Tuesday, April 07, 2020

Me Declaro Culpable #36, 4/7/20: Everybody Doesn't Like Someone

Aqua House o' Drama

Ingrid runs out into the street and pulls Mauro off Julian. Mauro promptly breaks up with her, although it's not clear whether the precipitating factor was the sleeping around, the sleeping around with a subordinate, or the interruption of the strangling of the subordinate. Either way, she's been a really annoying girlfriend. "Hospital!" croaks Julian. "Tequila!" hisses Ingrid. She wins. Nobody turns off the car alarm.

Cafe TMI

Tizzy drops in to taunt Gael about his apron. "I knew you were a terrible lawyer, but this is your side gig?" Gael tells him he's just helping out "Blanquita" -- I'm not sure the diminutive is evidence of advancing intimacy, but I'll take what I can get -- and if he's late to work, Tiz can go ahead and sue him. After Gael dashes off with some plates, Tizzy copies Franco's hotel info from the napkin where Gael had jotted it down.

Reclusorio of Misdirected Emotion

After Natalia hits the floor, Paolo flings himself out of his wheelchair so he can lie down next to her and pet her like a kitty. Now he's twice as mad at Rufino -- "Look what you did to this poor, innocent girl!" I'm surprised she can get up from under the weight of all that irony, but before you know it she's back at Paolo's place having a conversation that's so boring I've forgotten it already. Anyway, she remembers Julian saying it would be better to be hated for being Juls' flip-flopping arm candy than for being Paolo's fateful instrument of doom, so she calls her favorite mental retrograde and asks him to come and get her.

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Monday, April 06, 2020

Primetime on Univisión (#1): Amor Eterno & Sin Miedo a La Verdad - Week of April 6, 2020

Greetings, Caraymates!

Welcome to page 1 of Primetime TNs/Series!  We have 2 new TNs starting this month! “Te Doy La Vida” starts on April 13th at 8 PM and “Como Tu No hay Dos” starts on April 27th at 10 PM. “Amor Eterno”  continues with recaps from AnonFri and Nett (we hope to see Clara back soon). If some other brave soul(s) would like to contribute a recap or just some highlights for AE or SMALV, I’m sure that it would be appreciated. You can also add to or clarify scenes/details, especially those that are favs or not-so-favs. The TNs covered by this page are:

8PM  - La Rosa de Guadalupe
9PM – Amor Eterno: Season 2, Ep. 180-182
10PM – Sin Miedo a La Verda NS

Friendly reminder:  PLEASE put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post so readers can easily find the conversations they're looking for. (You can shorten the title to one word, i.e., “Eterno”.)

Discussion pages will be posted on Mondays and Thursdays at 9PM.
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TELEMUNDO Y MÁS (#1): Cennet, La Doña 2, Operación Pacífico más: Week of April 6, 2020

Welcome to Page 1 (Monday edition) of the Telemundo y Más page, issued twice a week:  Mondays and Thursdays at 8:00 PM.

Here are the current evening telenovelas (all times are Eastern Daylight Time):
  •  8-9PM -     Cennet*
  •  9-10PM -   La Doña 2
  •  10-11PM - Operación Pacífico**
*On Tuesday, April 7 Telemundo will begin airing the Turkish telenovela Cennet, with Spanish subtitles.  The story follows Cennet, a young woman who was abandoned as a baby and who fought valiantly all her life, desperate for a lost motherly love.

**Presumably Telemundo will continue with the hour-long Coronavirus update at 10 PM Eastern Time on Mondays, replacing Operación Pacífico that evening.

Everyone is welcome to join in the conversation.  Since discussions of all the Telemundo novelas share the same page, please remember to put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post so readers can easily find the conversation they're looking for.

By common agreement, this group DOES NOT discuss previews, trailers, or any other plot information not found in a current or past episode of the current production.  Spoilers WILL be removed by the admin.  This includes references to earlier productions of the story, and even the original novel.  Thanks for your cooperation!

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Me Declaro Culpable #35, 4/6/20: Mauro Makes his Move

Hi Patio!  Have you ever noticed how the best part of an episode usually comes during the very last nano-second?  It sure did today.  We got to see  canny old fox Mauro trap Julian when he tried to turn off the car alarm in his snazzy convertible. And then wrap a black leather belt tightly around his neck, ready to squeeze all the man juice out of our treacherous lawyer.  Of course it's too soon for Juls to make an exit, but still--the sight was sweet indeed.

That was not the only damage done.  Roberta, dressed in bright spring pink today, deliberately slammed her hand in a door in order to have grisly proof for a legal medical expert that hubby Franco was abusing her.  Evidently father and daughter are both prepared to go to painful lengths to insure that they get what they want, when they want it.  Remains to be seen if this drastic strategy works.
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Friday, April 03, 2020

Me Declaro Culpable #34, 4/3/20: Da Bomb Was a Dud but the Warning Was Not

Our JuJu Princess Prognosticator was right! Franco and Alba don’t leave the series—yet. However, it could have been possible to have something go awry, cause some damage, maybe even require hospitalization. Instead, we get some aftermath canoodling in the NoTell Café, where everybody knows your name business, especially when you don’t hide it. 

Let’s Begin at the End (of Yesterday)
Franco and Alba are in the bomb-armed car (confirmed by Franco by using his cell phone as a selfie mirror—very clever). They are clutching each other for dear life, like maybe it’s the last time they’ll ever feel something. Neither wants to leave the other. They just wait, terrified, for the explosion. Mystery man calls again and says, in essence, “Fooled ya. But I’m your worst enemy and be on guard, because I’m gonna eat you little fishy.” (Well, actually that was Cat in Red Dwarf—see: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMlDlu-MTRo). Franco and Alba are celebrating their near miss. He tries to explain there are lots of folks out there who might be provoked by hatred and revenge, but never taken to this level. Alba is horrified. Franco entreats her into more macking and canoodling. He tells her, “All I need is you and a couple of whiskies.” Since they never got to Gabe’s to give him the news, Alba will text him to come by later. Meanwhile, the hugging goes on and Franco’s brilliant white teeth practically light up the place.
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Me Declaro Culpable #33, 4/2/20: An episode full of bombs

Morning patio peeps! My apologies for this super late recap, I'm so stressed out that my body just shut down, I was getting ready to recap and next thing I know it's five am and my cat was chewing on  my hair. Now on to our recap:

Natalia and Pablo:

 Pablo learns from Franco that Natalia is hiding out in Morelos with her friend Valentina, Franco gives Pablo Valentinas address and Pablo rolls down there for a final visit with Natalia, basically they breakup (again)- this leads to Pablo later having a crying fit, getting drunk and crawling around his bedroom floor, thank goodness for his bro who comes in, picks him up and gets him coffee, then he throws a fully clothed Pablo into the shower.

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Thursday, April 02, 2020

Primetime on Univisión (#2): Amor Eterno & Sin Miedo a La Verdad - Week of Mar. 30 – Apr. 3, 2020


Greetings, Caraymates!

Welcome to page 2 of Primetime TNs/Series!  AnonFri is recapping Amor Eterno with assistance from Clara…and now Nett has joined them!! If some other brave soul(s) would like to contribute a recap or just some highlights for AE or SMALV, I’m sure that it would be appreciated. You can also add to or clarify scenes/details, especially those that are favs or not-so-favs. The TNs covered by this page are:

8PM  - La Rosa de Guadalupe
9PM – Amor Eterno: Season 2, Ep. 177-178
10PM – Sin Miedo a La Verda NS

Friendly reminder:  PLEASE put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post so readers can easily find the conversations they're looking for. (You can shorten the title to one word, i.e., “Eterno”.)
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TELEMUNDO Y MÁS (#2): La Doña 2, Operación Pacífico, y más: Week of March 30, 2020

TELEMUNDO WEEKEND EDITION (continuación)

Here's Page 2 for the week.  The current evening telenovelas are as follows (all times are Eastern Daylight Time):

• 9-10PM—La Doña 2
• 10-11PM—Operación Pacífico

Everyone is welcome to join in the conversation.  Since discussions of all the Telemundo novelas share the same page, please remember to put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post, so readers can easily find the conversations they're looking for.

By common agreement, this group DOES NOT discuss previews, trailers, or any other plot information not found in a current or past episode of the current production. Spoilers WILL be removed by the admin. This includes reference to earlier productions of the story, and even the original novel. Thanks for your cooperation!

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Wednesday, April 01, 2020

Me Declaro Culpable #32, 4/1/20: Nat confessed to Pao, Bertie offs herself instead, and Ingrid just vaporizes with Javier


NOT!!! Just a bad April Fools’ Day joke.   ~meh~  Actually, this is episode #32 out of 62 episodes, so we’re at the point of no return.  On the downhill slide.   Some scenes are combined, while others are glossed over or completely ignored.   (No guarantee on accuracy.  Please feel free to correct any mistakes.) 
 No Gael & Bianca sightings,   and Mauro was a busy guy today.

NATALIA & ALBA

Nat tells Alba she chickened out on telling Pao the truth and deleted the video from the new cell phone she bought for him.  The patio is not surprised.  Convo   that follows is more of the same. And they discuss Franco & Roberta’s pending divorce.    Lather, rinse, repeat.  Boring.

JULIAN & KATIA

Julian call Katia to tell her Paolo and Natalia are planning to marry.   If they work together, they can stop it.  So they meet at a local hotel room to work on their scheme of outing Natalia.   The only thing Julian really works on is macking on Katia, who has now become another notch on his belt of babes bagged. We are spared that scene. Ew.  Cooties.  I hope he has had his shots.   Katia, too. 

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Tuesday, March 31, 2020

Me Declaro Culpable #31, 3/31/20: Some Very Illogical Decisions

A Fake-Out and a Wimp-Out

Paolo rolls up on Natalia while she's confessing into the phone and...he's wearing earphones and doesn't hear a thing. Cheap trick, writers. They have an endless back-and-forth over a lackluster dinner: she insists he watch the whole thing, not just the syrupy intro, and he tries to get her to just tell him whatever. Finally she pouts so much he agrees to do what she says she wants, which of course causes her to immediately change her mind. Bok-bok.

Later he accidentally deletes the video. These two together do not add up to one even mildly interesting person.

Bufete of Revolving Doors

Gael gleefully shows Julian into his new storage space office and takes away his liquor. Now that's just cruel -- how can you seek justice without the juice? They don't teach that in Televisa Law School!

Bertie materializes in Franco's office and, for her next trick, conjures both Alba with the coffee and Tiziano with the divorce papers. Franco is justifiably suspicious. Once he and Alba are alone, they have a karma-tempting exchange about how they are getting closer and closer to their goal. What's actually getting closer and closer is Mauro, who bursts in and catches them kissing.

Alba flees and the two cross dull verbal swords ("What is with you?" -- "No, what's with you?") until Franco remembers to spill the most important bean about the divorce -- that it was Roberta's idea. When he churlishly asks if Mauro can just accept that, his suegro tells him not to trip over the desk on his way out...after he drops his resignation on it. Buh-bye.
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Monday, March 30, 2020

Primetime on Univisión (#1): Amor Eterno & Sin Miedo a La Verdad - Week of Mar. 30 - Apr 3, 2020


Greetings, Caraymates!

Welcome to page 1 of Primetime TNs/Series!  AnonFri is recapping Amor Eterno with assistance from Clara…and now Nett has joined them!! If some other brave soul(s) would like to contribute a recap or just some highlights for AE or SMALV, I’m sure that it would be appreciated. You can also add to or clarify scenes/details, especially those that are favs or not-so-favs. The TNs covered by this page are:

8PM  - La Rosa de Guadalupe
9PM – Amor Eterno: Season 2, Ep. 174-176
10PM – Sin Miedo a La Verda NS

Friendly reminder:  PLEASE put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post so readers can easily find the conversations they're looking for. (You can shorten the title to one word, i.e., “Eterno”.)
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TELEMUNDO Y MÁS (#1): La Doña 2, Operación Pacífico, y más: Week of March 30, 2020

Welcome to Page #1 (Monday edition) of the Telemundo y Más page, issued twice a week: Mondays and Thursdays at 8:00 PM.

Here are the current evening telenovelas (all times are Eastern Daylight Time):

• 9-10PM—La Doña 2
• 10-11PM—Operación Pacífico**

**On Monday, March 30, Operación Pacífico will not be shown. Instead, Telemundo will air a 1-hour program entitled Coronavirus: lo que debes saber hoy (what you need to know now).  Both the Telemundo site and Zap2It agree. However, it might nonetheless be wise to check at 10 pm on Monday to be sure.  Telemundo has surprised us at times in the recent past.  Also, La Doña 2 has at long last reached its etapa final  (¡Ojalá!)

Everyone is welcome to join in the conversation.  Since discussions of all the Telemundo novelas share the same page, please remember to put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post, so readers can easily find the conversations they're looking for.

By common agreement, this group DOES NOT discuss previews, trailers, or any other plot information not found in a current or past episode of the current production. Spoilers WILL be removed by the admin. This includes reference to earlier productions of the story, and even the original novel. Thanks for your cooperation!

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Me Declaro Culpable #30, 3/30/20: Secrets Discovered, Confessions Made, Dreams Lost, And Roberta's Still Crazy

Boy, the action was fast and furious this afternoon, even if Roberta committing suicide was all a Franco wet dream.  We see her inserting the pistol into her mouth, and suddenly Franco wakes up with a start.  He's been chastely cuddling with Alba, she under the sheets, he on top (of the sheets! what were you thinking?) and realizes the suicide was just a nightmare.  He does a double check to make sure the café door is securely locked, and then comes back for more chaste, reassuring snuggle time.

Home Sweet Home

Meanwhile Roberta and Mauro, both awake back at the house, are having a contentious papa-daughter chat.  She KNOWS Franco is not working late as he claims.  For sure he's with that Alba bitch. Mauro defends her as a "pobre muchacha" which ticks Bertie off big time.  So, you love her more than me!? (Well Alba did save his life, whereas Bertie tried to take it.  Sooo.....)
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Hijas de la Luna Index

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Sunday, March 29, 2020

CarayCaray Lexicon for the Patio of Lowered Expectations - Part III






TELENOVELA-SPECIFIC GLOSSARY

Beso Interruptus – A near kiss, which would have been consummated between a couple, had it not been for some crucial (and probably fortuitous) interruption by a third party. (Doris’ mini-cap in Y Mañana Sera Otro Día.)

Can’t letgoitis – Refusal to admit that a lover or marital partner can move on. (Nandicta’s recap in AQNMD.)

Chickenitis – Disease produced when someone has the opportunity to say or do something to clear up misunderstandings and doesn’t. (Nina on AQNMD referring to Paulina not telling Adrian about his daughter Valentina)

Creative Constipation – Label used for telenovelas that can’t “go.” (Lila referring to where Vino el Amor was trying to “go.”)

Cue the Kayak – When a scene in any telenovela gets too tedious, this phrase is shouted out begging for the end credits to appear. (Etymology: Where kayaking did not feature in Triunfo de Amor, but accompanied the end credits. Originally from the pen of wordsmith Capt. Silvia Sharkbait referring William Levy in TdA.)

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Friday, March 27, 2020

Me Declaro Culpable #29, 3/27/20: Apparently Denial Isn’t Only in Egypt

Coupling While Camping
Ok, I concede. They did it. Neither had ever felt the way they did ever before. It was like flying, but this time they flew together. On with all the hijinks for today.

It’s a Fizzle
The confrontation that we all thought Alba was contemplating as she flew out of the coffee shop when she left Blanca turned into a nothing about even less. She points at Mauro and tells him that because of his *relationship* with Ingrid, he’d better not be planning anything to prejudice her case. Mauro Denies anything of the sort. Berta is relieved. Mauro promises to back up Franco in her case.

Bertie’s plan to have Franco back in the matrimonial bed backfires. He’ll be sleeping in Nat’s room until she gets back, then he’ll occupy the guest room (although Pops may still be in it). He collects his glasses and some books and departs, leaving Berta in her black and white night clothes, surrounded by all her doo-dads.
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Me Declaro Culpable #28, 3/26/20: The war is on!

Hi patio peeps! Below you'll find the recap for yesterday's episode. I apologize for being unable to provide a recap last week but I'm in California and our governor placed us on lockdown- but failed to give clear instructions on who could still work and who had to stay home, in the end my industry is considered essential so I still have to go to work. In addition to this my sister got her first lupus flare in years and she can't even go near a hospital because her doctors don't want her to be exposed to COVID-19.

This recap will be short and not in order, I just want to go to bed, working and dealing with the public has left me exhausted, and paranoid and my anxiety level is at 100%.

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Thursday, March 26, 2020

Primetime on Univisión (#2): Ringo, Amor Eterno. Sin Miedo a La Verdad - Week of Mar. 23, 2020

Greetings, Caraymates!

Welcome to page 2 of Primetime TNs/Series!  AnonFri is recapping Amor Eterno with assistance from Clara…and now Nett has joined them!! If some other brave soul(s) would like to contribute a recap or just some highlights for AE or SMALV, I’m sure that it would be appreciated. You can also add to or clarify scenes/details, especially those that are favs or not-so-favs. The TNs covered by this page are:

8PM  - La Rosa de Guadalupe
9PM – Amor Eterno: Season 2, Ep. 172-173
10PM – Sin Miedo a La Verda NS

Friendly reminder:  PLEASE put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post so readers can easily find the conversations they're looking for. (You can shorten the title to one word, i.e., “Eterno”.)

Discussion pages will be posted on Mondays and Thursdays at 9PM.
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TELEMUNDO Y MÁS (#2): La Doña 2, Operación Pacífico, y más: Week of March 23, 2020

TELEMUNDO WEEKEND EDITION (continuación)

Here's Page 2 for the week.  The current evening telenovelas are as follows (all times are Eastern Daylight Time):
  • 9-10PM -   La Doña 2
  • 10-11PM - Operación Pacífico
Everyone is welcome to join in the conversation.   Since discussions of all the Telemundo novelas share the same page, please remember to put the name of the telenovela you're referring to at the top of your post, so readers can easily find the conversations they're looking for.

By common agreement,this group DOES NOT DISCUSS previews, trailers, or any other plot information not found in a current or past episode of the current production.  Spoilers WILL be removed by the admin.  This includes references to earlier productions of the story, and even the original novel.  Thanks for your cooperation!

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Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Me Declaro Culpable #27, 3/25/20: Family drama: The gift that keeps on giving


No snark, just the facts.   Comcast had perfect TV reception for this show today, unlike the past two weeks and this morning.  Telenovela gods were shining down on my TV.  Yay!

NATALIA &  PAOLO STUFF

We open with Paolo on the phone, telling Natalia about how Katia showed up and told him she met some guy last night whose ex-girlfriend did a hit and run on some guy a few months ago.

ROBERTA  (WHO ELSE?) STUFF

Roberta, looking no worse for the wear after last night’s escapades, comes to the office for yet another confrontation with Mauro about her childhood, mother, etc.   It’s the same old, same old, claims she is done lying and covering up for Mauro and she wants to kill him!  So she does.  This woman is strong, but then she single-handedly  choked her BFF Luciana to death a few weeks ago.

Bertie throws Mauro onto the sofa and has at it. Franco enters and breaks it up.  Mauro says she is getting dangerous again and needs to be locked up in the manicomio.  By now Bertie has an audience of Julian, Alba, and Franco, so she takes this opportunity to let them know that Mauro is the one who lit the match to set her mother on fire….may he himself die!

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