Monday, March 18, 2013

Amor Bravío #148 (Uni 143) Mon 3/18/13




Capitulo 148: The Trap Is Set

Lo del pasado:

Camila and Mariano look over the bulls; she seems in a good mood.  Daniel asks Augustina about the passports; she tells him they are most likely still in the briefcase she couldn't get. A reluctant Sherlock Juarez arrives – with four men – to arrest her on charges of fraud.

Lo de nuevo:

Parlour: Juarez says that the Associo por el Mejor Futuro claims she does not work for them; she says she signed the documents in front of El Diablo and Hissadora. Daniel says that they must be behind the accusation leading to this arrest.  Becerra tells her not to worry; they will get a good lawyer for her right away. Daniel tells her he will talk to Teresa about getting her a lawyer. She seems to realize that El Diablo is behind this arrest and thinks that this was an act of revenge.  Sherlock Juarez takes out the cuffs although he doesn't put them on her.
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PEAM #6 – 3/18/13 – Is He or Isn’t He? What? A Gay, A Threat, A Financial Genius


Keep your fingers crossed for a better second week that will keep our esteemed colleagues on board while this plot is sorted out. 

El refrito: Fernando threatens Jesus for wanting to leave after everyone else has gone but Fernando gleefully hands this ridiculous work schedule.  He begs for reason from the unreasonable so he can go see his daughter.  The famous paws tighten into fists as Jesus reviews his ignominious arrival before getting to Avon so he humbly says he respects his boss and asks for the same and return.

El nuevo: With plenty of free time for hanky-panky and no hanky-Paty in sight, Rogue taunts Alma with a romantic dinner invitation with candles and flowers.  She gives in and they go off smiling and together for a change.

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Saturday, March 16, 2013

Amores Verdaderos #88 Fri 3/15/13 Strung Out and Hung Up On You; The Truthiness of the Pau; Would I Lie to You?

 

Good Evening Ladies and Gentleman, We have a new communique in the form of a Bark-O-Gram, that I had to get a dog whisperer to translate for me and here it is:

To The Patio Peeps: Thanks for caring about what happens to me/stop/ I have a new name/stop/Not happy with Monet/stop/Would love for people to call me Balzac as you Patio Peeps do/stop/ A gang of German Shephards and Pit Bulls stole my beret/stop/I am happy I found the Chefy Guy/stop/ He fed me premium French Bread and Gourmet dog food/stop/ He and the Angel hugged me and played with me/stop/When I see the Odious Sulphurous One I'm a gonna bite her/stop/Didn't know my Master had come to visit the Chefy Guy/stop/Maybe he'll come back/stop/Meantime lovin' it here and they are taking very good care of me/stop/ I have to toodle off now so many wags and kisses, Balzac XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Now on to the recap. We start this epi with Nikki cuttin the cheese and then hiding it and Ms Vikki and Tomi come in and she assures her Mami that she is super fresh and mega cool. Ms Vikki wants to know about the therapy but Nikki so don't wanna talk about it, stalks off and Tomi tells Ms Vikki she will go after her. The Angel has come in, feeling bad about keeping secrets from Ms Vikki, but she really doesn't want to hear it. She isn't hurt by what he did, now if Tomi would keep things from her, she'd be upset, but hey, the Angel is only her bodyguard, not her friend, got that? Yeah, he gets it, but doesn't wanna. Pobrecito!
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PEAM #5, 3/15/13: Just Another Day in the Junior-High Cafeteria

Over lunch, all of the other reindeer continue to make fun of Jesús. The 3 Stooges needle him about his sexual orientation, and he responds vehemently -- "No, no, NO...soy gay!" Unfortunately there's an awkward pause and all anyone hears is the last part. Off goes the rumor mill.
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Amor Bravío #147 (Uni 142) Fri 3/15/13 The Battle for Bulls’ Run, Round Two: Gussie’s a Goner



Capítulo 147

~~Parte 1~~

Luzma wants to give up her claim to Pablo for the sake of a love she cannot comply with.  So, amidst much soul-searching and serious sobbing, she unleashes the surrogate wife bomb on Mayalen who, at first, tries refusing Luzma’s ridiculous suggestion. 

Rodolfo, meanwhile, notices how agitated the spousally abused Pablo is as he’s saddling his horse for himself for once.  Rod’s job is to saddle the horses for his dueños and cannot allow Pablo to injure himself (further) by improperly cinching the saddle and falling off in mid-angry gallop. When Pablo yells that he can do it himself,  Rod offers a bit of free marital counseling.   “--Please her [dar gusto] instead, and give her what she wants.  Whatever it is won’t last long [temporal= temporary, short duration] and she’ll get over it soon enough.”  (H-m-m-m, I don’t think being subjected to surrogate wife-hopping is exactly what ol’ Rod had in mind, though.)

“—But what if Pablo doesn’t want to or worse, what if he does get hooked on me?”  It’s gonna kill her when he realizes there are other women out there to choose from and finally is gone, Luzma sobs, but their marriage is not working and it isn’t his fault.  He shouldn’t have to suffer like this!  (How about just suggesting Luzma ask her psych to double her meds and double up on her therapy sessions instead?  Hmmm?) .  Maya weakens a bit and then finally relents.  “—Are you sure this is what you want?”  Yup, assures Luzma.  She tells Luzma to count on her support then.  (Something tells me it’s more like inside she’s thinking, “--Just point the way and lemme at ‘im!”)   

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Friday, March 15, 2013

TELEMUNDO Y MAS -- WEEK OF MARCH 18, 2013

Here's a fresh page for your comments.*

*I'd tell you all to Beware the Ides of March but heck, it's almost over anyway. :)

Have a great week!

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Amor Bravío #146 (Uni 141) Thu 3/14/13 Amor Despedido


Agustina walks in on the face-sucking duo of Dio and Isa…in the bedroom!  She gives Dio one good smack for it, then starts telling Isadora off.  Isadora is unrepentant.  Agustina threatens to tell Cayetano, but Dio roughly pulls her back into the room and dismisses Isadora.  Before she leaves, she throws it in Agustina's face that she was ridiculous to think a playa like Dio would ever want her.  "Tell her all about our hot nights together under her roof!"  Agustina cries and asks why he married her if he never loved her. 


Out in the hallway, Isadora says it's about time Augie found out so she can have Dio to herself.



Agustina keeps yelling at Dio, about having trusted him, taken him to La Malquerida, put him above her daughters.  Dio tells her to shut it already.  She enjoyed being with him, so she can just cut it out.  Agustina demands to know how long he's been cheating on her.  Dio won't answer.  He's in the middle of a dinner to ask for his daughter's hand, and no one's going to run in that for him, so she can shut up the easy way or the hard way.  "What's the difference?"  Dio pulls out a tie and brandishes it in front of Agustina.



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Thursday, March 14, 2013

Amores Verdaderos #87 Thu 3/14/13 of beatings, hush hush meetings, and scheemings

Which one of these does not belong?

Thugs           |           Guns
____________|_________________
                    |
Sunglasses      |          Hospital Beds

'I am sure! I always took care of preventing it'   (LOL!!! BWWAAAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!)
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PEAM # 4-So Far The Qualities of the Avon Personnel- Silly, Immature, Rude and Horny

Alma is missing Rogelio, while Rogelio is doing the horizontal mambo with Patti.

Jesus is talking to Chatita about being unemployed.  He was offered his job but he doesn’t want to be a secretary. Chatita asks if he dresses like a woman with those bulky arms.  No, no, no.  He considered the secretarial job but he is over qualified.  Chatita tells him with all of the unemployment, his financial needs and needs of his daughter, he should be thankful that he has been offered a job.  Its better to have something to save than nothing.

The two small guards are stuck to Jesus who wants to speak to Alma, who just arrived to the office.  Sorry to says but the only thing that those two inept guards could catch is a cold.

Vero the zero, calls The Avon Company to find out what type of job Jesus has, because when she asked him about his job he hesitated.   She knows Jesus well and he knows when he is lying. Elias (the saint, because she is a real pain) doesn’t like the taste of the coffee and he gets a lecture about how coffee is not good for you. It’s a drug that irritates the stomach. (She is beginning to irritate me)  He can’t add sugar because it adds calories, and the milk should be skim. Vero asks for Jesus and the secretary doesn’t know anyone by that name.  Jesus enters the office, is scorned by the secretaries who were insulted by his secretary results.  The secretary, who answered the phone, asks for his name- Jesus- hmm.  She knew it, he was lying.  (Vero must eat peppers for breakfast because she is so mean.)

Jesus speaks to Alma and asks for her to forgive him in regards to how he reacted to the secretarial job.  Alma tried to call him by cell, but he doesn’t have a cell phone. He apologizes for acting like an ass.  He wants to know if the Executive Secretary of the Regional Vice President position is still available.  He has to stop saying perdon.

Vero remembers that when they were dating he always lied. (With her shining personality, I would wonder why)   Elias, the voice of reason, tells Vero that she should lighten up, maybe no one knows him because he is new.   She knows when he is lying and Elias wants to give him the benefit of the doubt.   Elias feels that he should be involved in his daughter’s life and Vero disagrees.   What a bitter bitch!!  He left her.  Okay Elias gets it, but they still have a daughter. She is stuck on the fact that he owes lots of back child support if he wants to see his daughter.

The three silly men of the office want to check out who this new secretary is.   Once again there is a lack of productive work taking place at a major company. They will ask the secretaries.  The hot pink suits were gossiping about the ruckus that took place yesterday with the idiot.  Susana doesn’t get Alma. The secretaries are hoping that the man is not hired.  He insulted them.  Yada, yada, yada. The three sillies couldn’t believe it and start asking questions.  They can’t understand why Ms. Alma received him as if nothing happened.  The 3 sillies are in disbelief.


Fernando is in the warehouse admiring Jessica’s legs while she works, trying to get a whiff.  Good news- she can come back upstairs, he spoke to Alma.

Jesus is hired as the Secretary.  A humbled Jesus thanks Alma for the job.  Cardenas wants Jesus to wear the secretary uniform- the hot pink (fuchsia) suit.  Cardenas tries to size up Jesus, but his measurements are off.

There is an electrical handshake between Alma and Jesus.
Fernando is going to help Jessica unpack her things.  Alma wants to know why Jessica is back, because Jesus Garcia is the new Secretary of the Regional Vice President.  Everyone is laughing.  Alma introduces Fernando because they are going to share secretaries.  Jesus gets a cool reception from 2 of the 3 secretaries.

In Acapulco- Rogelio and Patti are still honeymooning.  Patti wants to stay another day but Rogelio has to get back to work. He calls Alma, and is miffed because Alma doesn’t answer her phone. (Is he serious?)

Xochitil is the only one that speaks to Jesus.  Jesus asks who is the one that is shooting evil looks at him and is always in a bad mood- Susana, the Regional Director’s secretary and the other one is Maricela.

Jesus answers the phone to a rude Rogelio, who yells and curses at Jesus and demands to speak to Alma.  He is the Director, Jesus tries to transfer the call and it gets cut off which further infuriates Rogelio.  Rogelio wants to know- who is the idiot that answered the phone. (Rogelio, were you talking to yourself?)  Rogelio didn’t know anything about him being hired and wants him fired immediately.  Rogelio is quite bothered that Alma hired a male secretary.

A tearful Jessica is crying because she has been returned to the warehouse.  Fernando is confident that the new secretary will not last.  He will make his life miserable. 

Jesus felt bad and asked forgiveness for messing up the first call.  Alma tells Jesus to use the word perdon, sparingly.  He is to call her Alma.  Alma wants to know if Jesus needs any software.

The secretaries have been instructed not to speak to the new secretary Jesus. Susana is very bothered that Jesus said that he is over qualified.  Rule number one- no one defends Jesus.  Jesus will not be well received in this department and he will learn what secretaries are capable of doing. (Besides gossiping, acting immature and wasting time.)

Jesus asks for the password for the computer and gets the sarcastic treatment.  They tell him that the password is info Avon which is incorrect, Xochitil whispers- general03.  Fernando calls Jesus to his office.  He didn’t respond because Fernando called for a secreatria not a secretario.  Fernando acts badly and intimidates Jesus because he is his boss.  He orders Jesus to bring him a hot cup of coffee.  Jesus doesn’t know where the cafeteria is.  He asks the portrait of the Virgencita to help him and Xochitil points him in the right direction.  Jesus tries to make the cup while Susana watches.  She starts with her sarcastic remarks about how he should be qualified enough to make a cup of coffee.  He apologizes for his degrading remarks.  Susana doesn’t accept his apology.

Okay, I get it, he insulted the secretaries, they were hurt, and he apologized so let’s move on.  This silent treatment is childish.

Jesus brings Fernando his coffee, it wasn’t in his cup and Fernando has a hissy fit. Who knew that it was the giant neon green cup with his picture on it?  It was not hot enough, this time it was hot enough but tasted terrible.  The next cup was too cold,
Jesus wants to throw the coffee in his face and Jessica knows how he likes his coffee and offers her help, in her teeny weenie skirt.  She shows him how to make it sweet enough and hot enough.  She takes it to him.  He shows him how to fold the napkin too.  Of course, this time, it was perfect.  Jessica tells Fernando that the new secretary is aggressive and she told him what se heard Jesus says about throwing the coffee in his face.

Fernando interrupts Alma to tattle on the new secretary.  Fernando tries to fire Jesus and Alma tells him that he can’t fire him.  He tells her how Jessica told him what Jesus said about disfiguring his face by throwing coffee into it.  Fernando leaves the office since he didn’t get his way.  Jesus says perdon once again and Alma reminds him about the constant use of the word.  Believe it of not she has more important things to do, so she dismisses him.

Jessica thought that Jesus was fired, and Fernando tells her that Alma took Jesus’ side.  Jessica starts to cry once again.  Fernando is going to call his brother because blood ids thicker than water.  Rogelio is not a fan of the secretary either.  Fernando whines all types of insults towards Jesus and Rogelio is on his way home.
Alma sends Jesus to lunch.  He will bring her something to eat since she doesn’t have time to eat.  She is used to not having lunch. 

The four bitter secretaries are talking about Jesus as he enters the cafeteria.  His access is denied.  The three silly men allow him to sit with them.  They tell him that he needs to bless his food.  They join hands for grace.  They introduce themselves Gilberto, Julio and Roberto, I will continue to call them the 3 sillies.  They throw indirect insults about his manhood.  One silly asks him if he is from the other side and he takes it to mean that he worked in Chicago.  Another silly asks if he likes men, and Jesus makes it clear, that he does not to the enjoyment of the whole cafeteria, with the exception of Xochitil.

Coming attractions- Fernando is still calling Jesus Encanto, Patti is drooling over Jesus and Rogelio is not too happy.  Rogelio yells at a calm Jesus and wants to fight him

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Amor Bravío #145 (Uni 140) Wed 3/13/13 "Push-Me Pull-Me Love All Around (Besides Breaking TN Ultimos Capitulos News)"


Old News del Pueblo:

Dio’s  Den of Dishonor:  Dio informs Agustina that they will be hosting an event at the house this evening – the asking of Novia Nat’s hand in marriage by Yucky Yago.  He demands that Agustina make it an affair to remember.  Agustina refuses to host if Isa is to attend because she cannot abide having Isa in her home.  Dio demands she will do as he says or she can pack her bags and …..  Agustina shrinks back and agrees to do whatever she needs to do to please Don Demon Dio.  Agustina thought bubbles her worries about how she will be able to keep up the façade of the host and housewife.

Living Room at La BV:  Cayetano and Isa arrive home after Isa has been freed from the pokey.  Isa complains she is tired and anxious to take a long hot shower after her ordeal in prison.  Viewerville is anxious that she don any other age inappropriate apparel than what we have been looking at for the last few days.  Bratgirl wanders in and Cayetonto introduces the two and they exchange pleasantries. For now.  Yago wanders in and pleads a big favor from Pops and the new missus.  He asks them to come with him to his future father-in-law’s place for phony pedida dinner tonight.  This is the night he will be asking Nat’s parents for payola er, her hand in marriage.  Cayetano hesitates, but Isa obliges, fake-graciously, leading viewerville to sniff a whiff of a rat in the vicinity of La BV.

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Amores Verdaderos #86 Wed 3/13/13 The Adventures of Rocky & Bull Twinkie, the Special Chutzpah Edition


Old stuff:  Polita and Lili  are sighing over Frankie, Lili silently and Polita aloud.  Jean Marie spies on Estéfano and Tomi.  [Why isn't Balzac barking like crazy?  What kind of dog is he anyway?]  Nikki is still trying to be honest with the psychologist.  Alas, much of what she believes to be true is a lie.  [But let us trust in the therapeutic process.  Right, EJ?]

New stuff:  Nikki tearfully confides to her shrink that her only true amiga is Kendra; and after being betrayed by the man she loved (that would be our boy Frankie), she is back with good old, dependable, wouldn't hurt a fly Roy. 

Clichés?  Yeah, but sometimes they help.
The psychologist talks about her unhealthy relationship with food. Nikki listens dutifully to the positive, love thyself message and agrees to do her homework: every day, she'll write three good things about herself or her life.  He warns her not to make any important life decisions until her illness is controlled. Vikki joins them at the end of the session and agrees to support the principles of successful therapy:  patience and persistence.

Jean Marie knows about the power of food too.  He plies Estéfano with a dessert so magnificent -- it's all in the quality of the wine and the vanilla from Madagascar -- that the two men lock eyes, joined by the magic of the moment.  Tomi gapes in wonder.

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Wednesday, March 13, 2013

PEAM (#3) 3/13/13 - Caveman's famous last words: ‘Secretary? Me? Never!’

Here is Jody's recap for you all to enjoy!

Cheers by the neighbors for Chucho - he is surprised and happy with welcome. He
enters the new apartment and looks around. He mutters to himself about Veronica, this
is a good enough place, he thinks. He sits down and remembers his meetings with Alma.

Chatita, in her apartment, reads a prayer on the back of a photo. She puts it down and
goes to living room, and starts to talk to a photo of her husband - she misses him and
her son so terribly.

At sunrise, Alma is sleeping in her bed. She wakes up. In slo-mo, Chucho wakes up
and discovers there’s no water or shower head; Alma slips into a bubble bath; Chucho
has to take a bucket bath.

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Amores Verdaderos #85 Tue 3/12/13 Lies and unheard declarations of love

Amores Verdaderos Cap 85 - 3/12/13 - Lies and unheard declarations of love

I couldn't come up with a snappier title!

I'm going to do a summary and then fill in later.

A screencap to get us started.

Jealousy, thy name is Nikki!

BRIEF SUMMARY. I'm phoning it in tonight. Hopefully will fill in more later! But I have a few screencaps this time. (Video capture is processing. Maybe more tomorrow!)

EVENTS MAY NOT BE LISTED IN ORDER. I'm just regurgitating it all from memory.

* Refrito of Roy the Boy gloating about how he's going to pad his extravagant lifestyle by marrying a rich girl from a good family, aka Nikki. Douche!

* Refrito with Nikki telling her mom that she doesn't want Roy the Boy to know about her bulimia. Enough people know already!

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Amor Bravío #144 (Uni 139) Tue 3/12/13 The Teflon Kimodo



Suddenly Brava Agustina does her best to convince Dionicio that she’s on his side and wants only to be by his side.  She’s tells him one day Camila will realize her mistakes and ask their forgiveness.  She declares her love for him and she can’t live without him.  Dionicio isn’t quite sure he should trust her and thoughbubbles that he’s going to have to keep an eye on her.  He tells her she did the right thing – her place is there next to him.

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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

PEAM #2, Tuesday 3/12/13: The Fateful Bucket of Love

Boy, Veronica wasn't kidding when she said Jesus could have five minutes with his daughter. If anything, she was exaggerating. I think the joyful reunion lasts about 90 seconds. She interrupts because it's time for night-night.

Valentina's full of questions for Jesus: Why are you crying? Why are you so hairy and grubby? "It's a long story," he says. Fortunately, she LOVES stories! She's excited to meet him and wants to know everything. She doesn't seem to mind that he looks like he fell off the back of a truck. She is very impressed when he tells her he came all the way from Los EEUU to see her.

Vero is a different story; she corrects the child's pronunciation of "viniste" (she said "veniste") and tells her again to go to bed. Jesus raises his eyes to Elias in a silent plea for support; Elias signals his powerlessness with a barely perceptible shake of his head.
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Amores Verdaderos #84 Mon 3/11/13 Breaking News: Balzac Is Back! I Repeat, Balzac Is Back!


* Lo refrito: there’s a big family reunion at the Arriagas. Paula hugs Betty, Cris and Lili are happy and relieved, Guzmi clenches his jaw and exchanges uncomfortable glances with his mother, and Salsero? He just looks hot. His greasy and ridiculous Spock-like bangs situation got better a little bit. * Lo Nuevo: Paula, who’s slowly developing a sensitivity chip, decides to spare Francisco the embarrassment, so she leaves. Salsero thinks Guzmán should’ve said a good bye to her since she’s his mother, and Frankie repeats for the 1000th time that Paula means nothing to him. Nada de nada. Salsero is about to leave, too, and whoa, a miracle happens: Francisco offers him his hand. *everyone looks “WTF” in the room* The bettyguards shake hands. Bromance is in the air, yeah!

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Monday, March 11, 2013

PEAM #1, 3/11/13 – A Tale of Biceps, Yachts, Ben Franklins & a Blue-Eyed Angel


A just beginning has our hero passing through the restaurant while being hailed by the customers and boss as ChuCho or Jesus, clearly the favored of all.  It is a lovely day in Chicago for biceps on bikes to deliver pizzas to the populus.  We see Jesus’ incomparably t-shirted biceps handed a pizza then he gets on a bicycle that sounds like a motorbike but is just a hunk-powered delivery bicycle.  Drivers and casual bystanders shout out his name while he assures them he is never late.  He seems to know what each customer really wants in terms of chili heat.  I just bet he knows how much heat everyone needs… oh, but where was I, it‘s way, way too early for hallucinating when it’s only the first 5 minutes.
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Amor Bravío #143 (Uni 138) Mon 3/11/13





Capitulo 143: Cuidate Mucho


Lo del pasado

Camila and Daniel throw the devil out amidst some heated words and a creepy threat. Daniel really wants to pound the crap out of him as he departs with his Satanic laugh trailing him.

Lo de nuevo

Kitchen:   Piedad, Dorotea, and Eleuterio were listening as this happened and know all they need to know. Dorotea reminds him that he had once overheard something important. [Yes; something he needs to repeat to Daniel.]
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Saturday, March 09, 2013

Amor Bravío #142 (Uni 137) Fri 3/8/13 A Downer Of A Day For Dionisio Ends With Dan-Cam’s Boot In His Backside


capítulo 142

Mariano has bonded with Baby Agata and Miriam ad nauseam ad infinitum and  has just left with Cam whom he’s now counseling  in the drive to forget Daniel by being resolute in her decision to begin a new life once Dan and family have finally left La Malquerida.  (Okay, okay. He’s got ulterior motives here, but we’ll give him a pass for this since he’s one of the good guys and may fall for Mir before this shindig’s over.)  Cam has chores to do and walks away.  He walks off to get his truck and runs into little bro, Pablo, who tells him he’s still hoeing that long road to Luzma’s returned emotional stability, aka, a normal sexual drive with her new hubby.  He’s certain though, that she’s the one for him and always will be--but damned if those blue balls aren’t gettin’ to be a passel of a hassle which New Gal Turned Neighbor will undoubtedly be more than happy to assist in remedying for him, should it come to that!

Inside the cabana, Dan has started a new password-discovery program on Alonso’s computer to try breaking the code.  However, it’s still not working.  In walks Mir with Aggie and Dante.  Daddy makes “daddy’s little girl” goo-goo eyes at her.  Mir mentions she’s going over with the baby to Mariano and Ana’s new digs to help them move in.  Dan says fine and she leaves Dante there to keep him company.  They can talk to their hearts’ content [largo y tendida= at great length] she tells them.  When Mir’s gone, Dan tells Dante that there, in her bedroom, he lives just to breathe the same air as Camila.

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Friday, March 08, 2013

Por ella soy Eva #162 Friday 3/8/13: Fin

Part I: The Curious Case of the Missing Elements
by Madelaine

Before I start this recap I want to thank all of the recappers for this TN and all the commenters who made Por Ella Soy Eva such a fun ride, and I'd especially like to thank Julie, for sharing her Friday night recapping spot with me, gracias Amiga. Now on to this fab finale epi.


So we start this epi with Rebe having absconded with Onesimo's gun. Remember that cause it is important later, you'll see.
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