Wednesday, November 04, 2015

Yo No Creo En Los Hombres #81 Tue 11/3/15: The Truth About Isela


·        Josefa warns Ari not to stick his nose in and begin causing problems for her and Maleny.  They’ve got plans and he’s not part of ‘em.  But, if he lends them a hand in screwing over Claudio Bustamonte, she’ll return the favor with his venganza against Orlando.
·         
·        At Doris confirms that Alma is sick with the big C and that Isela’s dumped Clod. Orly doesn’t believe it cuz he secretly knows Ise’s affair is part of her venganza against Clod.  He plans to intervene again, because from what he knows about the old guy, he doesn’t deserve any of what Hosie and Co. have planned for him, much less his wife and his buddy Leo.
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Tuesday, November 03, 2015

Antes muerta que Lichita #31 Tuesday 11/3/15

Hey folks, today's episode of Lichita was brought to you by the letter "Roberto is a jerk" and the number "Luciana's past catches up to her..."

Roberto "accidentally" has a night of passion with Luciana at some fancy hotel's romantic suite. He wakes up and gasps "what have I done? The worst idiotez of my life!" He ditches her and runs out on a huge bill for the suite and champagne and stuff.

Luciana's mom is a huge and outrageous character. Augusto sends some of Luci's hair off for DNA analysis to see if she's actually his daughter.

A crew from Ikonika will go to Buenos Aires to shoot some photos for ads for Grimaldi's high heels. Everyone is excited about the shooting (shoe-ting?), but Luciana (obviously trying to stay out of Argentina because of the outstanding criminal charges against her) gets Lichita to go in her place.

It turns out to be a lot of fun. She gets close to Alex, he looks at the sexy shoe models and mentions that true beauty doesn't come from the physical, they go out to dinner, and of course he teaches her to tango (though the dance they wind up doing doesn't even appear remotely like tango). Also, while there, she happens to see a news article about the outstanding arrest warrant for Luciana (for the theft of the Duke's ring)!

Luci and her mom are cute and hilarious together... They're all dolled up at some publicity event, and Luci's deflecting questions about where her fiancé is (boy, the advertising business in novela-land sure is obsessed with magazines about publicity professionals), when she's approached by a reporter. Luci preens a bit, expecting flattering questions about her wonderful life, but is horrified to be asked about the jewelry theft! No one is supposed to know about that!!!

Roberto visits Mateo and tells the kid about his secret plan. They're gonna go run away and live on a beach somewhere. There's no way kidnapping your own kid can turn out wrong, right?

Magos overhears Luci preening and boasting about her night of "passion" with Roberto. According to her, her cuerpazo unleashed unknown passions in the poor man. Sure didn't look that way, but ok, whatever you say, Luci.

Now we come to the sniveling part of today's programming. Roberto begs and pleads for forgiveness from Lichita. For an agonizing half-second she looks like she might actually fall for it, but she's super strong and cool and reads him the riot act. The most ghastly part is when he tries to tell her he must still be important to her because he took her virginity! The nerve, the presumption, the awfulness!  He snivels and pleads some more and finally gets her to come to a restaurant with him so no one will overhear the "important" things he needs to tell her. But the idiot takes her to the restaurant of the hotel where he had his rendezvous with Luciana (and ran off without paying). His pathetic and already-failing pleas for forgiveness are further undermined when the hotel boss dumps the itemized bill for the romantic evening on the table (for Lichi to gawp at) as the bellboy holds up the magazine cover with Beto and Luciana on it!!!

Ok, that was rather satisfying...

Previous: Episode 30
Next: Episode 32

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Pasión y Poder #1 Martes 11/3/15 Debut


Dear Readers,

The Upper East Side, the North Shore, and Newport have become rather tedious in recent times. The death of Ann Grenville and the closing of the ranks on all that concerned her and her family moved me to finally tell the truth in print.

For which reason I am no longer welcome in their circles.

I was due for a change anyway. Having spent more than one season in Purgatory among people with too much money has made me eager for new territory. Even Europe fails to satisfy. Therefore I have set my sights to the south where – with the help of a friend who provided a new identity – I will continue my study of the self-proclaimed upper crust. I will write for Vanidades while gathering all the dirty linen needed for my next novel.

You are the privileged set who will receive the previews. All I ask in return is if you see me at a charity ball or in one of the fashionable restaurants that you keep my identity – and these words – to yourselves.

                                                                                                      – D.D.

Chapter 1: Mixed Doubles

It has often been said that no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. That is true with the exception of a few people with the dubious privilege of serving those who live behind those doors. They are well-paid for their silence and they play their roles in circling the wagons around their employers to prevent any injury to the public image of the household or its masters. Information can leak, however, and sometimes it falls into hands such as mine. These people worry about such things.
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Lo Imperdonable #120 Mon 11/2/15 The Worst Gran Final Ever!


My friends, we deserved better than this.  Enough said.

"I yam what I yam!"
– Popeye

In Pablo's apartment in Mexico City, Manuel makes a lightning switch from blubbering bathos to manic menace.  He is going to be the same Manuel Sánchez Álvarez he has always been – cause why fix it if it ain't broke?  He jumps up, and grabs the paper Pablo and Ana Perla have signed, and waving his gun at them, backs out of the room.  Ana Perla, instead of shouting for joy that she and Pablo are still breathing, lets out a tearful  ¡No puede ser!

Tying up the turkey

Daniel, trussed up with gauze, watches Verónica drawing up an injection (which we never see her use).  Daniel can't believe Vero has been fooling him.  Virginia was supposed to give Vero the medicine.  "Virginia betrayed me!  Arrrrrrghhh!"

A quick cut to the vecindad and an 'Oh crap' moment for someone who richly deserves it.  

Chelas has just tucked his loaded gun into his waistband; he opens his door to two policemen with their guns drawn.

It's so annoying when your uncle won't let you go out and kill people
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Monday, November 02, 2015

Yo No Creo en los Hombres #80 Lunes 11/2/15


Chapter 80: Death Sentence

Maria Dolores told Max about Alma.
Isela told me your mother has cancer. She's had tests that detected it. She had Isela accompany her to the clinic. It's been confirmed. Your mother has pancreatic cancer.”
Tell me it's not true. Please tell me it's not true.”
My love, listen to me. If you only knew how much I wish it weren't true.”
If it is, she has to fight. I've got to be with her so she can go on and beat this disease”
Of course. You'll be there for her and I'll be there with you.”
I'll talk to her about going to the doctor with her about the diagnosis and what's happening.”
My love, you have to know that she didn't want you to know.”
What?”
Isela said so. Your mother told her.”
But Isela didn't tell me. My mother doesn't want to worry us.”
Of course but she didn't tell Isela anything else.”
But she needs to know that I know and I'm going to help her out of this.”
The most important thing is that you remain calm and strong. I'm going to help and I'll be at your side at all times. Everything will be alright. Everything will be alright.”
Max cried quietly as Maria Dolores embraced him.
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Muchacha Italiana Viene a Casarse #50 Mon 11/2/15 (Mex 70-72) Petey peters out

Ciao, amici del Patio!  Here's what I can make out from what they showed us.

Showdown between Granny and Petey ends predictably:  He will damn well do what's good for the family and the business and whatever else SHE tells him.  They trade charges of disrespect.

Roxi interrupts Gael and Gigi's tender goodbye.  She sucks up the tears and turns the bitch-o-meter on high.

Granny wins and Fiorella and Gigi move out.  There is a scene of them, Fidel, Simoneta, Quina and gardener dude crying together and pledging to stay in touch.  Aitana comes to eff with Fiorella as she packs in her room.  Fifi gives us a welcome but short flash of sass as she tells Aitana she'd better back down before she get's smacked down.  It's dark when the girls leave.  Freddie, Sonia and Roxi stand outside to watch and mock.  Fifi and Petey have a few minutes for more plaintive, empty phrases of hope for their love.  Fifi gives Pedro a small wad of tissue.  Vitto interrupts them and collects Fiorella.  Pedro mouths a wimpy, "take care of her."  Pedro opens the tissue.  It's the diamond ring he gave her that day on the rickety, rocky boat of love ride.

Suddenly Vitto, Fifi and Gigi are in his living room where we are reminded what Italian bumpkins they are when Gigi picks up an expensive vase and almost drops it.  Next they are in the room the girls will share.  GAG ALERT:  Vitto tells Fifi he is ready to receive her in their room when she is ready.

Osvaldo presents Aitana as an executive assistant in what I guess is a board meeting.  Pedro has cara de WTF and Freddie gives him an "in yo' face" glare.

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Antes muerta que Lichita #30 Monday 11/2/15: Finally, somebody who doesn't know who her real father is. About time!

The subtitles were terrible today so my recap is a little vague, feel free to fill in details. A very enjoyable episode because Alicia starts to see improvements in her life due to her own merits.

Mr Reasonable tells Beto that he and his wife, after years of fertility treatments, had managed to have a son, but he died of cancer three years ago and the wife went into a terrible depression and now needs very strong drugs. Beto says, that is very tragic but it doesn't mean you get to have my son, even if he does remind you of your little angel. Mr Reasonable has to try to placate his wife at any costs and insists: "Mateo needs a mother" (though perhaps not a batshit crazy one I say) - he and Beto shake hands and say "may the best man win."

Alex tells Alicia he came to Mexico to forget a broken romance. He cries. She says, you need your family. Also, lots of girls think you're cute. He gives her some excellent advice: to stop turning every word into a diminutive because that makes it sound like she's apologizing to the whole world. (Her mother does it even worse.) She agrees to try.

I have the suspicion that Alex is shorter than Luciana and Chuchette and whenever he's in a scene with them he's standing on a box. What do you think?

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TELEMUNDO Y MÁS: Celia, Bajo el mismo cielo, Señora Acero and Preciosa Perla: Week of November 2, 2015

Here's a new page for the current week.  Enjoy what are arguably the two most interesting shows on Spanish language television right now – and the third one that is paying all the bills!

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La Vecina Highlights and Discussion #95-99 Nov. 2-6

The following is said somewhat in jest.

I was reading an online review of another telenovela and La Vecinca was mentioned in passing. The author called it "del montón" (run-of-the-mill; ordinary).

Excuse me?!

Dude. There are OVNIs. There are rockets (and jokes and dirty sketches). There are spacey sound effects.

¿Del montón?

I don't think so.

PS: If you want to stake your claim to a recapping day leave a comment.

Previous: Episodes 90-94

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¿Qué nos cuenta, Caray, Caray!? (November 2 2015)

Hola Carayites!

In this week's edition:



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Sunday, November 01, 2015

Yo No Creo En Los Hombres, Cap 79 Fri October 30, 2015, or To Embrace the Truth Or Not

By Joni, posted by Urban Anthropologist

Scenes combined for clarity


The Return of Isela's Conscience

Isela looks as guilty as homemade sin and genuinely worried about Alma as the latter reveals her cancer status to the former at the oncologist's office.  Alma confides to Isela that no one else knows about her cancer diagnosis, not her sons or her husband.  Isela hugs Alma and reassures her that everything will be alright. 

Leo and Claudio discuss why Isela and Alma are so close since Alma accompanied Ise to find an apartment after the Fermin fiasco threat.  Leo doesn't quite understand their friendship--honestly, neither do I; but that's neither here nor there--and Claudio clarifies that Alma appreciates Isela and Isela provides Alma comfort and company.  
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Saturday, October 31, 2015

Lo Imperdonable #119 Fri 10/30/15 Desperately Seeking Those Anvils

Hi all. This will be my last recap for "Lo Imperdonable". It has been such a pleasure recapping this one. Many thanks to my teammates NovelaMaven, AuntyAnn, Princess Juju, Adriana, and LatinaInMD for their wonderful recaps throughout the show's entire run. Many thanks also to all those who joined us here on The Patio. Watching this show with all of you has made the experience more enjoyable.

Well, here we are on the second to last episode, and the anvils still haven't arrived. They must still be in the shipping process. Darn. Mejia should have paid the express shipping. We'll have to wait until the very end it seems. Let's hope the anvils will be satisfying.

Now on to the recap...


She's Alive 

Veronica makes her grand entrance at the presentation of her jewelry collection and leaves the entire Prado Castelo clan and Claudia stunned. Virginia wonders if Veronica has recovered her memory.  

Rebeca annouces Veronica and asks her to come up onto the runway. Veronica gets onto the runway and walks over towards Marty. The two stare at each other. Veronica gives him a small smile before she enters character and pretends to reject him. When Marty goes to embrace her, Veronica gets into her character and backs off, rejecting him in front of everyone. 

Veronica then goes and embraces Virginia who she asks to protect her from Marty. This further stuns the Prado Castelo clan as well as Claudia who has the best stunned facial expression in the scene. 


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Friday, October 30, 2015

Muchacha Italiana Viene a Casarse #49 Fri 10/30/15 (Mex 69) "You're Fired!" or Granny Trumps Petey's Ultimatum!

Ciao a tutti e mille grazie per essere venuti!  Muchisimas gracias a todos y gracias por venir!  Yes, I think at this point we need to thank all of YOU for watching and hanging out on the Patio with us!  Mille grazie to all my Peeps for your kind words and witty observations on Monday!  Well, folks, today's horror/dramedy installment is quite simple and scenes will be combined and not necessarily in order of broadcast.

Granny dresses Fifi down real good but, considering the reviews we've gotten on her uniform and pigtails, this was accomplished weeks ago.  Anyway, Granny rips Fifi another one!  She wants Fifi and Gigi out TONIGHT and Fifi's begging on bended knee does not move her!  She is to get a limited severance check, pack her rags and git!  Back with this later.

In other developments, Sergio is released from the hospital and the jailhouse.  Julieta and Pedro flank him on either side and the Lawyer is there as well assuring them that the investigation into Anibal's henchman's involvement in the arson and the attack on Sergio will continue.  A not so cleverly concealed Anibal, wearing a demon hoodie, stands behind a skinny tree and watches the group leave.  Later, once the group arrive at El Rancho, Julieta and Sergio warmly and sincerely thank Fiorella for all her help.  She graciously accepts their thanks and welcomes Sergio home.  Much later Julieta leads Sergio in some breathing exercises to relax him but the knife attack in the jail comes flooding back in vivid detail.  He shakes as he realizes he could have been killed!  Julieta holds and comforts him.  Pobrecito!

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Antes muerta que Lichita #29 Friday 10/3012: Luciana and Roberto's relationship is over... now her new target is Alejandro... suddenly he is the magnet of Iconika



Bea had reacted alarmed when she learned Elsa sells her food at the agency. Elsa skips a breath. But Bea says ‘blessed be God, I am so glad we allow the more humble folks to earn a little money at the agency.’ This gets a nasty facial expression from Lichita and a sigh of relief from Elsa.


Daphne keeps talking about how good she feels (like shes at home) when she is around the Gutierrez. Bea says glad you behave so good around some folks. And that she should do the same here at home.


Elsa says she always thinks every child is different…


Bruno and Brisas… seems she lost a hard drive of his… she swears she will give it to him tomorrow. She wants to give him a ride home. He says better not, don’t want to get lost in all the things that you have in your car.


Lichita is leaving the ‘dinner party’. And so does Roberto want to, but Luciana pulls him by the arm and won’t let him leave just yet. She has to beg ‘dale, flaco!” it is obvious he is really uncomfortable with Luciana suggesting the night is young and we can still have LOTS of fun…. Daphne makes a comment of what Luciana’s idea of having fun is… Alex rants at Daphne and apologizes to Roberto. Roberto walks away, Luciana asks Daphne to not be like that… ‘we all had fun… didn’t we?’ Luciana walks away too. Daphne is grunting through the teeth… Daphne again mentions the email she sent Alex to him…


On their walk out to the car, Roberto does make a point when Luciana keeps mocking the Gutierrez… he says her words don’t speak well of her. Luciana claims that ‘those people’ are made for that, for us to mock them… ‘because they are ‘nacos’… Roberto says you don’t even know how to respect people, he wonders how she was educated to undermine people like that. She asks him why he is so irritated. HE just leaves… she says all the idiosyncrasy hurts…


At the house, Nacho and Lichita cuddle up… he tells her he can’t quite keep quiet when Roberto is hanging out with Luciana when he thought Lichita and Roberto were dating… Lichita tells him maybe she got together with the wrong guy. Nacho says all he wishes is that when she does really hook up with the guy, he hopes she is happy. He tells her to keep alert and working at Iconika… one of these days they will throw her a nice bone… (opportunity). You can do it, mija…


AT apartment, Roberto is telling Gumaro ‘I can’t stand my gf!! How do I get rid of her??’ Gumaro says you asked for it… Roberto says he can’t let Augusto suspect anything. Gumaro suggests operation Onisco… basically the strategy (operation molusco [shut seashell] is to bore the heck out of Luciana…


Said Luciana is on phone with her mom… mom is ranting that dad spent all the money and can’t sell a painting even by accident… we are living social embarrassment, having to live off the ring you stole from the Duke. Mom keeps ranting that Luciana fled and left them with all the messes to clean up. Repeats that Luciana can’t go to Argentina or otherwise she will end up in jail, with the striped uniforms that don’t do anything for your figure… Mom suggests Luciana should talk to the Duke and try to convince him to retire the accusation. Luciana refuses.


Roberto gives GUmaro Augusto’s wallet and asks him to find out everything he can about all the guy whose business cards are in the wallet… Roberto is determined to not let anyone take his child from him.

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Muchacha Italiana Viene a Casarse #48 Thu 10/29/15 (Mex 68) A story of a sauna

Welcome again, Special Guest Recapper sneaky two shoes!

Sonia has locked Pietro and Fiorella in the turned on sauna, but she doesn't know they are both in there. Silly Sonia thinks Fi is talking to herself

Pietro pulls out the old 'tell me you don't love me, tell me you never want to see me again and I'll go'

Fi hems and haws and can't stand the heat of Pietro's prescence or maybe its the sauna, either way she wants out but oh no! The door is locked, Pietro you scoundrel how could you? He protests his innocence

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Lo Imperdonable #118 Thu 10/29/15 Julio dies a hero and... oh no! not Padre Juan!


An alert has been issued to the surviving characters of this telenovela:  If you are not absolutely indispensible to the plot, take shelter now and do not emerge until next Tuesday.  I repeat...

Vero is still afraid of Marty, but she trusts her mama.  She agrees to go with her to a very special place tonight, no questions asked.

Manny snarls and Ana Perla snivels  
So what else is new? This: when Manny glances up at the little glass shrine to the Virgin, Blanquita bops him with the flower bucket.  He grabs Blanca's ankle, but Ana Perla conks him on the head with what may be a pineapple.  [Thanks, J, Gobluefan and Mauricio!] She doesn't hit him hard enough though, because he is still alive and writhing on the ground as the Goat girls run away.

The plan involves horses and the help of a personal assistant.

Marty has brought Rebeca's assistant to the riding club and now introduces her to his horse Sansón.

Prado Castelo Mansion - A Mother and Child Disunion
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Yo No Creo En Los Hombres, #78 Thu 10/29/15: Oh Isela...So many reasons to slap you

We open with Claudio and the other 3 lawyers revealing that somehow even though the court sent 3 notifications that Dan was to come into the station, the police shouldn’t have come to his house to arrest him. As a result, the court will have to release him immediately. (Really? Because he did flee the cops, engage in a dangerous car chase through the city and then hold someone at scissor point. You know, in case they forgot that part.) Ursula is disgustingly happy with this news.

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Antes muerta que Lichita #28 Thursday 10/29/15. "The Episode Where Everyone Fawns over Alejandro"

Alternative Title: The Episode where we count how many times Guapo and Alejandro are used in the same sentence.

Tonights episode is combination of Episode #31-#32 in Mexico.  

Episode 31
Lichita reminds the patio of her recent ups and downs...the good and the bad, the humiliations and the uhhhh more humiliations by Roberto, Luciana and fellow co-workers. The sad montage ends with Lichita at her lowest when she happily accepts her award with tears. She is the most foolish and she vows that she will never forget them. Meanwhile the crowd has the nerve to look awkward.....ummm what else did you think would come of this.

Augusto is at the happiest (and not his fake crap he puts out to others) I have ever seen him. Alex went home first but no one was there. So while he was getting fresh air, he decided to come to Iconika.

Sandra is not pleased with the rumors going around that Roberto was promoted due to his relationship with Luciana. He's about to ask whether he was promoted due to his own merit but Fatima interrupts with the news of Mr. Hottie from NYC arrival. Sandra is none to please to have the entire family at Iconika. There is a mini family reunion in Don Augusto office. Since Mr. Hottie has pulled a disappearing act for many years (studying the arts...did not catch the specifics) they will have a celebratory family dinner tonight.

Instead of working, Luciana plays detective and scopes out Roberto's place. She bumps into Gumaro (she does not know it is him) and his disgusted at his advances. She knocks on their door enough to disturb a sleeping neighbor who tells her to quit it.  She asks for the 411 on Roberto and finds out that he does not have a kid living there and Gumaro is anything but sick.

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Thursday, October 29, 2015

Lo Imperdonable #117 Wed 10/28/15

AP tells Pablo that the truth is out. She is heir to half of OG's money and the only heir to the house where Manny is living. But the worst part for Manny is that Pablo gets some of the inheritance too because he is now AP's husband, and that is the only reason Manny went to visit AP.

Vero breaks away from Marty's loving embrace. She does not know him and wants to be left alone. He calls her mi amor; she runs away and Marty goes after her.

Some of Pablo's brain cells start functioning as he realizes the reason Manny was after him and AP after Pablo had taken AP from her almost marriage to Julio. AP also confesses that Manny tried to kill her in front of OG's casket. Blanquita's screams interrupt the conversation. AP asks Pablo to help her cousin. Manny takes advantage and locks himself and AP in the room.

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Antes muerta que Lichita #27 Wednesday 10/28/15: "Free Fall"

Wow! Was this not just one action filled "impactante" kind of episode?? Before we get to the celebratory shindig for Luciana and its fallout, we will have to cover a few leftover "detallitos".

We left Dafne on the roof threatening to jump in the last episode. Alicia sees her and runs up to try to talk her down. When that does not work (the bottom line: Dafne is convinced her parents hate her and is bent on self destruction), Alicia grabs her and pulls her down from the ledge (so to speak: it is really a security fence). They both fall backwards on the cement with Alicia hitting the cement with Dafne on top of her. Alicia holds Dafne in her arms and tries to get her to calm down. Alicia offers to take her home but Dafne refuses to go not wanting her family to see her like this. To Alicia's surprise, Dafne wants her to take her to her house.

In the blink of a scene, we are at the Gutiérrez house where Alicia introduces Dafne as the "daughter of her boss" (Augusto not Roberto) to her family. (Looks like Nacho has pretty much recovered from the detached retina). Elsa welcomes her as Alicia explains Dafne is there for dinner, supper and at least breakfast tomorrow.

At Iconika, Luciana finally finds Roberto. She has been looking for him and accuses him of avoiding her. She wants to fill him in on the big climax of the joke on Alicia that will take place at her celebratory company shindig that very evening. For him the joke on Alicia is over, but it is not over for Luciana. She uses her knowledge of his false curriculum vitae and the photo of his "nephew" to convince him that the joke is not over. He tries to convince her she needs her mind back on work when she grabs him and kisses him. Augusto sees them.
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