufi says I’m not going to leave you alone in the world. Whither thou goest, there go I … if you want me to. Paloma says of course I do – you’re all I’ve got, and she hugs Rufi tenderly.

Aw, Rafa has brought Em breakfast in bed. He remembered that when Em was little, he liked pancakes, so he made him some. Em is grateful, and says he couldn’t sleep. He says no point it talking about the decision, it’s all set. Rafa says he just wanted to know how Em is feeling about it.

Em says he was thinking how much Rafa did for him, even if he wasn’t his biological son, and Em wants to do as much for a child who actually is his. Rafa says that’s great, but I don’t see how you have to go as far as to marry the mother. Em says Romina has a whim of iron; she makes sure things go her way.

R: I’m doubting it will last. Why don’t you just have a civil ceremony? E: That’s what I want to do. R: And what about Paloma? E: I’m going to talk to Paloma and break it off, though it kills me to give her up.

Romina flounces down to breakfast. Camila warns her that getting what you want can cost big time. Romina tells her to stop lecturing, put her two boyfriends on hold and start organizing the wedding. It’s going to be in a couple of weeks. She needs a dress, the church, there’s the honeymoon, etc. etc. Em’s not helping, she says, so you better, or do you want me to ask my father?

Camila brings her breakfast, but, baby or no, she doesn’t want to eat – she wants to look good on her wedding day. She wants to be the most beautiful bride Real del Monte has ever seen.

Diana is still in bed, but her mind is plenty awake. She flashes back on seeing Rafa kiss Camila and swears revenge. She has to think of something!

Juanita the maid comes and on her way out checks her cell. Diana demands it, takes it from her, roots through her purse and finds some cash to throw at her and tells her to get another. Juanita protests that all her contacts are in there, but Diana orders her out.

Diana dials up Camila on Juanita’s cell. She holds a hand partway over the receiver to conceal her voice. She tells Camila that she’s a shameless, immoral hussy. She hangs up and giggles. Camila stares at the phone and then hits callback. Juanita’s cell rings while Diana ignores it and says You don’t know who you’re messing with.

Carlota is at the church thrift shop and Hilda, a church lady, thanks her for helping. Carlota says the house is so empty without Macarena. She wonders if Chris is expected. Hilda sighs and says what a great guy. He should be coming pretty soon.

Em is peeking through the school fence at Paloma, who’s talking with Lili. She tells Lili that there’s no point in her talking to Em. Lili says she doesn’t believe Romina, but Paloma observes that Romina might lie, but test results don’t. Paloma wants to put it out of her mind – she doesn’t want to end up bitter like Carlota. In the distance, Em thoughtbubbles how pretty Paloma is and how he loves her.

German pulls up and gets out of his car. He tells Em he’d like to talk, that he wishes they could be friends like before. Em shakes his hand and says okay, but nothing in his life is going to be like it was before. He walks off.

Romina has stopped by to see Diana, who seems to be dressed to go out. Diana asks after Camila and says gosh, they haven’t talked in a long time. She wants to know what Camila thinks of Romina’s plans. Romina says she’s a pain, and she’s busy with her galans. Galans? says Diana.

Romina ignores that and tells her that Samuel has showed up. But the main thing is that she told Em yesterday and he was so cold. Diana says don’t worry, he’ll be grateful you gave him a child. You can count on me 100%. She hugs Romina.

At the ceramics factory, trusty sidekick Joel asks Rafa what’s wrong. Rafa tells him he’s worried about Em. Joel tsks about somebody trapping a guy with a baby in this day and age. They both agree that Em should just have visitation rights. Rafa says yes, but if Romina runs away like Diana did, Em will be devastated.

Joel says I’d hate to be in Em’s shoes. Rafa says nor in mine – Camila doesn’t want anything to do with me. I wish I could tell her everything, but I promised Orlando so he wouldn't blab everything he knows about Diana. Joel suggests he re-talk it with Orlando; things always come to light sooner or later no matter what anyway. You’ve already suffered enough for Diana’s misdoings. Do something for you.

Orlando comes in to work and gives Angie a cheerful hug. He’s stoked because things are looking up with Camila – they might even get married. Angie says are you ready to accept the whole package, namely Romina? Orlando says she’s marrying Em and moving out. Camila will be lonely. It’s the perfect time to step in.

At her shop, Camila tells Meche and Monica about the weird phone call. They figure it’s somebody who hates her. Diana says she can’t think about that because right now she feels like Romina’s about to drive her life right into a wall and there’s nothing she can do about it.

Carlota comes home thoughtbubbling about how she shot a whole morning at the thrift shop and Chris never showed. He might be hiding, but he doesn’t have stand a chance. Sooner or later, he’ll fall for her.

Rufi wants to know if she remembered to pick up the groceries she was going to get. Carlota forgot, but will go back out.

Pedro, the church maintenance guy, tells Chris that Carlota came looking for him several times, but didn’t say what she wanted. She was acting kinda weird, like she was jealous. He says he’s known her a long time and never saw her acting like that.

Chava comes in because Meche sent him and Chris tries to talk to him about alcohol. Fortunately this scene is mercifully brief.

Natalia is talking to Ivonne, who thinks that Alonso was acting a little mysterious. Natalia didn’t notice. She tells Ivonne about how Paloma wanted to come to Mexico City with her, but now that Alonso’s back on the scene, that didn’t work out. She didn’t want to tell Alonso.

Ivonne says did you tell her that she has an inheritance? Natalia says she wanted to consult with Chris and Rufi first.

Whoops, I spoke too soon. The alcohol chat Chris is having with Chava continues, and for some reason, Pedro is working nearby during this very personal conversation. Anyway, Chris finally gets his breakthrough: He brings Chava to realize that getting totally wasted time to time means he is actually an alcoholic.

I guess it’s night again, because it sure is dark in Emiliano’s office. The light from his laptop shines its blue light on his face, and Orlando comes in and sits in a dark corner. He says he heard about the positive DNA test and would like to offer Em and Romina an apartment to start their married life. Em says thanks but no.

Orlando says don’t be so stiff-necked. Plus you’ll be my heir when I die anyway. I’d work like a donkey to give you whatever you want. Pick one out and let me know.

Em says You pick one and we’ll go with that. I don’t want anything to do with this stupid wedding. Orlando says might as well put a on a happy face, as long as you have to do it. Em snaps that he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to the idea – he’s in love with Paloma, not Romina.

At the art school, Lili tells Paloma she wants to come to her exhibition in Pachuco and she wants to go with Eric. That way she can meet his family, plus he might know some nice guys for Paloma to meet. Paloma says she doesn’t want to forget Em and she doesn’t want to fall in love ever again.

Lili says you don’t want to turn into your Tia Carlota, plus you can’t just live like you’re on a desert island. Okay, says Paloma. I need friends, but I lost Inaki and now I’ve lost Em and I can’t take any more losses. In the background, the nameless brunette girl from the other day listens sympathetically, looking like she’s desperately trying to get her face on camera, acting her heart out as best she can with no lines to work with.

Camila is on the phone with Romina who is at home. She promises to go with her to Pachuco to look for a wedding dress. Romina says I need to you to have all your afternoons free from now until the wedding.

Naturally Meche comes up to ask Camila if something is bothering her, which gives Camila the opportunity to say not only anonymous phone calls, Orlando wanting to get married, and Samuel showing up, but she’s worried about Romina being all taken up with dresses and cakes and parties, all the wedding stuff, and not even worrying that her future husband doesn’t love her.

Meche says they can always divorce later. Camila says I know the marriage is going to be a disaster.

Piggy-eyed Samuel is hanging out in a nice bar, looking like the lounge lizard that he is. He calls his hotel to see if either Romina or Camila have left messages. Nope. He decides that he needs to invest in order to profit, so he tells the hotel lady to order up a huge arrangement of red roses and send them to the ladies.

Carlota is stepping out into the street when lo and behold, Alonso stops her. They trade a few smirking barbs and he tells her that he came not just to be with Natalia, but also to see her.

Paloma and Lili are leaving school. Paloma gets a text message from Em saying I have to see you, even if it’s for the last time. Meet me at my father’s apartment. Lili encourages her to go and to let him speak his heart, plus she’s sure Paloma wouldn’t want to go through life thinking she’d left something unsaid. Paloma says she doesn’t think she can bear saying goodbye.

Lili says it’s going to hurt no matter what. You might as well have a good goodbye.

Carlota says to Alonso Coffee with you? Don’t make me laugh. After the way you acted after your son’s death, and after the way you were acting in Mexico City! Such manners.

Alonso says such principles! Are you equally strict with yourself? Carlota says excuse my commenting (see how well-mannered she is?), but I’m amazed that your wife forgave your infidelity.

Alonso says I wanted to ask your pardon. Carlota says is surprised and says finally you realize. Alonso says I lost my head. Grief, you know. Carlota says okay, let’s not talk about unpleasant memories.

He observes that he’s heard she has a very good reputation in town. Carlota says that comes from a life properly lived over the years. Yes, says Alonso. I don’t know how I could have thought you were a murderer. Carlota’s eyes get a little slitty. And how much you care for the well-being of your niece, he continues. He thanks her again for accepting his apology and off she goes.

Alonso thoughtbubbles that he promised he would never take his eyes off her. I promise you, my son, that I will unearth the truth.

Avances: Romina reports to Carlota that Em is going to marry her and both gloat. Paloma and Em meet for a final farewell.

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un Gancho al Corazón Mon 11/23/9 Don't Think, Let Your Mind Go Blank


Before any new stuff we're treated to a delightful repeat of Ximy playing a little grab the purple butt with Lalo. She makes the experienced observation that indeed they're nicely sculpted, very espojados (spongy), and certainly real. She almost swoons. "Some think they've been injected they're so perfect," he admits.

Mao and Aldo get things going with a little papi/escuincle chat which goes nowhere. Given a chance to come clean with dad and faced with the certainty of being outed by Estrella, Aldo (who may soon be all done) selects the logical adolescent answer... he lies. "Nopis, nothing goin' on here. Thanks for asking." He desperately reaches for the phone as Mao exits. Gosh, I wonder who he might be calling.

Who could have guessed? Estrella's strategy session with Moni back at Moni's place is interrupted by her cell phone. "Estrella Falcón, actriz." Yep, it's Aldo who tries to persuade Estrella not to talk with his dad. Moni takes the phone and chews Aldo's ear over his little stroll down drug alley. Everything they have done has been for him and his sisters. He seems disturbed, but more by the inconvenience of being discovered than by actual guilt.

Meintras tanto, Jacqui, in the solitude of her room is making preparations to destroy Aldo's stash... a little at a time. Candles are lit, bud has been bundled into an easy to manage wrap, no doubt Jimi's Experience is cued up on her Ipod and wearing a single inexplicable glove (perhaps an homage to the King of Pop?) she settles in to relax in the warm glow of smoldering herb. Alas, she is thwarted by the sudden entrance of her vigilant spawn, KnK (Koni and Katia) who completely misinterpret her noble effort in the War on Drugs. Busted! I ask once again, doesn't anyone bother to knock in this show?

Monita is still on the phone, "I'm sorry Aldo, Mauricio needs to know." Aldo whines and wheedles (a talent well-honed by most druggies) and convinces Moni to give him a chance to handle things and change. She relents. Estrella has her well-founded doubts. The drug-bust of Jaqui may render this a moot point.

Jaqui is trying to convince KnK that she is just practicing a little mild form of stress-reduction, with candles, meditation, and relaxation... yoga. She has been under a lot of stress lately. I should say so what with Jon Clod's unfortunate tumble off the boat (even if impeccably dressed). That certainly must have taken its toll. Coni wants her out of her house. Hey Missy, that's your mommy who lugged your sorry (albeit lovely) little butt around in her womb for nine months. Show a little respect.

Points to Aldo, he wants to have a daddy to drug fiend chat with Mao after all, but they are stymied by hurricane Connie, who has her own more pressing concerns. "Hey look what mom was about to light up!" or words to that effect, she shrieks as she hands over exhibit A to Mao who dutifully sniffs it as though he has some idea of what she's taking about. He probably has some inkling that it is not a wholly wholesome thing because he complains to Jacqui about bringing such as this into a house with impressionable children. All the while, Aldo is wishing he were in Philadelphia. Oops. Suddenly all eyes are on Aldo as Jaqui, tiring of being the center of attention (perhaps for the first time in her life) gallantly focuses the spotlight on Aldo. "I took them from Aldo. He's the one with a serious drug problem!" What time does that bus leave for Philly?

Monita is helping Alicia pack. She's been here a while, what like six months? and though she hates leaving Moni with all that is going on but she needs to check on the old homestead, water the plants. My guess is that a motorcycle gang have probably taken it over by now. Nieves drops by and does a nice job of concealing her disappointment over Alicia's departure. Oh well, there was only room enough for one alpha bitch in this little enclave. Perhaps it's for the best.

Back at the manse Aldo is now wishing for the earth to swallow him whole, shoes, socks, and all. Everyone divides him up, each selecting a savory body part to chew on. Even Katia joins in the feeding frenzy. Let's just say, I'm betting that Aldo wishes he'd had a chance to toke up before being set upon by by this school of starving piranhas. I'm glad that the Femsibs weren't witnesses to this metaphorical mutilation of their big brother. I will say that Jacqui offers feeble (the least she can do after lighting the fuse) support by accusing Coni of being too hard on her son, and for her trouble Coni redirects some of her ire at her maternal unit. "Five minutes later and I would have caught her smoking this stuff." Jaqui announces that she is about to put on her three thousand, did she say dollar? shades... Coni has her on the verge of tears and she doesn't want to be a spectacle. Coni speculates that Aldo will need a rehab center and maybe then military school.

Monita is feeding her fish, a Beta I think, which would be an appropriate for a boxeadora, sort of a guppified gallo. Now how sweet is this? Nieves has brought some going away tortas for Alicia. However Alicia is somewhat unappreciative and tosses the sack unceremoniously into the open suitcase, as the undaunted and forgiving Nieves helps her with her packing.

Now Coni and Mao are arguing over jurisdiction. They'rre his kids. He'll decide what to do with Aldo. Hold on, Buster. Actually Coni has legal custody and ultimately responsibility. Now Jaqui wades in (this lady may not have a spare but she certainly has a pair) with the reminder that she's the only experienced mama here, so she'll give the advise. Coni says no thanks and Jacqui appeals for backup from Katia. Nopis. As Coni and Mao continue to bicker, Aldo, disgusted makes a laudable but unsuccessful attempt, "I'm outta here!"and actually turns to leave. Mao impedes him. Not so fast buckaroo, this is your party. Mao asks him where he bought these drugs. Coni graciously answers for him, "Where do yo think? The 'hood where Mona and that zorra (here certainly meaning whore) Estrella and all that pedarajal (vicious people...thanks Jarocha!).

Nieves is still helping Alicia pack. They gently verbally spar as they take turns arranging and rearranging the contents of Alicia's luggage. Moni is amused by their good-spirited banter. Nieves wants Alicia to be able to make an early start.

Coni and Mao are still at it, same song, umpteenth verse. Aldo is getting weary of it and so are we. Have the rest of you noticed that virtually every boring, tedious conversation is always 1/2 Mauricio. Now this is funny, Jaqui opens her arms to embrace a beset upon Aldo. He respectfully dodges the offer. Mao blames a lot of this on Coni for separating the kids from him and packing them off to that horrible school. Jacqui then tries to remind them that they are recently married. Mao takes this opportunity to share with his mother-in-law the grisly details of their little arrangement. "Our marriage is a farce..."

Now this is not funny. Luisa and Dani rush in flanked by Terri. Well great. They have over heard much of this little dramatic feast featuring their adored brother as the entree. Mauricio promptly orders the girls to their room. Aldo, too as he reminds Terri that Aldo is strictly confined to quarters. Not wishing to be out-tyranted, Coni orders her mother to her room. Jacqui points out that although she is certainly appears younger and more youthful than she is, she is no child. Coni persists. Jaqui relents. She takes Katia with her.

Now, shades of Reefer Madness; Aldo goes into a drug deprived rage in his room, tossing his backpack, which he gives a nimble little kick, and bedding about, rejecting a plea from Luisa to let her in. He tosses the pillow at the door for emphasis. Wooo. He doesn't want to talk to anyone. Too bad there wasn't a piano handy when he was toking.

Our newlyweds finally get to spend some quality time together. Alone at last. Well, one might at least hope in a crisis they might try to pull together as a family. But no, he is going to take the bull by the horns and find out who sold Aldo the wackyweed, meaning of course a little trip to the barrio. "Not without me you don't!" scolds Coni, ever the wet blanket.

Terri is consoling Dani. Shouldn't Mauricio be doing this? They are joined by Luisa. Terri tries to reassure them that everything is going to be alright, but at this point in her young life, Luisa knows better. "We have to make Aldo feel loved and wanted so he can move forward," She counsels. This loses some of it's consoling quality when she punctuates it with "¡Oh Dios mio!¡Dios mio!" Thanks Terri, that helped.

Now a glimpse of bonding between a mod-mom and her daughter. Jaqui is complaining to Katia about Coni's defiant lack of respect. She still knows best. After all, she is the mom. She continues to deny any intention of using drugs. She observes to Katia that Coni and Mao have a dysfunctional marriage. Wow! Nothing gets by this lady. "Now tell me, how did Coni ever maneuver Mauricio into matrimony?"

Allow me a moment to observe, this is a very beautiful actress and the young whippersnappers here could learn a thing or two about speaking Spanish from her. Her words are crisp and clearly enunciated. I hope I run into her or someone just like her on Isla Mujeres. We'll skip the ganja.

In her apartment Moni and Beto are sharing a moment. She tells him about Nieves and Alicia, he asks about her bid to reclaim her belt. He offers his help. They after all were and are a team. Huggies! Hey who invited him? It's Mauricio, scowling. And her? Yikes! It's Coni, double-scowling. Now classic telenovela stuff with meaningful angst-ridden close-ups of each accompanied by ominous percussion.

Now this is why I come here. It's my new favorite couple (well, after Jerkoff Jerónimo and Oily Oscar), 'Xotic Ximena and Lushus Lalo, engaged in some sort of curious foreplay, much like birds of the Carribean, the male colorfully and conspicuously plumed, and the female more drably but yet attractively arrayed. Lalo in a comisa rayada llamativa (striped shirt) and purple pantalones. Ximy all in grey. It works. She is conflicted. She notes that he is as stressed as she. his glúteos are tense (agarratados). Modestly he knows but wants her to relax. Five strawberry daquiris and she's still tense.. "OK, what you need is a back massage." She agrees, "¡Ah ha! ¡Eso!" she melts.

Confrontation. Mao lights into Beto, he blames him for corrupting Aldo. Coni objects,"Don't blame Beto." Beto denies. Moni has his back. Mao persists. "Yeah, blame the dark-skinned man ( péguenle el negro),"Beto objects Coni slanders and accuses Estrella who isn't even here. "Estrella's an actress not a mujerzuela (loose woman)." Coni counters, "What in triple X movies?" She implies that Estrella puts powder up her nose and then she insults both Moni and Estrella, calling them ofrecidas, trepadoras, and busconas (basically loose, social climbing whores) Moni goes ballistic but is restrained by Beto. Coni mentions how Beto was groping (manoseando) her when they walked up. Now our little monkey is peeved and spills the soup," We were embracing (abrazando), but perhaps Mauricio would be interested to know who Beto was groping and embracing a while back." Whoa, let's see them round this horse up. Beto bites his lip.

Our newest twosome are bonding. Lalo is massaging, Ximy speaks but Lalo admonishes her, "Don't think, let your mind go blank." Now this is just too easy, even for me. I'm just going to leave that out there on the floor. I respect Ximena way too much. Shame on you Lalo!

Oh sweet Jesús López! This may be the funniest scene I've ever seen anywhere. Having emptied her mind (no, I still refuse to touch this) Ximena has an epiphany. It's almost too frightening to speak of it. Lalo must go and if you haven't seen this scene first hand, you must do whatever it takes to do so. Suffice it to say... she is smitten. "Now I understand what Coni (mi amigozosa) feels when el Fantasma Vengador touches her. Once again Cupid is off his mark...or is he just a perverse chubby little fart?

Coni, Mau, Moni, and Beto are talking. Mao wonders why he should be interested in who Beto is embracing and groping. Oh you poor dopey lug. Beto suggests that Mao stay out of his intimacies. Moni says,"Shut up Beto!" A nervous Coni reminds Mao that they are there looking into Aldo's recent indiscretions. Mao asks if Estrella has any thing to do with this. Moni says of course not, that she just found out and they pretty well told Mao everything she knows over the phone. Coni bristles at this wondering if Mao may have breeched their agreement, but Mao points out that it was Estrella who made the call. As if on cue, Estrella joins them. She of course is very concerned for Aldo and wants to speak to Principe. She starts to lead him away and Beto moves to follow. Moni pushes him back, this doesn't concern him. Coni follows trying to push Moni back eventually four of them, Esrella, Moni, Coni and Mao, have all found their way into Estrella's apartment.

Ximena is trying to have a chat with her hermanolfo, Jero, but he is not interested. This of course doesn't deter our Ximy from pouring out her soul to him. She is not happy with her relationship with Rolu. He refuses to even touch her and now she's starting to have strange feelings toward Lalo who is like a sister to her. Jero is even less interested than before. He doesn't care a pepino for her troubles. He suggests that she tell it to Mauricio, and then offers to smother her with a throw pillow. Ximena's been there and done that, "¡Nooo!"

The conversation at Estrella's continues.Mauricio is understandably a bit edgy and snappish. Coni is especially crabby but we'll give her a pass cause she's still looking so darn good in that little golden and clingy in the right places dress. Estrella wants to discuss Aldo but asks if Mao is sure he wants to talk in front of ésta (that) indicating Coni with a subtle head tilt. Coni is righteously offended and ups the ante by accusing Estre, ésta, of violating Aldo. Mao tries to rein her in, but he clearly has no control of the rampant estrogenic egos involved.Coni accuses Estrella of providing Aldo with the drugs. Estrella gives up Chubi. "Cristian arrested him. He's in jail." Jeez, it took a lot to finally get to this point.

More Ximy and Jero. She's been thinking and thinking, "You don't think," he corrects. She continues, She likes his idea of consulting with her primuchi (Mao). A dinner party... now Jero's onboard. He'll go too and size up the forbidden fruit (Coni). He's glad he thought of it.

Moni's sad. She gives the heavy bag a few half-hearted jabs and remembers Mao telling her that even though married there'll be no hanky-panky between him and Coni. A knock at the door. That's unusual. Well look who's here. The momia in the flesh. Oh my, she's here sowing seeds of doubt. Moni throws out the first pitch wondering how it must be for Coni being in a loveless marriage with a husband who won't even touch her. Coni swings at the high-hanging curve and connects big time. She admits that's she an insatiable sex machine. Moni can check with Beto on that. She then adorns this truth with strings of lies about the marital bliss she enjoys. Moni says that she doesn't believe a word of it. No matter, Coni presses.Maybe Moni could join a convent or perhaps find a loyal orangutan in an ecological preserve that she can make happy.

Mao confronts Chubi in jail. He wants in the cell with him. Does he think that Cristian just fell off the guyaba truck? Negativo, Sr. Sermeño. Not allowed." No problem, the doltish Chubi ambles up to the bars. Mao grabs. Mao threatens. Cristian calms. Mao releases. Chubi backs. "Hey, I remember you. You go out with Moni. I've known her all my life." See what drugs do to you, kiddies? Heck he was just helping a friend. He didn't even know how old Aldo is. Mao threatens some more telling Chubi that he's done peed on the wrong boots. He promises a long time in prison for Chubi. Can he do that? Guess not. Cristian apprises him of the right to remain silent and escorts him away. Chubi wishes he had a fatty right about now.

Moni gives it another shot. I know that Mauricio won't touch you because you disgust him. "That what he told you?" "Lies." And here you've got to hand it to Coni, she too, has quite a pair. Moni shouts, "Get out!" She pulls out her pepper spray and points it at Moni. "I have Mauricio as my husband and Beto as my lover and I intend to keep both. One day I might have a hankering for chocolate ice cream and the next vanilla. The thing I enjoy most is, nothing you can do about it."

Pau is about to leave and notices that Gabi looks dejected. Gabi is looking to vent about Sal's deteriorating mental health. Pau's more interested in when Gabi found out about Sal's wig. "In the shower together?" "See you tomorrow, Paula." Sal comes out twitching and jerking. He's worse than ever. She invite him to dinner. He declines and babbles paranoid suspicions. She asks if he's breaking up with her. Get this man to the Dr.!

Coni taunts Moni hinting at the terrible fates awaiting the kiddos if Moni should try to get near Mao. She reminds Moni of the terms of the prenup. "Get out!" "I'm going. Give Roberto a kiss for me. Want me to give Mauricio a kiss for you?" "Get out!" "I'm going, go climb out on the limb of your tree to sleep like the monkey (changa) you are." "And you coil (enroscar) up like the serpiente that you are." "Oh, I'll coil up... on Mauricio." Moni gives the heavy bag a few frustrated punches. Bout goes to Coni. TKO.

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Monday, November 23, 2009

Sortilegio #34, 11-23: Two French kissing episodes and a trick dog

I haven't watched this show for a week and a half so I'm not sure how much of what we saw was previouslies...

Chucho is in Saqui and reports back to Alex on how things are going. Alex is mortified that his father-in-law is shlepping suitcases for tips and decries MJ's stubbornness. She won't answer her cellphone. She and Paula wear awful pink faux-native garb and work in a tchotchke store.

Maura is having a big ol' Beautiful People Party. Everybody looks pretty except Alex who drags his butt in there with his shirt unbuttoned and a lot of bristle on his face. He is haggard but goes along with the french-kisses Maura lands on him. Bruno watches with glee.

Later Bruno tells Maura he knows all about the faux-Mario scheme she deployed with help from Useless and that gigolo husband with the stupid hair triangle on his chin I forget his name, and says she (Maura) better come see him (Bruno) tomorrow.

Filipa is whiling away the empty hours teaching her dog to beg while Vic complains how big and quiet the house is. Sadly, that quiet state is shattered by the shrewish entrance of Raquel who, mortified to hear she wasn't invited to the Beautiful People Party, takes it out on the dog, shrieking "It has to go outside." Vic says no it doesn't, Raq says don't I have any rights around here, Vic sez yes you do but not at the expense of mine.

So Raq gets into it about Vic's embarrassing behavior and says why shouldn't Bruno get the Presidency and then there wouldn't be scandal, this is all your fault, but Vic points out if Bruno weren't blackmailing her there also wouldn't be a problem, and goes through the reasons why Bruno shouldn't be prez, and Raq hits her with the cradle-robbing-romance thing, and Vic says I'm that close to running you - and your parasite of a husband - out of here, and stomps out, and Felipe points out to Raq that Vic is tired of Raq's ingratitude...

... and Vic drives the Rolls Royce over to Fer's, I guess they've been shunning each other's company since Raq caught them doing something? But they smooch finally in the car, he too has a very scratchy looking beard but Vic doesn't mind, then Vic sez no we can't do this. Eventually Fer says well at least we can meet as often as possible and we can always go up to the Native Persons Palace we are building and mess around there...

... and Raq calls Useless to complain about everything but he's too busy making time with some Beautiful Person and doesn't take the call so Raq throws around a lot of glassware....

... meanwhile at the Beautiful People Party Alex is ready to go home. Maura gets in one last kiss and tries to get him to invite her for dinner next day, he is evasive. He goes to get Katia (Fer's sister) but she doesn't wanna go home; Bruno sez he'll deliver her later.

Home, haggard Alex hears Vic is gone. All are in a tizzy. He goes and yells at Raq for fighting with Vic and calls her a bitter egotist. Snap!

So Fer drives Vic home and Vic enters to everybody going, where you been? as if she were a teenager. And she says, "everybody judges me and yells at me," just as a teenager would.

In Saqui, Paula and MJ whisper about Chucho being Alex's spy. "He doesn't trust me," seethes MJ. "Maybe he's just worried about you," counters Paula.

Chucho reports to Alex. Alex then frets to Fer about how stubborn his in-laws, and his wife, are. Fer points out it was Alex's fault for not trusting her. Now, he should either believe she was whoring around and forget her, or admit he made a mistake and ask her forgivenness. "Tell me about you and ma," counters Alex. "Best you ask her," counters Fer.

Blah blah blah the goatee-husband, Useless, and Maura are all a-flutter about Bruno knowing their little faux-Mario scheme. Roberto says he's having nothing to do with it.

Maura goes to Bruno's and he blackmails her, his favorite trick. He says: go along with all my plans to make Alex miserable or I'll tattle on you. She says go ahead.

MJ and Paula are in their little tchotchke store when menacing music strikes up. Some thugs come in and run out with the money from the cash registers - but not before stabbing MJ in the back and knocking Paula down! About a thousand people watch as the ambulance takes them to the hospital. Turns out Paula is just bruised up a bit but MJ has lost a lot of blood, is now anemic, and has broken ribs. She needs a transfusion - Paula offers willingly.

Their dad knows nothing about the robbery and stabbing - he is tippling with Chucho, who has heard that his cousin (the lying young man with scruples) will indeed walk again. Chucho asks how's the suitcase-shlepping biz, he's thinking of going into it himself. "What, you'd compete with me?" "No, let's be partners."

Fer and Vic are conFerring happily over the Native Persons Palace when Alex drags hisself in, he was too downhearted to work today. He droops on by the lovebirds.

Vic can't believe he would be so torn up about his two-timing low-status wife. Fer doesn't look very pleased with this take on things and pressures her to admit she knows inside that Bruno has been up to something very shady having to do with MJ. "But - my son is a monster?" she asks weakly.

Alex has called Erick into his study and is interrogating him fiercely. He, a chauffeur all these years, never heard of Mario Aguirre? Many questions, Erick's lying answers are unconvincing. "Who did Paula hit?" Erick can't remember.

Erick is ejected from Alex's study and calls Bruno, who is naked curled around Fer's naked young sister. Wonder what they've been up to?

All Bruno cares about though: "Did you compromise me?"

Tomorrow: Alex finds out his wife's been stabbed.

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