Caray, Caray!

Labels: abismo

Well, things have certainly taken a turn for the worse for many of our heroes, but we are in the end times of "ultimos capitulos" and that is to be expected. In fact, the end is quite near. The final episode will air on MAY 23!

As usual, I couldn't really tell when the review of yesterday's episode ended and today's began. The first scene of interest to me was the shocking discovery that Vice has been sleeping with Monica's mom! After the two, ahem, finish, Vice lights up a cigarette and admits that he married Candi. Violeta is disappointed in his poor taste. Then he reveals that, despite having what he'd wanted for so long, he doesn't feel any satisfaction (between silly pecks of kisses). He is missing something, some kind of true emotion. Candi breaks up the psychology session when she calls to enquire about her husband's whereabouts.

In jail, Pancho is threatened (and indeed, strangled) by a bald prisoner named Tarzan. I didn't really catch the reference to gargoyles, but maybe it's another case of Pancho's use of Spanish (gárgola/garganta) referring to the throat being throttled. Fortunately, our hero gets out a word or two, and wins Tarzan over with a promise to protect the big man's family.

At Avon, Chacho thinks Sandra is depressed because of his faulty sperm, but it's actually something she is afraid to tell him about [as the viewers know, she saw the mysterious Don David but has been threatened and warned not to tell anyone].

Poor Doc Oc is finally losing his marbles. Pepe and la Sirenita bring him a cake, but he doesn't remember them at first. He is quite scattered, but they have a very sweet visit anyway. Later, at dinner, Monica mentions that she thinks he should have companionship. It is decided that Rebe's mom will go take care of the good doctor.

We get a split shot of Rebe and Pancho each trying to sleep without the other. Rebe is snuggling her stuffed Pancho. How sweet!

Vice's efforts to sneak in after his escapade are for naught, as Candi finds a lipstick-print (labial) on her hubby's shirt (I must have missed the episode where this dummy cancelled her divorce. why?) and proceeds to mildly flip out. He manages to shut her up with some dumb excuse about kissing a client on the cheek and the client missing and kissing his shirt instead of his face, but she takes the issue to Chela for further discussion.

Chela has been mostly relegated to baby duty since Enzo quit his job and the pair moved back to Mexico city. On a side note, these babies are pretty bad fakes. Their faces are visibly plastic, they never blink, and their bodies are stiff. Anyway, Chela is the voice of reason, and tries to talk some sense into stupid Candi. "He cheated on Pina, and now you think he's somehow different?"Then Chela busts out a phrase that I positively adore and I think my mom will to: she refers to Vins as a "burro sin mecate -" a donkey without a leash! As well we know, a donkey without a leash will make a beeline for the nearest succulent morsel.

Meanwhile, Ana has gone undercover to extract the truth about Pancho from Fred. She accidentally kissed him (I think it was yesterday), leading to a breakup with Adrian (who has no idea what her kissing Fred has to do with protecting her father). There are numerous scenes of her uneasily making out with Freddy.

With his Tarzan problem resolved, a friendly visit from Enzo (who has been having heart palpitations or something - will we have *another* heart attack in this show) and Temo, and hope of being released, Pancho is feeling a bit better. But the soggy-cigar-spewing dragon-lady of a directora has other plans. Her flunky, a skeevy-looking dude in a suit, comes with a guard to throw Pancho in a "calabozo," solitary confinement. It's basically a darkened closet made of shoddily-painted styrofoam (the rats chew through it with ease), but it's lonely and there's no food and little water. Pancho begins to joke around with the rats in a very familiar way. He tells one of them that he looks like Iracheta!

Vins keeps taking off work at midday to rendezvous with Violeta. Seriously, couldn't they have found someone for the job of president who would actually do some work? Oh yeah, no one works in telenovela white-collar offices. Anyway, at their latest meeting, he boasts about what he did to Pancho but whines about "Señor Don David's" extortion. Violeta, though, has a plan to unmask the little devil.

Pancho's lawyer, at the mansion, has clearly been fed a line. He tells the family that Pancho was thrown in solitary for his involvement in a fight.

Enzo has been reviewing security footage from before the cameras went down, and he has zeroed in on the presence of a strangely smiley-faced man interacting with Sandra in the final moments. Somehow, he manages to get the face unobscured, and shows what he found to the ladies. They are impressed.

Beca comes to the jail to yell at la directora, who unleashes all kinds of dragon lady crankiness on her. Basically the woman is frustrated that not everyone treats her like a god (and she says as much). The cigar-sucking-and-spewing is getting really gross. Maybe she just needs some lovin'. Who on the show could we set her up with? Vicente?

Anselmo (the sympathetic guard) sneaks Pancho a decent meal, which he shares with his rodent buddies.  Then the directora busts in, yells at Pancho, and has her suit-wearing flunky (probably the only person who gives her the respect she desires) spray him with a hose.

Labels: familia

Labels: Talisman

Labels: familia

Dear fellow recappers, Thank you for all your work last week. I did not get to watch at all, but you all kept me in the loop and gave me some laughs.
Dear readers, I promise the quality will improve when this bleeping school year is finally over.

El Refrito

• Carmina and Paolo slime and slobber on each other.
• Toadhead blows a fuse about the contract.
• Lola is a mama bear. Elisa cries.
• Dam takes off his shirt. Ramona says stuff about friendship...but Dam is not wearing a shirt, so I don't pay attention.

Lo Nuevo 

• Padre Lupe visits Fina who is preoccupied by the Ingrid Conundrum. Padre notices, but Fina assures him that despite her preoccupation, she will soon have everything under control. She reveals nothing.
•  Ingrid has lost the check. Gabino barges in and is menacing and abusive. He wants to know why Fina has asked him to get rid of Ingrid. 
• Kenia has the check and considers it a lucky stroke that she’s known how to forge mom’s signature since she was a little girl. 
• Paolo and Carmina go at it. 
• Paloma is determined to win Gael. Ramona tells Paloma that her mother had gotten involved with an unsavory type and that Paloma was a product of that relationship. When Paloma asks who her father is, Ramona clams up. 
• Ingrid tells Gabino about her past affair with Rosendo and the child she had and abandoned. She lies and tells him she doesn't know who the child is, but that he's in La Ermita. She asks him to help her find her child. 
• Lucio is just sitting down to a sad lonely dinner when Elisa arrives with the waterworks. She explains about Toadhead's flipout over the contract. She cries and cries and cries and wants to know why she gets blamed for things she had nothing to do with. Why is she paying because of what her mom did? Lucio and Elisa both miss Blanca. 
• While out riding horsey near the casa azul, Damian flashes back to when he was a boy and saw Cheat-ho leaving. Coming back to the present, he sees Paolo leaving the casa azul. He rides up to the house and we get to see the same scene unfold again. 
• Gael visits Elisa but finds out that she left after Toadhead’s flip out. Gael goes to Don Lucio’s to look for Elisa. 
• Damian reminds Carmina about the time he was young and caught her leaving the house. Carmina says a whole lot of lines I don’t understand because she is channeling the spirit of William Levy. She’s trying to talk her way out of trouble since Dam Fine noticed the exit of one Paolo Landucci. She claims he’s all upset about Elisa saying he tried to rape her and that he (Paolo) really is in love with her. Dam calls BS since there really is no need for uber privacy for that kind of conversation. Carmina says she thought the same thing and that she told Paolo to leave Elisa alone. Her taxi arrives and she leaves. 
•  Lola thinks about the candle Ramona gave her and POOF! Horacio walks into the Castanon kitchen (Pop! Goes the Hottie.) He apologizes for not coming to visit and asks her out for next Sunday. He admits he’s dealing with some problems. He tells Lola she’s a great gal and he can’t believe she’s even noticed him. He doesn’t deserve her. Lola thinks that's her call. He asks what she'll decide. She tells him to get his problems fixed and then they can talk. 
• Lucio gives Elisa a picture of Blanca and Steffie together. Elisa loves it since she doesn’t have any pictures of her mother or Blanca. She and Lucio remind each other they are not alone. They have each other. 
• Ingrid flips out in the La Ermita Inn lobby. She’s trying to find out from the desk clerk where Kenia is. Gabino comes and asks her what’s up. She tells him she’s waiting on a letter from a family member. She’s hard up for cash and has to hide from Fina. Gabino says he’ll take care of her. 
• In Mexico City, Princess Poop whines about losing Dam Fine. She and Daddy talk about his money problems. Dad encourages her to go out with other muchachos. 
• In La Ermita, Sabrina is amazed that Enrique will continue to work at the Pro Ce. Enrique says he needs the cash so he can go find Princess Poop in the Big City. He wants Sabrina to get the number and address from Paolo.
• While Dr. Whipped reads about Drugs for the Heart (in English) Be-gone-ya screeches about Enrique's dumb asp and the problems it's causing her with Fina. Dr. Whipped can't believe she's more worried about her friendship with Fina than there marriage. He confesses to knocking boots with another woman. He won't tell her who. She's more worried about the scandal. Dr. Whipped starts packing.
• Dam Fine confronts Paolo about Elisa. Fina comes running when she hears the screaming. Dam wants Paolo gone...like yesterday. Fina refuses.
• Toadhead fantasizes about Kenia. Creepy.as.hell. Carmina comes home and claims she went to the clinice. Toadhead tells her about the contract Dam offered Elisa. This leads to a very odd request for nookie on Toadhead's part. Carmina shuts him down.
• Gael finds Elisa at Lucio's. He tells her he's the one who blabbed about the contract. Fuss. Fuss. Fuss. Gael doesn't want Elisa to have anything to do with Dam Fine.
• Be-gone-ya tries to block Dr. Whipped from leaving. The kids come running and Enrique tells mom she can't force dad to stay. Dr. Whipped leaves
• Carmina calls Fina to tell her about the contract and hangs up on her.
• Tonia swears the woman who just called is the same who called Paolo.
• Toadhead visits Lucio and asks him to talk Elisa out of working her mother's lands. Lucio tells him to support the girl and let her at least try. Toadhead says Dam and Elisa can't fall in love. Toadhead tells Lucio about the (false) paternity test results.
• Dam enters the foyer just as Gael is hugging Elisa goodbye. He wants to talk to Elisa in private. Dam demands Elisa decide Gael or him! The boys gang up on her and Elisa tells them both to go to hell. Go girl!
• Dam and Gael both swear to win Elisa.
• Lucio thinks the test must be wrong and he says "no puede ser." 
• Kenia calls a friend to help get the check deposited without it being traced to her?
• Ingrid curses Kenia and her stealing butt.
• Be-gone-ya tells the kids about Dr. Whipped cheating on her. Sabrina haz a sad. Enrique advises they hear Dad's side, too. Oh, and btw way, sis...are you still going to get Flor's info from Paolo?
• Kenia, Toadhead, Cantina???
• Gael reports the Dam scene to Padre Lupe. Padre feels like it's Rosendo and Augusto all over again. The two men both  fought for Steffie, but Steffie chose Augusto. Eventually they did become friends. Gael doesn't think two men who fight for one woman can ever become friends.

Labels: abismo

She's delirious. I assure you this is how she is. M. Hercule Poirot

Last time on El Talisman:

Lucas has come to see Doris. He tells her he likes her and will tell her all of Pigorio's secrets.

Today on El Talisman:

Alberta brings Pigorio some tea. He tells her he feels really bad but hopefully tomorrow he will feel better. He wants to know if Alberta has heard if Mariana has gotten her memory back. Alberta crosses herself and says she hopes so.

Beltbuckle and Lucrazy are still arguing about Cameela and Pedro. He keeps telling her to Largate and Callate. She says it isn't her fault that Pedro loves Cameela and that they are together. He calls her estupida, he calls Pedro an indio, again! He slaps her so hard, she falls down and is knocked out, with blood coming from her nose.

Mariana, Cameela and Pedro are still together. She thanks the both of them for telling her about the check. Padre calls Pedro on his cell looking for the papers from the orphanage I think. Pedro tells him to get Margarito to help him. He tells the Padre he'll see him tomorrow. After he gets off the phone, he tells Mariana they are going, but she asks to speak to Cameela alone for a moment. Pedro goes and waits in the hall. Mariana tells Cameela she can see how much her and Pedro love each other and that she won't stand in their way. Cameela tells her she was jealous of Mariana, but Mariana says don't worry. I am more like his sister now. Pedro comes back and Mariana says she is happy for them both. She understands that Pedro doesn't love her that way. Pedro tells her they will have to get a lawyer to sue for custody of Santiago. Mariana says the divorce will go thru quickly. He will keep Mariana posted on what happens with Santiago. Pedro says he is glad he has his "sister" back. They leave.

Maria has come back into the office to put her wallet back into her purse, and of course doesn't notice her keys are missing. (Note to Maria-please get a lock for that purse or the Doc will keep going thru it, jus' sayin' who knows what he will jack next). He wants to go out somewhere with her. She says she can't do that, and he knows it. He wants her to wait. He tells her their love is sooo not over (Note to Doc Manuel-please dude, get her some flowers, roses are nice, chocolates ya know the Belgian kind make them dark, take her to her favorite museum, concert, get my drift?). She leaves, while smiling really big (Note to Maria: you sure are giving him lots of signals there). He still has her keys of course, little does she know. He decides to leave too, cause here is his golden opportunity. Maria is in the parking lot looking for her keys. Manuel asks if everything is ok? She tells him she can't find her keys. He says with a purse as big as that, no wonder you can't find them. He offers her a ride home so she won't have to get a taxi. She says Angel is probably waiting for her,and Mariana must be waiting for him. He calls Mariana he won't be home right way, he is escorting a very beautiful woman home. Manuel says he wants another chance with Maria, yet again, (listen dude see advice I gave you above). She tells him, you know I can't and why, but she is smiling. She tells him Mariana is waiting for him. They go.

Lucrazy is still knocked out. Beltbuckle is trying to revive her but isn't having too much luck,so what does he do, wait for it, pours tequila down her throat. (Note to Beltbuckle: Man up and call an EMT, with the smell of alcohol they will think she fell). When he can't revive her he tells her this is all Pedro's fault. He keeps calling her name. He keeps saying it can't be. Tonio leaves the room. He goes to the small office takes off his shirt, changes into another one, and grabs the gun Val stole from Pedro.

Cut to the Gasbag, er El Viral who is having *another* pity party for one. She wants to know why she can't be happy? Why noone loves her? (Get a clue ya Gasbag, you are toxic, that's why. Get a job already and stop living off your poor daughter, your son, and most of all your sister, jus' sayin').

Tonio has dragged Lucrazy all the way to El Talisman. He leaves her on the ground, goes a short distance and fires the gun in the air. Pedro and Cameela hear it and wonder what the hey is going on? Pedro wants to go outside to investigate, Cami wants to come with, but he tells her to stay. Sarita, Gabe, Margarito and Domitilla all come in the room to to find out what is going on. Pedro and Margarito decide to investigate. Sarita says it is probably Lucrazy. Tonio is outside kissing Lucrazy on the cheek and crying. He tells her this is all Pedro's fault. Gabe, Sarita, Cami are worried Pedro hasn't come back yet. Sarita says she is very nervous.Margarito and Pedro have made it outside and Beltbuckle hides in the bushes. Pedro and Margarito find Lucrazy. Pedro checks her pulse and she slowly wakes up. She tells him her head hurts. Pedro is attempting to carry her, she asks her if that gun is his? Meanwhile Beltbuckle makes his escape and hides by the barn building. He is still crying. All in the house are very worried. Margarito tells them everything is ok. They found Lucrazy and Sarita says Lucrazy probably shot the gun again. Pedro has taken Lucrazy to the nearest building, which looks like a barn to me.

Lucrazy is starting to get some of her senses back. Pedro asks her why is she trying to always ruin his happiness? She tells him she loves him. Pedro tells the delirious woman (See M. Hercule Poirot's quote above) why did you try to kill me with a gun? Lucrazy tells him she doesn't want to be there, and she doesn't want to fight with him. Pedro says he will help her, but she has to leave El Talisman. She starts screaming like a banshee when he mentions Cameela's name. She doesn't want to hear about her, takes the Coleman lamp on the ground, smashes it, causes huge flames and tells Pedro if doesn't want her, they will die together right here. Tonio is outside this building the whole time, crying. (Note to Beltbuckle: Man up Dude, who knew you were such a wuss? Get the girl some help, put her in the manicomio, where she will be protected from your skanky ass, and maybe she can be normal after lots of help from the docs. Jus' sayin')

Army and Angel are on their way to the movies, when Fabi shows up. She tells Army she has escaped Alcatrash and wants to be with him. He tells her he isn't equipped to help her right now. No, money and living with the Gasbag, er his mother, Tia, Angel and Cameela. She begs and pleads but Army tells her she needs to go back to Alcatrash. She tells him what her Dad did to her and why she is looking for his help and she loves him. Of course guess who interrrupts this convo? Anyone? Wait for it, The Gasbag of course who insults Fabi YET AGAIN. The Gas needed to be vented, I guess. (Note to El Viral- GO to the nearest 7-11 and get that GAS-X Already!!!!!) Army tells her to shut it, and she whines and says, are you ready for this, I'm yo Mama. Angel hustles her back in the apartment and Army and Fabi finally have some alone time. Army tells Fabi he wishes he had a place for her to stay, but in a little while he will. He tells her to be calm and go back and as soon as he can, he will come get her and they can be together. He tells her not to provoke her Daddio and to be calm and do what he says until he can come get her.

Everybody at El Tal wants to go outside to find Pedro. Padre comes down from upstairs and notices the fire. He wants to know where Pedro is? Tonio is still standing by the barn, doing nothing.

Pedro tries to save Lucrazy, but she is laughing and howling and wants to die with him. The Beltbuckle finally moves his butt comes into the burning barn, finds Pedro and knocks the crap out of him. Beltbuckle saves Lucrazy and leaves Pedro on the burning floor. After Tonio gets Lucrazy outside he slaps her and tells her to Callate, she screams and he puts a hand over her mouth.

Everyone from El Tal runs outside. Margarito and Gabe go into the burning barn and rescue Pedro. Someone has called the Fire Department and the Police. Pedro wants to know where Lucrazy is? Noone knows.

Meanwhile Beltbuckle is telling Lucrazy to shut it and to say nothink. (Sgt. Schultz, couldn't help it), So Tonio goes screaming for Lucrazy. El Capitan is there with his some of his policeman as is the fire department. Pedro is screaming that Lucrazy caused this and Beltbuckle is like so not, El Capitan has to keep them apart. Beltbuckle tells El Capitan that Pedro probably did this. Pedro tells El Capitan that Lucrazy came to El Tal with a gun again, everyone in the house heard the shot. He reminds El Capitan that Lucrazy tried to kill him (Note to Pedro: Should have gone to El Capitan and pressed those charges while you had the chance.). Beltbuckle tells El Capitan that Pedro probably tried to kill Lucrazy by setting the fire and oh, by the way where is she? Beltbuckle says obvio she is still in the barn. Pedro says he tried to get her out, but then he got knocked out. He asks Beltbuckle how he knew Lucrazy was in there with a pistol? He says he was looking for her. He claims Pedro let her die in the blazing inferno. El Capitan tells Pedro, under the circumstances I will have to, wait for it, arrest you. (Note to El Capitan: Now look I know you are the hardest working cop in Fresno, but COME ON, you should know better, especially since this a Negrete, there is no body yet, so you should have waited, jus' sayin'). So poor Pedro is going to be hauled off to the Only Jail in Fresno. Cameela and all the El Tal inhabitants try to tell El Capitan that Beltbuckle is lying, but it is like talk to the hand, the ears aren't listening. Before they pull away, Padre tells El Capitan, this is an injustice and that Pedro is innocent. El Capitan says they will investigate of course, but he has to go to the hoosegow now. El Capitan puts him in the cell, and Pedro tells him you know damn well I am innocent. El Capitan tells him, that in his gut, he knows he is probably right, but for now he has to stay in jail.

Panchito went to M. Brigette to get Doris, on the Pig's orders. M. Brigette tells him she isn't there, but he tells her he knows she is there. Lucas has left, and M Brigette takes Panchito to see Doris. He tells her the Pig is doing badly and to please come back to Alcatrash. After some hemming and hawing, she goes. She goes into Pig's room and tells Panchito she is in charge now and to go. She sits on the Pig's bed and he wakes up with a start. He says oh, my children and you are against me. She assures him she is not against him, and only wants to marry him. He says he has to battle his two kids to get Alcatrash ES MIO back from them. Doris says what about marrying me? She is kissing him as she asks this. He says one day, maybe.

Angel has driven Fabi and Army to Alcatrash. Army assures her, he will come for her as soon as he has enough dinero and a place, he swears he will come for her even if she is in China. Army and Fabi are in the back seat and kissing and swearing undying eternal love. Angel tells them he hates to break up this romantic mood, but please hurry up, before someone from Alcatrash comes out. They say their goodbyes and they leave her there.

After Pedro is arrested, Beltbuckle goes back to where he left Lucrazy and asks her if she got all that. Beltbuckle thinks he has won this one, and tells Lucrazy they (the popo) think that Pedro did her in. He says Pedro is goin' to jail. Lucrazy says better in jail than with that bruja. He tells her let's go. The go back to Alcatrash and Beltbuckle hustles her back into the study. He leaves and runs into Fabi and wants to know where the hell she has been? He is grabbing her arm in a death grip and she is terrified. (Note to Belbuckle: Hell is toooo good for you, jus' sayin').

Now finally El Viral, er the Gasbag, as her pity party for one continues, she thought bubbles, Why does my daughter Cameela hate me so, Why doesn't my son Army want to be with me? (See M. Hercule Poirot's quote above). I am soo alone, boo hoo, I don't want to be alone. (Note to the Gasbag: Please take the great Greta Garbo's advice (I vant to be alone!!!!!). Anyhoo, she says, wait for it, I will get Manuel back. Oh, yeah that is SO NOT GONNA HAPPEN.

Tomorrow on El Talisman:

Beltbuckle tells Pigorio I want ALL of Alcatrash!

*Tomorrow we have joining us a new recapper, Rosemary la Otra, who will be doing regular Tuesday recaps, and on Friday, we have the return of our Intrepid Reporter, Ms Anita who will be doing the Friday recaps. *

Labels: Talisman

　

Has life been unfair to you Mademoiselle? You've met my Mother- M. Hercule Poirot.

Today on El Talisman:

Pigorio in pj's is in his room talking to Lucrazy. He asks her if he can have her part of Alcatrash, so sorry Daddy already gave it to Tonio. She feels the ranch isn't important, he is really mad and tells her the only thing she cares about is Pedro, it is a sickness and obsession for her. He tells her Pedro only loves Cameela. She is pithed.

Pedro goes to see Santiago again and promises him, he will get him out of there, but it takes time, and he makes Santiago promise he won't run away and stay put, until this mess is straightened out.

Tracy and Alberta are in the kitchen,serving Papa Beltbuckle, Flor and Fabi dinner. Tonio asks the girls what they talked to their Mama Doris about? They want to know why he is digging for info? Flor stands up and yells at him that Cameela is way more important to him, and he doesn't care for his own girls. So of course being the Jackwagon that Tonio is asks them if his happiness counts for nothing? Fabi is standing up too and reminds him according to Army, Cameela is marrying Pedro, and only Pedro. Tonio backhands her. (I was hoping that Tracy would pick up the black iron skillet and whack him one). Flor gets in Tonio's face (you go girl) and asks him why he hit Fabi? He grabs them both and asks if they understand he is marrying Cameela, si or no? They just look at him, he lets them go and leaves. Alberta and Tracy are muy impactada. When Tonio goes into the hallway, he says to himself maldito indio, its all your fault Cameela doesn't love me. (Get a clue Beltbuckle never gonna happen.). Tonio also thinks his daughters may be right.

Pedro is in bed thinking about Santiago, as is Cameela in her own bed thinking of Santiago. They both can't sleep. Both are praying for Santiago. Cameela comes to Pedro's room and locks the door and he asks if she is ok? She says she can't sleep and climbs into bed with him. They are just about to get en flagrante, when Pedro gets a call, wait for it, en flagrante interruptus. It is Mariana wanting to meet him and tell him about some woman that came for, on the count of three, MI CHEQUE! She wants to meet now, they want to wait till tomorrow, but when Cameela hears about the cheque she knows who it was. Pedro agrees to come see Mariana now, and tells her, he is bringing Cameela. See M. Hercule Poirot's quote above.

Madame Gasbag, aka, El Viral has come home in a bad mood from her attempt to collect, MI CHEQUE, from Mariana. Army and Angel are there, and she says nothing is good, everything is bad, blah blah. Army wants to know what she is blithering about, she tells him to have some consideration it's all about her, the universe revolves around her, don't cha know. Army tells her to get over herself to stop the drama and the chantaje (Thanks Blue Lass) and to just get over herself. She turns it back on him and says all his universe involves is Fabi. She isn't even decent, well Army gets right in her face and tells her she isn't so decent either, it was HER plan to seduce Fabi and blackmail her for money and didn't she do the same for money with The Pig? Well the gas has built up in her brain and, wait for it, THAR SHE BLOWS AGAIN, and she slaps Army. He tells her Fabi is a decent girl, and here we go again with the Gasbag's threats, One day you will regret it. (Note to El Viral: Go to Tia Maria and get some pills for that constant ache in your head, like GAS-X know what I'm sayin'). She leaves the room and Army tells Angel he needs to find a job and get out of this apt, he can't live with The Gasbag anymore. She doesn't support anything he does and besides El Viral doesn't likeFabi, and neither does Fabi's family. He tells Angel he needs to find a place so he and Fabi can live together. Angel reminds him her family won't like that, but Army doesn't care. He tells Army to relax. The Gasbag has come back and the boys have had enough, and before she blows again, they want to go. She tells them thanks for inviting me to go with you. They leave. (Seriously, ya Gasbag, after the way you insulted your son, your nephew and the way you are with your family, You move out. Just sayin' I hear M. Brigette has an opening. Lots of money there, jus' sayin')

Fabi, Flor and Alberta are in the girls room and Fabi says she has had enough, her Beltbuckle Papa cannot treat her like this anymore and she is going to escape with Army. She really wanted to live with Mama Doris, but both Fabi and Flor suspect she is living with a lover and that's why they can't live with her. Flor wants to know if she is going to live at the university, but Fabi says no, with Army. Flor is sooo not down with this and says she will bear the brunt of anger from Papa Beltbuckle is Fabi leaves. Alberta is worried if Beltbuckle finds out Fabi escaped with Army he will kill him. Fabi tells Flor she will always have Tracy and Alberta to look after her. Flor is not happy. (Note to Fabi: Don't leave your poor sister there, take her with you and don't look back.). Alberta wanted Fabi to wait and think about what she is doing, tomorrow is another day and things will seem different. Fabi says no, they will never change.

Panchito and Tracy are in the kitchen and she tells him what Beltbuckle did. Panchito calls him an animal and he is telling Papa Pig about this.

Pedro and Cameela are at Mariana's apt and she says this Gasbag, er, El Viral was making her nervous. Do they know who she is? Cameela tells her its her Mother, (See M. Hercule Poirot's quote above). Why is this woman looking for money from me. Cameela apologizes for the Gasbag, er, El Viral and Pedro tells her it is a long story. Cameela and Pedro both tell her about Don Bernardo selling El Tal to Estagone, how Estagone lost it in a poker game with the Pig, how Pedro won it back, how Estagone killed himself, and how the CHEQUE was to save Cameela's family from the street. Cameela tells Mariana she didn't know Pedro had done this. Pedro explains that the check surfaced years later, when the Gasbags, non-millonaire husband attempted to cash it. Pedro tells her it is her money and not necessary to give any to the Gasbag. Now that Mariana know the whole story she feels better. They tell her they are worried about Santiago, and she knows who he is. They want to get married as soon as possible to adopt him. Pedro asks Mariana if she trusts him now? She says she does and feels so much better.

Panchito visits Pigorio and takes his blood pressure. It's not that good. Panchito says he is very strong, but Pigorio says he will be dead soon. Panchito pooh, poohs this and tells him all he needs is rest and he will stay with him tonight, and if he needs anything Panchito will be right there. (Note to Panchito, your Pig of a father so doesn't deserve you, you are WAY too good for him). Of course Pigorio tells Panchito the only thing I need is Doris, oh where o where has my little Doris gone, oh , where oh where can she be? Pigorio calls her maltida Doris again and she better not be working at M. Brigette's or he will kill her. Doris is, wait for it, ES MIO. Pigorio tells Panchito that Lucrazy gave her part of Alcatrash to her Beltbuckle brother. Panchito leaves and Pigorio goes to sleep. He is tossing and turning and wakes up screaming Doris' name.

Doris is with M. Brigette again and tells her she will only go back to Alcatrash if Pigorio honors her ultimatum of marrying him. She thanks Brigette for letting her stay with her. And Brigette tells her to go to her room and stay out of sight. Doris goes upstairs and Lucy is there. She tells Doris the joint is hoppin' tonight and there are lots of clients.

Lucrazy is in the kitchen and asks Tracy if she thinks her Beltbuckle brother loves her? Tracy she runs at the mouth and says nah, Then she apologizes to Lucrazy and Lucrazy says you're right.

Val comes in and asks Tonio if he is ok? The Beltbuckle tells him I don't need your opinion, and wait for it, LARGATE and Callate. Valentin leaves and Lucrazy comes in and tells him she was his accomplice at getting half of Alcatrash. She reminds him Cameela is in love with Pedro and his fantasy is not gonna happen. Beltbuckle tells her Cameela will be Senora Antonio Negrete, for better or worse. (Dream on there Beltbuckle). Lucrazy and Tonio start to argue and hiss at each other. Beltbuckle calls her loca, and she says Estupida Cameela, I'll kill her. Beltbuckle says if you kill her, I'll kill you. You'll be dead. She reminds him that estupida is with Pedro and in love with him, and that is why Cameela must die. Cause then Pedro will be free don't cha know. He tells Lucrazy to Callate. Lucrazy says Pedro and Cameela have to be seperated, (yeah like that is gonna happen). She accuses him of fooling her into giving him her quarter of Alcatrash. She tells him he is stupid and all he ever talks about is Cameela, he grabs her and twists her hair. She tells her Beltbuckle brother that Cameela hates him. He lets her go.

Valentin and Panchito are in the hallway hearing all this fighting. One of them says that Lucrazy is hysterical, ya think, and has many illusions, I'll say. Panchito says he won't say anything and he doesn't care if they kill each other.

Manuel is in the office and Maria comes in, she hopes she isn't interrupting anything, but she needs her wallet. He says come on in, I'm not busy. She goes and gets her wallet from her purse and leaves. Now he goes over and, wait for it, snoops in her purse. (NEVER, EVER snoop in a ladies' purse, personally I think Maria should have put a mouse trap in there, just sayin'). He extracts her keys from the purse and puts them in his pocket, what have you got planned there Doc? And what is with his hair? It is looking mussed and tossled. Maybe new hair product, jus' sayin'.

M. Brigette is greeting johns, er um , clients and in walks, wait for it, Lucas the bomber. It's a miracle your here. He says he is looking for a diverson,and she offers him Suzette, who he likes, but doesn't want. He wants Doris. She tells him Doris isn't available. He reminds her he is an investigator for the Pig. She says oh, yeah I know, you are not only his investigator, but a fake notary and a killer. She tells him Doris is not available to him and he says he needs a diverson and if she knows what's good for her, she better send him to Doris. M. Brigette does. He goes into Doris' room and of course she asks him "Que Haces Aqui", he says he likes her and works for Pig. She is Pigorio's favorite woman. She asks Lucas if Pigorio is looking for her? He tells her if she does him , he'll tell her and also all of Pigorio's secret.

There were two scenes of Padre with Gabe and Sarita with Domitilla, each perturbed at the other. Sarita says if Gabe won't marry her, she may as well be a nun. Gabe tells Padre he loves Sarita, but is so not ready to marry her.

Lunes on El Talisman:

Pedro and Lucrazy are in a barn and Lucrazy sets it on fire and says they will both die.

Labels: Talisman