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Lower your expectations m'dears. It's late and I didn't give a box of bayou beans about most of the story lines tonight.

El Refrito

• Rohell has a fit and takes it out on his wedding pictre.

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I missed the first bit of the show. By the time I got the machine working, Enzo was trying to get Vince to tell a secret. Vince sympathetically (!) notes, "you're really broken up about Chela."

Vince tells Enzo that Pancho is Fer's son. And that he falsified the DNA results. "Actually I didn't do it, I paid a tech to do it. Now you see why I need your - discretion." If Pancho is Fer's son, he will inherit her Avon holdings.

Enzo's stunned by Vince's bold skulduggery. "What if your aunt finds out?" "How can she? The tech is now living happily in Australia with koalas and kangaroos. But the worst of it is, Pancho and I are cousins!" Enzo laughs. Luckily Candy is not really Pancho's brother or Vince would be in love with his first cousin. But Ana and Freddie -- are they cousins for real?

Speaking of the King of Rome, Freddy is beaming at Ana at the Lopez dinner table. A big pink box is carried in; Ana lifts the box and there's a cake under it, and on the cake is her new cd called "Una Familia Con Suerte," with pictures of: Laura, Pancho, I dunno who, Rebe, Chela, Pepe and Moni, Sandrucha, Candy with somebody behind her I can't recognize, and Ana. I would have thought her BAND members would get on the cover not her random family members. But I don't make the news, I just report it. Freddy is proud of Ana, she is looking forward to touring and press coverage etc. Candy decides to help out and appoints herself manager and representative of Ana Lopez.

Tomas is in jail thinking his sister killed Dud. Elena has - wait for it - AMNESIA! She is calling Tomas but he can't answer - because he's in jail, duh.

Chela admits to Pancho she liked kissing him.

Fer's doctor must have proposed to her and she must not have said yes (yet). Lupe tells the doc there seems to be a cloud of love around them. "I adore Fer, I've loved her for years," he says - and for once somebody overhears something to their advantage! Fer creeps in and tells the doc she loves him too.

Rebe is not enjoying dinner with Mike and is drinking a lot of Tequila. She's pissed thinking Pancho is lovin' Chela (must have seen them kissing). Rebe drinks more tequila. "Remember our first kiss, at the beach," Mike mutters revoltingly. He makes Rebe close her eyes. "Remember the sun, the ocean, our love..."

He closes in with his pink lipstick and she doesn't pull away, but she doesn't reciprocate with enthusiasm. Yuk, he's a terrible kisser! Somebody hiding behind a handy column is taking pictures.

Finally Rebe recoils and says, "Wouldn't you have preferred kissing a corpse? With this, you've killed the memory of our first kiss. I'm angry and confused and I don't want to be here." She stalks out. Mike calls his assistant Lidia Hot Pants and she joins him at the restaurant. When he tells her he kissed Rebe, she gets mad, says she's jealous, and leaves.

Pancho is staggering around disturbed by Chela's love.

Vince asks Enzo to put the love-nest apartment in Candy's name, because she wants it that way. Enzo gives him 'egg eyes.'

Arnold can't get in touch with Pina in Brussels, he's worried about her. He notices Rebeca is in the dumps. "A few days ago I was excited about marrying Pancho, now I want to forget him."

In the meeting, Enzo tells Pancho he broke up with Chela. They're very chummy now that they got blotto together. Rebe comes in and won't look up.

Tomas is let out of his cell and taken to a guy in charge who points out Tomas was caught with a bloody towel, cleaning some murder weapon (boy, this is all new to me, I haven't watched since last Wednesday). I guess Tomas thinks his sister (an amnesiac, remember...) killed the Dud: Tomas therefore "admits" he killed the guy (to save his sister from hanging for it).

The Avon and Belle Face meeting is no laugh riot. Everybody is formal and nobody looks up. The real value of Belle Face has been established. Vince says Pina can't be at the meeting. Mike admits (I'm not sure why) that he committed fraud in the past and let Rebe take the blame; he praises her and says she is honest etc. Vince complains it isn't relevant.

Vince and Pancho shout childishly at each other in the meeting. Arnold tells everybody to breathe deeply and relax.

Elsewhere, Lupita has evil foreboding while, in prison, Tomas signs his confession and cries.

Rebe coldly informs Chela: "Now you have a clear field to get what you've always wanted." But on her way in to see Pancho, Chela runs into Enzo; he drops his papers, their hands touch, they have a long moment nose to nose. And, I am thrilled to see, the episode ends, it's just one hour tonight! Hurrah!

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LQNPA, Cap 45, Feb 28, 2012: Ugly Crying, Self-Pity, and Rigid Self-Righteousness

While the recap is being cooked up, I'd like us to discuss UGLY CRYING among galanes in telenovelas. I'm of the opinion that Cesar Evora is the ugliest crier in all of Telenovelaland. (I base this on his red-nosed, red-eyed, squished-face, totally-getting-into-it crying in Llena de Amor.) But I find that Jorge Salinas is a close second. For example:

Okay, he's mercifully hiding his UGLY CRYING from us in this shot. Let's try again:

That's more like it . . .

A final example . . .

And some not-so-ugly crying. (Aw, Rogelio, Rogelio!)

Jorge Salinas can also do "Pretty Crying" (as witnessed earlier in this novela) and galanes like Jose Ron and Guy Ecker are also "Pretty Criers." This is no reflection on the acting ability of any of these guys; it's just an observation.

NOW ONTO THE RECAP FOR EPISODE 45:

(NOTE: Events may not be listed in complete order, but you should be able to figure out what belongs where!)

* We have a repeat of Rohellio's ugly crying from last night. He is talking big talk about how he'll just get over all of this, and he'll never love again, blah blah blah, but Maria says, nothing doing, you have Cupcake in your heart. Rohell breaks down and admits it, and through sobs, says, "But she loves another." Maria rests her head on his lap to comfort him, as he wipes away his tears, thoroughly shattered.

* Cupcake finds Fermin at Boring del Cielo and he is welcoming and friendly. They chat and she tells him that the Guscake is not believing that she's not a gold-digging bruja. "I tried to tell him, but he won't listen." (Sort of how she wouldn't listen to Rohell! But no, she won't make that connection.)

Cupcake and Margarito meet up with a friendly Fermin.

* Fed is at the Hacienda, not-so-subtly pumping everyone for info on Cupcake. He uses the somewhat strained excuse that since Cupcake is a friend of his former employee, Dani, and because Cupcake is a "buena muchacha," that he's worried. When he talks to Maria, she won't say much, only that Cupcake is very young, and she couldn't handle stuff. And that she took Margarito with her.

* Cupcake is directed to some bungalows (sounds like a motel?) where she and Margarito can stay. Fermin also tells her that Guscake is staying with him. Cupcake wants an opportunity to talk with the Guscake some more. Fermin says that Guscake took her so-called "betrayal" really hard.

* Carmen is asking Guscake about the return of Cupcake. No, he won't take her back, but the feelings of love are still there. "Why did she return if she's with this other guy?" Carmen asks. "I don't know, I didn't ask." (Well maybe you SHOULD, idiot!) He engages in some Pretty Crying as he says he's confused, blah blah blah.

Gus makes sure Carmen knows that he's still got a thing for the Cupcake.

A classic example of Pretty Crying.

* Consuelo and Maripaz are talking about their respective loser would-be or ex-novios, Miguel and Efrain. FF>>

* Miguel is put to work in the Hacienda, while Rohell looks on and chats. They're at a steep staircase, which Rohell says is his most hated part of the Hacienda, because it reminds him that he can't walk. Rohell then wallows in self-pity. He thinks that Cupcake used the "you murdered my novio" thing as an excuse to bail on his crippled self, because after all, what woman would want to be saddled with him. (Well at the moment that's true, but it's not because of your chair, but because of your thoroughly ROTTEN personality, dude!) Miguel tries to affirm that Cupcake was, indeed, very sincere, but Rohell isn't buying it. He then muses if perhaps he was destined to be alone, even if he could walk.

Rohell talks with Miguel, as we get a good view of Miguel's saggy britches.

* Fermin deposits Cupcake and Margarito at a bungalow. She thanks him and then asks about getting work in town. Fermin thinks he may be able to help. He seems very fond of her, thinks she's a great nurse, etc. She later tells Margarito that she plans on staying in Boring del Cielo, despite Guscake being mad at her, and that eventually she'll make him listen to the full details of her situation!

* That night, Fermin advises Guscake to stop being such a rigid, self-righteous pr*ck and actually listen to the Cupcake. (Of course he says it much nicer than that.) Later, Carmen advises him to seek out Cupcake, telling him that since he loves her, he should fight for that love.

* Back at the Hacienda, Miguel is having a chat with Consuelo, and she's telling him that Maripaz still cares for him. FF>> Miguel whines about being locked up like an animal. He sends Consuelo to get him coffee, and when her back is turned, he swipes some liquor and leaves, presumably to further embrace his drunken lifestyle.

* In the morning, Rohell goes to Miguel's room, where Miguel is sleeping off an evening of dedicated drinking. Rohell relishes dumping a pitcher of water on Miguel, and proceeds to chastise and admonish him, and tells him to suck it up and stop acting like a loserific drunkard. He reminds Miguel that he got him out of jail. Miguel, still staggeringly drunk, lunges on Rohell in a display of intoxicated gratitude, while Rohell recoils from (I assume) Miguel's less-than-fresh breath. Rohell tells Miguel that he needs to take this opportunity that life is giving him and not screw it up. He then instructs Hugo to keep an eye on Miguel.

Rohell doesn't need to get any nearer to Miguel to smell him, I'm thinking.

* Vainessa and David are talking business. David owns those lands at Boring del Cielo and Rohell is interested in buying. Vainessa tells him that if it'll annoy Rohell, she'd be willing to buy these lands herself. Smug smiles from both David and Vainessa.

* Fed calls Tia MentiRosa. It's confirmed that Cupcake left the Hacienda. Tia turns on the waterworks and hits Fed up for money, for helping the Cupcake, of course. He says he'll see what he can do, keep in touch, etc. Then Tia leaves a message with Bruno, and is seriously peeved over his douchebaggery in making it look like Rohell killed the Guscake.

* Bruno visits Tia MentiRosa. She is very peeved and is screaming and hitting him. He restrains her and with bug-eyed freakiness, lays out his plan. He needs Cupcake to return to the Hacienda and stay married to Rohell. Then he can work on Cupcake to get her to hate Rohell enough to hatch a "revenge" plot for the so-called murder of her novio. The plan involves bilking Rohell for his entire fortune, as well as Sinthia's half, if they can! AND . . . (Bruno says, twirling his evil villain mustache) he wants Cupcake for himself at the end.

Two greedy villains squabble.

* An interesting conversation between Bruno and Tia. They are peas in a pod. He wants money because he had it and lost it; she wants money because she's never had it. He admonishes her for "betraying" him by pushing Cupcake to marry Rohell, and says that the perks she gets now from Rohell (the house, the income) are "charity." They could be taken away at any time. He has something better planned!

* All of this evil plotting also requires that they do away with the Guscake, so Cupcake never finds out he didn't get murdered. (Too late for that, Bruno!) Tia is not all that keen on the killing part, but in the end, you know, whatever.

Bruno gets all bug-eyed and freaky. He explains that he had to set up Rohell so Cupcake would hate him, because she was starting to fall for Rohell and that couldn't be allowed.

* Bruno and Tia plot to get Cupcake staying with Tia, where she can work on Cupcake and have her know that she has Tia's "support."

* Guscake visits Cupcake, but in the end, won't budge. More self-righteous rigidness. "Talk to the hand!" he says, as she pleads and pleads and tries to get him to understand that she went with the rich dude because she THOUGHT GUSCAKE WAS DEAD, as in dead, deceased, assumed room temperature, no longer breathing oxygen, and so forth. But Guscake still won't listen, still won't be reasoned with, and plays the aggrieved and wronged boyfriend.

Oh he with the beautiful eyelashes visits Cupcake to further discuss things.

She tries to explain, but as usual, he won't listen.

* During  this frustrating conversation with the Guscake, it comes out that Tia knew that Guscake was alive and didn't say anything to the Cupcake. Cupcake looks impactada.

* Guscake absolutely flips when he finds out that the Cupcake is married. He accuses her of not mourning for him very long and can't believe she'd be kissing him while married to (and sleeping with) her husband. Cupcake can't get a word in edgewise to explain the true nature of her marriage. This is the final straw for him—he tells her that she is dead to him.

Impactado Gus.

* Vainessa tells her dad, Fed, that she wants to buy the Boring del Cielo lands from David, just to p*ss off Rohell. Fed is worried that she's too caught up with revenge. "Aw dad, just let me do this one thing!" she whines. They agree to meet at Boca del Cielo and talk about it some more.

* Consuelo is still heartbroken that Efrain is in love with Sinthia and there won't be any wedding. She's asking Sin (who has come into the kitchen) to not hurt Efrain anymore. Maria comes in, and wants to know what's up. Conned won't tattle on the affair between Effer and Sin, but Maria is suspicious and asks Sin if there's anything between her and Effer. Sinthia, in true selfish coldness, laughs and denies it, says that it's not her fault if Effer is in love with a "Princess" like her, and (while shooting a look of contempt towards Consuelo), says that he should aim a little lower, like another peon. Man, she is one arrogant, cold bruja in this episode.

* To further convince Maria that she's in no way involved with that peon Effer, Sinthia tells Maria that the guy she's really interested in is Mersnotty's brother, Gus. Just then Mersnotty comes in and Sinthia introduces her to Maria.

* Guscake rants to Carmen that Cupcake is married but doesn't love her husband, and at the same time wants to re-hook up with him. He's even more convinced than ever that Cupcake is a heartless, man-eating gold-digger. Carmen offers herself to Guscake to help him get over his broken heart. They hug and Cupcake sees. She pouts prettily as he sees her looking at him and Carmen hug. After Cupcake rushes off, Guscake tells Carmen that she's a great girl, but there can't be anything between them just now.

* Bruno calls Rohell as Tia listens in on the conversation. Cupcake hasn't shown up at Tia's house in Tuxtla. Rohell reports that Miguel (the Weakest Link) has been found and is back at the Hacienda. (Tia is happy about this.) "He'll be here until Cupcake returns and asks for forgiveness" he says. Rohell tells Bruno to keep leaning on Dani to see if she knows anything and to keep looking and pushing. He also says to keep an eye on the Tia as well.

Bruno reports back to Rohell as Tia listens in.

Rohell tells Bruno to keep looking.

* Vainessa and Sinthia are having a visit. Vain wants Sin to come with her for that business thing at Boring del Cielo. Sinthia passes because David will be there too. Besides, she's hanging out with her new friend, Mersnotty. Vainessa curls her lip at Mersnotty, still resentful because Mersnotty supposedly had a thing with Esteban. (But you dumped Esteban, so why do you care, Vainessa? Was it that your vanity was wounded?) Vainessa says she also wants to try to work on her dad to convince him to give up looking for that so-called other daughter of his.

Sin shows off her fabulous washboard abs as Vainessa leaves the room.

* Fed comes into Rohell's office to say goodbye, as he's off to Boring del Cielo. He hopes for Cupcake's swift and safe return, and offers any help he can give. Rohell thanks him. In slinks Vainessa. She tells Rohell that she hopes his wife never returns, as Fed shakes his head slightly in disapproval. Rohell gives her a look of veiled disgust.

Not thrilled to see Vainessa.

* Carmen, Fermin's daughter-in-law, is jealous of how Guscake is still hooked on Cupcake. She's going to try to snag the Guscake for herself, because somehow it's "not fair" that Cupcake should have him, since she's an evil gold-digging married woman. Later in the episode, Carmen approaches Cupcake and implies that she and the Guscake have something going on, and that Cupcake should just back off. Indeed, Cupcake did see Gus and Carmen hugging earlier and Gus knew she saw and he didn't leave her with the impression that nothing was going on, so . . .

Carmen tries to drive Cupcake away by implying that Guscake is involved with her, Carmen.

* In the evening, Effer reports to Rohell that they have searched for Cupcake, but so far, nothing. Do they keep on looking? Rohell snaps his whip on his desk and says of course, keep on keep on keep on.

"Don't stop looking for her!" he barks at Effer.

* Cupcake is able to call Dani and tell her that the Guscake is alive and not murdered by that old turd Rohell. Though of course Rohell is still to blame for hiring a hit on the Guscake, Cupcake is convinced. (I wonder what Rohell would think if he knew that both Dani and Miguel were fully aware that Cupcake was alive and well, and they said nothing. Now of course we know why Dani and Miguel aren't telling, but at the same time, Rohell still has no idea if Cupcake is even alive, or if she has succumbed to the wild terrain she had to travel through to escape.)

* Fed is in Boring del Cielo (on business with Vainessa, etc) and encounters the Cupcake. She's freaking, worried that he'll tattle on her, but he assures her he won't. They agree to meet later so they can talk.

Fed promises to help Cupcake and they arrange to meet later. But she can't show her face right now, because Vainessa and David are also at Boring del Cielo.

* In the dark, depressing solitude of his office, Rohell muses over his and Cupcake's wedding photo. In a fit of anger he throws it against the wall and he vows that he will "make her pay!" Okay, whatever, dude, I don't believe you, but if it makes you feel better to say it, go ahead . . .

In the dark solitude of his office, he looks at the Ugly Necklace he gave her, as well as the supposedly dead novio's necklace, and broods.

He looks at their wedding photo and wonders where she is.

END OF EPISODE!

AVANCES:

Vainessa sees Paula and Margarito at the bungalows and promptly calls Sinthia and tells her.

Repeat of Rohell vowing that she'll "pay" and a shot of Cupcake and Guscake kissing.

From the avances: Vainessa smiles smugly when she spots Margarito and Cupcake.

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Enzo takes the news that Chela doesn't love him pretty well... they're both crying, but he just doesn't want her to stay away from what she wants (Pancho) on account of him. Kind of a damp rag, but sweet.

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Hi there.
I was not able to do the recap for last night. I'd forgotten to set the DVR, and I'd been away this weekend, so when I came home late, I realized what had happened but could no longer do anything about it. I apologize.

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