Sunday, June 10, 2007

Duelo June 8 - Alina is ALIVE

Don Loco has the gall to say to the judge that he sentenced him without any proof, just the testimony, and they were all lying. I love to see this after months of “this flimsy note with no names on it is all the proof I need.” Live by the sword, die by the sword, Don Loco. Too bad for you. Crazy chick doctor storms off in a huff, but Elias takes the time to savor the moment.

Somehow Emilioooo already knows what happened with Don Loco’s sentencing, back at his house, he tells Angel that DL will spend a long time in jail. Angel then tries to get Emiliooo to go to the boutique’s opening party that night, he has a surprise for him. Emiliooo agrees to go. Does Alina know yet that she is being used as a surprise? Angel also says his condition is finally getting better, and he met a girl. Smiles all around.

Crazy chick doctor goes to see Don Loco and sedate him. She is going to leave, but he asks her to stay. For some reason, well I guess because she’s crazy, she does. After DL passes out she starts kissing him, her face disappearing in DL’s moustache. GROSS. A nurse sticks her head in the room and sees what is going on, then wisely makes a quick retreat. I hope she’s going to get the boss and get La Doctora Loca fired.

Elias finds Alina and Rodrigo and delivers the news of Don Loco’s sentence. Soledad shows up too. Soledad and Alina both look like they don’t like what happened. Hey you couple of dumbasses – HE LOCKED YOU UP. He disowned you. He mentally abused you. He made you LIVE IN A CAVE. Don’t give me any of this false sentimental BS. Aaarrrghgghghg I just want to slap the both of them in the face.

Angel and Coral talk while Claudia sets things up in the background at Coral’s new store. They think that tonight is finally the time for Alina and Emiliooo to finally find each other again.

Elias tries to talk some sense into Alina and Soledad, more nicely than I did two paragraphs back. They talk themselves into believing DL got what he deserved. They still don’t look happy about it. HE LOCKED YOU UP AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO REMEMBERS THIS? He ran around town f%**%ing shooting everybody! He shot ‘oh my darling Emilioooo love of my life even though he’s an insufferable ass’ TWICE!!!! What more do you need? Aarrrgh again. Elias, please, at least give them a ‘que the hell?’ look. At least do that. Please. No, he’s too busy trying to figure out how to be just the right amount of sensitive so he can move in on Soledad. “So, uh, I hear your husband got locked up for 25 years, and he used to keep you locked up, so I’m thinking it’s probably over there, so what do you say?” And then she says something like “oh jeez Elias I just don’t know, blah blah blah I can never love again blah blah blah my love with him used to be so great blah blah blah.” Cripes I’m so aggravated I can’t even make fun of these people right. Showing pity for DL has NO place here.

Angel and Coral talk about Emiliooo, Alina, Thelma, etc. Angel decides that he’s had enough talk, he wants to go put the moves on Claudia. Coral encourages him. Nice boss, perhaps she’s remembering how it was at the meson, she thinks she’s the house madam and Claudia is one of her girls? In a few minutes she’ll tell Angel he owes her some money for any extra time in the champagne room.

SA tries to tell Thelma to give up on conquering Emilioooo. Thelma has gone back to tight jeans and shirts that show us her endowments. It’s a great look for her. She has on some shoes or boots with heels, so she struts rather than walks. It works. Anyway, she says again that Emiliooo will be at her side forever. For having the nerve to suggest divorcing Emilioooo, Thelma smacks SA across the face. She gets ready to throw SA out on the street when Emiliooo breaks it up and says that SA isn’t going anywhere, and he tells Thelma again that he wants a divorce, and that’s final.

At the hospital, whoever the sleazy guy is with Luba (the wrestling manager?) says he needs to register them at the hospital. Luba lies and says their names are something Lopez. The manager knows better, so he takes her aside and asks her why she is lying. At least he had the decency to take her aside, maybe he isn’t so sleazy after all. He just looks like it.

Alina, Soledad, and Elias get back to Coral’s living room, AKA the scene of the Maxkabob. Elias says he spoke with Dr. Love and Mariana is doing well, he knows where they are staying, let’s go see them! The all get up and leave.

Luba explains to the guy that she and Gaspar are wanted by the law, but it’s all a big mixup. He believes her and helps her.

Mariana and Malena talk about Mariana’s conversation with DL, Malena is mad that she spoke with him. Mariana is also part of Alina and Soledad’s bizarre cult of Don Loco apologists. WTF. People. WAKE UP. I can’t take it any more. Of all people, Malena is the one who has her head on straight here, she basically says she hopes DL rots in jail. Hell yeah Malena. I’m with you. For now, I won’t forget completely what a wet blanket you were for so long before. Anyway, there’s a knock at the door, reunion time, everyone is surprised to see Alina alive, but for some reason there isn’t a lot of discussion about her ‘death.’ “Oh you’re alive!” “Yes!” “Ok great!”

Thelma talks to little Gasparito and says she just needs to get Emiliooo to feel the old passion for her that he used to have, that’s how she’ll get him back. Well, for starters, she’s going to have to compete with Alina’s daily battles with her shirts, that’s not an easy fight. He has the choice between a super bitchy hot chick, and a really dumb hot chick. Cripes who do you pick there? I guess for him, he’ll pick the dumb one. I wouldn’t be able to handle it after a while, her believing everything anybody tells her, but for him I guess that’s perfect. On this show, Coral’s the one who really has it going on, but she has that ‘hung up on Emiliooo for waaaay too long’ mark against her. There isn’t really an admirable woman on this show, every hot woman is either evil or really dumb.

The reunion with Mariana continues. Mariana says DL told her Alina was dead, then says that she told DL the truth. Alina says what truth? Mariana admits that she was the woman of Jose Gomez and had a daughter with him. The note was from him to her. Soledad is super frame skipping slo-mo goofy sound effects impactada. Alina is slightly less impactada, she never believed that DL wasn’t her real father anyway. Or she’s not smart enough to put it all together that fast.

Another great Asi es la Vida commercial. Any guys watching this show, don’t fast forward through those commercials.

Mariana tells how she tried to kill herself, then says everything is her fault. Soledad says no, it’s all Alfonsina’s fault. She is the one who took the card to DL. She says DL didn’t believe her when she talked to him. Alina finally figures out that DL really is sick in the head. You think?

Thelma struts her fine self into Emiliooo’s office to talk to him. I understand why he doesn’t want any part of her and I agree with him, but she looks great. There is a saying, at least among men, that goes like this – “Just remember, no matter how hot she is, there is some guy somewhere RIGHT NOW who has absolutely had it with all of her shit.” For Thelma, this couldn’t be more true. Emiliooo looks like he’s made of plastic or wax or something, something isn’t right there. She says she’ll give him the divorce, and custody of his son, if he spends the night with her and makes her feel like he used to. She knows it will all be a lie but she wants a good memory of him.

The reunion group start to discuss if DL will try to escape when Malena, who has suddenly become the Ferro-Approved voice of reason, says enough about DL already, let’s change the subject. They all laugh and agree, like at the end of a sitcom – ha ha ha freeze frame. Yes, it looked like that because I paused the recording when they all laughed. Alina announces the opening of Soledad and Coral’s new shop, then bails to go see Rodrigo.

DL’s lawyer visits him. DL hopes the lawyer can help him. Then he starts to talk about escaping. Like we didn’t all see that one coming. He says he’ll see him in Veracruz.

Emiliooo accepts Thelma’s offer, just so he can end all this. Not tonight, he has something to do. Thelma wants to go with him. She sweet talks him and he agrees to let her go. He says she can go, but only if she keeps her promise and after that he never has to see her again. Jeez, and she still wants to try and keep this guy? After he says that? Her self-esteem must be about zero.

At the opening, Angel is chatting up Claudia, everybody is just hanging out and drinking champagne. Coral’s dress is cut down to her waist, she’s really showing what she’s got. Any side-cleavage fans should be happy here. Coral pulls Angel aside to worry about when Emiliooo comes, Angel tells her to chill.

At the hospital the doctor doesn’t have good news. Gaspar needs a kidney transplant. Luba sputters like a sneezing dog. That is her version of impactada I guess.

Emiliooo and Thelma arrive at the party, Soledad freaks out and she and Coral fuss and try and figure out what to do.

Alina greets Rodrigo in the living room of Coral’s house, they leave. As soon as they leave, the phone starts ringing. The ladies trying to call her off, no doubt.

Gasca screams for help, he’s all tied up. Alfonsina points a gun at him and tells him to shut up. He says they can still split the money and she can decide what to do with THE COFRE. She doesn’t answer.

Coral and Soledad tell Angel what’s going on, he says ok fine let me get back to working my mack on this honey over here. Thelma drapes herself all over Emiliooo and starts making out with him. For some reason he doesn’t back off, so of course who should walk in just then but Alina and Rodrigo. Emiliooo does a great double take when he sees her. Alina freaks and runs out, Emiliooo tries to chase her but Rodrigo stops him. Emiliooo wants to know what Rodrigo has to do with any of this, Rodrigo says he’ll explain later. Thelma just looks sick to her stomach.

Alfonsina yells at Gasca some more and threatens to kill him. He asks what good is he dead? He tries to sell her on some plan to get even more money from Don Loco.

Luba cries over Gaspar and prays to the virgin for good measure. Bleah. I hate hospital settings, I thought maybe we were done with that on this show. The other guy comes in and Luba says she is too poor to pay for the operation. The guy says it was his responsibility, he will pay for the operation. He says that Luba can give him one of her kidneys. Now she cries from joy and promises Gaspar that he will be fine after all. We still have time for the miracle cure and him getting his brain back.

Emiliooo is super pissed at Angel for inviting him to this party and setting him up. Angel admits to knowing that Alina was alive before. Angel says he set the whole meeting up for him, to end his suffering. He just didn’t plan on Thelma being there, obviously.

Gasca keeps fast talking his way out of getting shot. She tries to order him to say where the cofre is, but he makes her put away the gun. She has no choice but to go along with him if she wants the cofre.

Emiliooo goes off on Angel, he is about to strangle him when Elias pulls him off. Thelma tells Soledad that she is a hypocrite. I don’t know what for or what about, I guess she just wanted to yell at somebody.

Back at Coral’s living room, Rodrigo says it is time to talk. No more excuses. She tries to give him the old “I don’t want to talk about it.” Whatever. She starts ugly crying again and saying how she wasn’t ready for this to happen blah blah blah. Rodrigo, my friend, this is your cue to make tracks. Seriously. This is your last chance to get out. I know you won’t take it, but I wish you would. Rodrigo says Emiliooo thought you were dead, he was just trying to make things right with his wife, I guess. She whines about it, I guess in woman logic you are supposed to just KNOW if your true love is REALLY dead or not.

Elias is going to explain to Emiliooo about Alina being alive when the general interrupts and tells the story himself. Angel tries to explain again, saying that he knew Emiliooo wouldn’t be able to have a good life with Thelma, so he set up this meeting. Of course in Three’s Company fashion it all backfired. Perhaps Angel could have just told Emiliooo about Alina rather than staging this big reveal? Naw that makes too much sense. Thelma is still yelling at Soledad, that she saw her earlier that day and said nothing about Alina being alive. Soledad slaps her across the face. Coral walks up and orders Thelma to leave. She screams it at her actually. She must still be holding onto a little anger from their previous fight. Thelma leaves. Emiliooo wants Soledad to tell him what’s going on. She says she’ll explain. Ok, when? Now is good.

Alina is still whining and Rodrigo missed his chance to bail. She actually has the nerve to cry on his shoulder, literally. Rodrigo has a look on his face like he knows he is about five minutes late on trying to get the hell out of there. I can see it in his eyes. “Oh man what am I still doing here this chick is psycho dammit I should have just bailed when she said she didn’t want to talk about it DAMMIT.”

Emiliooo calmly listens to and understands what Soledad tells him about Luba and the potion, etc. He says he wants to get Alina back. Soledad starts making excuses, like he’s married, Coral interrupts and says Alina wants to see Soledad. EDIT - after seeing the rest of the show, I think Coral said they needed to go see if Alina was ok, not that Alina wanted to see Soledad. Though I wouldn't be surprised if Alina asked for her mother, then when mother came, she said go away I don't want to talk to anyone.

Alina whines “How can all this happen to me? Why?” What a self centered bitch. Rodrigo figures she’s vulnerable, so he tells her she’s pretty when she’s crying and tries to kiss her. She totally cockblocks him and he leaves. On his way out, he swears to always be at her side, now more than ever. Dude, you are getting to leave. Just go! Alina has orange flashbacks of hairy-armed Emiliooo giving her the heart necklace, along with a variety of other memories of the heart necklace and making out with Emilioooo. She says to the room that she needs to forget about him but she can’t.

SA can’t believe the news that Alina is alive. Thelma starts in about something and SA says sure and now you’re going to want my help, right? Thelma acts pissy and says she already apologized so get over it already. Thelma swears that Alina will be sorry she isn’t dead. SA decides she’ll help after all. SA is like the ugly girl at school who will go along with anything just to be part of the clique.

The nurse that saw crazy chick doctor kissing Don Loco is telling the gossip to another nurse. Wait – like 10 hours have passed in the outside world, but only five minutes in here? Is there some kind of hospital time warp? Dra. Loca’s fiancé overhears the chisme, just then Dra. Loca comes in to get her coat. The nurses laugh at her when she leaves.

Angel and Claudia are the only ones left at the party. She tells him that she is glad to just be his friend, he asks why. She says that she heard Coral say that Alina was somebody very important for him. He says yes, at one time he loved her a lot.

Soledad tries to get into Alina’s room, she won’t let her in. Coral tells Soledad that Emiliooo wants to divorce Thelma. In her room, Alina has an orange flashback of Thelma kissing Emiliooo. Is this the first time we’ve had an orange flashback to something that happened earlier in the same show? It might be. Alina whines some more.

Crazy Doctora Loca and Mauricio arrive home, she wants to know what his deal is. He tells her that he overheard about her having something going on with Don Loco. She immediately looks guilty.

Angel says his love for Alina is in the past, now he cares about her like a sister. Claudia buys it.

Crazy Doctora Loca admits to getting frisky with Don Loco. She actually wants the guy to understand it. Whatever. The guy is pissed off, but he sounds like he’s reading his lines off of a card. They decide to break up. Well he decides, she agrees, he leaves, she cries.

Emiliooo moons over Alina when Thelma enters and prohibits him from getting back with Alina. Emiliooo says she doesn’t get to prohibit anything, and she doesn’t get to come into his room. He rightfully calls her out on her previous plan, that she wouldn’t go through with her deal, and that she knows that he’ll try to get Alina back. Thelma glares at him. The producers, after a couple seconds, apparently suddenly remembered that it was the end of the show, so they quickly made her slo-mo impactado. Sorry fellas, you were a little slow on the slow-mo button there.

Monday: Alina tells Emiliooo that she and Rodrigo are going out, and he proposed, and she’s going to marry him. Apparently Rodrigo is a complete idiot, he doesn’t realize that Alina is marrying him just to get back at Emiliooo. Either that or he has no pride.

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La Fea now sharing time slot with Juan Querendon!!

BULLETIN!!

From our recapper Nina, who received this information directly from somebody at Univision:

"LA FEA MAS BELLA" starts airing in a shorter, half-hour duration, starting at the same time, effective Monday, 6-11-07

Apparently new novela "YO AMO A JUAN QUERENDON" debuts Mon. at 8:30-9!!

So this week, our La Fea bloggers will be blogging from 8:00-8:30

And the new Juan Querendon team should start from 8:30-9

The Juan Querendon team is:

Monday: Lucy
Tuesday: Amanda (staying on from La Fea)
Wednesday: Kris (staying on from La Fea)
Thursday: Sylvia
Friday: Jeanne

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Zorro: Friday, June 8, 2007: Esme names her little one, its 110 days and counting and Tobi confronts Cat

Show opens where we left off, Monty po’d that Esme had escaped and he figures out that she escaped through the window. Monty promises Esme that she won’t get far. He calls for one of his thugs.

Meanwhile Esme is in the dark trying to find her way through the woods and assumes that Monty and men know she has escaped.

Monty is ripping his men a new one, calling them idiots and all that while they are in surprise that she escaped. Monty orders them to find Esme else they will be decapitated. Everybody leaves except SAM. Monty gets mad that SAM is there and asks if he understood his orders and threatens to kill everybody (this includes you SAM) if Esme doesn’t appear. SAM takes the hint and is off. Well he didn’t rub above his eye but he must be having a splitting migraine.

Back to the MP & Diego discussion. Diego can’t believe that FS killed his mom. MP is sorry for not telling him sooner. She didn’t dare denounce FS because Regina was a Spanish lady at the time and FS would have received the death penalty. So instead she cancelled the wedding and became a nun as way to find God and ask forgiveness for keeping silent. Diego promises revenge but MP begs Diego not do anything stupid. Diego asks why and MP gives him a huge rehash of what we already know. MP tells Diego that God will make FS pay for all his deeds. Diego doesn’t make any promises because not only did FS take his mom but also Esme.

Back to FS defending MP’s honor with that dude in the tavern. The guy wants to know who FS to defend MP so, her husband. There is sword fighting between the two men and FS gets the upper hand and the guy is flat on the table. FS gets all noble and won’t stain his hands with blood but threatens the guy with running him through should he even mention the name Maria Pia.

At Tobi & Cat’s, Pito confirms FFM (fake fencing master)’s passing. Cat’s distressed being that he was fine in the morning meanwhile Tobi looks guilty. Pito using his CSI techniques deduces that FFM died of shock. Tobi is not interested about how FFM died he wants to bury him but Cat is insistent on knowing why he died. Pito tells them that FFM’s heart exploded like a melon (ummm is that forensic/medical language, I’m no expert but I think not). Tobi asks Pito to close FFM’s eyes and haul him away. Pito sadly informs Tobi that rigor mortis already set in so FFM’s eyes will stay open and without authorization from next of kin he can’t take the body. Tobi & Cat inform Pito of that they have no info not even an address so Pito tells them they will need a military order before he can take the body, until then it’s theirs.

Back the dark woods where SAM is asking the air/Esme if she’s around to please respond. I don’t think SAM realizes how big the woods are, it’s not a closet SAM and I believe she’s had a pretty big head start. He tells the air/Esme that if she was going to escape she shoulda consulted him first, he would have helped her escape. Back to Esme tiptoeing it looks like. She tells her little baby that once they escape they will be very happy. She’s hears the men on her tail.

Cue Amor Gitano, I wonder if we’ll see all of these opening credits?

Commercial for Madre Luna and all I can say is ewwww. A guy has to let go the love of his life, marries another and has a son with her. Now as a cruel twist of fate the son is in love with the women the guy had to let go. ***Shudder***. She’s like a lot of years older than this kid sooo icky. Are the powers that be trying to draw viewers or disgust them?

Diego and Maria continue in their rehash of what we know. Alej knows that FS killed Regina and resulting rift in friendship. Diego was going to be told but then he got amnesia and then Esme’s “death”. Diego talks about his lack of memories of this time and nightmares. MP says Diego probably repressed those memories as a defense mechanism. MP tells Diego that he can’t let these ghosts of the past dominate him.

Back to Esme’s treck, she hides under a minicliff while the bad guys are trying to find her. Esme’s pretty confident and tells Diego, Jr. (yup she’s named him already) that they are safe. She flashes back to Diego telling her how he got the name Zorro. Esme prophesizes that Diego, Jr. will be a brave man who will do great things. Awww, I like this scene, it gets me all gooey inside.

MP and Diego return to hacienda. Mangle is upset that Diego left her alone all day. Oh poor you, you were crying over the Michelin man and didn’t give a fig now you are upset that Diego left you alone? Mangle is surprised to see MP Diego tells her she left convent. Mangle wants to know the skinny but Diego gets miffed and tells her to stop bothering MP. Mangle apologizes to Diego and says she was having a bad day. Diego tells her she isn’t the only one and informs her he’s going to bed. Mangle gets angry that Diego keeps dissing her. Diego finally tells Mangle what we were all thinking, the role of victim doesn’t suit her and likens her to a scorpion (waits for the prey to let down his guard and stings). Mangle gets all teary eyed but Diego isn’t buying. The only time he’s seen her cry was in the morning and he still doesn’t know why she shed them.

At Tobi’s, Cat offers to visit Piza to get the military order releasing the body. Tobi looks at Cat and asks why her and not Tobi. Cat tells Tobi that since Tobi is always busy in the morning she thought she should go. Tobi informs her that taking care of FFM kept him busy who only came to ruin their lives. Cat gets upset because Tobi is who brought him to find Zorro and now he’s dead. Tobi makes his first mistake when trying to get out of a murder rap offers responds to unasked questions. Tobi does his best OJ impression and says it was 100% definatley not his fault (not sure if OJ said it like that but you get the idea). Cat looks at him impactada and says I never said it was and asks what really happened; he was the last one with FFM. Tobi denies that anything occurred, the guys heart stopped that’s it.

Olmos looks at Mangle through the giant peep hole. He tells himself to be patient. He will soon run his hands through her velvety skin (I woulda thought it was scaly considering she is reptilian) and hear her moan.**shudder*** He has a moment with his pillow.

Diego has a grey nightmare and remembers the death of his mom at FS hands. He calls FS an assassin and promises revenge.

Tobi spies Piza leaving the jail. He calls him a disgraceful egghead (cabeza de huevo desgraciado). Piza tells Mejias (?) that if Monty asks for him he went to supervise the search. Tobi follows him.

Back to Esme’s wanderings where she notices that behind the hill is de la Vega hacienda.

Mangle apologizes for having breakfast so early but baby Monty (I just added that) has its own schedule. MP bids everyone good morning and takes her seat. Dol enters and tells Diego that he looks like a truck run him over, hehehe, nothing gets by her. Diego says he didn’t sleep well. Alej marvels at the table settings and Dena walks in and tells him that Yumi and her did it together. Alej proposes that they all go on an outing. Dena gives Yumi a look and Diego and Mangle share one too.

Esme desperately needs water and sees a river. She runs to it and alas its only a mirage (espejismo). She tells her son to endure a little more. She assures him they will be safe there.

Diego is out, he has matters to attend to in the city and Mangle is out, she has to mail a letter. She invites for Diego and her to go and he offers to take the letter to the port. Mangle tells him that she wants to go for a stroll and say hi to her dad. Diego grudgingly accepts. Alej then limits the outing to around the hacienda, considering it’s a huge property I don’t think it will be a two minute walk.

Back to Esme wandering and viola she gets to a river. She gobbles up the water and if I was her I would dunk myself right in.

MP is talking privately with Diego and tells him she noticed the tension between him and Mangle. MP tells Diego he doesn’t want their relationship to change with the new information but Diego assures her the marriage was only to protect family honor. MP reminds him she is his wife and mother of his child. Diego tells her he has his reasons for being distant. MP asks Diego to explain how will he raise his child in a harmonious household. Diego tells MP that he already discussed an agreement but Mangle hasn’t given him an answer. MP asked him to understand that pregnant women are very sensitive and now isn’t the time to propose such agreement. Diego tells MP that about his nightmare and how Regina looked very much like Yumi. Mp asks Diego to forgive her for not telling him sooner about Regina’s death and she’s confident he will assimilate it in a right way.

Mangle bursts into Olmos room (I thought she was going to knock next time) and catches him arranging his blondish color wig. Mangle is all impactada and asks what’s he doing and just cackles at him. Olmos immediately takes it off and puts his regular dark hair wig on. Unfortunately for him its askew which gives Mangle the uncontrollable giggles. Mangle wants to order something from the Indian witch that gave her the potion the other day (that has to be incorrect it was many episodes ago, and I am sure months have passed). Olmos wants to know why but Mangle just laughs and calls him naïve for thinking he will know everything about her. Mangle asks Olmos how far he will go to know what’s inside her. Olmos arches a brow and Mangle tells Olmos he has a dirty mind, what she meant was what was in her mind, her thoughts. She tells him to mind his business about why she needs the potion and reminds him that she’s keeping silent to her dad about the money he’s stealing. She leaves in a fit of giggles calls him a dead dog. Olmos tells the mirror he would go to hell for his beloved Mangle and only 110 days left before potion works.

Esme is enjoying what looks like an orange by that river she found. She tells little Diego that pretty soon she’ll get the hacienda to see Diego.

We cut to the gitanos taking a trek with their belongings. NAC and Renzo are walking side by side and NAC falls. NAC has sprained her ankle it seems but that’s okay Renzo has an idea. He takes her piggy back style and they catch up to the camp. Of course, Laisha doesn’t like it and begins a tirade about how non-gitanos become more important than actual gitanos once they join the clan. Suzi tells Jonas that Laisha is very jealous of NAC (ya think?) but it will be a while before Renzo falls in love again. Jonas doesn’t think the bitterness that has accumulated in Laisha’s soul is a good thing and hopefully she recovers soon. It reminds me of something Yoda said in Star Wars Episode One…sadness leads to anger which leads to hate and hate leads to the dark side.

Cat and Piza are making out heavy duty somewheres while Tobi looks on. You know Tobi if you keep watching them together you will never get the image out of your head. Piza tells Cat it excites him when she dresses in black, makes him think she is a widow. Cat doesn’t want to talk about death and Cat asks for the military order for FFM’s body. Piza says fine and asks if at the same time they could bury Tobi. Piza sooo wants to put a bullet in Tobi but Cat doesn’t want to kill him. Piza tells Cat that he suspects Tobi knows about them and if it excites her. Cat tells him he would die of shock (HA!) and they basically get busy all the way into commercial.

Diego and Yumi run into each other and of course we see Mangle spying and listening in from a distance. Mangle has to go, she’s getting to be privy to a lot of secret information which is very bad. Diego asks what she has and Yumi tells her it’s a remedy her grandma prepared for Dena. Yumi being Regina’s lil sis gets rehashed and the the custom about inheriting the sister-in-law. Yumi feels uncomfortable but Diego says that since Alej is married to a Spanish wife, it’s a kind of a moot point. Then I suppose we are talking about this just so Mangle can hear? Enter Mangle who does the there you are thing and tells him she’s ready to go into the city. She sees Yumi and pronouncing the name but either for real or on purpose trails off. Yumi helps her out and says her Christian name Guadalupe and Mangle agrees that sounds better and basically ignores she’s there and reminds Diego she’s ready. I hope Yumi has realized that Mangle is a witch.

Esme wakes up from her nap hears a carriage go by. She immediately gets up and continues her trek.

Piza makes it to the shack where he gets updated on Esme’s escape and no success in locating her. SAM tells Piza that Monty hasn’t returned and is probably tracking Esme.

We cut to Tobi coming home to find FFM in a pine box. Cat tells him that she was able to get the order from Piza. Tobi asks Cat how she was able to get the order being that he went to meet Piza but was told he had an important errand to attend to. Cat tells him she accidentally found him in the street and asked for the order then. Tobi calls cat a mujersuela (slut right?) how could she do this to him. Cat said she only wanted to help. Tobi gets that evil look in his eye and starts choking Cat and asks her if she helps a lot sleeping with Piza.

SAM assures Piza that he didn’t help Esme escape and Piza begs him to lower his voice. SAM in a lower voice tells him that Esme is a brave woman. Piza says or stupid being that Monty will kill her if he finds her. Piza assumes that Esme will try to find refuge somewhere safe and he knows where. SAM nods and immediately does an impactado face, the de la Vegas. Piza says that would be fatal because Monty is probably thinking the same thing.

In the carriage, Mangle tells Diego that this little trip is a good idea being that he evades her constantly. They need to have a serious talk. Diego tells he they always talk seriously. Mangle wants to talk about the separation agreement. Diego is all ears. Mangle tells Diego that nobody has ever treated her like Diego has. Diego tells her nothing in life is free. Mangle is about to slap Diego in reply to his agreement but he detains her hand. Diego tells Mangle to be careful because his patience has limits, Mangle tells him hers too and plants one on him while Diego tries to pull her off. Of course they travel by Esme who sees the force kiss and interprets wrong.

END OF EPISODE

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Saturday, June 09, 2007

La Fea Más Bella #293 6/8/07 Aurora rides again... and it's a DUI!

(Part 2 is up now. Scroll till you see purple.)

That's #291 by Univision's count; 293 hours of semi-unrequited love.

I don't like it when something that I've grown attached to ends. The first time my parents took me to see a movie - Mary Poppins - they were astonished when I started crying during the happy ending. I wasn't crying because of what was happening in the movie - I was crying because I didn't want it to be over. I would cry bitterly at the end of a trip to the zoo or the beach or especially a day at my beloved, now defunct Lincoln Park (and yes, I cried when they shut the place down too).

As I've gotten older, I've become increasingly reluctant to finish books that I've been reading. I get to the last dozen or so pages and a feeling of dread washes over me. Soon this wonderful universe that I've been visiting will cease to exist... or it mysteries will no longer tempt me... in any case, the magic's about to end. I've got a book that's the last of a series... I've had it for years... never cracked it open. I have the last two episodes of Farscape on a tape that I've never watched. Sometimes I've even sad as I get to the last bites of a good meal.

Is it any wonder, then, that as I sat waiting for the 8:23 train to arrive (I missed the 6:48), I wasn't upset that I wouldn't be home to watch tonight's episode "live"? Is it any wonder that even now, I'm totally absorbed by the Mexico/Cuba fútbol game... even though I supposedly hate soccer? Is it any wonder that I'm suddenly battling an unprecedented urge to vacuum the stairs?

But there are things in life that are worth seeing through to the end. I have faith in Fernando. I have faith in fictitious love, if not the real thing. I even have some faith in Lety. So I will forge on bravely.

And so away we go. Spin, little DVD-RAM disk, spin!!


The old lock-up-the-deadbeat-dad trick

The wedding festivities are interrupted by two policemen with a warrant for Efren's (aka El Cheque's, aka Flaquito's) arrest. Lola is horrified. Yazmin/Jasmine/etc. screams at Lola, blaming her for the trouble. Lola screams back that El Cheque owes her two months' child support. The judge warned him, and now here are the consequences. She, Lola, is well-informed and she knows that it (failing to pay child support) is a prosecutable offense.

The homewrecker's witty reply is "Don't tell me that, it's a lie, I'm not going to believe it, I'm not going to listen." Lola dismisses her and worries about her kids. The cops drag ol' Flaquito away. He says he's afraid to go to jail, tells Jaz/Yas that he loves her, and begs Lola not to let the kids know what's happened. Lola is distraught.

The old lock-'em-together-in-a-room trick

Caro calls Omar a womanizer. "Look who's talking," Omar retorts. Caro is stunned by this remark. "You know very well what I'm talking about," he hints. She demands an explanation. He explains that he saw a man come out of her house early one morning and they were talking about something electrical and incredible that had happened the previous night. She laughs at him, but not as raucously as he deserves. She agrees that that man had done a fabulous job for her. "And you're saying it to my face?!" Omar whines.

Caro laughs again and says yes, he fixed a blown circuit. She had bought a lamp for when... "for when we'd live together... uh... for when you would visit me..."

"Live together?" Omar asks like a happy little boy being offered a lollipop. Or a Furby. Whatever it is that the kids like these days. "You and me, me and you?"

"Who else?" Caro asks, adding mischievously, "unless you want me to ask the electrician..." He laughs, takes her hands, peers into her eyes, admits that he loves her, she says she loves him too, and he kisses her. Wow, his hands really are as big as his head. Nice.

They're still kissing. Those crazy kids.

Next day

Lety is babbling nervously to the Nuevo Leon lady that she can't personally be in charge of the campaign, but don't worry, she'll leave it in the hands of her assistant. Barbara, the Nuevo Leon lady, says that her boss Cristina insisted that Lety be in charge. Also, she heard that Lety's getting married, yay. Lety says that the wedding is kind of the reason she can't manage the campaign. Barbara has a suggestion: Lety can marry the love of her life in the Monterrey Cathedral, and do the campaign at the same time.

Barb is pretty excited about the idea; Lety is overwhelmed... that she, the fea, could marry in such an esteemed place. Lety eagerly accepts: she says it's the dream of every bride to marry in a cathedral. (So I guess Aldo is just going to have to stuff the boat then, huh?) "Monterrey, Monterrey, Monterrey," Lety sighs. (Not "Aldo, Aldo, Aldo.")

More mash notes

Marcia unfolds another anonymous note. "Hello my beloved, I hope you are well. I am moved to write to you again because I imagine that maybe you thought it was a joke in poor taste. Or even worse, something dangerous. I promise that it isn't. My interest is sincere; I am convinced that you are one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. Your angelic face fascinates me - your marvelous eyes - so I'm sending you my email address again so we can begin corresponding, gaining first your confidence, and then your heart."

Marcia is intrigued. I still say this man is keeping way too many of the advantages to himself - he knows her name and where she lives and has even followed her around; he won't even tell her his name and yet she's supposed to trust him.

Well, maybe she can google his email address and find out if he has a myspace page.

The mystery of Luigi

Luigi lovingly caresses the face in the poster of himself that he has on the wall. "I can't go to Monterrey," he moans to Lety and Irma, patting his chest as if he's trying to induce a mimisqui. (Not to be confused with a maniguis!) He can't go to Monterrey, because he would have to go back and be born differently - liking women. Lety seems not to be interested in this and reminds him that they can't throw away this opportunity. Luigi refuses.

Lety puts her foot down. "This time, you're going to do what I tell you, or...." She trails off, realizing she's got nothin'. Luigi says "I'm not a horse!" He is starting to cry. He tells her he's about to speak to her sincerely, for the first time ever. He can't go to Monterrey, and he's not going to go. Never. NEVER. And if Lety insists, he will have to leave Conceptos.

Lety is sympathetic, but she doesn't understand. She asks him nicely for an explanation, but he doesn't want to give one. He gets overwhelmed and asks to be alone. "Please, get out, platypus!" Lety is speechless. Irma signals that she'll take care of Luigi; Lety leaves them.

Wow. Luigi really is crying. His whole face is red. He tries to turn Irma away, but she tells him that things happen for a reason; don't give up on this one just yet. She mentions forgiveness. "I can't, I can't forgive, Irmita," he says. He curls up in his chair and weeps for real.

Introducing... Mrs. Jack Tripper-Doubtfire

Aldo is saying that he'd gladly marry her in the Cathedral of Monterrey. What's important is that they get married. He kisses her and gets ready to take off - he has "many things to prepare." Lety invites him to the house dinner, but he says no, today they'll dine away, because they have many things to celebrate, one of which is that they're marrying in Monterrey, completing their marriage classes, etc. Smoochies. Then he reminds her that he has a chance to get back his old restaurant in Acapulco. He just needs Conceptos to pay him back.

But right now he wants they should go check out the catalog for wedding invitations, and look into decorations, music, chairs, tables, etc. She promises that she'll totally get into it so that their wedding will be a success. He hands her the business card from the restaurant where they'll have dinner at 8. More smoochies and Aldo leaves.

Ferni bounds in, cutely calling her "Doña Lets" and she happily calls him "Don Fets." He claims they have problems. (You're tellin' me!) He takes an orange (ORANGE!) highlighter out of her pencil-cup and starts fiddling with it. He whispers to Lety that Jax wants to have dinner with Aurora and Fernando this evening.

You can tell Fern is taking this threat very seriously by the way he's perched the highlighter on his upper lip. Can you imagine Aldo ever using his upper lip as a pen-tray? NO. And that's why I feel that he is utterly unsuitable for Lety. Lety is a very literate, well-educated woman. She often needs to have a pen around, for signing things, doing math, etc. Most people think it doesn't look very dignified to stick a pen behind your ear, and when you wear glasses it's hard to keep a pen there anyway. That's why it's important to choose a mate whose abilities complement your own needs.

Lety also takes this problem very seriously. She demonstrates this by balancing a pencil on her own upper lip. Too bad she got rid of the mustache, because the whiskers could have held it in place. As it is, it's just sorta hanging crooked, as if Lety doesn't know how to scrunch up her face properly.

Fernando goes on to say that Jax is about to give them some type of news, so it's necessary that Aurora attend. "Jax wants us to unite," he says. Jax wants them to dine with a Walter (he fishes a piece of paper out of his pocket to read) Stanleski, one of the richest media magnates of Europe - he saw one of their shows and he's fascinated with Aurora. Lety thinks that someone should tell Mr. (she takes the paper out of Fern's hand to read it for herself) Blahblehski that Aurora can't go. Jax says Aurora is needed to get this dude to sign a contract for millions of dollars. Fern's not sure what the millions of dollars are for, just that there would be a lot of money coming out of this guy.

Lety weakly protests that she already promised to have dinner with Aldo this evening, and... oh no. Does everyone see where this is going? This is going to be like that scene from Mrs. Doubtfire, combined with the episode of Three's Company where Jack had scheduled multiple dates on the same night. That's not going to be easy to live up to.

Naturally, Mr. (Julie checks her notes) Stanleski is only going to be in Mexico for one night, but Fern remembers that his prime directive is to protect Lety's relationship with Aldo, so he's just going to tell Jax it'll have to be some other time.

But I guess Lety isn't so eager to pass up an evening as Aurora with Fern. Fortunately, she has a great excuse: gotta pay Aldo. Not to mention get Conceptos back for Fernando and the Mendi-Roels.

"But what are we going to do?" Fernando asks. "I already know," Lety answers with conviction and a crazy gleam in her eye. "Lety and Aurora are going to eat tonight in the same restaurant."

Fern is worried about this plan. Lety reiterates the need to get this guy's money. He reluctantly agrees.

At the Deadbeat Dad Hotel

Lola visits El Cheque in jail. She has some clothes and a blanket and some food. He says he's there because of her. She says no, he's there because he didn't follow through on his fatherly obligations. She tells him the kids are worried about him. She shows him a photo of him with them. He's worried about what she told them, or if they saw him get arrested. She assures him that they didn't see anything, but they had asked for him and she had to tell them he had gone away. They miss him.

Ah, in a case of perfect timing, Jaz/Yas has come to visit as well. She is empty-handed, except for her purse, which seems to be a bit light in the wallet area today. Lola gets up to leave. He thanks her for the stuff and she's gone.

El Cheque happily turns to his beloved little chippie. She says she's missed him... so much... that she thinks it'd be better if her "name" were not associated with his for the duration of this "situation." El Cheque is aghast that she's worried about her reputation, but she claims she's doing it for his own good; that he knows that she loves him and that she'll be careful about his reputation so that Lola doesn't take everything away from him.

El Cheque abruptly accuses her (after all these months!) of only caring about him for his money. "You never really loved me, did you. Tell me."

"What do you think?" she replies coldly. Now that the party's over, the sweet fluffy little homewrecker is gone. She has dropped the act so quickly, I'm a bit dizzy just watching. She is even colder and more venemous than I ever would have imagined. "Did you believe, Fatso, did you think that I was going with you for your pretty face? Ha! It was always for the money, because you are no more than a fat guy filled with lonjas (markets?), insufferable and revolting."

Not so long ago, Efren Garcia had two women fighting over him. Today, all that's left is a photo of his kids. He holds it to his heart, looking remorseful.

Practice

Lety and Fern begin to develop the plan. Fernando is worried that Aldo will figure it out. Lety thinks they need an accomplice.

After the commercial, we're at the restaurant. Fern and Tomas (the accomplice) use a stopwatch to time Lety's transformation to Aurora. It's taking too long. (Hair up, black lace dress.) Lety complains that if they pressure her it will take even longer. Fern reminds her that there's going to be a lot more pressure soon. They continue badgering her until she emerges from the restroom - and then, they are speechless. For maybe half a second. Tomas says that was ten minutes; Fernando says wow. He is impressed. :-) They both beg her to do the Aurora voice. "Don't touch me," Fern hisses in imitation. She finally does it. Fern and Tomas laugh; then Tomas blows a whistle and reminds them to get back to work. Fern says she needs to spend maybe five minutes with Jax. Lety thinks it needs to be even quicker. She'll show up, tell Jax that she has another engagement and has to go. The diva treatment.

Fern wonders if Aldo will wait 15 minutes. Lety thinks he's smart (even though he can't balance a writing instrument on his upper lip) and will suspect something's up. Fern briefly mocks this, then remembers his Prime Directive (must... protect... wedding...). He tells Tomas that's why they need him - he's going to distract Aldo during all of this. Tomas wants to know how. Fern tells him to make something up. (BIG MISTAKE.)

Fernando tries to choreograph the scene. I don't know how he thinks he's going to have any control over where people sit, but I guess we'll see. Tomas refers to Lety as "Lety la fea," and Fernando corrects him. Lety explains why it takes so long to go from Aurora to Lety as well - all the things she has to do (do the hair, put on the mustache, etc.). "It's tough to be a fea nowadays," she tells them. Fern disputes the "fea" title again. He continues to describe his vision of how things will unfold. He figures by the time Lety comes out of the bathroom and comes to Aldo's table, it'll have been about 20 minutes. Tomas says his distraction will only be good for about that long, so Lety had better be on time. They squabble some more over minutiae and then take their places for another timed run-through.

Nice stalkers finish last

Carmina is in Aldo's office again. He's examining a couple of new Flavor of Life books. She's saying she supervised their printing personally, and tomorrow they'll be in all the stores, in the periodicals section (just in case anyone wants to look for it!). Aldo is very impressed with the books, if not with Carmina. He says these books are a signal that his wedding will be a success.

Unfortunately, even if you put the two books together, they're not quite heavy enough to effectively hit him in the head with.

But wait - not so fast with the head-thwapping just yet. Get a load of this: Carmina asks him if he'd like to go out to dinner to celebrate! Yes! She is STILL trying to get a piece of the Aldo-action! He says no, he's got an important engagement: he's having dinner with Lety!

Carmina looks disappointed that her clever seduction plan has failed.

Domestic bliss

Tomas kisses the side of Alicia's head and says "off I go." She wants to know where. "It's muy noche!" she tells him. He says he'd like to explain, but... he suddenly looks scared and makes for the door. She demands an explanation. She asks if he's steppin' out on her. "Are you jealous?" he laughs, snorting. Of course, she denies being jealous. He makes good his escape. "I don't like to be alone," she mutters sadly to herself.

Aurora spills the beans
Aldo says, "For the Flavor of Life!" He and Lety clink their wine glasses together. She congratulates him with a lot of words and forced emotion. She giggles something about hitting Carmina, or Carmina hitting her. Aldo says he's looking forward to spending this time with Lety, "you and I alone, just enjoying ourselves." Lety gets all goofy with him.

Fernando and Jax show up. To prevent Jax from seeing Lety, he pulls Jax around into a big hug. Fern signals to Lety, and Lety wiggles her eyebrows at him in reply. Aldo is concerned by Lety's apparently unprovoked twitching. Lety says she slept on her neck wrong, so he gets up to give her a massage. Now both he and Lety are facing towards Fern and Jax; Jax is recovering from the hug and about to turn around. Fern ushers Jax to a seat. Meanwhile, Lety experiences a miraculous recovery and gets Aldo to get back on his mark. I mean chair. I definitely did not mean to imply that Aldo was being treated as a prop in some insane charade without his knowledge. No sirree.

Jax wants to know when Aurora's coming. They talk briefly about some singer named Alejandro, I think. Fern reminds Jax that divas never arrive on time, and anyway, that magnate guy isn't here yet either. Jax points out that Walter what's-his-face is coming over from Frankfurt. But if he doesn't see Aurora, it will all be over. He's not going to want to sign, and they can say goodbye to millions of dollars that they can't lose.

Meeting with someone to sign a contract you've never seen, for millions of dollars to do you-don't-know-what, this is a good idea why? There are companies that do quite well for themselves by offering unbelievably large sums of money to small companies to do some project... the small company can't see the flaw in this... and it turns out that big company's project is so much bigger than the small company expected, that the ungodly sum was actually quite petite after subtracting out all of the expenses.

But I digress.

Fern tries to calm Jax and begins whistling loudly. Tomas whistles loudly in reply. There is some more gesturing, then Lety begins snapping her fingers. (She tells Aldo she's counting the minutes till the day of their wedding.) Aldo tells Lety he's got a big piece of news for her: he's made a big step towards getting his restaurant back. (Tomas is creeping along the floor toward them.) I don't get his explanation (it sounds like the restaurant's already in foreclosure??), but it's hard to pay attention to him while Tomas is still sneaking around with the whistle in his mouth. He takes a breadstick off of someone's plate and throws it at Aldo and Lety. Or maybe he only starts to. Lety suddenly exclaims, "I'm going! I'm going!", startling Aldo but appeasing Tomas. She tells Aldo she has to go to the bathroom right now. Tomas skulks around behind a plant and prepares to distract Aldo.

He has an idea. He goes and tells the chef that Aldo DomensaEEn wants to write about him. The chef is honored and thrilled. Tomas encourages him to speak at length with Aldo about all of his chefly secrets.

Meanwhile, Lety is doing the Aurora thing as fast as she can. She's in such a rush that she's being sloppy.

Aldo gripes about having to wait for Lety. Out comes the chef to tell Aldo all of his secrets. Aldo is bemused by the chef's impromptu visit, and points out that, chef-to-chef, he would never ask another chef to reveal his secrets. He asks the chef who put him up to this.

Tomas is looking at the stopwatch and urging Lety to hurry up. Lety warns him that she's driving him crazy, then wonders, if Tomas is there bugging her, then who's distracting Aldo? He tells her about the restaurant's chef.

Finally Aurora is ready. Tomas points out the chef to her and tells her to be careful. (The chef is calling Aldo "Saldo," which means "balance." Not sure I get the joke unless it's just the general amusement of another person getting his name wrong again.) Aldo is ignoring the chef and looking over his shoulder towards the bathroom.

Aurora walks right past Fern without looking at him and allows Jax to kiss her hand. Fern greets Aurora as well and takes her other hand. "Don't touch me," she reminds him. He drops her hand and tries not to smirk. (Tomas crawls along the floor to watch.) Fernando tries to make small talk and calls her Doña Aurora. She protests, don't call me Doña, there's only one of those - "may my friend La Felix rest in peace." (A reference to Mexican actress Maria Felix, who was known as La Doña.)

She warns Jax that she doesn't have much time. Jax tries to argue, but Aurora says that Fernando already told her about the big magnate Walter... (Fern hands her the paper so she can read, but she doesn't have her glasses on) Stanilaski. "Stasleski," Jax corrects her, miffed. Aurora says she doesn't want to wait for him, but Jax says he's the owner of the most important channels in Europe. Aurora stands and says that he can't be important enough to make Aurora Mayer de Salinas wait. Jax gets her to sit down again and says, "but you have to wait for him, right now, is that clear?" Aurora begins whining "I can't" in her Lety voice, but Fern cuts her off and says she needs to clear her throat. She does so with a glass of wine. I believe this would be her second - the first was with Aldo.

Speaking of Aldo, the chef is getting up and saying, "Please keep tasting, Mr. Saldo." Tomas, hiding behind some sparse-looking foliage, panics as Aldo looks at his watch and gets up to check the bathroom for Lety. Tomas jumps out to intercept him - thinking fast, he says he came over alone because his chica is busy "doing some things." He invites himself to sit down and tell Aldo all of his troubles, namely the gynecologist's alleged recommendations which have resulted in Tomas not getting any action for the last few weeks. And that's why he's here alone. If he stays at home, there's too much temptation.

Aldo's reply to this is completely drowned out by music and there's no caption. If anyone here can read lips in Spanish, we'd all be most grateful. :-)

Aurora hurries back to the restroom, complaining that she hates Walter "Malvaski." She's waving her arms around and seems slightly buzzed, but tells herself she has to go through with it. She reaches for some eye makeup remover.

A moment later, Lety emerges from the restroom. She gives Aldo a kiss, they toast, and she downs another glass of wine. Then she finishes his. (This makes four. Now I know for sure that Lety has never seen Mrs. Doubtfire - if she had, there's no way she would be drinking right now.)

Shortly thereafter, she's Aurora again. Walter What's-his-face has arrived. Aurora stumbles slightly as she approaches, and Fern hurriedly puts her in his chair. As he pushes her chair to the table, she looks like she's on a queasy amusement park ride. They all toast, and L'Aurorety guzzles drinky #5.

Next thing we know, Tomas is looking at his stopwatch again as Aurora dashes for el baño. She's now seriously impaired, but manages to pull herself together, more or less. Her granny blouse is untucked, but she's still wearing the right face and clothes and jewelry as she kisses Aldo and slumps in her seat, proclaiming "I love you so much, so much."

Now back to the bathroom. I don't know if she had another drink with Aldo just now, but the previous five we already know about (that's more than a 750 ml bottle's worth) are definitely catching up with her. She's draping the dress and wig over herself every which way and laughing in the mirror.

Somehow she finishes changing. She mushes her face against the bathroom window and crosses her eyes and grins goofily at the sensation of the cool glass on her lips, which are probably getting numb. She barely manages not to tear her dress as it gets caught in the door. She steadies herself between the wall and a potted plant, fixes her eyes on Jax's table, and proceeds with steely determination. Walter Blahblahski gives her drink number 6 (or 7) "for your beauty." She tries to toast to his something as well, but she slurs the last word. It sounds like "remate" which means "end." Hmm. She turns to Fern and whispers loudly at him to behave himself - "they're going to give us their business." Fortunately, Walter is charmed. Tomas grimaces nervously as Aurora finishes the drink.

She bumps into the bathroom door and then remembers how to work the doorknob. She laughs at herself in the mirror and tells herself that her boyfriend must be pretty desperate by now. She tries to drink out of the bathroom faucet, but can't reach. She mumbles some more as she reaches for her Lety clothes.

Walter is telling Jax and Fern that he likes Aurora, but unfortunately he has to leave. When he gets to Frankfurt, he'll send them the papers to close the deal. Fern happily agrees. Walter thanks them and gives Fern a big back-slapping hug. "How strong and fornidos (??) the Germans are," Fern says. Fern congratulates himself and Jax, and asks how many countries this will put their show in. Jax says that for now, it'll be 20 countries. Fern and Jax gloat over the immense amount of money they'll be making.

The evening's mission is accomplished. Conceptos will be able to pay off its debt to Aldo, and Aldo will be able to buy back his old restaurant. A happy ending is in sight. At this point, NOTHING CAN POSSIBLY GO WRONG.

Tomas is warning Lety that he can't distract Aldo any more, and that she needs to come out. She says she'll be out in minutes, or go to the dogs. (Something like that.) She assures Tomas that she's okay, so he goes to the bar. She is just a few steps behind him. She stumbles back to Aldo's table. "My love, my Sun" she crows loudly. Aldo looks up, stunned. "Another toast!" she howls, brandishing drink number 7 at least.

Now we can see why Aldo's so impactado. She's wearing Lety's jacket over Aurora's gown. She's wearing Aurora's face and Lety's hair. And there's a huge, scary, bright red grin on her face. Tomas rushes to her side, preparing to do damage control.

Aldo stands. He looks disappointed and bewildered. For a moment, Lety's grin seems to droop, as if she has figured out that something has gone wrong. But then she smiles again and wiggles her eyebrows at him.



Monday
Lety puts on her glasses, looks in the mirror, and realizes why Jax and Aldo are staring at her like that. Aldo's cold sore throbs with outrage.

Labels:


Friday, June 08, 2007

Acorralada #103 6/8/07 – Friday – Bruno Lingers On. And On.

Dimwit and Bruno continue to stare at each other wordlessly.

Isabel is still calling her friend Eugenia back to look at the newspaper article about the stolen baby.

Dimwit swears ad nauseam she's going to dump Max. Bruno makes her repeat it over and over. Bruno then says "Even at death's door I'm more powerful than you!"

Marfil tells Max she believes Bruno is going to tell them where the baby is. HA!

Fidiota goes to meet another new character, Rodrigo. He's allegedly the best criminal lawyer in Miami. Apparently he and Fidiota's dead husband were like brothers. Rodrigo is all smiles after seeing Fidiota again. She fills him in on her life since prison; she's an attorney and she found her daughters. She then asks for his help in defending Little Doormat. Rodrigo is all too happy to oblige.

Bruno continues to torment Dimwit. Dimwit continues to beg. Finally Bruno becomes apoplectic. DoK runs in and throws Dimwit out. Bruno laughs at Dimwit and says she'll NEVER tell Dimwit where Maxito is.

Mummy is standing in the waiting area when Maxi-Moron walks up. She is amazed he is walking so well. Guess the acid didn't work the way Doc Evil said it would. Mummy was hoping Max would still be blind. Dimwit runs out of Bruno's room and up to Max. She tells him the agreement she made Bruno, but Bruno didn't keep up her end of the bargain. Max isn't surprised. DoK walks up and summons them to his office. Mummy is taking this all in. Wow, Mini-Max is missing and Bruno won't tell them where to look!

Eugenia and Isabel put together the situation in which Bruno stole the Irascible baby. Apparently two brains are better than one. Eugenia reminds me of the heroine's mom in My Big Fat Greek Wedding.

Diablo is fretting that Bruno will implicate him in the baby-napping. Nancy the Ninny brings him juice. Apparently she plans to wait on him hand and foot in anticipation of Diablo dumping Dimwit and marrying her. Diablo lays it on thick and heavy. If she keeps his secret, he promises to dump Dimwit, fall in love with her, and marry her one day. They kiss. Ninny glows and Diablo glowers after she leaves. He mocks her after she leaves the room floating on cloud nine. Diablo really has no redeeming qualities.

DoK is talking with Maxi-Moron, Dimwit, and Marfil. Bruno's condition is too delicate for them to interrogate her any further. Marfil tries to hide a smirk. DoK says they are going to have to rely on the police to find their son.

Mummy comes to visit Mommy. Mummy throttles Mommy.

Rodrigo is still chatting up Fidiota. He's convinced Gaby will win her case and not have to go to jail. "Enough about business. You got a man?" Fidiota tells him about her heartbreaking situation with Pasta.

Sylvie, Mariposa, and the other transvestite are trading wigs. Mariposa gets the Lhasa Apso wig and Sylvie gets Mariposa's. Iggy and Camila are mocking this motley crew, but it's like a reunion of best friends. Mariposa grabs Sandy's hair to see if it's real. It is.

Mummy is still strangling Bruno and telling her to die. DoQ walks in and wants to know what's going on. Why is Mummy in Bruno's room? Do they know each other? Mummy says she walked into the wrong room by mistake. Mummy leaves and Mommy is crying "Deborita! My baby!" DoQ tells Bruno to calm down.

Granny M and Lala wheel Diablo into the waiting room where Maxi-Morose is sitting. "Any word from Bruno?" "Not a word," replies Max.

Eugenia and Isabel are still discussing what to do about the "brat." Isabel doesn't want to go to jail for "kid"napping. They decide to wait for Bruno to return. They refer to her as being crazier than a goat on skates "una cabra en patines."

Speaking of crazy, the scene at the jail continues with Sylvie telling them about Maxi-Moron's and Dimwit's missing child. That's good news to Doc Evil and Camila, who hope the baby is never found. More CFM shoes are thrown from across the hallway.

Rodrigo is still putting the moves on Fidiota. She deserves to love and be loved. The Violin of Vicissitude saws away in the background.

Dimwit joins the cozy little wake. Diablo says that perhaps they should face the possibility that Mini-Max may never be seen again. Maxi-Morose tells him to shut up and not make any more stupid comments.

Eugenia is trying to get Isabel to turn the baby over to the police. Isabel is afraid she'll get in trouble. She's already lost her nursing license thanks to the authorities. Eugenia leaves to feed her kids lunch. If they baby is still there when she returns, she's going to take the baby to authorities herself! OoD. Isabel chews on her lip.

Lunkhead is studying his lines and waxing poetic over Gaby and how badly he treated her in the past. We get a flashback of Gaby, pre-makeover. She's crying as she's leaving the Irascible Mansion, and he's crying for being such a spineless schmuck who can't stand up to his mother. His little reverie is broken up when Pillow appears and wants to help him. She appears contrite; although I'm sure she's got a plan.

The wake continues. The conversation is so boring I can't help but notice the paint-by-numbers artwork on the walls. Diablo should take a cue from the colors.

Isabel is re-reading the article. They've listed numbers to call. What's an Evil Nurse to do?

Fidiota has apparently fended off Rodrigo with a stick. She's now home and wants to know the latest. Nada. Every time I see Nancy, she's in the same white shirt with her bra showing through. The poor girl apparently hasn't even warranted the attention from the Wardrobe Department. Come to think of it, given what Yolanda has been stuck wearing, I suppose Nancy is lucky. The phone rings. It's Isabel. . .

Pillow wants to be friends with Lunkhead. He can count on her. She feels bad about all the dirty, rotten things she done to him. Lunkhead tells her not to worry. Clearly he's over her. They agree to be friends, he can call her any time he needs her. She then brings up wanting to start over with a clean slate.

Isabel wants to talk to Dimwit about the baby. OoD.

Princess Fiona is still lounging on the bed dressed in a leopard print teddy. She is remembering all the wonderful moments she had with Max before he shacked up with Marfil. We see a flashback to Max and Princess Fiona in bed. He says he needs to be straight with her. He loves her, but he's not in love with her. "Those are two distinct things," he counsels. She tells him she loves him. She's sad that he's going to marry Marfil. Back in the present, Princess Fiona is still going on and on about Max's kisses and how she's never been able to forget him, even after marrying boring Cousin Eddie. Blech, as Nina would say.

Pillow is still trying to get Lunkhead back, but he's clearly not interested. Apparently her charms are no longer working on Lunkhead. He only wants Little Doormat, even if Little Dormat is engaged to Kike. Finally Pillow gives up and leaves.

Fidiota is trying to get info out of Isabel, but Isabel will only speak to Dimwit.

Marfil goes into to see Bruno. Bruno tells her Debora is alive. Marfil is impactada.

Mummy is laughing that no one will believe Bruno if Bruno says she saw Debora.

Fidiota is STILL trying to get Isabel to tell her about Mini-Max. Isabel is not budging. Finally Isabel hangs up. Fidiota tells Gaby and Ninny that she was just speaking with a woman who either has Maxito, or knows where he is.

Just as Mummy predicted, Marfil doesn't believe Bruno. Bruno is beside herself.

Fidiota calls Max's cell phone. Dimwit needs to come home immediately. A woman called about Mini-Max and refused to speak to anyone but Dimwit. Did I mention Max has on a shirt that is three sizes too small for him? It's pastel. Dimwit rushes out with Max and Diablo yells at his mom and Granny M to hurry up and take him home.

Isabel is in a dither. She doesn't want to spend the rest of her life in jail for kidnapping.

Fidiota, Little Doormat, and Ninny are trying to speculate about the woman who called.

Eugenia shows up at Isabel's apartment. Isabel says she called the parents but they weren't home. She plans to call back later.

Emili-Oh is trying to make Caramel realize that Puncho is a tool who doesn't deserve a woman as wonderful as her. She can't help it. She loves only Puncho. The Violin of Vicissitude plays a pathetic tune.

Puncho shows up at Perfumes 'R Us hollering for the Munequito de Pastel. He brings new meaning to the expression, "making a scene." He's come to remove Emili-Oh's teeth! Beatriz doesn't know what to make of him.

Dimwit can't stand the wait. She keeps asking why Fidiota doesn't have more info. She's going to die from nerves!

Puncho is still yelling. Beatriz tries to get him to calm down, but it's useless. He's calling Emili-Oh every name in the book. Finally Emili-Oh hears him and is prepared to do battle. Caramel begs him not to make a scene.

Eugenia is trying to give Isabel the phone to call the baby's parents again.

Everyone is gathered in the living room of Psycho Mansion waiting for the phone to ring. Finally it rings and everyone jumps out of their skin. Isabel comes through. Isabel tells Dimwit that Bruno dropped off the baby and never returned. Dimwit wants to know where her baby is.

Credits roll.

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Zorro - June 7, 2007 MP and Cami reveal secrets; Dena plays matchmaker; Esmy escapes

EPISODE - June 7, 2007:
* Z surprise ambush of Piza and bandits on bluffs. Z jumps down and starts fighting Piza and bandits. (they are no match for Z and go down 1-2-3.)

* Esmy struggles with iron bars on overhead window. She mutters to herself that she has to escape for her and her baby. She hears the door unlatch. She climbs down and sits on the grain sacks as Leo and Sarco come down. Leo watches Esmy as Sarco checks around the floor and sacks - nothing suspicious or unusual. Leo orders Esmy to stand so he can inspect the bars on the overhead window. He determines, nothing is wrong, they're just paranoid. They leave - Esmy looks intrigued as she glances from them to the window.

* Marquesa and entourage roll their way down the dirt road. Marquesa is asleep. Vicente is laying down a line of gunpowder along the road as he holds a lighted cigar in his mouth. Z whistles for Tornado to help. The horse moves to the roadway. Piza and bandit try for round two with Z; Z slugs Piza then takes out the bandit with two punches. He turns and watches Tornado in the road. The entourage spot Tornado in the middle of the road, leaping and snorting. Marquesa wakes as her head assistant calls for the men to get ready to fire on the horse - Marquesa tries to talk them out of the order. Vicente finishes laying down the gunpowder line and is about ready to use the cigar to light it as he spots the horse and the coach/entourage on the road. Z whips Vicente and holds a gun pointed at him, Piza comes up behind Z, and Z is in the midst of a standoff with the two of them. Coach approaches Tornado - horse backs off and leaves the road. Marquesa is happy, she thinks it is such a majestic horse as she watches it trot away. Z forces Piza to drop his gun and join Vicente. Z tells them he knows about Monty giving the order to kill Marquesa as he twirls the guns around his fingers and lands them back in his holsters. He leaves a message with them for Monty to expect many more surprises from him. Z mounts onto Tornado and tells them Monty shouldn't worry about his missing wealth, it's in good hands - the hands of the poor of Los Angeles. Vicente and Piza watch Z ride away. Vicente wonders what to do now about the Marquesa; Piza is confused and wondering who is this Zorro?

* Toby is in his Zorro costume in his living room - he is acting out his own little scene. Maestro wanders in - Toby whips his sword around and slices the shirt of maestro. Maestro is so impactado he thinks that Zorro just tried to kill him. Toby tries to explain it's just him in the costume. Maestro is more impactado thinking Toby is Zorro and he has a heart attack and drops dead on the spot. Toby is impactado.

* Soldiers follow SK, Lila and group of women at leper hospital. One soldier starts to make comments that SK is his girlfriend and he starts to approach her and make snide flirting comments to her. SK is disgusted and slugs him to the ground and scolds him for his insolence. The head of the troop apologizes to the ladies and the soldiers leave immediately.

* Esmy has succeeded in getting two bars off the overhead window.

(Cue theme song and opening credits)

* Vicente argues with Piza about Z's interference with their plan and the orders. Piza walks away. Vicente and men pick up powder barrels; Piza turns around, aims his gun at Vicente and shouts "you're right, nothing happened here. because you guys no longer exist!" Vicente screams - Piza shoots and "KABOOM" - the gunpowder explodes and the three die.

* Back at Z-cave, D tells B thank you for the advance notice of Monty's orders against the Marquesa. He updates B with what happened on the road. He realizes that it's getting more and more dangerous by the minute. D goes to change.

* Monty pays Fer a visit at the governor's office. Monty wants money and support; he insists that his orders to kill Marquesa and nullify the de la Vega family's influence in town will be successfully completed. Fer isn't so sure, especially where the de la Vega family is concerned. Monty smart-mouths off about Fer's own family members and especially MP being part of the family. Fer changes subject back to reason for Monty's visit. Fer advises to have patience and wait. Monty says "of course, because the de la Vega family's days will be numbered without the Marquesa's protection."

* MP explains to Dolly in the hacienda mansion why she left the convent (she's in love with Fer); Dolly is bewildered and frustrated. MP explains some more her position. Dolly says what do you want now, to live happily ever after? MP doesn't know for sure, she needs to discover who she really is first.

* Yumi sits with Dena in bedroom. Yumi is there with her grandma WB's brew to help Dena get up and move on. Dena is thinking of Alej a lot and doesn't want him to be alone and feeling guilty. Yumi is confused. Dena continues her sad soliloquy and asks Yumi to help her.

* MA still cries in bed, thinking about her one true love who died. D stops by and asks what's wrong? is it the baby? Indignantly, MA screeches the baby is fine. leave me alone. D is still curious and asks if it has something to do with his proposal? MA screeches no it isn't that - get out! leave me alone now! D says if she needs him, he will be in his room, and leaves. As MA pauses her tears, she realizes that she needs more information - all the information - about Michelin's death. She decides to write to her friend Marianela.

* Olmos meets with Selenia, who gives him some special potion and a few instructions for it. He asks for more information about the potion - how long for it to take effect? - she says to pay the balance due and she will give him more information and isntructions. He takes bottle and leaves. Tarsisio brings cup of wine to Selenia and asks her about the business with Olmos. She tells him about her ring of India jemstone and she needs three wishes for ring to work. He congratulates her for her underhanded trick. She agrees, she knows she is the one and only great Selenia!

* MP talks with D about wanting to get closer to him. D thinks of her as his second mother. She wants to share her first glass of wine with him. He's surprised and laughs. She's serious. He says he'll run and get a bottle of his father's private inventory in the office. She requests to go to the town cantina - D is surprised by the request and tells her that only men go there - she's shocked and thinks that is discrimination.

* Agapito visits Fer in the governor's office. The one trade our town jack-of-all-trades doesn't do - seamstress. Fer is disappointed because he is prepared to pay handsomely for a change in image and wardrobe. Agapito offers to find a lady in town who can do the best job for him. Agapito offers to take down his measurements - Fer says to just send the seamstress over. Agapito leaves. Fer mutters to himself, he is changing his image for MP.

* D walks MP into cantina. D isn't sure she should be there. MP is determined to enjoy herself and see how the people really live. Raquel is astonished to see D and MP there - D introduces her to his auntie MP. Raquel enthusiastically shows them to a table. Manuel and his friend stare at MP the whole time, they gossip and "check her out." MP spots them staring at her.

* As Esmy struggles with the third rod, she drops one of the other ones she had in her hands. It lands on the floor with a loud clank. She stops, paranoid if someone heard it. She has to continue, she has to escape. She returns to twisting and pulling on the rod.

* Dena gives Yumi a makeover so Yumi looks like Regina/Toypurnia. Yumi is like "what the heck is this stuff you're putting on my lips?" Dena wants Yumi to replace her in Alej's life. Yumi tries her best to convince Dena to fight to stay alive and be with Alej herself. Dena can't live with thinking or imagining - she can't do it (especially if her own brother had anything to do with Esmy's death).

* Olmos sneaks back into the de la Vega main house, clutching his little bottle of "love potion no. 9." Don Alej stops him in the hallway and asks him why no one told him he was living there. Olmos stutters and stammers an explanation and a formal apology and introduction (including the part that he works for Fer and MA). Alej doesn't like the idea that Fer's personal assistant is living under his roof and warns Olmos that if Fer tries anything to get close to MP or any member of his family, Olmos will be expelled immediately from the hacienda. Olmos assures him that he is only there to watch over MA.

* Dena tells Yumi she's not scared of death, only worried about Alej being happy with Yumi. Yumi tries to argue but Dena is determined to carry out her plan. Yumi reluctantly agrees to go along with it. Dena says that Yumi will have to go by her christian name, "Guadalupe" and will become companion to General Alejandro de la Vega.

* D and MP enjoy their drinks at the cantina. She smiles at the men at the table still staring at her. D spots them and wants to go over and tell them to stop. MP stops him and tells him not to do anything. (she's kind of flattered).

* Esmy takes a breath as she works on removing the third iron rod. She gets it down. She catches her breath and mutters, "there's hope! there's hope after all!"

* Camila is dizzy gathering wood around the gypsy camp. Renzo asks her what's wrong? She tells him vaguely and tries to leave; he asks her to open up to him, he wants to help. She tells him she has more demons in her past than just to slave traders who raped and abused her. As a child, she tells him, she was abused by her step-father. She tried to be a nun at the convent to find peace, but she never found any peace from her past. He tries to supportive and understanding - he wants to protect her and help her move forward. She thinks she's cursed, condemned to suffer. She walks away. Laisha watches Renzo lean on the tree, bewildered.

* D asks MP if she wants some more wine. She says the wine was only to give her courage to tell him a huge secret she's been keeping from him. D is intrigued. She tells him the secret is about his mom's death. He swallows hard. She needs to tell him in private. D pays the tab and they leave. Fer enters and wonders why MP was there, why D escorted her there. Raquel welcomes him, another town dignitary at the cantina on the same day; she escorts him to the table - she runs to get him a bottle of wine. Fer listens in on the conversation between Manuel and his friend about MP. He doesn't think much of it until Manuel's friend starts to make rude comments about MP's beauty and body and how she's a catch for any man. He turns into a green one-eyed monster. He stands up and demands the man take his comments back. Manuel and his friend are surprised. Fer pulls out his sword and challenges the man to a swordfight right there in the cantina. Manuel hands his friend a sword - the fight starts; Fer gets in a punch to the jaw and the man falls to the ground for a brief moment.

* MP and D walk to a quiet spot outside. She tells him how she remembers his mom, and that Yumi is almost an exact likeness, like a painting. D is confused to where this is going. MP continues to talk about the timeperiod surrounding Alej going off to fight and Toypurnia taking D to live with her tribe. D remembers things vaguely, like in nightmares, but nothing specific. MP apologizes for not saying anything to him before about who killed his mom. Then she blurts it out that Fernando Sanchez de Moncada killed his mother. D is muy impactado.

* Garcia knocks on the shack door. The men let him inside. Leo stops him and orders Sarco to pat him down and search him. He's clean. They permit Garcia to go to visit Esmy down in the cellar. As Garcia and men go to open the cellar door, Monty appears and says he will take the stuff down to Esmy himself.

* Down in the cellar, Monty hangs the torch on the wallbracket, puts down the linen and water pitcher on the sacks, and laughs at his presumed success in eliminating Marquesa. He whips out his cat-o-nine-tails from his belt. He turns to the bed on the floor and whacks it hard. WHAT! NO MOVEMENT! NO WHIMPERING! He rips the covers off to reveal two sheaves of wheat. He looks up at the window and realizes ESMY ESCAPED!

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No Destilando Amor for 6/8/07 - Reminder

Soccer fans can feed their need tonight. Destilando fans will need to get their fix tonight by watching Monday's previews over and over and over and over........

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Destilando June 7: What happens in Manzanillo, stays in Manzanillo

Susannah just sent this to me, here it is! Thanks, Susannah! I think there is no show tonight?

Aaron tells Patricio they will move the clandestine tequila onto boats when Rod is there, so it won’t be discovered. Patricio is concerned that they are risking the company’s good name. But Aaron reminds Pat that it’s only Rod, Mariana, and Patricio’s fiancée Lluvia who are signing the documents. Neither he nor Patricio would be implicated if anything came to light. Patricio says what happens to Lluvia happens to me.

Just then, Lluvia enters Pat’s office with some documents. Aaron greets her and her legs, giving the happy couple his best for the New Year and their prospects for marriage. He goes to shake Pat’s hand. Pat tells him to get lost.

Lluvia whines that it was a mistake to have "had relations" with Aaron when she worked for him. And it would be an even bigger mistake to marry Patricio now, given her past with Aaron and how the family feels about that. Pat tells her he doesn’t care, as long as he has her.

Gavi and Dr. Erika are in the garden in Cuernavaca with drinks. Is it really possible that what Rod says is true: that Gavi is the only woman in his life, despite his sudden marriage to Isa?

In DF, Ricardo tells Isa the case for her divorce from Rod would be weak, since they married so quickly. Isa doesn’t want to walk away empty-handed. Ricardo tells her to stick it out, try to have a kid with Rod. She can always divorce him later. But right now, she has to stay married or their family could lose everything.

Dr. Erika gets the scoop on Rod’s growing up years from Gavi. Rod is the oldest brother in a well-off, good family. He didn’t see his parents a lot as a kid, but did spend time with his cousin Aaron while they were away at school. Rod and Aaron are very different in character…. Gavi doesn’t want to say directly that Aaron is a womanizer, out of loyalty to her former boss. Dr. E wants to know if Aaron tried to hit on Gavi.

At his apartment in DF, Aaron spins around in his chair as he talks to Pamela on the phone from Miami. He counts the days until he will see her again, he needs her.… Minnie steps into the room. He needs…. tequila! Aaron starts talking shop and hangs up. Minnie wants him to turn off his cell phone for the afternoon, so they can focus on producing a little Montalvo.

Back in the garden, Dr. Erika tells Gavi that a sensitive child may react negatively to surrounding influences and enter adolescence with insecurities. For example, children of alcoholics can have an aversion to everything associated with drinking. It’s possible that Rod reacted Aaron’s behavior with women by refusing to treat them as sex objects. Gavi perks up. Rod’s problem has nothing to do with sex, it relates to love. Rod loves one woman: Gavi. He feels imprisoned without her by his side.

Just then, Rod is pining in his office for Gavi, he needs her by his side!

Gavi wants to know why Rod would stay with Isa. Dr. Erika suggests that there could be economic factors. But regardless, Gavi is the woman for Rod. Dr. E starts in about how wonderful it can be to be with the one person you love. Gavi’s eyes fill with hope.

Still at work, Rod hears a knock on the door in his office. It’s Sophia, again. Isa was acting so strangely when Sophie said goodbye to her just now. If Rod doesn’t return to the apartment this very evening, Isa might kill herself!

Benvenutto has taught Clarita how to make Italian hand gestures. They want to know how the talk with the doc went. Gavi asks them if they can all go back to DF early tomorrow. Rod needs her! Clarita is thrilled. Ben is a little disappointed.

Rod is at the bar again. First he hears Gavi’s words that she would never forgive herself, or him, if she broke up his marriage. Then she hears Sophie’s voice, Isa could take her life if Rod doesn’t return to her this very evening!

Back in Cuernavaca, Gavi is pining for Rod at her balcony, as she looks out into the night and has flashbacks of Rod.

In DF, Rod enters his apartment with a somber face. Isa is thrilled to see him! He’s not really sure what’s going to happen in the future, but he’s going on a business trip for a couple of days to several ports. She’s going to Acapulco to stay with friends. But she’ll be back in time for New Year’s Eve. He says, back in time for what? To spend it with you, she says. Rod reluctantly agrees and they hug.

Aaron is in his apartment, screaming on the phone to Onate about the tequila shipments. If Rod finds out, they will be ruined! He barks at Onate to keep him informed and hangs up. Enter Minnie. Good news, she says. Rod and Isa are back together. Aaron tells Minnie the best news would be if she stopped talking to Isa so much!

It’s morning again at Montalvo Corporation, Rod is preparing for his trip. There’s still no word from Mariana. Elvira arranges his ride.

There is a knock on the door. It’s Gavi, she tells him in a soft, relaxed voice that she has come back for him. They kiss and he steps back to look at her. He presses his hand from his lips to his cheeks, to get more of her kisses on his face.

Where have you been? She tells him about the vacation and asks if he missed her. He was afraid that she had left again, after everything that happened Christmas Eve. They are about to kiss again, but Elvira knocks on the door. The ride to the airport is ready. Elvira leaves. Rod tells Gavi he’s going on a trip and so is she.

Outside Rod’s office, Aaron calls Elvira to give her his greetings. Elvira mentions that Mariana has returned to the office, unfortunately.

Rod tells Gavi the news. It appears that Aaron is using the two of them to cover for shady tequila shipments. Rod wants to check at the ports. He’s going to Veracruz, and he wants Gavi to go to Manzanillo. It’s top secret! Before he leaves, he runs back to kiss her several times.

Isa leaves her apartment, eyeing the door to Francisco’s apartment. She remembers his sloppy kisses. Just then, his door opens. He tells her she can’t possibly go to Acapulco alone, he needs to join her. They embrace, but her cell phone interrupts. Minnie is in the neighborhood and can give Isa a ride to the airport.

Isa gives Francisco the address of the hotel where she will be staying. Frankie swivels around in smug anticipation as Isa steps into the elevator.

Outside, Minnie mentions that Mariana has returned to the office. Isa tells her Rod will be gone anyway. Minnie starts in on Rod and Mariana, but Isa confronts her. The family now believes Mariana is innocent, because she wasn’t with Rod over the holidays. Even if Isa caught Rod and Mariana making love, the family wouldn’t believe her! Minerva says, that’s why you need to keep your eyes open, for specific proof!

Rod is at the docks in Veracruz, in a hard hat and an expensive suit. He checks the clipboard as the workers look on nervously.

Gavi calls her mom from the airport. Her cell has been giving her trouble, so she may have it off. There aren’t any return flights from Manzanillo until tomorrow.

In Manzanillo, Gavi has white hard had to match her skirt and heels. She walks with the shipping manager toward the docks. Onate spies her from across the yard and sends the minions off to make sure all the illegal tequila is hidden completely. Mariana Franco must not know he is there! Onate calls Aaron to tell him Mariana has arrived.

Back in the sticks, James tells Padre Come that he is desperate. He doesn’t know what’s going on with Acacia and fears that Meliton will take advantage of her amnesia and abuse her again. Cosme agrees to check on the situation, but not mention James.

At Arroyo Seco, Acacia is smiling and feeding the chickens. Meliton is sitting with his only friend, the bottle. He flashes back to Rod’s threats to him at the hospital. If anything happens to Acacia, you will pay! Meliton leers at Acacia and wipes his face. No one is going to take her away from him!

Rod calls Clarita, and she confirms Gavi’s cell phone is off. When she tells him Gavi has to stay in Manzanillo for the night, Rod hangs up.

At a hotel in Manzanillo, Gavi asks if they have a reservation for Engineer Rodrigo Montalvo. Yes, they do for another day. Is there another room available? She needs a place to stay tonight! She gets a room and asks where she can buy clothes.

Back in DF, Minnie tells Aaron about Isa’s trip. Aaron wonders, is Isa…alone? Minnie sputters, Of course, she’s alone! Onate calls to report that Mariana didn’t find anything suspicious at the ports. Minnie badgers Aaron to ask Onate if Mariana and Rod are together. Aaron screams at her to shut up, the shipments are more important!

Minnie tells him to shut up. She’s going to get proof of Rod and Mariana’s infidelity, with or without Aaron’s help!

In Acapulco, Isa is baking by the pool. The slimy Francisco arrives. They embrace.

In Manzanillo, Gavi is walking on the beach. The only thing missing from this beautiful scene is Rod. She hears her name and turns to find Rod running towards her. They kiss and he lifts her up and spins her around.


Advances (for Monday)
• Sophie cries bitter tears as Danni leaves
• Aaron tells Patricio to be man
• Rod and Gavi spend an evening at the beach
• Minerva plays detective

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Acorralada #102 – 6/7/02 – Thursday – Rene's Dimples Return!!!

Recap of yesterday's WWF event in Orlando. Octopus is leading Peyote by the hand through the lobby. She's going to have Puncho arrested for bigamy. Peyote just whines that she still loves her Varon. Octopus is wearing some cheesy purple one-piece polyester jumpsuit. Hideous can't begin to describe it. I'd be humiliated to be seen with her in an upscale hotel lobby if I was Peyote as well.

Fidiota and Dimwit are lamenting the evil Bruno. Bruno wants to see Dimwit suffer the worst possible pain because Maxi-Moron loves Dimwit more than Debora and Marfil. Bruno wants to die knowing Dimwit will NEVER see Mini-Max again! Orchestra of Doom. . .

More mother-daughter boring conversation about Puncho. "He's trash!" v. "I love him!" This boring scene is interrupted by Pasta. "What is SHE doing here? I want her out of MY house NOW after what she's done to MY daughter!" Now all three start fighting amongst themselves. Pasta storms out saying he wants Peyote out of his house immediately!

Maxi-Moron is faux crying. His eyes are squinty but I see no tears. His adam's apple is bobbing. He doesn't want to leave the hospital not knowing where his son is. Marfil talks him into going home with her. It's pointless for him to remain; they can return tomorrow morning. He finally agrees and they leave.

The Keanu Reeves look-alike doc is re-bandaging The Mummy's hand. He wants to know if she plans to undo the bandages around her face. Mummy says no. They discuss her wounds. Her face will be OK, I believe, but all her hair has been burned off. She and Sylvie can now bond over wigs.

Dimwit and Fidiota are still discussing Bruno and the missing baby.

Debora tells Doc Keanu that her name is Raisa Campos. She has no family. Apparently someone saw the fire and rescued her. Pobre de Raisa. After DoK leaves, she tells us no one can know she's alive. Everyone is going to pay for what has happened to her, including Dimwit!

Emili-Oh and Caramel are in la sala talking to Little Doormat. Little Doormat tells them about Mini-Max and asks about Orlando. "Let me tell you about what happened in Orlando!"

Lala is "nursing" Puncho's wounds, by pressing on them to cause the most pain. She basically says he deserves what he got for having both wives at the same hotel. Puncho doesn't get it. He's a Varon! He wants to go to Perfumes 'R Us and punch Emili-Oh. Lala doesn't like that idea. Finally Lala slaps his face in the same place he got punched by Pasta and/or Emili-Oh.

Octopus is waiting for Pasta with a drink in her hand. Pasta walks in and wants to know if Peyote is finally gone. "There's something you need to know about her. . ." says Octopus. The OoD strikes an ominous chord.

Sandy and Sylvie are drinking in Paco's Palace. Sandy looks like a raccoon with blue make-up surrounding her eyes. Sylvie, ah Sylvie. She's got some sort of lavender wig that makes her look like a Lhasa Apso. I think she's got pony tails sticking out both sides of her head. They are lamenting their bad luck with men, but Sandy points out Puncho is the lowest of low! Of all the gin joints in the world, who should walk in but Camila and Doc Evil. Oh, they are NOT happy to see Sylvie!

Eugenia is helping Isabel clean the apartment. They are discussing what to do about the baby. Isabel is afraid if she tells the police, they will think she stole the baby.

Fidiota is tucking in Dimwit for the night. Heartfelt music plays in the background. As Fidiota enters the hall, she runs into Caramel and Gaby. "It's best to let Dimwit sleep right now. You can see her in the morning."

Yolanda, Rene, Lunkhead, Emili-Oh, Marfil, and Max are discussing Bruno. Max says something about Bruno daring to do something, but I couldn't understand. The Orchestra of Doom did, since they hit a crescendo and we cut to commercial. Does anyone know what this was all about? I was too tired to replay it eighty times to figure it out.

Pasta and Octopus fight about Peyote living there with them. Octopus says Peyote needs her. Pasta calls her an unfit mother. About the only thing they can agree on is Puncho being a loser. Pasta wants Peyote gone. He storms off and Octopus comments that if only that imbecile knew Peyote is his daughter.

Camilla, Iggy, and Sylvie exchange words. Finally a fight breaks out and everyone in the bar is involved, extras included.

Emili-Oh and Maxi-Moron are discussing the missing Mini-Max. Emili-Oh apologizes for not telling Max that Max was the father of Dimwit's baby. Emili-Oh was sworn to secrecy by Octopus and didn't want to lose his job at the factory. Max says he understands. Max's Adam's apple is bobbing in and out while Max is trying to force himself to cry for the scene. He goes back to lemon sucking mode with a single Glycerine Tear of True Dolor slipping from his eye.

The Miami jail has never seen this much action. The set designers have been working overtime. Everyone from Pasta's bar has been hauled in. With a touch of reality, Iggy and Camila have been thrown into the same cell. Sandy and Sylvie are thrown into another. In true telenovela fashion, who should Sylvie and Sandy be sharing a cell with but the transvestites! Happy reunion time, but the reunion is cut short. A fight ultimately breaks out between the two sets of cells. CFM's and purses fly back and forth and everyone is shouting. Peppy disco music plays in the background.

It's the next morning and Dimwit is on her way to the hospital, against Fidiota's orders. She tells Gaby and Caramel she is going to renounce Max to Bruno, in order to find the whereabouts of Mini-Max.

Diablo is in the Library pacing back and forth. He tells us he can walk normally now, but he's going to play the role of invalid for Dimwit's sake. Only Puncho knows the truth. He needs to be able to walk in case Bruno spills the beans about his involvement with Mini-Max's disappearance. Suddenly we see the door crack open. "Tu!" says Diablo. "Now you know my secret!"

Little Doormat wants Dimwit to tell Max first, but Dimwit refuses. She has to renounce Max forever. ***Can someone explain to me why Dimwit doesn't just tell Bruno what Bruno wants to hear? I suppose if she did the logical thing, we wouldn't be calling her Dimwit.***

Max is having a conversation with the police commissioner. Yolanda asks what's going on and if he's heard any news. They then talk about Bruno being an evil woman. Marfil overhears and defends her mother and yells at Yolanda. Maxi-moron heads off to the hospital with Marfil scurrying after him. Yolanda follows them out.

The nurse takes Mummy for a walk. Dramatic music plays. Who should walk in but Dimwit. The Mummy is impactada. Dimwit recognizes the Mummy's eyes. "What's your name?" Dramatic music plays. Commercial.

Diablo starts yelling about "Now you know my secret!!! Come here right now and close the door!!!" Poor Nancy walks in and Diablo starts strangling her and threatening to kill her if she says a word to anyone. Maybe now Nancy will get Diablo out of her system. Why would anyone want to hurt poor, sweet, innocent Nancy? She's even more naïve than Little Doormat! Jorge really needs to save her.

The nurse tells Dimwit Mummy's name is Raisa. Dimwit wants to know why she can't speak for herself. The nurse says Raisa is timid. She has burns on her hand and face. Dimwit excuses herself and our "fiery" Little Formerly-Blonde Weasel gets hysterical. She wants to return to her room pronto. She doesn't care what the DoK says! Once back in her room, she decides to take her vengeance on everyone while she's in Mummy mode.

Dimwit goes into Bruno's room and talks to DoK. In violation of HIPAA, DoK tells Dimwit Bruno is not doing well. They are expecting the worst.

Diablo is still throttling Nancy. He keeps yelling at her to keep quiet. Tears are pouring down Nancy's face. He stops strangling her long enough to make her promise not to say a word to ANYONE, including his mother, that he can walk. When she asks why, he says he has his reasons. He promises her if she keeps his secret, he will dump Dimwit and love her. Only her. They can be together forever. Nancy the Ninny believes him and swears she won't say a word. As they hug, Diablo rolls his eyes at the camera.

Maxi-Moron arrives at the hospital with Marfil. As Marfil is running into Bruno's room, Max wants to know if Bruno has said anything about the whereabouts of Maxito. "Not a word," says DoK.

Rene is visiting Yolanda. He wants to propose something. "What?" asks Yolanda. "When Maxito is found, I want us to get married." The Big Doormat starts to protest, but Rene says he doesn't want to talk about the age thing again. I don't want them to talk about the age thing again either. At the end of the scene, it looks like Yolanda is seriously thinking about it.

Marfil enters Bruno's room where Dimwit is waiting at Bruno's side. Bruno is still asleep.

Little Doormat calls Max and tells him that Dimwit is going to renounce him in order to find out where their son is. O of D. Commercial.

Rene is still begging Yolanda to say yes. I'm on the edge of my chair. Finally she agrees and we get to see the dimples I've been missing all these episodes! Those dimples are worth the 45-minute wait! Rene is so excited he lets out a whoop as he exclaims "We're engaged!" Yolanda actually softens and appears the happiest I've seen her these past 102 episodes. I bet she's thinking that if the show ends soon, maybe she'll get to wear better clothing on her next telenovela.

Max rushes into Bruno's room looking for Dimwit. "Did she promise anything to Bruno?" Marfil has no idea what he's talking about. Bruno is still asleep. Marfil wants to know what Dimwit was promising. "Nothing," says Max.

Cousin Eddie's wife Princess Fiona is swigging brandy, lounging on the bed, and uttering the name "Maximiliano! I've never been able to forget your kisses." This is too disturbing for me to even contemplate any further. Thankfully, the scene is short.

Diablo is screaming at Little Doormat for meddling in his marriage and calling Max. He is reading her the riot act when Fidiota comes downstairs and wants to know what all the yelling is about. "Nothing" they say in unison. Diablo rolls away and Fidiota tells Gaby she's on her way into court to talk to the judge about the case against Little Doormat. They hug.

Dimwit is talking to DoK. She has to promise Bruno she'll dump Max in order to find out where her baby is. Her baby needs her. She needs to make the sacrifice. Now DoK doesn't look like Keanu Reeves to me. The heat in Arizona must be affecting my eyesight.

DoK agrees to let Dimwit see Bruno and make her pact with the devil, but he needs to check Bruno first.

Eugenia is bringing the newspaper and milk to Isabel. The baby recording starts playing in the background. As they go to check on him, the camera pans to the unread paper. Front and center is an article about the stolen baby.

DoK asks Bruno if she can handle another visitor. Dimwit want to promise her something. Marfil wants to know what. Bruno agrees to see Dimwit. DoK motions Dimwit in and makes Bruno promise to not get agitated. Bruno wants to be alone with Dimwit. Once Dimwit and Bruno are alone, they stare at each other while the O o D hammers away.

As Eugenia is leaving, she tells Isabel to relax and read the paper. Isabel picks up the paper and sees the article about Maxito. She runs to the door screaming for Eugenia to come back quickly!

Dimwit promises a million times she'll dump Max. She and the baby will move a bazillion miles away where Max will never find them. She swears. Bruno gloats. Show ends.

Credits roll.

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